you whore bitches don't deserve a nice guy like me .ppt

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > you whore bitches don't deserve a nice guy like me .ppt

mind the walrus: Sep 22, 2006

Pick posted:

I don't normally tell this story, but I think there are some lurkers trying to learn things in this thread (don't learn social interaction from the internet, you need to go outside and learn in person!), so here's an example of something a dude did which made me unhappy. No woman I ever dated has ever done anything similar, or seemed like she would, which I think says a lot about why it's easy to lesbian-date and hard to hetero-date.

I had been seeing this guy for a short while. We were only a few dates in, but things seemed to be going all right. He seemed responsible and fair and generally like a decent sort of person. He invited me to come meet his friends at the bar (and not like a dive bar, just one of the ones where normal folk hang out), and I accepted, because I thought that this was him showing trust in me and legitimate interest in having a relationship with me. I think trust is the most important aspect of a relationship, so I assumed this was a good sign. He came and picked me up at my place, and he drove me to the bar. We're having a good chat along the way, friendly a fun. Then, once we get to the bar, he goes around the side of the car to open the door for me. It's not a necessary gesture, but I don't mind it. However, as I'm getting out of the car, he says, "I want my friends to like you, so you will keep your mouth shut."

I was considerably taken aback by this, but I did as instructed. I barely spoke the entire evening, and mostly just nodded or let him answer questions about me. I didn't feel good about it but I felt confused and was trying to work out what was going on. Once we finished up, and got back into the car, he was elated. He thought everything went great. I still wasn't speaking much, since I was processing things. He just kept blabbering and blabbering about what a great evening it had been. At some point, I realize we're taking a route I don't recognize, and I'm like, huh? And he says, "We're going back to my place ". I hadn't been to his place before, and we weren't at the point where we were having sex. He had definitely not broached the idea of going back to his place beforehand. I said, "No, I would like to go home, please."

Of course, he lost his temper immediately, and accused me of being a horrible bitch who "ruined the perfect evening" and "why would [I] gently caress up everything now?" Eventually I convinced him that I was serious and he needed to take me home. He complained the entire way back, but he did take me back to my place, and I of course did not invite him in to follow me. He sent me a string of abusive text messages all night. A few days later they were all apologetic, but then they became hostile again. None of them ever seemed to realize why I had been unhappy, though, and they rang false considering that he was clearly only apologizing because he knew I was unhappy and not because he thought he'd done anything wrong. (In fact, a few were even "I don't know what happened but--") I got periodic texts for him for about a year after that, even when I told him not to contact me any more. He's probably told plenty of people about the crazy bitch who suddenly went ice queen on him and dumped him for no reason.

Cool story Pick.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 09:50

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# ? Apr 25, 2024 07:08

Facebook Aunt: Oct 4, 2008; wiggle wiggle

Pick posted:

If you want a woman you have started dating to have sex with you, I recommend not defaulting to doing something that suggests to her that she is in danger

It's fine if you live in a musical tho.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MFJ7ie_yGU

Yep.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 11:05

Ratjaculation: Aug 3, 2007

unironically shared clickbait

The darth vadar hats in 1955 :tinfoil:

That is a good rear end behind the text

This is just loving creepy and probably means you have NPD

"Keep an eye out for my rape wagon"

lol logic

at least white crayons have a loving purpose

yeah, with her boyfriend

this contradicts the earlier image

rape threat and then objectification

lol

lmbo

# ? Aug 6, 2016 11:22

MY PALE GOTH SKIN: Nov 28, 2006; meow

Whisper is terrible, half or more of the users are under 20.

If you post anything indicating you're female, you get tons of "Sup" and "hey" and dick pics and weird roleplaying paragraphs

If you try to chat normally with the first two, you usually get about six sentences in and they want a picture. If you do not provide a picture because loving having some random rear end in a top hat judge your appearance, it must be because you're fat/ugly/too skinny/have no boobs/have huge saggy tits/have no rear end/have a fat rear end/etc etc

I just reply to dick pics with this

And either block the gross paragraphs or reply with a paragraph of my own that starts out "sexy" and then quickly turns into me biting their dick off and spitting it in their face, at which point I get "What the gently caress is wrong with you?!"

Don't go on Whisper unless you're looking to argue or troll

# ? Aug 6, 2016 12:02

Curdy Lemonstan: Jan 25, 2012; by zen death robot

Lol @ the last one. 1955 indeed. My god who came up with all of these?

# ? Aug 6, 2016 12:02

Waterbed Wendy: Jan 29, 2009

Pick posted:

The watermelon wasn't even in anything, or disguised in any way, I just got confused. And if I'm going to look at a baby I'm not going to do it silently, I'm going to be friendly and say a nice thing about the baby, so I didn't have time to catch myself before revealing my misidentification.

Quoting this from way back because it is goddam amazing and I think I love you, Pick.

Look at it, everyone, and enjoy.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 12:40

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

Khazar-khum posted:

And so on. A lot of women, sadly, buy into the 'bad boys are so exciting!' and 'I can tame this wild stallion!' nonsense that popular media flings at them.

The guy equivalent of this is "Crazy girls are wild in bed!"

# ? Aug 6, 2016 14:23

Benny Harvey: Nov 24, 2012

Pick posted:

If you want a woman you have started dating to have sex with you, I recommend not defaulting to doing something that suggests to her that she is in danger

Such as being a man?

Bust Rodd posted:

But when I do see her, she just popped up to my house for a weekend uninvited and she almost literally said "you were such a caring and compassionate Nice Guy who put up with my crazy bullshit and listened to me bitch about all the guys I had empty sex with... So I want to show you my appreciation by loving you all weekend"

So like, my point is, um, sometimes being a Nice Guy DOES totally work out EXACTLY the way it shouldn't, I guess, but, er, uh, don't be a sadbrain mouthbreathy twerp about it, sever hard and early and don't waste your time pretending to be someone's friend if all you really want is sex or physical attention.

*I ought not to have boned her, but I did. We're still very close friends, and we're both seeing other people now, but it's weird lol*

Maybe she was just really horny and looking for some sick and said it was a "reward" instead because it sounded better.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 15:35

Sentient Data: Aug 31, 2011; My molecule scrambler ray will disintegrate your armor with one blow!

WampaLord posted:

The guy equivalent of this is "Crazy girls are wild in bed!"

TBF I can totally see a direct correlation between my 'craziest' exes and the partners that I'd consider the best in bed

# ? Aug 6, 2016 15:36

snoo: Jul 5, 2007

MY PALE GOTH SKIN posted:

And either block the gross paragraphs or reply with a paragraph of my own that starts out "sexy" and then quickly turns into me biting their dick off and spitting it in their face, at which point I get "What the gently caress is wrong with you?!"

haha and then what?

# ? Aug 6, 2016 15:40

MY PALE GOTH SKIN: Nov 28, 2006; meow

and then nothing, because I'm done gaining fleeting entertainment from loving with a stranger

why is your username familiar

# ? Aug 6, 2016 15:59

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

It's strange how these nice guys think that all guys fall into one of two categories. Either you're an rear end in a top hat that is always banging dumb sluts, or a nice guy finishing last.

I was at a bar once with my now wife, and this guy started ranting about how all the women there had no standards and obviously didn't appreciate the awesome guys like himself. How pathetically unaware.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 16:00

snoo: Jul 5, 2007

MY PALE GOTH SKIN posted:

and then nothing, because I'm done gaining fleeting entertainment from loving with a stranger

why is your username familiar

Sorry, it was one of those things that Nice Guys/dumb teenage boys do

snoo fucked around with this message at 16:07 on Aug 6, 2016

# ? Aug 6, 2016 16:04

Dinosaurmageddon: Jul 7, 2007; by zen death robot; Hell Gem

Y'know sometimes you whore bitches don't even deserve to know what dating a nice guy is like. I'd almost feel sorry for you except I only learned how to empathize through video games that reward me for making the 'good' dialogue choices.

e: whore phone, empathize

Dinosaurmageddon fucked around with this message at 23:01 on Aug 6, 2016

# ? Aug 6, 2016 16:31

Waterbed Wendy: Jan 29, 2009

Leon Einstein posted:

It's strange how these nice guys think that all guys fall into one of two categories. Either you're an rear end in a top hat that is always banging dumb sluts, or a nice guy finishing last.

I was at a bar once with my now wife, and this guy started ranting about how all the women there had no standards and obviously didn't appreciate the awesome guys like himself. How pathetically unaware.

sick wife brag, bro.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 16:33

Comfy Fleece Sweater: Apr 2, 2013; You see, but you do not observe.

Pick posted:

I don't normally tell this story, but I think there are some lurkers trying to learn things in this thread (don't learn social interaction from the internet, you need to go outside and learn in person!), so here's an example of something a dude did which made me unhappy. No woman I ever dated has ever done anything similar, or seemed like she would, which I think says a lot about why it's easy to lesbian-date and hard to hetero-date.

I had been seeing this guy for a short while. We were only a few dates in, but things seemed to be going all right. He seemed responsible and fair and generally like a decent sort of person. He invited me to come meet his friends at the bar (and not like a dive bar, just one of the ones where normal folk hang out), and I accepted, because I thought that this was him showing trust in me and legitimate interest in having a relationship with me. I think trust is the most important aspect of a relationship, so I assumed this was a good sign. He came and picked me up at my place, and he drove me to the bar. We're having a good chat along the way, friendly a fun. Then, once we get to the bar, he goes around the side of the car to open the door for me. It's not a necessary gesture, but I don't mind it. However, as I'm getting out of the car, he says, "I want my friends to like you, so you will keep your mouth shut."

I was considerably taken aback by this, but I did as instructed. I barely spoke the entire evening, and mostly just nodded or let him answer questions about me. I didn't feel good about it but I felt confused and was trying to work out what was going on. Once we finished up, and got back into the car, he was elated. He thought everything went great. I still wasn't speaking much, since I was processing things. He just kept blabbering and blabbering about what a great evening it had been. At some point, I realize we're taking a route I don't recognize, and I'm like, huh? And he says, "We're going back to my place ". I hadn't been to his place before, and we weren't at the point where we were having sex. He had definitely not broached the idea of going back to his place beforehand. I said, "No, I would like to go home, please."

Of course, he lost his temper immediately, and accused me of being a horrible bitch who "ruined the perfect evening" and "why would [I] gently caress up everything now?" Eventually I convinced him that I was serious and he needed to take me home. He complained the entire way back, but he did take me back to my place, and I of course did not invite him in to follow me. He sent me a string of abusive text messages all night. A few days later they were all apologetic, but then they became hostile again. None of them ever seemed to realize why I had been unhappy, though, and they rang false considering that he was clearly only apologizing because he knew I was unhappy and not because he thought he'd done anything wrong. (In fact, a few were even "I don't know what happened but--") I got periodic texts for him for about a year after that, even when I told him not to contact me any more. He's probably told plenty of people about the crazy bitch who suddenly went ice queen on him and dumped him for no reason.

So why don't you keep your mouth shut in the forums when we tell you

# ? Aug 6, 2016 16:37

Shinjobi: Jul 10, 2008; Gravy Boat 2k

Ratjaculation posted:

Was she homeless?

Well obviously...uh...hm.

:tinfoil:

# ? Aug 6, 2016 16:42

A Man and his dog: Oct 24, 2013; by R. Guyovich

I'm seeing a cougar and it owns. All we do is work our days, come home at night, chill and bone it out.

Give women space. They need that poo poo.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 16:46

Meme Poker Party: Sep 1, 2006; by Azathoth

Don Tacorleone posted:

So why don't you keep your mouth shut in the forums when we tell you

# ? Aug 6, 2016 17:15

Mak0rz: Aug 2, 2008; 😎🐗🚬

Pick holy poo poo that story is horrifying :stare:

also hmu I heard you like spiders beets and misidentifying babies as fruit

# ? Aug 6, 2016 17:20

Errant Gin Monks: Oct 2, 2009; "Yeah..."
- Marshawn Lynch

A Man and his dog posted:

I'm seeing a cougar and it owns. All we do is work our days, come home at night, chill and bone it out.

Give women space. They need that poo poo.

Is he a Latino like the last one?

Also, how are random crazy guys supposed to get you to their house to axe murder you if they tell you before hand that's where you are going?

Errant Gin Monks fucked around with this message at 18:28 on Aug 6, 2016

# ? Aug 6, 2016 17:21

CarForumPoster: Jun 26, 2013; â¡POWERâ¡

Khazar-khum posted:

--So? It doesn't mean anything

And so on. A lot of women, sadly, buy into the 'bad boys are so exciting!' and 'I can tame this wild stallion!' nonsense that popular media flings at them.

This isn't due to popular media. Abuse victims (and sometimes people who arent childhood trauma survivors) generally need greater arousal to feel attached in a relationship and will seek out people willing to do the dance of creating chaos and excitement in their lives. They don't feel attached to people who do not create this chaos.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 17:21

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Mak0rz posted:

Pick holy poo poo that story is horrifying

also hmu I heard you like spiders beets and misidentifying babies as fruit

I don't work with mammals it's an easy mistake !!

# ? Aug 6, 2016 17:24

Ratjaculation: Aug 3, 2007

A Man and his dog posted:

I'm seeing a cougar and it owns. All we do is work our days, come home at night, chill and bone it out.

Give women space. They need that poo poo.

Dude, don't pork your own mother

# ? Aug 6, 2016 18:58

Professor Shark: May 22, 2012

Pick posted:

I don't normally tell this story, but I think there are some lurkers trying to learn things in this thread (don't learn social interaction from the internet, you need to go outside and learn in person!), so here's an example of something a dude did which made me unhappy. No woman I ever dated has ever done anything similar, or seemed like she would, which I think says a lot about why it's easy to lesbian-date and hard to hetero-date.

I had been seeing this guy for a short while. We were only a few dates in, but things seemed to be going all right. He seemed responsible and fair and generally like a decent sort of person. He invited me to come meet his friends at the bar (and not like a dive bar, just one of the ones where normal folk hang out), and I accepted, because I thought that this was him showing trust in me and legitimate interest in having a relationship with me. I think trust is the most important aspect of a relationship, so I assumed this was a good sign. He came and picked me up at my place, and he drove me to the bar. We're having a good chat along the way, friendly a fun. Then, once we get to the bar, he goes around the side of the car to open the door for me. It's not a necessary gesture, but I don't mind it. However, as I'm getting out of the car, he says, "I want my friends to like you, so you will keep your mouth shut."

I was considerably taken aback by this, but I did as instructed. I barely spoke the entire evening, and mostly just nodded or let him answer questions about me. I didn't feel good about it but I felt confused and was trying to work out what was going on. Once we finished up, and got back into the car, he was elated. He thought everything went great. I still wasn't speaking much, since I was processing things. He just kept blabbering and blabbering about what a great evening it had been. At some point, I realize we're taking a route I don't recognize, and I'm like, huh? And he says, "We're going back to my place ". I hadn't been to his place before, and we weren't at the point where we were having sex. He had definitely not broached the idea of going back to his place beforehand. I said, "No, I would like to go home, please."

Of course, he lost his temper immediately, and accused me of being a horrible bitch who "ruined the perfect evening" and "why would [I] gently caress up everything now?" Eventually I convinced him that I was serious and he needed to take me home. He complained the entire way back, but he did take me back to my place, and I of course did not invite him in to follow me. He sent me a string of abusive text messages all night. A few days later they were all apologetic, but then they became hostile again. None of them ever seemed to realize why I had been unhappy, though, and they rang false considering that he was clearly only apologizing because he knew I was unhappy and not because he thought he'd done anything wrong. (In fact, a few were even "I don't know what happened but--") I got periodic texts for him for about a year after that, even when I told him not to contact me any more. He's probably told plenty of people about the crazy bitch who suddenly went ice queen on him and dumped him for no reason.

I have a friend who was dating a guy for 7+ years and though he was always invited to go out with her and her friends, she was never invited to go out with him and his friends... she'd only met his friends a few times in passing or briefly while hanging out at his apartment. She was getting to the end of her rope with the relationship and eventually told him that she wanted to go out for the group dinner his friends had planned for his birthday, and he agreed.

When they went to the restaurant the guy didn't introduce her to anyone, so after a while she just announced to the table who she was and met everyone, who were pleasant and happy to finally meet her. She had a good time, and really liked a few of his guy friend's girlfriends.

At the end of the night he drove her home, and I guess as soon as the car door was closed he started losing his poo poo at her, telling her that she had no idea how badly she'd embarrassed herself and how foolish she had made him look. He dropped her off and went home, she was wreck, until she spoke to some friends and realized how hosed the entire thing was.

She broke up with him, found a great guy quickly, they're married now.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 19:15

Shinjobi: Jul 10, 2008; Gravy Boat 2k

That kinda poo poo is just so loving weird to me.

At what point in your childhood do you develop the idea that SOs are just occasional accessories to your social circle? That's bizarre. Gonna try it next weekend without tellin the missus. :v:

# ? Aug 6, 2016 19:20

Professor Shark: May 22, 2012

My theory is that he had someone else on the side (or she was actually the side) and he needed to keep her separate from his friends, least it should all come crashing down by a stray comment or someone taking pity on her

# ? Aug 6, 2016 19:31

Curdy Lemonstan: Jan 25, 2012; by zen death robot

Meh my gf and some of my friends antagonize the gently caress out of eachother so I separate them? I dont have time to deal with that poo poo so I dont.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 19:38

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

I don't introduce all my friends to all my other friends, or at least I try to do it in a controlled way. Some of them would absolutely murder each other. (One reason why I don't get big wedding ceremonies--my mother alone would guarantee a big event was a dumpster fire.) One of my female friends in particular absolutely terrifies the poo poo out of men (and a lot of women), so I've never introduced any man friends to her.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 19:40

naem: May 29, 2011

WampaLord posted:

The guy equivalent of this is "Crazy girls are wild in bed!"

_{_{they are}}

# ? Aug 6, 2016 19:44

Curdy Lemonstan: Jan 25, 2012; by zen death robot

Its absolutely okay to control your social circles. The guy described was totally weird about it though.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 19:45

Moon Atari: Dec 26, 2010

Personally, I subscribe to the spice girls philosophy on friend/lover diplomatic relations.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 19:48

Mak0rz: Aug 2, 2008; 😎🐗🚬

Pick posted:

One of my female friends in particular absolutely terrifies the poo poo out of men (and a lot of women), so I've never introduced any man friends to her.

Wait what? What's her story?

Curdy Lemonstan posted:

Its absolutely okay to control your social circles. The guy described was totally weird about it though.

My friend is dating a guy who, in the early days of their relationship, instructed her not to make their status obvious at their gaming group thing because nerd cliques are ticking timebombs for stupid childish drama. I told her to call him out on that bullshit but she defended it by going on about how friends are hard for her to make/keep and other such nerd social fallacy stuff we've all heard before. They've been together for like 8 years now. We hang out sometimes and he's (well, both are) goon central but he's actually super nice and doesn't do the controlling stuff anymore.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 19:51

King of Bees: Dec 28, 2012; Gravy Boat 2k

Lmao if you have any friends to introduce your SO to. It's called MGTOW for a reason.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 19:53

Puppy Galaxy: Aug 1, 2004

I'm nice

# ? Aug 6, 2016 19:57

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Mak0rz posted:

Wait what? What's her story?

She's an aggressive person :shrug:

# ? Aug 6, 2016 20:00

Professor Shark: May 22, 2012

Curdy Lemonstan posted:

Its absolutely okay to control your social circles.

Describe a normal way of doing this

# ? Aug 6, 2016 20:00

Curdy Lemonstan: Jan 25, 2012; by zen death robot

Professor Shark posted:

Describe a normal way of doing this

Oh i dont mean control them as in being manipulative.

Okay: I have reaaaaaaally old friends who are very christian and I sometimes meet them.and enjoy their company

I have newer friends who are more like me (ie stoners drinking out and about having fun kind of people)

These two social circles should be kept apart for very obvious reasons.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 20:05

Curdy Lemonstan: Jan 25, 2012; by zen death robot

Hm, some of my nerdy comp sci class mates (and friends) maybe wouldnt work very well together with my gender science friends from before. Why mix when you dont have to? I make time for many friends sooo, no real problem?

# ? Aug 6, 2016 20:07

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# ? Apr 25, 2024 07:08

Tumble: Jun 24, 2003; I'm not thinking of anything!

naem posted:

_{_{they are}}

I never understood where this gem came from, because I really don't find it to be that true. The girls that are best in bed are usually the cute ones who are able to function in social situations and don't get crazy/clingy with no-strings attached hook-ups.

Same goes for fat girls; I'm not sure where the whole "fat girls give good head" comes from. It's one of those jokes that people started taking as gospel; again, the best head comes from girls that practice and enjoy it. Fat girls usually have problems that probably lead to less hook-ups.

I'm gonna go with cute, sex-positive (or "slutty" but not in a derogatory way) girls for the best sex.

# ? Aug 6, 2016 20:08

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > you whore bitches don't deserve a nice guy like me .ppt

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