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   "If this doesn't make you cry, you're not a feminist!!!!!" Well, it never happened, so I'm not gonna cry about it. Guess I'm not a feminist anymore. It's been real.
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Jul 22, 2016 12:33
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"Well I'm well endowed"  can't let people wondering whether or not I got a small penis in my imaginary conversation.
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Jul 22, 2016 12:57
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And even if it happened (it didn't), it seems like that ended fairly well all things considered. Dude didn't get raped, dude didn't sleep with crazy lady, and besides a brief blow-up over text which can easily be ignored, really nothing bad happened at all. The only sad part is that the person is trying to equate someone angrily texting about why they didn't gently caress to, you know, actually being raped.
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Jul 22, 2016 13:18
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lol if you haven't spoken to enough women that you've had that exact conversation.
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Jul 22, 2016 14:49
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfelqZpapZA Also that was definitely written by a dude with zero understanding of what women are expected to do to "get ready" daily, let alone for a special occasion
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Jul 22, 2016 14:50
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That man owed that woman sex after all that effort she put in.
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Jul 22, 2016 15:18
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quote:[EPIC RANT] My hairdresser is pregnant... (self.childfree)
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Jul 22, 2016 19:23
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Yes, I too carry around alcohol with me everywhere I go, why do you ask?
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Jul 22, 2016 19:33
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Furia posted:Yes, I too carry around alcohol with me everywhere I go, why do you ask? Have you seen 2016? Lol if you don't.
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Jul 22, 2016 19:40
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"My hairdresser was being annoying about her future baby, so I asked my dealer to bring me an eight ball of cocaine and had a binge party right in front of her to spite her. Then I shot up some heroin and asked her if she could fill her void despite not shooting up herself"
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Jul 22, 2016 19:42
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Also the hairdresser can consume all those things in like 3 months.
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Jul 22, 2016 20:40
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Someone get me the name of that sushi place -- that's some quick delivery.
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Jul 22, 2016 21:47
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Stroop There It Is posted:Also that was definitely written by a dude with zero understanding of what women are expected to do to "get ready" daily, let alone for a special occasion I liked the indignation of having to shave her legs, like that's the worst thing the guy who wrote that could think of.
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Jul 22, 2016 23:44
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hyperhazard posted:I liked the indignation of having to shave her legs, like that's the worst thing the guy who wrote that could think of. You say that like you think this rear end has a clue about women. He's probably never spoken to one in the wild.
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Jul 23, 2016 02:02
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Khazar-khum posted:You say that like you think this rear end has a clue about women. He's probably never spoken to one in the wild. There's an early episode of Grey's Anatomy where Izzy is upset that Karev didn't kiss her at the end of her date, and her specific complaint is that she spent time shaving her legs. That's what OP's story distinctly reminds me of.
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Jul 23, 2016 02:45
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I've probably said it before, but those r/childfree people have got to be among the most annoyingly self-absorbed shitheads in the entire goddamn world.
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Jul 23, 2016 02:46
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kimbo305 posted:Someone get me the name of that sushi place -- that's some quick delivery. Do you know how long a visit to the hair salon takes?
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Jul 23, 2016 03:14
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Real thing that happened:  "my hairdresser just got pregnant and, as a hairdresser you're familiar with does, talks to me about her life (hence her pregnancy). I spent the next 3 hours chatting friendly with her while, in my head, fuming, came up with different things I *could* do to punish this baby-haver and about how I'm going to post on the internet about them. At the end of the appointment I smiled and thanked her. Then I went home to post on childfree!"
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Jul 23, 2016 03:20
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Jul 23, 2016 05:56
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Ytlaya posted:I can understand someplace with the density of Manhattan, but I hear this sort of thing from people who sound like they live in more or less suburban areas. It's probably just a coincidence that I haven't seen any yet (or that they've seen so many people). I'm right between a uni campus and a big-rear end pub that serves mostly uni students, so my area is thick with greasy nerds at all times. Now they're attracted to my place like a Venomoth to a Talonflame.
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Jul 23, 2016 07:12
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Tonyquote:This Troper went to see an amateur performance of West Side Story at her local theatre with her family. It had just gotten to the scene where Tony gets shot in the back as he's running into Maria's arms. It's supposed to be a highly moving moment. However someone in the cast had thought it'd be a good idea to use a real gun (filled with blanks, obviously) or at the very least a very realistic fake one. The noise of the discharge was so loud that half the cinema jumped out of their seats and burst out laughing when we were supposed to be in cascades of tears. Pokemon quote:[[Ronfar This troper's]] high school has an event called "Class Night" in which some of the graduating seniors put on sketches for the rest of the graduating class to watch. Being one of the more "well-known" students in his high school, he ended up being in many of the sketches. As usual, this kind of thing is filled with in-jokes that are only funny to people who know what's going on, but here are some highlights anyway: Leg quote:This troper was in a production of The Pirates of Penzance in high school. Our master carpenter, while not much of a singer, was a student with a prosthetic leg from a childhood accident. Our director agreed to let him join the chorus for the opening scene upon the revelation that this student had made himself a genuine wooden leg that he could actually wear! Crowning Momentof Funny for the show, and a CMOA for the student. Song quote:This Troper vividly remembers one of the shining moments of middle school. It was after lunch, and she as walking with a rather melancholy friend. In an attempt to cheer her buddy up, she began singing "I Believe I Can Fly" by R.Kelly. Surrounding students caught on and before the second verse, the entire hallway was singing it, in perfect unison. They didn't sing the entire song but, drat...
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Jul 23, 2016 09:57
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MizPiz posted:There was that one time a bunch of people crossed the street into Central Park because something came up. Most of these "dearths of 20-somethings" are just two or three small groups of friends hanging out. This is something I recorded the other day at the park in my city, while biking. https://www.dropbox.com/s/e61rqtskq960h09/VID-20160721-WA0001.mp4?dl=0 There are at least three places in my city, that I've seen, that have this amount of people since the release of the game. Fun fact, a girl on a small motorcycle got a ticket on this park for driving her motorcycle while trying to catch a Pokémon (as it counts for texting and driving). I hope the Pokémon was worth the €160. I'm just disappointed the game seems to be about going to a place, stand still, and look at your phone. It'd be nicer if Pokémon were everywhere, randomly. Like in the game.
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Jul 23, 2016 10:17
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Postal Parcel posted:Do you know how long a visit to the hair salon takes? She said she had a half hour left at that point, which means she knew it would be there like Domino's.
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Jul 23, 2016 11:38
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MN | Uncategorized I am working the ovens at a pizza chain that offers both carryout and delivery. Customer # 1 comes in to pick up his order. He has long dyed blond hair. Our Till worker informs him that his first pizza is ready and his second one will be out in about 30 seconds. Customer # 1: “Why is the second pizza not ready with the first. “ Till: “I took a little more time to make the second one so it went in the oven a little while after the first”. Customer # 1 “that’s not how it works” Manager steps in. “Im sorry for the delay sir, but the first pizza was a simple cheese and the second was a works pizza. IT takes a little more time to put all the topping on your pizza.” Customer # 1 (getting very nasty) “Have you even taken a Customer Service course before. “ Manager “yes” Customer # 1 “I demand to see the certificate right now” Manager “I cant do that, I need to make other peoples orders now” Customer # 1 “What is your name” Manager “*****. Sir, you have your order, please leave, I have a store to run”. Customer # 1, rants for a little while, then leaves. Customer # 2 who witnessed everything and has already paid for his order takes out $20 and hands it to my manager. “You souldnt have to deal with assholes like him.” Manager “Thank you, but I can’t take that” and hand it back. He then put in on the counter and leaves the store. She then makes change for it and gives me, the till and another worker $5 and keeps the last part. They then tell me this isn’t the first time he has made a scene. About half an hour later the phone rings and I Answer. Me: “thank you for calling ****, this is ****, How may I help you” Customer # 1 (Very nice) “who is the manager right now” ME: “***” Customer # 1 “May I speak with her” Me” May I ask with this is regarding” Customer # 1 “This is **** and I want to talk to her about the incident that happened about 30 mins ago” Me “ok please hold” Customer # 1” Ok” I told my manger it was the guy, and he wanted to talk to her. I also told her I was going to listen in to the line because of him being a trouble making customer. Manager “Thank you for holding, this is ***, how may I help you”. Customer # 1 (very nasty and he doesn’t know im listening) “HI, I was in earlier and I want to know the names of the store manager, and his manger, and I want their phone numbers. “ Manger “ I can give you their name, but I cant give out their numbers.” Customer # 1 “Your telling me you cant call your manager if there is a problem.” Manager “no, I just cant give you their numbers.” Customer # 1 “When will the store manager be in so I can call and talk to him.” Manger “He is opening in the morning.” Customer # 1 “I will be calling him. And let me tell you what you did wrong. You Saw my hair and assumed I was uneducated. I have a masters degree and am a regional manager for an aeronautics cooperation. I am educated and I assure you I am Smarter then you.” Manager “Sir, if you don’t have anything important to tell me now, I need to get back to running my store.” Customer # 1 “Assure your boss that I will be calling him.” Hangs up We check over his account and see he got free food about 3 months ago, we think he complains until we give him his food for free. We told out boss about the incident and noted how he talked to me verses my manager, probably to make me think he was level headed and she was being rude to her, but he didn’t know I was listening in on them. We haven’t heard from him again.
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Jul 23, 2016 15:28
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I'm totally willing to believe almost all of that, there's nothing that over the top except for Customer 2 randomly giving the manager  .That sounds like exactly the type of person who makes unreasonable complaints to try to scam free food.
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Jul 23, 2016 15:37
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Well it might have been true but it was such a boring story, Jesus.
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Jul 23, 2016 18:50
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WampaLord posted:I'm totally willing to believe almost all of that, there's nothing that over the top except for Customer 2 randomly giving the manager "And let me tell you what you did wrong. You Saw my hair and assumed I was uneducated. I have a masters degree and am a regional manager for an aeronautics cooperation. I am educated and I assure you I am Smarter then you.” Yes a human certainly did say that
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Jul 23, 2016 20:22
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So apparently STDH stories ending with "Loch Ness Monsta!" is now a thing imgurians find to be the height of hilarity. http://imgur.com/gallery/l0roE
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Jul 23, 2016 21:00
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CannedMacabre posted:So apparently STDH stories ending with "Loch Ness Monsta!" is now a thing imgurians find to be the height of hilarity. This is the sort of thing I would have found funny in high school, so I'm assuming (/hoping) that's the main fan base.
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Jul 23, 2016 21:30
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Ytlaya posted:This is the sort of thing I would have found funny in high school, so I'm assuming (/hoping) that's the main fan base. oh my sweet summer child
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Jul 23, 2016 21:48
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Non Serviam posted:I'm just disappointed the game seems to be about going to a place, stand still, and look at your phone. It'd be nicer if Pokémon were everywhere, randomly. Like in the game. They are everywhere. Pokestops and gyms are specific locations but don't have anything to do with wild Pokemon.
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Jul 24, 2016 01:51
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Employee, Phone Home Retail | OH, USA | Bosses & Owners, Lazy/Unhelpful (It’s a slow day at work. Five of us are sitting by the back stairwell, just talking and killing time. One of the managers joins us, right as a coworker pulls her phone out. Management has stated that if you have your phone out, they’ll take it for the day and write you up.) Me: “Hey, [Manager], [Coworker] has her phone out!” Manager: *looks over at my coworker* “So she does.” Me: “Aren’t you supposed to take it?” Manager: *shrugs* “It’s not like we have anything else to do.” (Half of us pulled our phones out. I ended up going home early.)
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Jul 25, 2016 04:10
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Why would someone make up a story that starred themselves as a snitching dickweed?
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Jul 25, 2016 05:09
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Not only that, how is it remarkable in any way that someone thought it worth sharing. "Hey internet, it was a slow day at work today. It was so slow that management allowed us to do what we wanted for a while. ISN'T THAT AMAZING??"
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Jul 25, 2016 05:28
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Coworkers ratting each other out for stupid rule violations to score points with the boss is certainly a thing, but yeah I don't know why you'd brag about it when it backfires like that. Make sure your boss is the type who thinks any rule, no matter how stupid and unnecessary, is sacred law first before you try and advance your career that way.
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Jul 25, 2016 07:29
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I love how they’ll take it for the day wasn't the first thing that jumped out at anyone. Like hell I'd trust a coworker, manager or not, with a $10 prepaid, let alone the hundreds that most phones go for off contact
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Jul 25, 2016 07:31
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A major chunk of the Epic Middle School Stories thread is a festival of STDH. http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3784098 Example quote:Also the french teacher asked "who wants to make a placemat for me?" at some stupid school event, and nobody put their hand up, then after a perfect beat some girl laughed really loudly and the teacher ran from the room crying.
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Jul 25, 2016 07:59
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Tunicate posted:Retail | OH, USA | Bosses & Owners, Lazy/Unhelpful 1. I love the lazy/unhelpful tag that suggests the author is mad at the manager for not backing him up and applying the rule 2. OH, USA. Oh, what did you so this time you silly nation.
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Jul 25, 2016 09:10
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Tunicate posted:Employee, Phone Home This isn't made up. The US really doesn't have basic human rights.
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Jul 25, 2016 13:27
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Khazar-khum posted:Tony This is believable, just not really a Crowning Moment of Anything. Back in high school we did Romeo & Juliet set in the 1960s in some weird meta-play that probably nobody gives a poo poo to hear about. We had a Bruni Olympic 6, a .22 Acorn blank gun, that would be used by Romeo to shoot Tybalt. The director wanted to acclimate everyone to the noise, so she sat the whole cast down and then just had them do the shooting with no warning on stage. There was a lot of screaming.
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Jul 25, 2016 13:55
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