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BoonyPC
Feb 19, 2007

Space Poodle posted:

I would just like to point out: that happens to people who get cancer.

Can you imagine? "Oh, wow, you look great! What's your secret?"

LITERAL DYING. THAT IS LE SEEKREET.

I lost a lot of weight a few years back and while most people were happy to tell me how good I was looking there were a few that thought I had some form of illness

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kosherpickle
Aug 6, 2009

Moon Atari posted:

I don't think so, but so many of my posts are bizarre gay fiction or about swallowing cum that I've started to ask some questions of myself lately.

I ask because you said in your experience, as if you'd also experienced how dudes are in bed with condoms.

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost
The pseudo-intellectualism is not at all surprising from that guy, sorry you had to deal with him.

dads_work_files
May 14, 2008

important_document.avi

Moridin920 posted:

Just look at George Elliot, dude simultaneously thought he was god's gift to humanity and also couldn't figure out why he was estranged from everybody and thus responded by acting even more socially awkward rather than fixing his own issues or acknowledging any fault. He blamed the entire world for not 'giving him his due' when he lost the lottery. And he wasn't bad looking or ugly or fat.

George Eliot was a woman.

CrazyLoon
Aug 10, 2015

"..."

kosherpickle posted:

Basically, look at his posts. He talks a lot of loving game, talks about being in shape and the gym (average body heading towards flabby in real life), women's looks and stuff about their age and being gold-diggers(he's over 30 and still struggling with his job, I actually make more than he does), etc etc. He talks about holding women off and how to control things when his only efforts to control things came off as super creepy (telling me I was childish) and his attempts at pua/redpill tactics were super obvious and lame. I am super average, like, body below average, actually. Short, chubby, a single mom, daddy issues. My face is all right and so's my personality so I think that all evens out to average. Yet he kept after me and still wanted to insert himself into my life all these years later even though he goes on about bangs, notches, and rating women on scales and who he will and won't go out with. He wasn't the only one like that either, just the only one I found definite proof of through his internet history.

To sum it all up, they all talk like they are some seriously awesome poo poo, got it all together (except when they ask for advice, very knowingly and yet simultaneously with insecurity, somehow), know how women "really" are, talk about their plates and their game blah blah...but in real life they are the dudes they claim to look down upon ("betas") or just plain rear end in a top hat, creepy, pathetic or a combination of it all. This dude also has the added bonus of being a pseudo-intellectual and talking a lot of poo poo on forums about others' intelligence (I didn't post those because they weren't relevant) that's so common to these groups. Like, I could practically see him writing [body] in his head when starting a topic.

I really, REALLY, wish I had my other phone with the pics of how he talks about the women he's dated. I'll try and see if I can get to them tonight.

Basically, still a raging teenager by behavior then? At least, that's the impression I'm getting of him from how you describe him here and as I read the poo poo he typed online. I imagine IRL he was probably somewhat awkward with his attempts, very unrelaxed, and tried to force confidence so hard that anyone with half a brain could see right through to his scared shitless core.

And yea, pseudo-intellectualism does tend to be very prevalent among those who use the internet for whatever hosed up opinion they had, so...I'd say that's a more general problem, though I can imagine super-annoying when describing a human being like some mathematical equation or 'childish' in your case. Either way, figured it was this just yea...in particular curious as to RL how he acted. Over the internet these bozos are easy enough to spot, even when they aren't going on their redpill poo poo.

Curdy Lemonstan
Jan 25, 2012

by zen death robot

Pick posted:

if you're hot enough, being broken becomes being quirky. Thank god

Its also all about relativity. When I studied social work I was one of 10 guys around 120 women, automatically making us guys the center of attention and interest (even though none of us were particularly good looking). Now im in the data engineering field and its the complete opposite, every girl is always followed by at least 10 buff engineering dudes. Im happy I got a ltr relationship in time because I'm just not interested in competing with 10 guys over one woman. Also nobody falls within my general political spectrum apart from some truly chill dudes but that is another matter.

Moon Atari
Dec 26, 2010

The alpha/beta philosophy is always really sad to me and I've had arguments trying to convince other guys that it isn't accurate or a healthy way to think. It can cause some otherwise decent guys to act like jerks to women because they think the only way to get a girl is to be the coolest dude that impresses her with arrogant confidence, when inside they are actually feeling something along the lines of "gosh she is so pretty and smart I just want to make her like me", which they could probably get better results by just outright saying. Then on the hurting themselves rather than women side of things the philosophy almost always leads to them blaming themselves excessively for getting rejected, cheated on or broken up with. They might call the woman names but everything they say actually suggests that they think that they got cheated on because they were too lame to keep better men from stealing their girl.

Squashing Machine
Jul 5, 2005

I mean boning, the wild mambo, the hunka chunka
infamous San Bernardino shooter George Eliot Rodger

CrazyLoon
Aug 10, 2015

"..."
I can't think of a single case where a person called by others as 'alpha' wasn't just a loving rear end in a top hat and where a person called as 'beta' wasn't actually just a decent enough person, if only they weren't so obsessed with not being called 'beta'.

poo poo, for certain wild animal groups (apes/monkeys for chrissakes, how close can one get to humanity?) the alpha males are more often than not the first ones to die in fights or to hazards/predators, while the beta males just chill, live longer and ultimately gently caress more and sire more kids. You'd think said pseudo-intellectuals would at least bother to pay attention to nature vids, rather than just spout terms from it.

Business Gorillas
Mar 11, 2009

:harambe:



Frosted Flake posted:

Is this what people who grew up being attractive feel their whole lives?

it is and its also why someone who's had the reverse (used to be hot but then got fat/old) is so bitter

imagine living that your whole life and then having it yanked out from under you and people start treating you like they aren't always trying to gently caress you normally

how me a frog
Feb 6, 2014
I am amazed how threads mocking sad and pathetic delusional people invariably become some queer embarassment black market where goons readily outdo the original subject matter, whore for attention or regale nobody in particular with the details of mundane experiences they claim to have made.

"No! I must riddicule the nice guys" he shouted
The radio said "No John you are the nice guys"
And then John tipped his fedora

Business Gorillas
Mar 11, 2009

:harambe:



Frosted Flake posted:

e: I don't really get online dating. Surely once you reach the point of a few hundred Tinder matches or people actually coming up to you in public you don't need to navigate OKC or POF. I checked them out once and the number of women who had been members for months was concerning.

you know how nice guys are always pouting about how they can't find anybody but they totally ignore girls that aren't 7/10's and above? lots of OKC/POF are girls that have the same problem. the amount of profiles that i've seen that are a list of "don't talk to me if you're x, y, or z" or just a bitter diatribe about their exes or how miserable they are is astonishing

then again there's also people like me who go to school full time/work multiple jobs and picking up numbers on an app is easier

Squashing Machine
Jul 5, 2005

I mean boning, the wild mambo, the hunka chunka
We've got more control and choice in our dating lives than ever and we've never been less happy

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
the whole alpha beta thing isn't even real for wolves lol it's so stupid

they did a study based on wolves in captivity suddenly every human thinks it applies to them because dogs

house of the dad
Jul 4, 2005

how me a frog posted:

I am amazed how threads mocking sad and pathetic delusional people invariably become some queer embarassment black market where goons readily outdo the original subject matter, whore for attention or regale nobody in particular with the details of mundane experiences they claim to have made.

"No! I must riddicule the nice guys" he shouted
The radio said "No John you are the nice guys"
And then John tipped his fedora

Look man, it's been a dream of mine since I started reading this site to get my dick sucked by a goon and if you have a better idea of how to make that happen then for the love of god let's hear it because it's been 11 years at this point

TehRedWheelbarrow
Mar 16, 2011



Fan of Britches

gigawhite posted:

Look man, it's been a dream of mine since I started reading this site to get my dick sucked by a goon and if you have a better idea of how to make that happen then for the love of god let's hear it because it's been 11 years at this point

Start by PMing randoms about how witty and insightful they are, might be easier if you are bi-curious at least.

Mr. 47
Jul 8, 2008

Well, I guess I'll just go fuck myself, then.

Dreddout posted:

If I don't buy Magnum xxxl my girlfriend won't be able to tell I have a big dong!

Mr. 47
Jul 8, 2008

Well, I guess I'll just go fuck myself, then.

gigawhite posted:

Look man, it's been a dream of mine since I started reading this site to get my dick sucked by a goon and if you have a better idea of how to make that happen then for the love of god let's hear it because it's been 11 years at this point

Wow. That's just bad luck. I met my current girlfriend, we started dating, and only afterward did we discover that we were both goons. (Although I had been absent for quite some time.)

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
i sold weed to a goon once

i didn't have much and i didn't really want to but he offered to pay $50 for a gram and when you're 18-19 that's not a deal you pass up. i still feel kinda bad about it though years later.

i bought more weed with it

Captain Yossarian
Feb 24, 2011

All new" Rings of Fire"

gigawhite posted:

Look man, it's been a dream of mine since I started reading this site to get my dick sucked by a goon and if you have a better idea of how to make that happen then for the love of god let's hear it because it's been 11 years at this point

Dude Id suck you dick for free pm me :bigtran:

Moon Atari
Dec 26, 2010

My account and plat were a christmas present from an exgf, so ive technically had my dick sucked by a goon, although she never posted much. Surprisingly, getting me an account here was nowhere near the worst thing she ever did to me.

kosherpickle
Aug 6, 2009

CrazyLoon posted:

Basically, still a raging teenager by behavior then? At least, that's the impression I'm getting of him from how you describe him here and as I read the poo poo he typed online. I imagine IRL he was probably somewhat awkward with his attempts, very unrelaxed, and tried to force confidence so hard that anyone with half a brain could see right through to his scared shitless core.

And yea, pseudo-intellectualism does tend to be very prevalent among those who use the internet for whatever hosed up opinion they had, so...I'd say that's a more general problem, though I can imagine super-annoying when describing a human being like some mathematical equation or 'childish' in your case. Either way, figured it was this just yea...in particular curious as to RL how he acted. Over the internet these bozos are easy enough to spot, even when they aren't going on their redpill poo poo.

He was actually super relaxed and comfortable despite being obvious, which led me to believe he had been doing this for awhile and was confident about it working. Which is totally likely if he were meeting women who don't know about that stuff. Sadly for him, he met me at my redditory and should have known I was on to him the second he found my account.

Pick posted:

The pseudo-intellectualism is not at all surprising from that guy, sorry you had to deal with him.

Don't worry about it, it was a really good learning experience for me. I never believed those guys actually operated in the wild like that and now I know.

Dreddout
Oct 1, 2015

You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.

Moon Atari posted:

Surprisingly, getting me an account here was nowhere near the worst thing she ever did to me.

But it was the worst thing she did to the rest of us!

Mak0rz
Aug 2, 2008

😎🐗🚬

gigawhite posted:

Look man, it's been a dream of mine since I started reading this site to get my dick sucked by a goon and if you have a better idea of how to make that happen then for the love of god let's hear it because it's been 11 years at this point

One of the first posts in the anonymous e/n thread was someone saying they seek out and gently caress goons on the reg so find a way to hit them up

Kurtofan
Feb 16, 2011

hon hon hon

Moridin920 posted:

i sold weed to a goon once

i didn't have much and i didn't really want to but he offered to pay $50 for a gram and when you're 18-19 that's not a deal you pass up. i still feel kinda bad about it though years later.

i bought more weed with it

how dank was it

TehRedWheelbarrow
Mar 16, 2011



Fan of Britches

Mak0rz posted:

One of the first posts in the anonymous e/n thread was someone saying they seek out and gently caress goons on the reg so find a way to hit them up

same in the gbs one if you are especially freaky :pervert:

(i didnt know there was an e/n one :psyduck: )

Mak0rz
Aug 2, 2008

😎🐗🚬

SneakyFrog posted:

same in the gbs one if you are especially freaky :pervert:

(i didnt know there was an e/n one :psyduck: )

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3786276

Volume posted:

#6

quote:

I used to use SA as my own personal Tinder. I still do sometimes. It's easy enough as a woman to find guys to hook up with, now imagine that in the context of the forums. Like fish in a barrel. At this point in my life, I've definitely slept with more goons than non-goons. On the one hand, I feel really embarrassed and ashamed. On the other hand, despite the stereotype, there's a surprising number of hot guys on SA. And in keeping with the stereotype, a lot of them are a bit crazy so the sex is reeeeeally good.

I dunno what I'm expecting, I just felt like finally getting this off my chest. There's only one other person who knows and she thinks it's hilarious.

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost

kosherpickle posted:

He was actually super relaxed and comfortable despite being obvious, which led me to believe he had been doing this for awhile and was confident about it working. Which is totally likely if he were meeting women who don't know about that stuff. Sadly for him, he met me at my redditory and should have known I was on to him the second he found my account.

That's one reason Pick is just a character account and I lie on here all the time. good luck, anybody who knows me irl who finds this account, you just made your job a lot harder than if you'd just talked to me.

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

Kurtofan posted:

how dank was it

don't really remember but it wasn't lovely I don't think so there's that at least. def wasn't top shelf though

prolly like upper mids

Frosted Flake
Sep 13, 2011

Semper Shitpost Ubique

kosherpickle posted:

He was actually super relaxed and comfortable despite being obvious, which led me to believe he had been doing this for awhile and was confident about it working. Which is totally likely if he were meeting women who don't know about that stuff. Sadly for him, he met me at my redditory and should have known I was on to him the second he found my account.


Don't worry about it, it was a really good learning experience for me. I never believed those guys actually operated in the wild like that and now I know.

Wasn't he loving you tho? :shrug:

TehRedWheelbarrow
Mar 16, 2011



Fan of Britches
who the gently caress said this thread pmuch is now picks livejournal? :allears: you were amazingly accurate

I feel like its a setting and somehow its getting all daniel day lewis up in here.

Ratjaculation
Aug 3, 2007

:parrot::parrot::parrot:



It's me, btw, I'm the goonfucker

kosherpickle
Aug 6, 2009

Frosted Flake posted:

Wasn't he loving you tho? :shrug:

If you read, I explained I saw what he was doing but was lonely and the things he did before the condom thing weren't that big of a deal to me. But trying to gently caress me without a condom our very first time after I explicitly stated that wasn't going to happen was a huge red flag and that shut down any chance at all of sex with me.

Pick
Jul 19, 2009
Nap Ghost

SneakyFrog posted:

who the gently caress said this thread pmuch is now picks livejournal? :allears: you were amazingly accurate

I feel like its a setting and somehow its getting all daniel day lewis up in here.

I employ the same approach as garak from deep space nine

house of the dad
Jul 4, 2005

Ratjaculation posted:

It's me, btw, I'm the goonfucker

Hello

TehRedWheelbarrow
Mar 16, 2011



Fan of Britches

Pick posted:

I employ the same approach as garak from deep space nine

pretending to be a fictional alien in a spacestation full of odd and unintelligible lifeforms of varying degrees of intelligence?


not too bad of a plan really. :frog:

Benny Harvey
Nov 24, 2012

Pick posted:

That's one reason Pick is just a character account and I lie on here all the time. good luck, anybody who knows me irl who finds this account, you just made your job a lot harder than if you'd just talked to me.

Nice variation on the puppetmaster defence.

Stinky_Pete
Aug 16, 2015

Stinkier than your average bear
Lipstick Apathy

Pick posted:

That's one reason Pick is just a character account and I lie on here all the time. good luck, anybody who knows me irl who finds this account, you just made your job a lot harder than if you'd just talked to me.

nice cover

Stinky_Pete
Aug 16, 2015

Stinkier than your average bear
Lipstick Apathy

Benny Harvey posted:

Nice variation on the puppetmaster defence.

:hfive:

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Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
i assume everyone on the internet is an overweight white man until proven otherwise

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