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I figured I'd join in on the fun. I'm expecting a girl in the beginning of October. I've had two previous pregnancies, both boys, and I'm finding this pregnancy waaay less tolerable than they were. :/ My first two were very similar, and I felt really good the whole 9 months. This time has been miserable, mentally and physically, enough to make me decide I'm never doing this again, heh. I don't know if it's just that I'm older now, or if the difference in the baby's sex has anything to do with it, but whatever it is, I can't wait for this to be over.
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Jun 28, 2016 05:05
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So baby is on his way. He's just taking his sweet rear end time. I've been in labor since Thursday night, but l&d sent me home because my water hasn't broken and I'm only 1cm dilated. I've been having steady contractions 3-5 min apart, but they're not at the "can't walk or talk" phase. They suck. But if baby doesn't pop by Tuesday they're gonna induce, largely because he's IUGR and is sized at 31 weeks, when I'm 37 wks. Right now, while I know every day helps, I just want my stomach to stop hurting. It feels like I've done a million crunches. I suppose in a way, I have. It sucks. E: after getting induced Tuesday night, I am now the proud mama of a 5lb 15oz goonling. Cervadil is something I will never do again. Five hours of the worst pain in my life, and a little bit of concern after my epidural, since the epidural caused him to drop into the canal almost immediately. Not even 20 minutes after the anesthesiologist left I went from 5cm to fully effaced, and he popped out about an hour after that. He did however tear me apart, which no one was expecting, since we were all planning on him being so small. Instead, he came out...Not small. Anyone have tips for dealing with the roughly 30 stitches? It hurts. A lot Dr Jankenstein fucked around with this message at 03:00 on Jul 8, 2016 |
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Jul 3, 2016 06:07
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AA is for Quitters posted:So baby is on his way. He's just taking his sweet rear end time. I've been in labor since Thursday night, but l&d sent me home because my water hasn't broken and I'm only 1cm dilated. Ice packs! Ice packs. Um... ice packs. And I imagine that the doctor will give you some pains meds as well. I only had 2 stitches, my thoughts are with you. I did make some padsicles using witch hazel and lavender oil and aloe Vera that helped a ton as well.
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Jul 11, 2016 01:28
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Get a toddler sized disposal nappy, pour about a half to full cup of water in it then put it in the freezer. Voila, you've got a bendable cool pad. They're also good for sore boobs if you're breastfeeding. Also, ibuprofen. I feel for you, I ended up with a fuckton of stitches and it took me about three weeks before I could sit down without cringing.
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Jul 11, 2016 01:58
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Holy moly 30 stitches? For a 5lber? How does that happen? Was it the speed of delivery? I had a 9lb baby and came away with only a couple of stitches for a tiny grade one tear.
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Jul 11, 2016 03:42
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AA is for Quitters posted:E: after getting induced Tuesday night, I am now the proud mama of a 5lb 15oz goonling. Cervadil is something I will never do again. Five hours of the worst pain in my life, and a little bit of concern after my epidural, since the epidural caused him to drop into the canal almost immediately. Not even 20 minutes after the anesthesiologist left I went from 5cm to fully effaced, and he popped out about an hour after that. Congratulations mama! I am 4 weeks postpartum with my (7lb 10 oz at birth) beautiful daughter after an induction with Cytotec that left me with a 3rd degree perineal tear, sulcus (vaginal) tear, and labial tear. They tried to stitch me up in L&D, but after 40 minutes they wheeled me back to the OR for 2 hours of emergency repairs. When I asked how many stitches they said "a lot" and admitted they lost count. Not to mention the 2 L blood loss from the tears. So- I kinda know how you feel. Tips: Take Ibuprofen and Percocet/Codeine (whatever narc they offer) religiously as long as you need- I did an unmedicated birth and had to use Percocet every 6 hours for the first week postpartum just to function. Lay on your side with a pillow between your legs whenever you're not nursing (if you breastfeed), showering, etc You will need help- accept it. You should only be in charge of feeding and bonding with the baby. You are not going to cook, clean, entertain anyone and if anyone is visiting and not helping they can GTFO. Sitzs baths every 2-3 hours or if you're like me and can't stand to sit on a toilet lay in a shallow bath with or without epsom salts for 15-20 minutes. Install a pull down shower head and 1-2x per day gently spritz your perineal area on the lowest setting with warm water. Constipation is your new enemy- take Docusate everyday and if you start going 2-3 days without pooping you need a stronger laxative. The longer it festers the worse it gets. Drink lots of water to help with constipation (and help with breastfeeding)- like 1.5-2 gallons per day. Throw in prune juice and/or prunes as needed. Stairs and walking are going to be terrible- it will feel like your insides are falling out. They will not actually fall out, but don't be going up and down stairs all day since you will pay for it in severe pain the next day. Make a station for yourself and your baby that is on the same level as the bathroom and stay there most of the day. Have meals brought to you there. Use a donut pillow on chairs for the first week or two to help cushion your perineum. Lastly- sit on the toilet with your feet together, elbows on knees, and head in hands to poop. Try as much as you can to not squat or spread your legs. During and after urinating use the peribottle with warm water to dilute the urine so it doesn't burn your stitches. Padsicles- aloe vera gel, witch hazel, and lavender oil on the pads and put them in the freezer. Here's a great DIY- http://www.tallmomtinybaby.com/2013/05/padsicles-new-moms-perfect-companion.html Be prepared for it to totally to suck for 6-8 weeks with steady decrease in pain and increase in abilities to tolerate sitting and walking. Don't make a ton of postpartum plans to go places (car rides are not fun with tearing) and accept any and all help. The hardest part for me was releasing my expectations and letting go of that idea of a sweet postpartum period with long walks and showing off the baby to everyone, since most don't tear very badly and I felt really alone when none of my friends understood who badly I felt and I didn't communicate how terrible it can be those first few weeks. You will get better and you will heal. It just takes time and don't let anyone push you to do too much too soon or feel guilty for taking care of yourself.
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Jul 11, 2016 20:42
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^^^^ Tearing is about the structure of the mother, not the size of the baby. Do all these things.
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Jul 12, 2016 13:03
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God that's terrifying. I DON'T WANNA DO THIS ANYMORE 
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Jul 12, 2016 17:04
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Did anyone else feel like complete crap after the 1-hour glucose screen? Because I didn't puke, but I almost fainted after the blood draw (I've had more blood drawn without ill effects before) and I still feel pretty wobbly after an hour-long nap. If my results on this are sketchy, I am very much not looking forward to 3-hour test. It probably doesn't help that I was super nervous about this test and thus slept poorly last night. Edit: I passed the test with a 93mg/dl, though! ArmadilloConspiracy fucked around with this message at 20:15 on Jul 12, 2016 |
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Jul 12, 2016 19:39
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Sharks Below posted:God that's terrifying. I DON'T WANNA DO THIS ANYMORE Don't worry, everything heals up and babies are awesomeness and they have a way of making you quickly forget how rough they were on your body! I swore shortly after baybee arrived that I wasn't ever putting myself through pregnancy and childbirth again.. But here we are trying to make another one sooooo they're either totally worth it or I'm totally insane 
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Jul 13, 2016 05:24
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bee posted:Don't worry, everything heals up and babies are awesomeness and they have a way of making you quickly forget how rough they were on your body! I swore shortly after baybee arrived that I wasn't ever putting myself through pregnancy and childbirth again.. But here we are trying to make another one sooooo they're either totally worth it or I'm totally insane I know this is supposed to be reassuring, but telling me that it's going to be ok because I'll get amnesia about it afterwards (due to oxytocin or baby fever) is just... not. Hahaha.
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Jul 13, 2016 14:01
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Rurutia posted:I know this is supposed to be reassuring, but telling me that it's going to be ok because I'll get amnesia about it afterwards (due to oxytocin or baby fever) is just... not. Hahaha. Rurutia posted:I know this is supposed to be reassuring, but telling me that it's going to be ok because I'll get amnesia about it afterwards (due to oxytocin or baby fever) is just... not. Hahaha. You could get lucky and get a C Section! I was totally back to normal by 3 weeks! The first week sucked, but that's always gonna be the case to some extent.
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Jul 13, 2016 14:35
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dopaMEAN posted:You could get lucky and get a C Section! I was totally back to normal by 3 weeks! The first week sucked, but that's always gonna be the case to some extent. Major abdominal surgery is not reassuring either, hahahahahahaha.
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Jul 13, 2016 14:36
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I only had one stitch, a bigger headed baby, and no epidural. Labor was very long though which was unfortunate but now generally a blur.
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Jul 13, 2016 14:59
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I had a giant baby, a quick uneventful labor, and I didn't tear at all. I was tired and tender in the weeks afterward, but nothing terrible.
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Jul 13, 2016 15:27
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I had a huge baby, a fast labor, and a small labial tear that needed nothing more than ibuprofen. I took my two year old to the children's museum and the zoo the weekend after having his brother (born on a Wednesday).
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Jul 13, 2016 15:32
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I would absolutely hate to have a C section. I'd rather tear. I accept both of these things as possibilities but I hope neither of them happen!
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Jul 13, 2016 16:23
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I don't remember the pain specially, but I remember my reaction to the pain, if that makes sense. I'm due in two weeks and everyone asks if I'm ready to get him out and my response is not really because I remember what the other side is like. Childbirth is only one day in your life and you get to share your war story with other women for the rest of your life. I had two stitches but barely noticed them. I took no drugs after birth due to the oxytocin or whatever.
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Jul 13, 2016 17:00
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I thought labor was amazing and intense. And my recovery has sucked, but I feel much better in 4 weeks and I get to cuddle my little girl everyday which puts it all in perspective. Seriously, never underestimate the baby high afterwards and how much you'll forget what was bad/painful/terrible.
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Jul 13, 2016 18:09
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Tearchat is making it seem like toughing out that kidney stone with Tylenol, and saving the  , was a good idea. I'm kidding. Mostly.
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Jul 13, 2016 18:12
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I'm so excited to meet our little man. It seems so far away still! December?! Why, it's only July! But I'm sure it'll go fast. I found a doula I really like and click with well. She is super great.
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Jul 13, 2016 18:12
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Two things! What are the pros and cons of epidurals? Also, how can I find a doula? This is my first pregnancy, so I'm afraid these are the first of many questions with obvious answers.
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Jul 13, 2016 18:38
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Something Positive posted:Two things! What are the pros and cons of epidurals? Also, how can I find a doula? These are great questions! It is my first too, so I have done a lot of research because of who I am as a person. I strongly recommend you get the book "Expecting Better" by Emily Oster. It helped me to make sense of a lot of "conventional" pregnancy/birth wisdom. She talks extensively about doulas and epidurals in the book, and it's very objective - she is interpreting existing data, not givin gher opinion (apart from where that is made expressly clear). FOR ME, who has always joked that I would have an epidural "from 32 weeks onwards", the decision to not have one unless I really need it came primarily from the fact that they can prolong, and even halt labor. They can also make it harder to push. A very wise lady(goon) said to me once "the pain is information. use it." and I thought that was really smart. But you can bet that if I am absolutely out of ability to cope, I will be asking for one. So onto doulas. Let me say, I was actually really derisive about doulas because coming from a medical background I have only ever heard of them in the overly crunchy, home birth encouraging way that doesn't really fit with me. And I think sometimes there can be doulas that overstep the mark and try to take the place of medical professionals. That is a dealbreaker for me and all the ones I talked to in the end had a specific point about them NOT replacing a medical professional in their information. So, I think that is important. They are there for advocacy for you, and to support you and your partner, not to make medical decisions or recommendations for you. Ook after all that, I used http://www.doulamatch.net to find mine. Vermont is a fairly pro-doula state so I had a lot of choices. It is important to check with your hospital whether they will allow a doula. The hospital close to me (I never intended to go there) does not allow doulas or even midwives to be part of births soooo.... just .. check. :|
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Jul 13, 2016 18:47
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I used to be all for epidurals, then I started hearing from mommy blogs and word of mouth about 'cascade of interventions' and higher c-section rates and how you can't push as hard and etc etc. I looked into it literature wise and talked to my doctor and some L&D nurses. Some things about epidurals: 1) You can control the amount of pain management you want most of the time. My hospital uses the button and you can request that you still want to be able to feel something, you just don't want to be in excruciating pain. This helps you push as long as you can feel the pressure. 2) In large cohort studies with confounding variables controlled for, there was no difference between getting an epidural and not getting one in terms of outcomes like size of tears and rate of c-sections. source 1 source 2 3) Even if your hospital does not do 'walking' epidurals, most women are still capable of giving birth in different positions like squatting with the appropriate support.
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Jul 13, 2016 18:53
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Rurutia posted:I used to be all for epidurals, then I started hearing from mommy blogs and word of mouth about 'cascade of interventions' and higher c-section rates and how you can't push as hard and etc etc. I looked into it literature wise and talked to my doctor and some L&D nurses. Some things about epidurals: This is also a great post - sometimes epidurals can decrease blood pressure which is a recipe for a C-section so that's where the "cascade of interventions" comes from (or it's one example anyway). I hope my hospital does the PC pump too, you can give yourself a bolus to have a break then let it wear off for push-time. Thanks for linking those studies Ruru, it's interesting, all the midwives, nurses OBGYNs and doulas I have talked to as well as people I work with (womens health/repro health) have all reported that they feel like epidurals raise the rate of C-sections. The hospital I'm attending has the lowest C-section rate in the state and one of the lower ones (per capita) in the country so that is awesome (to me).
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Jul 13, 2016 18:59
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Yeah, I was fully prepared to go all natural because I really don't want a C-section, but I'm not so sure now.
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Jul 13, 2016 19:01
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Rurutia posted:Yeah, I was fully prepared to go all natural because I really don't want a C-section, but I'm not so sure now. SAM and my doula and I are going to discuss/decide on a "safe word". I want to be able to vocalize that I am in pain and struggling and wanting an epidural without people jumping straight to battle stations. 
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Jul 13, 2016 19:06
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Even if you do decide you want an epidural, you might want to look into techniques to help cope with pain anyway. Sometimes epidurals don't work or it might take a while to get it after it has been ordered. I chose an epidural with all three of my kids. With the first, the epidural worked great. The second, it didn't do a drat thing. With the third, the first doctor I saw was afraid an epidural would slow my pitocin-fueled labor and didn't think I seemed uncomfortable enough for it (despite the dying cow noises I was making) until I was fully dilated. I'm a big fan of them anyway--they're especially helpful if you've been in labor for a very long time and need a little respite.
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Jul 13, 2016 19:13
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Sharks Below posted:SAM and my doula and I are going to discuss/decide on a "safe word". I want to be able to vocalize that I am in pain and struggling and wanting an epidural without people jumping straight to battle stations. Doulas aren't covered under my insurance so I'm hesitant to get one.  My exact instructions to my husband about this though were:No episiotomy or c-section unless they think me or the baby are literally going to die.
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Jul 13, 2016 19:29
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I think the pros and cons depend entirely on what you want during labor. If you want to be able to walk around or change positions, that's likely not going to happen. Some people also have a harder recovery from having an epidural. But if you're exhausted or were in labor for two days before going to the hospital (like I was), the epidural is a godsend. There is something bizarre about being able to doze through active labor. I had previously planned to labor for as long as I could without drugs because I was afraid of stalling, then needing Pitocin to get back on track, and then potentially needing a c-section if the baby went into distress or if I didn't progress. I work for a med mal law firm that deals with a lot of pregnancy cases and I have heard all the horror stories, as you might imagine -- a real treat while I myself was pregnant. My anesthetist was great and was able to give me just enough of the drug to take away all the pain, but I could still feel pressure during contractions so that I knew when to push. I also had no problems with recovery, and in fact I felt amazing. My friend, on the other hand, had an epidural with her first delivery and she felt like she'd been hit by a bus afterward.
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Jul 13, 2016 19:29
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Rurutia posted:Doulas aren't covered under my insurance so I'm hesitant to get one. Ours isn't covered either (though my insurance company says they're working on it, which is great and all, but it doesn't help me now!), we decided to budget for the expense ourselves because I don't have any family here and I feel like the support will be worth it. I always thought my mother would be with me for the birth but she can't make it so ... this is my runner up choice. SOME BITTERNESS EXISTS ABOUT THIS
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Jul 13, 2016 20:01
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Rurutia posted:Doulas aren't covered under my insurance so I'm hesitant to get one. Having a doula was super valuable to me. BUT even if you don't have on do make a birth plan and make sure every nurse and doctor that sees you reads the plan. Earth Mama Angel Baby has a free template on their website as an example but many hospitals will have them or doulas may have one as well.
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Jul 13, 2016 20:18
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Sharks Below posted:Ours isn't covered either (though my insurance company says they're working on it, which is great and all, but it doesn't help me now!), we decided to budget for the expense ourselves because I don't have any family here and I feel like the support will be worth it. I always thought my mother would be with me for the birth but she can't make it so ... this is my runner up choice. SOME BITTERNESS EXISTS ABOUT THIS Awwww. =/ Yeah my family's here so that's good. My grandparents are making a trip specially for me down here. Funhilde posted:Having a doula was super valuable to me. BUT even if you don't have on do make a birth plan and make sure every nurse and doctor that sees you reads the plan. Earth Mama Angel Baby has a free template on their website as an example but many hospitals will have them or doulas may have one as well. I'm not planning on a birth plan write up, but my husband has been trained and coached extensively. The plan is for nothing to be done with his approval, and he'll check with me for everything that we didn't talk about but we've talked about everything super important. Mostly though, I'm pretty comfortable with the OB practice and hospital we're with. They're very up to date with latest research and best practices as they're a top 3 OB hospital.
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Jul 13, 2016 20:42
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Rurutia posted:I'm not planning on a birth plan write up, but my husband has been trained and coached extensively. The plan is for nothing to be done with his approval, and he'll check with me for everything that we didn't talk about but we've talked about everything super important. Mostly though, I'm pretty comfortable with the OB practice and hospital we're with. They're very up to date with latest research and best practices as they're a top 3 OB hospital. I feel the same way. I really trust my hospital staff and so does my doula which is awesome. She couldn't find a backup (stupid Christmas baby) and I said it was fine, if she can't come to the birth I know I'm in good hands. Part of the reason we felt like a doula would be really helpful is that my husband is protective to the point of being not helpful sometimes. When I kick my foot on something and exclaim, he comes running in a panic. I feel like when I am really screaming and swearing, he will be beside himself  It's very sweet but I wanted someone who would be able to reassure him, too!
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Jul 13, 2016 21:06
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Sharks Below posted:I feel the same way. I really trust my hospital staff and so does my doula which is awesome. She couldn't find a backup (stupid Christmas baby) and I said it was fine, if she can't come to the birth I know I'm in good hands. Part of the reason we felt like a doula would be really helpful is that my husband is protective to the point of being not helpful sometimes. When I kick my foot on something and exclaim, he comes running in a panic. I feel like when I am really screaming and swearing, he will be beside himself Yeah, my husband's a robot so I figure he'd be good for it.
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Jul 13, 2016 21:14
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Can I add to epidural chat? The urge to labor non-laying down is a really deep down instinctual thing. I had to lie on the bed for a while when they couldn't get monitors on the kid. It felt AWFUL. My very swift labor completely stalled at that point. All I wanted to do was squat or stand or sit. When you have an epidural, you can't do anything but labor on your back. Do not underestimate the value of being able to move around. It's not a convenience thing, it's definitely your body telling you THIS IS THE EASIEST WAY TO GET THIS OVER WITH. Also, everyone forgets birth preferences in the heat of the moment. Write them down. Don't be married to them cause poo poo may change but it's really good for the staff and your doula and your very stressed and possibly exhausted partner to have to refer to.
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Jul 13, 2016 21:27
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I think there are different regulations so to speak what you can or cannot do after an epidural? Because here you have to lay down 30 minutes after the epidural is inserted with a cuff measuring your BP. If during that 30 minutes your BP doesn't drop too badly you can get up and move again as much as you wish.
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Jul 13, 2016 21:40
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ClownBabby posted:When you have an epidural, you can't do anything but labor on your back. ? I was told that you can still labor on all 4's or squatting with an epidural as long as you stay on the bed. Do you mean the chances of being able to do so are really low?
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Jul 13, 2016 21:41
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Rurutia posted:Awwww. =/ Yeah my family's here so that's good. My grandparents are making a trip specially for me down here. It's just a checkbox instead of anything written. I suggest having it as back up. The labor room can get hectic and having certain directives on a piece of paper really helps. For example I had that I didn't want to be pressured or asked about an epidural. Even having on paper that your husband is to be asked first may be super helpful.
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Jul 13, 2016 21:46
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Funhilde posted:It's just a checkbox instead of anything written. I suggest having it as back up. The labor room can get hectic and having certain directives on a piece of paper really helps. For example I had that I didn't want to be pressured or asked about an epidural. Even having on paper that your husband is to be asked first may be super helpful. Main reason I chose not to do one and just coach my husband extensively is that I've been told by multiple people it's a waste of time and that people don't reference it or check it, lol. Also the pressuring thing is important to me, so that's why everything is going to go through him, I told him that I needed him to basically be my shield. He takes this pretty seriously so I trust he will do well. I might have one for the hell of it, but honestly I've seen them and I just didn't care for them either. edit You're right though, maybe a sign with "Ask my husband, not me." would be a good idea. Rurutia fucked around with this message at 21:58 on Jul 13, 2016 |
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Jul 13, 2016 21:55
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