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Triggered
Aug 21, 2016

Learn about this great man on mormon.org

dethkon posted:

Once again, you can accomplish this in your own home using a toilet. :confused:

Pissing on your own poo poo is definitely haram. You have a poo, flush and then you piss.

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Instruction Manuel
May 15, 2007

Yes, it is what it looks like!

Moon Atari posted:

The internet eventually leads all forms of expression to become increasingly ironic until their intended meaning becomes the opposite of their apparent content. The erotic manifestation of the ironic is porn of non-erotic, seemingly mundane activities. But to those 'in on it', with brains forever altered by the internet, these acts become incredibly arousing when depicted in the specific context of a streaming porn site. Some of you will think this ridiculous, others imagine it won't happen for some time, as internet pornography is too new. But a few have been to clips4sale, and know that we are already fapping far beyond the Rubicon.

Fapping Beyond the Rubicon would be a good band name

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

Triggered posted:

Pissing on your own poo poo is definitely haram. You have a poo, flush and then you piss.

an american poem, 2046

gary oldmans diary
Sep 26, 2005

Wamdoodle posted:

Fapping Beyond the Rubicon would be a good band name
shut up

Decebal
Jan 6, 2010
Thank god for that lady porn where people kiss and have sex in a relatively normal and loving manner.

stump collector
May 28, 2007

Mahuum Aqoha
Jan 15, 2004

SHEPARD!
Do it for the universe!
Fun Shoe
Just watch amateur stuff, there's usually no commentary/stories and it's filmed at lower resolutions so you can't see gray scrotum hairs or razor burn.

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

Mahuum Aqoha posted:

Just watch amateur stuff, there's usually no commentary/stories and it's filmed at lower resolutions so you can't see gray scrotum hairs or razor burn.

plus it's less likely some hosed up poo poo that the actress doesn't really want to be doing but the porn people are making her anyway

bag em and tag em
Nov 4, 2008
If you watch the step mom/sister/dad stuff without volume (like God intended) then it's really just regular porn. Just don't read the title and you're fine.

Captain Yossarian
Feb 24, 2011

All new" Rings of Fire"

dad gay. so what posted:

they should make a porn with bigfoot and the loch ness monster

Im sure this exists. I'll fax u th deets

naem
May 29, 2011

dad gay. so what posted:

i like to pee on poop

we all do

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

RedMage129 posted:

If you watch the step mom/sister/dad stuff without volume (like God intended) then it's really just regular porn. Just don't read the title and you're fine.

Search history is a thing.

bongwizzard
May 19, 2005

Then one day I meet a man,
He came to me and said,
"Hard work good and hard work fine,
but first take care of head"
Grimey Drawer

Triggered posted:

Pissing on your own poo poo is definitely haram. You have a poo, flush and then you piss.

The gently caress? You pee first, then flush, then poo.

bag em and tag em
Nov 4, 2008

VendaGoat posted:

Search history is a thing.

Why in God's name would you not be taking care of your search history? That's porn watching fundamentals.

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

im done with porn

vyst
Aug 25, 2009



numberoneposter posted:

im done with porn

liar

Decebal
Jan 6, 2010

numberoneposter posted:

im done with porn

Yeah, we've all had orgasms before too

Moon Atari
Dec 26, 2010

RedMage129 posted:

Why in God's name would you not be taking care of your search history? That's porn watching fundamentals.

That's my legacy we are talking about!

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

Moon Atari posted:

That's my legacy we are talking about!

My contribution to the human race :gizz:

Cocksmith
Dec 28, 2012

by FactsAreUseless

Mahuum Aqoha posted:

Just watch amateur stuff, there's usually no commentary/stories and it's filmed at lower resolutions so you can't see gray scrotum hairs or razor burn.

amateur porn is full of ugly fatties

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

no its true

dads_work_files
May 14, 2008

important_document.avi

Just gimme a nice girl in a one-piece that looks a bit like my French teacher from when I was 15, I'll make it work

Decebal
Jan 6, 2010
How did people live when you had to put in some effort to see a woman naked :confused: Probably way more sexual misconduct back then.

Maybe porn's actually helping society after all

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer
i identify as a anal gaping granny

Triggered
Aug 21, 2016

Learn about this great man on mormon.org

bongwizzard posted:

The gently caress? You pee first, then flush, then poo.

No to do it properly you flush, poo poo and because you piss straight after a poo poo you have a jug handy to catch the piss. Flush the poo poo, put the piss into the toilet bowl and flush again.

opus111
Jul 6, 2014

only read the op lol but I've noticed that loving rosebudding has gone mainstream... ffs.

FedEx Mercury
Jan 7, 2004

Me bad posting? That's unpossible!
Lipstick Apathy

Decebal posted:

How did people live when you had to put in some effort to see a woman naked :confused: Probably way more sexual misconduct back then.

Maybe porn's actually helping society after all

Access to prostitutes used to be a lot easier.

Nolan Arenado
May 8, 2009

JiveHonky posted:

i identify as a anal gaping granny

bongwizzard
May 19, 2005

Then one day I meet a man,
He came to me and said,
"Hard work good and hard work fine,
but first take care of head"
Grimey Drawer

Triggered posted:

No to do it properly you flush, poo poo and because you piss straight after a poo poo you have a jug handy to catch the piss. Flush the poo poo, put the piss into the toilet bowl and flush again.

I am going to be serious for a moment and say that I have never taken a poo poo without pissing first and it is actually shocking to me to find out that this isnt universal.

Salty Josh
Jul 13, 2016

Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world, I feel like I can't take it, and my heart is just going to cave in.
Nap Ghost

OctoberBlues posted:

I only watch Skinemax

I'm with you man. Because at least... it seems like they are partially into it. It leaves more to the imagination and generally speaking, the acting is better. To me it seems more passionate and not so... disgusting. Just my opinion.

And Skinemax doesn't put viruses on your computer.

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo
if you watch too much gay porn will it rub off? asking for a friend

Moridin920
Nov 15, 2007

by FactsAreUseless
unless you're torrenting a bunch of porn it's not hard to avoid getting viruses though

Pvt.Scott
Feb 16, 2007

What God wants, God gets, God help us all
Sometimes a lady will kiss another lady's butthole. That's ok on occasion, I guess.

Blue Train
Jun 17, 2012

whatever happened to just watching the girl across the street through the window

qkkl
Jul 1, 2013

by FactsAreUseless
To stay pure I make sure to only watch porn that specifically says "NOT his mom/sister" in the title.

Decebal
Jan 6, 2010
:angel: NoScript :angel: for any virus fears

Nolan Arenado
May 8, 2009

Blue Train posted:

whatever happened to just watching the girl across the street through the window

I knew I was forgetting something on my shopping list... binoculars. Thanks!

Vegetable
Oct 22, 2010

The worst is pro porn that pretends it's amateur porn but has a cameraman swooping around the actors. Like, suspension of disbelief, this is filmmaking 101

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005
What's with the extreme close up, under the guy's balls, as he pounds away on a chick?

Just two shorn testes slamming away, in ultra close up 4k resolution?

Who watches that?

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Howard Beale
Feb 22, 2001

It's like this, Peanut

qkkl posted:

To stay pure I make sure to only watch porn that specifically says "NOT his mom/sister" in the title.

this is a top tip right here

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