Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Locked thread
KataraniSword
Apr 22, 2008

but at least I don't have
a MLP or MSPA avatar.
I am my own man.

Nidoking posted:

As I understood it, whatever network they were airing on (Fox Kids, I think?) wanted Sakura and Shaoran to be more like partners than rivals like they actually were, likely because they didn't think a show with a female lead and no male lead would work for American children. Shaoran doesn't even show up until well into the first season, and there's not a lot of working together until some time after that. So they had to rearrange episodes, splice bits of other episodes together, and probably change most of the dialogue to create the narrative they wanted. They also undoubtedly wanted to remove some of the romantic subtext, since almost every bit of it is between couples that would raise flags with children's television censors.

Yeah, they wanted Shaoran to have equal billing with Sakura despite the source material being named after and explicitly starring the latter. So they aired Shaoran's intro episode as the "first" episode, did a bunch of poo poo out of order to show them both as "male lead" and "female lead" and were confused that nothing made sense. Because cartoons don't have continuity between episodes, right? They're all one-shots! :saddowns:

Also, yeah, they chopped out anything at all that could have even brushed shoulders with homosexual context which, if you've seen anything by CLAMP, meant they had to censor roughly 90% of the show. On the plus, they could use all that empty space from chopped content to instead air previous episodes as expository flashbacks! :downs:

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Haifisch
Nov 13, 2010

Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!



Taco Defender

Waffleman_ posted:

I like how there's this quaint fantasy village complete with temple in 1990s Canada.
This obviously takes place in the same universe as AA's Japanifornia. Canada just didn't get as much urban development as Los Tokyo.

Cathode Raymond
Dec 30, 2015

My antenna is telling me that you're probably wrong about this.
Soiled Meat

Justin_Brett posted:

Did they really have the villain of the chapter just knock herself out while retreating?

Not all villains can be success stories :colbert:

claw game handjob
Mar 27, 2007

pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

Cathode Raymond posted:

Not all villains can be success stories :colbert:

I actually like to think the dopiest villain in this game is the best by miles. We'll meet her soon.

berryjon
May 30, 2011

I have an invasion to go to.
I can only presume the Temple was a Timmies that was still under construction, and the Ancient God they're talking about was Gordie Howe.

Waffleman_
Jan 20, 2011


I don't wanna I don't wanna I don't wanna I don't wanna!!!

berryjon posted:

I can only presume the Temple was a Timmies that was still under construction, and the Ancient God they're talking about was Gordie Howe.

gently caress yeah, Makoto, let's go for a rip.

Alligator Pie
Apr 26, 2008

Give away the green grass, Give away the sky

berryjon posted:

I can only presume the Temple was a Timmies that was still under construction, and the Ancient God they're talking about was Gordie Howe.

Lies. Timmy's are not constructed, they spontaneously materialize from the void so they can start collecting souls in exchange for donuts.

Aces High
Mar 26, 2010

Nah! A little chocolate will do




Nidoking posted:

As I understood it, whatever network they were airing on (Fox Kids, I think?) wanted Sakura and Shaoran to be more like partners than rivals like they actually were, likely because they didn't think a show with a female lead and no male lead would work for American children. Shaoran doesn't even show up until well into the first season, and there's not a lot of working together until some time after that. So they had to rearrange episodes, splice bits of other episodes together, and probably change most of the dialogue to create the narrative they wanted. They also undoubtedly wanted to remove some of the romantic subtext, since almost every bit of it is between couples that would raise flags with children's television censors.

I do find all of this weird because when I got older and started watching the series again I kept hearing people talk poo poo about this dub, saying it was aired out of order and I was like "what? are you telling me the first episode of the series isn't her dropping a baton and poo poo? that was the first episode I saw when it first aired". But apparently only in the US did they have that 39 episodes poo poo, in Canada we got the whole series from the start

Lady Naga
Apr 25, 2008

Voyons Donc!

Aces High posted:

I do find all of this weird because when I got older and started watching the series again I kept hearing people talk poo poo about this dub, saying it was aired out of order and I was like "what? are you telling me the first episode of the series isn't her dropping a baton and poo poo? that was the first episode I saw when it first aired". But apparently only in the US did they have that 39 episodes poo poo, in Canada we got the whole series from the start

Canada got a lot of its own dubs, though coincidentally enough we still only got DIC Sailor Moon.

BioEnchanted
Aug 9, 2011

He plays for the dreamers that forgot how to dream, and the lovers that forgot how to love.
I think the thing I like most about it is it's revealed later in the series that their is no relationship between Yukito and either Li or Sakura. Li and Sakura aren't crushing on him, he is secretly, and without his knowledge, a disguise for the other guardian of the Clow Cards, The Moon Guardian Yue (Keroberos being the Sun Guardian). They are drawn to his ~moon energy~ Also, Mei LIng being his sister is also a fabrication that makes their relationship way creepier - She is Jealous of Li spending so much time with Sakura because she is his arranged bride.

Aces High
Mar 26, 2010

Nah! A little chocolate will do




Lady Naga posted:

Canada got a lot of its own dubs, though coincidentally enough we still only got DIC Sailor Moon.

well considering 2/3 of the VAs were Canadian I mean, why would we not just keep that?

And I will hear no more disparaging of the DBZ Ocean dub, they gave that series the seriousness it deserved, once we ignore the early episode "passing to the other dimension" and stuff

Alligator Pie
Apr 26, 2008

Give away the green grass, Give away the sky

Lady Naga posted:

Canada got a lot of its own dubs, though coincidentally enough we still only got DIC Sailor Moon.

I can't remember, what are some other dubs we got that were Canadian? I know the Ranma ones had lots of Canadian voice actors but I'm not sure about the others.

Waffleman_
Jan 20, 2011


I don't wanna I don't wanna I don't wanna I don't wanna!!!

Cheese Pain posted:

I can't remember, what are some other dubs we got that were Canadian? I know the Ranma ones had lots of Canadian voice actors but I'm not sure about the others.

A bit more modern, but Black Lagoon and Death Note were Canadian dubs. Revy's VA is one of the sisters on Johnny Test!

Lady Naga
Apr 25, 2008

Voyons Donc!
All three versions of Dragonball got several.

Glazius
Jul 22, 2007

Hail all those who are able,
any mouse can,
any mouse will,
but the Guard prevail.

Clapping Larry
Venus is completely used to adventuring on her own, though. Maybe she beat everybody offscreen and her chapter is going to be all flashback?

Echo Cian
Jun 16, 2011

Man, this game was my first real exposure to Sailor Moon besides catching a handful of episodes of the dub when I was a kid. I just figured the stuff that didn't make sense would have if I knew the show, and I enjoyed it as its own weird thing (because I had as much of a concept of game balance at the time as the programmers did). Interesting to learn that isn't the case, but that the series still does get insane.

I'm enjoying the translation notes, that's always interesting.

also ww6011db9 if I missed anyone. Drops is fun so far...until I run out of hearts retrying the same level for the fifth time. Phone games! :argh:

Rabbi Raccoon
Mar 31, 2009

I stabbed you dude!
Man, watching the original dub makes me appreciate just how great Terri Hawkes was. She completely nailed Serena.

Julet Esqu
May 6, 2007




I would like to drop sailors, too! But all the randos the game suggests I befriend are too lame to accept my invites. Please help! wwec73df5


Also, fun LP. I played a little of this but I must not have gotten past the Mars section because I don't remember Jupiter's chapter at all.

Ryushikaze
Mar 5, 2013

Waffleman_ posted:

A bit more modern, but Black Lagoon and Death Note were Canadian dubs. Revy's VA is one of the sisters on Johnny Test!

I am not imagining a much more violent and hilarious version of Johnny Test.

Thank you for this mental image.

Kurui Reiten
Apr 24, 2010

You people are monsters for this.

ww50e2f51

Plz help me fellow sailors

Alligator Pie
Apr 26, 2008

Give away the green grass, Give away the sky
I tried adding more of you and was told my friend list is full. I'm happy but also sad. :confuoot:

I look forward to having a zillion extra lives for the Princess Serenity event.

kefkafloyd
Jun 8, 2006

What really knocked me out
Was her cheap sunglasses
My friend list is almost full too. :(

Also Venus' chapter has my favorite contrivance in the whole game. :allears:

Pizdec
Dec 10, 2012

Echo Cian posted:

I'm enjoying the translation notes, that's always interesting.
I've just caught up with the thread and I'm echoing this, I actually wanted to request some from the Mars and Jupiter chapters because it seems like they somehow fell even deeper into the usagi hole there. I love translation trivia, especially when there are depths of awfulness to be uncovered like in this case.

Cathode Raymond
Dec 30, 2015

My antenna is telling me that you're probably wrong about this.
Soiled Meat
They cap your friends list? These freemium games are absolutely brutal.

Geizt
Dec 10, 2014



Most gacha based games put a cap on your friends list until you get more levels/ranks/whatever they call them. Don't know why, but probably to make sure that everyone can't mooch off that one guy with the stupid powerful thing that's been playing since the game started.

KataraniSword
Apr 22, 2008

but at least I don't have
a MLP or MSPA avatar.
I am my own man.

Also because friends can either send you things passively (friend point bonuses for common gachas and mooching off super-powered friend units), actively (daily item gifts) or both.

You're a stupid newbie who can use those things so of course they want to limit them until they're effectively worthless.

100 HOGS AGREE
Oct 13, 2007
Grimey Drawer
it's because they want you to spend money on the game

ComicsandSlushies
Feb 22, 2013
I am suddenly really glad the Sailor Moon game I grew up with was the 3d mini game thing, I remember playing it a lot actually I can't remember much about it though other than the dress up game part.

Also if we're still sharing Sailor Moon Drops friend codes mine is ww895d64c

RMZXAnarchy
Sep 9, 2011

*Insert Sailor Jupiter joke here*
Did I jump into this right as best girl's solo chapter starts? I could never get past that godawful solo Mercury segment despite having multiple copies laying around (the closest I got was playing on mobile).

I do actually own a multitude of the old SM games, both the strange PC Engine CD games (which I can't play, mostly because the emulator doesn't let me.), the first SNES beat-em-up (which can be stupid hard because enemies can shred you to bits easily.) and Another Story (CIB even!)

They're not masterpieces but its fun to play as your favorite characters beating up monsters.

Pyroi
Aug 17, 2013

gay elf noises

RMZXAnarchy posted:

Did I jump into this right as best girl's solo chapter starts?

No, Jupiter's chapter just ended.

RMZXAnarchy
Sep 9, 2011

*Insert Sailor Jupiter joke here*

Pyroi posted:

No, Jupiter's chapter just ended.

Oh, dammit. Well Venus is next, right? She's a solid second best.

Edit: wow venus doesn't even get a fun adventure in the desert? That's embarassing.

Dariusknight
Jul 8, 2012
Aww damnit, I find this thread and then you all ignite my love for all things Sailor Moon again. I had put away all my Sailor Moon merchandise I had proudly displayed in my room when I got married, and this thread has me installing them in my 4-year old daughter's room and starting her first on the original DIC dubs.

My wife hates me now...

BTW Sailor Business is awesome, I listen to it on my way to work.

I also drop Sailors, feel free to add me: ww50c2948

claw game handjob
Mar 27, 2007

pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING


I want you all to know that I seriously considered whether I would just skip this whole chapter and insert some of Ishtar's scenes later as "flashback", because it sucks. However, a friend who is an incredible Venus fan insisted that I not skip her favorite character's chapter. Instead, I'm going to poo poo on it openly. You should assume I am abridging this dialogue heavily unless I take care to point out "This is actually what the patch says here" at some point.

We fell in a hole last time, bee-tee-dubs. You pick up the stone and there's a sudden earthquake that drops you on your rear end just in time for the title card. I cut that part out.



Please note this is not an emulator glitch or anything, by the way. Artemis and Venus have a discussion for 3 or 4 lines before we're allowed to see the village itself.



Welcome to the Village of the Damned Too Many Dicks, because there are no women in Rias Village, so there is a lengthy scene to begin with where a bunch of identical horndogs try to pick us up, complete with some Benny Hill wordless pratfalls from Venus/Artemis in places.



I feel like I need to point out that while Luna is naggy in the way a mother is, Artemis is your feline stern father who says maybe two words of praise every year to you.

And he drinks. Heavily. Because "Let's duck into a rando's house" is a terrible plan, Artemis.



So there's a guy in the house, which makes sense even if this whole village doesn't, and I actually considered giving Darcy a very "Gaston" vibe before I realized he spoke to us twice.

Yes, Venus is going to fall in love with him, or at least get weirdly romantic.



Anyway, we're trapped in the village until we go to the party that this village is throwing because a lady literally fell out of the sky. I just want to point out that this line is where I'm finally given control of my character again. It's 74 screenshots into a chapter that I captured in 408. You missed nothing by my skipping the dialogue.



One of my absolute least favorite time-wasters in an old RPG is the "you need to talk to everyone in the village to make an event happen" flag. Let me stay at the inn, or visit a shop, or just go to the place I need to be and go "Yep, let's start that thing" and not make me waste my human time like the characters themselves are doing. In this case, I have to hear every single fella in town go "I want to own you" in some way or another, until finally after the last one Artemis goes "Hey, yeah, let's go to that party!"



Unsurprisingly, a village full of dipshit dudes can't dance, which is why everyone is just spinning in circles on pedestals.



Meanwhile, Artemis, who wouldn't know fun if it bit him on the rear end, is griping that the woman who looks like she's chained to a dais like Leia in Jabba's palace is having "too much fun" in this concerthall of cocks. Venus goes "Shut up and when they all get too drunk or tired we'll slip out the back."



And I literally mean "the back", because we have to go up a floor to leave, there are dancing dudes in our way if we want to use the front door.



Surprise! It's Ishtar and a goon squad! And a statue of Kunzite. Actual dialogue, minus 500 "-samas":

I don't care about anyone else, just kill whoever gets in your way. Ishtar shall get the stone and deliver it to Apsu~ (heart)
Stop this right now!
(pouting) What? Who are YOU?!
I am the Sailor-suited Soldier of Love and Justice, Sailor Venus, calling on you now! Understand this - Sailor Venus shall always be around to stop evil people from doing as they please!
(Ishtar throws a tantrum*.)
WHAT?! You!! This person imposing on me is annoying! Everyone! Do it pleeeease!
(The four youma surround us.)



Enter the battle of the palette swaps. One multi-target attack will wipe this crew, and we get an instant level-up for our trouble.



HOW? It looks like you're still here! The stone may have been stolen, but the day isn't over yet! Ooh, you IDIOT!
(Ishtar turns around and punches the statue in a rage, shoving it around.)
Oops, that did it...
(The room begins flashing a bunch of lights in a fashion that's a bitch to capture in screengrabs. It then goes pitch dark, where...)



(...Ishtar is sealed in a barrier of her own making, and for some reason Venus is turned to stone while Artemis is not. loving cat magic.)


Oh no, they've all turned to stone... (She looks around.) Oh well, it's okay~ That annoying girl has turned to stone too! (heart) It's weird, you know you get what you deserve. But I'm worried... if we don't find the person who has Kunzite's stone, the King will get well again. I'm no good at finding what I'm looking for...

(Ishtar teleports away, and because this plot is supremely nonsensical, Venus turns back to normal because... well, it's dumb. We'll get there, the game doesn't explain yet.)



If I wanted to be crass, I'd make a 'grind grind' joke here, but no, apparently in an even more horrifying scenario that wasn't explored in the 30 seconds or so Venus was a statue, you can hear everyone moving inside their stone prisons. They're all conscious, unable to get free, and somehow alive.



Because this chapter makes no sense on any level, the spell that petrified everyone affected two idiots outside of the village as well, so we can't just walk to the end of the chapter (and my other Topaz accessory).



The enemies we'll fight for a majority of this chapter (because despite this subchapter using the most sprites, it's also got the most palette swapping thus far) are:



Akumuda, a hypnotic siren who, should she put you to sleep, will pull a sword out of her skull to try and finish the job. Fun fact: it's skilled enough to fight Tuxedo Mask to a standstill! Her name is a pun on "nightmare" ("akumu") in Japanese, apparently.



Meanwhile, Giwaku (whose name apparently literally means "doubt/distrust", not even a pun) is a mistress of illusions, except if you try them on Sailor Mercury, because she'll pretend it works and then loving ice you while you gloat. Don't try faking out the person with the computer visor and the 300 IQ, kids!



There's an extra "gently caress you" in this chapter, because everyone in Rias Village is stone now, so... while you can interact with the shopkeeper and buy things...



...the innkeeper has no trigger on him. You have to buy items to heal, no rest for you, player. C'mon, programmers. That's just lovely to the highest degree, especially in the initial 'grind your rear end up some levels' portion of the chapter.



There's a castle here, but unlike a lot of earlier chapters, I can't go in and streamline the grinding right now, Artemis will be a buzzkill and tell me, a superpowered heroine of love and justice, that it's too evil, and I'll catch my death of cold.



It's hard to tell currently, because the Topaz Bracelet is altering our stat spread (with a heavy attack/defense boost), but Venus is basically all Evade while being slow as poo poo. Her attack score rises a little, but Evade's her good stat and everything else suffers. As a result, all grinding this chapter is focused on one goal: "We will fight the next boss as soon as we can start getting the first hit on the random encounters". There are actually a lot of bosses in this chapter for some reason.



As you probably guessed, Village #2 in this subchapter is composed entirely of ladies, because of course it is. Everyone here knows our name and the trigger to continue on is "try and enter the temple at the north of this village".

Now that we're in the final story of chapter two, let me just say: holy poo poo chapter two overstays its welcome by breaking everyone up but forcing them to run through identical gauntlets of "spawn in one village, grind a little to go to the second, enter the actual dungeon, grind again, fight a Bizarro Lady, leave". Each one twists this slightly (Mercury lets you skip village 2 entirely, Mars has the weird empty tower and ghosts, Jupiter has bizarre, unfinished sub-dungeons, and Venus has a bunch of bosses to battle), but it's the same thing over and over. You wanna know why this update took so long? It's hard to get enthusiastic over "...gently caress, AGAIN?!", the plot arc.

Guess what: the one after this may take a few days too because I have to do this a-loving-gain.



When we go to the temple, Mary Poppins here will lead us to Verin Sedai**, which is dumb as hell because she's going to lead us right back to this temple in three lines of dialogue. This chapter is a goddamn grandmaster of wasting your time in new and infuriating ways.



Verin and everyone in the village knows who we are because of the fuckoff-huge golden statue of Venus on OF COURSE IT'S A CLAM, YOU KNEW IT WOULD BE.

The short version is "we were here in a past life" and of course a tiny village inside a cavern beneath the goddamn desert would remember that for millenia, because what else is there to do when you can never see the sun? Seriously, I'm waiting until we get to the end, but this chapter makes no sense. But hey! Now we can go to the castle to the north and ask the witch there for help fixing Rias Village.

This town is called Sariel Village, should you give a poo poo. We will never return.



On the inside, the castle (which they name "Zagsen") is barren aside from a single breed of enemy encounter.





Dogba is not a very, very fetishy translation of Dilbert into Japanese, but an animal trainer of evil who wields a whip. Apparently, and this is the most interesting thing about her, a weird typo changed her name in this game, to a set of characters that Google translates as "Dock bar" when I enter them. So I guess that explains the surreal name the translators went with.



When we reach the top of the castle, it turns out the witch is a ghost. I like to pretend Venus is being incredibly sarcastic above, because Artemis' response is "Oh, stop, you've got this."



Now like. I want you to just look at that screenshot of the ghost in white linens above, and then go "How the gently caress did a ghost with glasses turn into a fishwoman-naga-medusa beast?" It's a hell of a thing. Not a hell of a thing: this fight. One Venus Wink Chain Sword*** and she croaks. Which maybe a fish-headed lady does? I don't know.

So at this point, we're going to learn why Venus turned back to normal in an instant. Guess what: this is gonna be super stupid.



A magically booby-trapped statue of a dude past-Venus might have made out with at a party still has a stiffy for her, so it returned her to normal.

Anyway, I want to just highlight this next chunk of the conversation, as I find it hilarious.

You'll have to use your holy light to unfreeze the statues.
Holy light? What's that?
The holy light you possess which can cause earthquakes.

Wait for it, this gets better...

I have a holy light? (She turns to Artemis, and both make a confused shrug.) I don't... what holy light?
................
That's it! Your Crescent Beam attack! The powers you possess as a Sailor Senshi weren't originally meant for destruction.

...

pfffffft yeah right

Crescent Beam is a laser. It does not cause earthquakes. In fact, when we use it, it's literally going to pierce that statue, so what the gently caress is this mess all about. Also the Scouts were the Princess' bodyguards, so... yes, yes their powers were indeed meant for destruction.



Anyhow, there's another midboss Youma here, so while we're here, lemme go over why I like Ishtar so much: she's totally Sailor V-era Venus. She's a hyperactive flake who fell rear end-backwards into her job and is going to flail her way through it no matter the results because gently caress you I'm gorgeous.



"Oh poo poo, she dodged a statue I threw at her? DO SOMETHING, HENCHMAN!" is presented in the same tone as Minako would hurl Artemis at a foe and try to run away. Which she did once.



This dude is Generic-rear end Boss Man, so you better believe there's nothing to discuss here.



I just want to reiterate that our non-earthquake, totally-destructive power is a laser that goes through this statue. But it de-stones everyone, leading to yet another scene of the entire town trying to get into Venus' pants as we go see Darcy.

I really hate this chapter. Chapter 2, I mean, not just Venus' subchapter.



I was not joking when I said Venus got all hung up on a dude we only have to talk to once prior to this, by the way. She gets legit mad that Cat Dad goes "We need to go back to Japan, Mina."

At this point I am going to lighten the mood from my constant parade of "gently caress THIS" with this brief interlude.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jdW21QSUfEw

Thanks, Mina.



So we end the chapter with... we're basically done actually. This final area has no random encounters at all, but we're going to Venus' Ark, which is a thing that features nowhere else in the series but I guess we needed a way for us to get out of this underground cavern so she now has a space ark with a teleporter.

I want to point out that when that teleporter is active, both Artemis and Venus just float upwards, unmoving, in sync like Poochy, it's incredibly poor animation.



And finally, finally we get Venus' second accessory. Also, a fun note: see that sideways staircase there? This game doesn't know what the gently caress to do with it so if we engage with it, it takes away control and forces us into a cutscene to climb/descend it. Technical prowess!



One of the other chests contained a Red Rose, which is hilarious because it means in this universe, Tuxedo Mask tossing a flower is a party cure, which is how Sailor Moon always gets up and whoops rear end afterwards.



Despite the fact that we're clearly in the control room here (and despite the fact that we're not going to fly this thing home, making this entire inside segment moot...), we have to actually walk into...



...an entirely blank room to start the final cutscene of the chapter!



So we walk out and Ishtar makes a completely sane comment: yes, Ishtar, we did, because why not.

Hey, this Venus-sama's place isn't a cave****.
(baffled) A cave? Isn't this a cavern? (She looks around, and notices...) ...ah! It's the stone! HEY YOU! You're the person who stole the stone!



So, at this point... I legitimately think it's impossible to lose this fight without trying. If you got to this point, you're strong enough to take her. With the added power of the Topaz Tiara, we loving curb-stomp her. But even without that, she has no special attacks, just like Jupiter's boss. I cannot tell if these last two fights are meant to show how out of their league these two are, or if it's half-assed laziness.



And now, Ishtar's tragic origin story, wherein remember this cutscene from earlier? She spends it going "Nabu, what the hell is up with you? You're a trip." Clearly, these two aren't even the closest friends, from the sound of it, but...



...whereas the scene cut off with Nabu flying away earlier, this time Ishtar follows her into the beam and begins screaming and flailing.

KYAAAAAAAAaaaa! Ishtar's body is floating too... Help meeeeeeee
(scoffs) This one... oh well. She'll do as well.

That's right... Ishtar is literally Usagi or Minako, a random blonde just sucked up into a conflict greater than her and given superpowers.

Ishtar is the best villain in this game.



(Ishtar teleports off in a huff, spouting a misquoted aphorism... which is also a very Minako thing to do.)
Well... I've opened my eyes to my true power. Until the day I move this ark... farewell.
(Without missing a beat) You know, if Sailor Moon got on this ark, I think she could power it pretty easily.
OH IS THAT SO, ARTEMIS?!

But since we can't power this thing...



...we just teleport back to Japan. Meaning we didn't need to go inside or have that fight at all.

So now that we're at the end, let me walk you through how stupid this plot is.

  • First off: we have the stone the entire time. At any point we could leave were it not for the whole "we're deep loving underground" aspect. Which leads to...
  • How the gently caress does this society exist? These are mole people. They literally have no way to see the sun, so we're trapped in a colony of underground pale mutants who segregate by gender, and occasionally I guess some teens sneak out to gently caress new mole-babies into existence?
  • What the gently caress was up with that ghost castle? The two villages were twin shrines/cults to Venus and Kunzite, but seriously, why was the ghost witch there at all?!
  • How did a statue somehow have a hard-on for Venus and enough sentience to recognize and heal her, but not enough to re-trigger the trap after Ishtar lowered her shield? This should be apparent by itself. C'mon.
  • Why did we even walk into the barren ark if all we needed was the teleporter on deck?
  • Why does Darcy exist and why did they feel like we needed some wanker to have Minako crush on after he said two words to her?




And guess loving what! I get to do another loving round of grinding someone up, except this time, it's a person who isn't even level 6 yet!

* When I describe moments like this, you should basically pretend Ishtar is overemoting and flailing and flipping her poo poo like she was Kefka, because she shares that entire level of being overanimated for comedic effect.
** They actually call her "Verna-sama" but gently caress you she's totally Brown Ajah.
*** This is an actual attack!
**** I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THIS IS SUPPOSED TO MEAN, but if I try turning it into something sane, nothing else makes sense in this scene, so...

Pizdec
Dec 10, 2012
I, Pizdec, thought at first that this was "Killlllllll" and Ishtar went full-on Xena on us. :black101:


Also, what's this about Venus musclin' in on Haruka's turf? :argh:

RMZXAnarchy
Sep 9, 2011

*Insert Sailor Jupiter joke here*
Oh cripes, a full-on Chibiusa chapter? Doesn't she have like... Joke attacks in the actual series? How the gently caress does she actually fight?

Really hoping that's the end of the past-life nonsense. I've never been a fan of that aspect of the series and was super glad it became irrelevant starting with R.

FractalSandwich
Apr 25, 2010

END ME SCOOB posted:

**** I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THIS IS SUPPOSED TO MEAN, but if I try turning it into something sane, nothing else makes sense in this scene, so...
If I understand the Japanese text correctly, this is what's actually going on in that scene: Ishtar actually says the opposite: "How did you know I was here?". Venus tries to play it cool but screws up a figure of speech, as she does. My very elegant and professional translation of what she says is "Ha! You must think I'm blind as a bird!", to which Ishtar of course says, "You mean a bat?", and then she sees the stupid rock, and then they fight.

Waffleman_
Jan 20, 2011


I don't wanna I don't wanna I don't wanna I don't wanna!!!

I'm gonna say that when someone comes into my room unannounced.

This Waffleman-sama's place isn't a cave!

FractalSandwich
Apr 25, 2010
I don't even know where they pulled that "place" from.

Cathode Raymond
Dec 30, 2015

My antenna is telling me that you're probably wrong about this.
Soiled Meat

Waffleman_ posted:

I'm gonna say that when someone comes into my room unannounced.

This Waffleman-sama's place isn't a cave!

When should we be declaring what is and is not a cave? I have never given it any thought before but because I do not tell people what is and is not a cave I may have left them confused. I guess right now is a good time to start. The place where I am is not a cave. The place where you are is probably not a cave either, although I cannot know for sure.

With that out of the way, who thought that this extended single-character quagmire was a good idea? I think they probably should have given Moon her own chapter and left it at that. These things just go on and on. Also, Ishtar was hired into Evil Inc because she happened to fall into a teleporter beam?

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Rainuwastaken
Oct 30, 2012

Another blue ribbon for Hecarim.

Cathode Raymond posted:

The place where I am is not a cave. The place where you are is probably not a cave either, although I cannot know for sure.

Considering how full of damp, smelly creatures it is, SA probably does count as a cave.

  • Locked thread