Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Locked thread
Flesh Forge
Jan 31, 2011

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY DOG


e: :siren: NOT TRADEMARKED :siren:

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

The Dennis System
Aug 4, 2014

Nothing in Jurassic World is natural, we have always filled gaps in the genome with the DNA of other animals. And if the genetic code was pure, many of them would look quite different. But you didn't ask for reality, you asked for more teeth.
Also, incest porn has been around for a long time. I remember that guy on Love Line talking about an incest porn called Taboo 2 like 20 years ago.

generative grammer
Jul 28, 2010

by FactsAreUseless

The Dennis System posted:

Also, incest porn has been around for a long time. I remember that guy on Love Line talking about an incest porn called Taboo 2 like 20 years ago.

yes it's been a niche since the porn industry became a thing but now it's all over the front pages of streaming sites

Cocksmith
Dec 28, 2012

by FactsAreUseless

generative grammer posted:

yes it's been a niche since the porn industry became a thing but now it's all over the front pages of streaming sites

NOT his sister

Laurenz
Dec 21, 2015

They call him little janny hotpockets. He was terrific, he was the best, and he did it for free too.

The Dennis System posted:

Also, incest porn has been around for a long time. I remember that guy on Love Line talking about an incest porn called Taboo 2 like 20 years ago.

so has incest

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo

generative grammer posted:

I've probably seen this on the internet just by googling oldest porn film; it was a late 19th/early 20th century silent reel of heterosexual lovemaking in the missionary position for 20 seconds

probably was the oldest extant film but whatevs

And no link to this hotness

The Dennis System
Aug 4, 2014

Nothing in Jurassic World is natural, we have always filled gaps in the genome with the DNA of other animals. And if the genetic code was pure, many of them would look quite different. But you didn't ask for reality, you asked for more teeth.

generative grammer posted:

yes it's been a niche since the porn industry became a thing but now it's all over the front pages of streaming sites

Hmm, interesting. I never go to the front pages of those sites, so I didn't realize it was so popular. Maybe it's just a fad.

A Strange Aeon
Mar 26, 2010

You are now a slimy little toad
The Great Twist
I rarely ever watch porn; erotic stories are more my jam and there's no shortage of them, and using imagination avoids any aura of exploitation.

generative grammer
Jul 28, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
what's really weird is that back in the days thehun would feature really weird poo poo like preggo, enema, electric shock and lactating porn and it was probably the most popular porn aggregator at the time; i guess when all porn had to be bought from an xxx store you could also get easily exposed to poo poo like that

Lucky Guy
Jan 24, 2013

TY for no bm

hth posted:

pov lbfm

point of view lesbian butt-filling massage? that is extremely my poo poo

generative grammer
Jul 28, 2010

by FactsAreUseless

Darth123123 posted:

And no link to this hotness

well i think i found an older one and this is so victorian that it can be safely hosted on youtube
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iF3N6D9hQwk

e: can't be arsed to look for the actual one i'm thinking but here is a film with a really modern build-up and honkey tonk music

:nws: http://xhamster.com/movies/583770/the_first_porn_movie_ever.html

generative grammer fucked around with this message at 00:51 on Aug 30, 2016

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

Lucky Guy posted:

point of view lesbian butt-filling massage? that is extremely my poo poo

let me revise my previous statement

pov bi lbfm cim

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

also risky is a pretty pro search term

Laurenz
Dec 21, 2015

They call him little janny hotpockets. He was terrific, he was the best, and he did it for free too.
Man I feel sorry for people in the past who had nothing but their imaginations to jerk off to.

Don't get me wrong, imagination is great but so is porn.

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

Laurenz posted:

Man I feel sorry for people in the past who had nothing but their imaginations to jerk off to.

Don't get me wrong, imagination is great but so is porn.

your grandkids, or more likely grandnephews, are going to say the same about ultrasmut

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

their kids are probably gonna be jerkin it to cave paintings tho

naem
May 29, 2011

Laurenz posted:

Man I feel sorry for people in the past who had nothing but their imaginations to jerk off to.

Don't get me wrong, imagination is great but so is porn.

You just hoped that Buffy the vampire slayer wore a low cut shirt and bent over a lot that week (she always did)

Cocksmith
Dec 28, 2012

by FactsAreUseless

naem posted:

You just hoped that Buffy the vampire slayer wore a low cut shirt and bent over a lot that week (she always did)

you know porn existed in the 90s right

Nolan Arenado
May 8, 2009

JiveHonky posted:

dont blame me! i dont post patato pictures!

That guy's onto your game spudsy, and he's not going to stand for it. :mad:

Burt Sexual
Jan 26, 2006

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Switchblade Switcharoo

generative grammer posted:

well i think i found an older one and this is so victorian that it can be safely hosted on youtube
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iF3N6D9hQwk

e: can't be arsed to look for the actual one i'm thinking but here is a film with a really modern build-up and honkey tonk music

:nws: http://xhamster.com/movies/583770/the_first_porn_movie_ever.html

Thanks. Boy they really took their turns back then. Rotund women, but not blacks? Chamber maids even, surprising.

Lucky Guy
Jan 24, 2013

TY for no bm

WampaLord posted:

My main gripe is that I thought we were past the stupid idea of panning to the dude's face right before the money shot. I thought that was dead and gone, but lately I've been seeing it crop up again.

The last thing I want to see is some dude's O-face. In fact, just crop out the dude's face as much as possible.

I want to make a porno where the guys are completely cropped out with green screening except for their dongs. just a chick and 7 floating disembodied boners, probably in outer space

also one of the boners belongs to a midget, you cant see him but you can tell because that boner is only a foot off the ground

JiveHonky
May 12, 2001

by zen death robot
Grimey Drawer

OctoberBlues posted:

That guy's onto your game spudsy, and he's not going to stand for it. :mad:

i guess we're persona au gratin around here ts

Laurenz
Dec 21, 2015

They call him little janny hotpockets. He was terrific, he was the best, and he did it for free too.

naem posted:

You just hoped that Buffy the vampire slayer wore a low cut shirt and bent over a lot that week (she always did)

I'm talking about 100s of years ago man, when the average peasant teenager would have a very hard time trying to find an oil painting of a naked woman or something

Gaunab
Feb 13, 2012
LUFTHANSA YOU FUCKING DICKWEASEL
Midget porn never really got off the ground

Nolan Arenado
May 8, 2009

JiveHonky posted:

i guess we're persona au gratin around here ts

satanic splash-back
Jan 28, 2009

i long for the good old days of ancient yore, wherein people watched animals have sex, which turned them on.

ziasquinn
Jan 1, 2006

Fallen Rib
Incest porn has a built in backstory so they can cut right to the chase

My phone capitalised Chase cause of my house M.D. Thread

etalian
Mar 20, 2006

Darth123123 posted:

Thanks. Boy they really took their turns back then. Rotund women, but not blacks? Chamber maids even, surprising.

muff piled high

ziasquinn
Jan 1, 2006

Fallen Rib

Darth Freddy posted:

If it isn't dominant Women forcing a slave to eat their poo poo and lick their poop chute clean it's not worth my time

Instruction Manuel
May 15, 2007

Yes, it is what it looks like!

generative grammer posted:

well i think i found an older one and this is so victorian that it can be safely hosted on youtube
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iF3N6D9hQwk

e: can't be arsed to look for the actual one i'm thinking but here is a film with a really modern build-up and honkey tonk music

:nws: http://xhamster.com/movies/583770/the_first_porn_movie_ever.html

:holymoley: Woah, check out this girl on girl action :henget:

bongwizzard
May 19, 2005

Then one day I meet a man,
He came to me and said,
"Hard work good and hard work fine,
but first take care of head"
Grimey Drawer

Pvt.Scott posted:

The better theory on most of those Venus idols is that they were self-portraits done by pregnant women with time on their hands and no reflective surfaces. If you look at them from the top down, they're a pretty dead on view of what a pregnant chick in a cave would see. This also explains the general lack of head and face detail and the tapering legs, etc.

I never understood this idea, like, would not the artist have seen other pregnant women at some point? Even if they were self portraits, the body shape is still off.

I think cavemen just sucked at art.

Flesh Forge
Jan 31, 2011

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY DOG

JiveHonky posted:

i guess we're persona au gratin around here ts

nice

Zorodius
Feb 11, 2007

EA GAMES' MASTERPIECE 'MADDEN 2018 G.O.A.T. EDITION' IS A GLORIOUS TRIUMPH OF ART AND TECHNOLOGY. IT BRINGS GAMEDAY RIGHT TO THE PLAYER AND WHOEVER SAYS OTHERWISE CAN, YOU GUESSED IT...
SUCK THE SHIT STRAIGHT OUT OF MY OWN ASSHOLE.

BUY IT.
which is supposed to be the appeal of incest porn?:

A) "S/he is violating a sexy taboo by loving his/her sister"

-or-

B) "I want to gently caress my sister, and this helps me fantasize about that"

afeelgoodpoop
Oct 14, 2014

by FactsAreUseless
incest porn only makes sense to me if like the person enjoying it was a single child or had a huge age gap with their sibling or something.

JediTalentAgent
Jun 5, 2005
Hey, look. Look, if- if you screw me on this, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine, you rat bastard!
You don't even really need to peruse porn sites, anymore. Just go to DeviantArt.

various cheeses
Jan 24, 2013

Any time I hear a girl call someone daddy during sex it nukes my boner from space. That poo poo is gross.

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

I'm glad to see you have become accepting of the "status quo"

Toilet Shoes
Aug 22, 2016

by Lowtax

JiveHonky posted:

i guess we're persona au gratin around here ts

:colbert:

Da Fuq man?

JediTalentAgent
Jun 5, 2005
Hey, look. Look, if- if you screw me on this, I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine, you rat bastard!
Is there such a genre as "Life Coach" porn? I almost feel like that could be the perfect catch-all new genre. Every video also acts as a life's little instruction book. Start making a fetish of self-help and self-improvement.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

VendaGoat
Nov 1, 2005

JediTalentAgent posted:

Is there such a genre as "Life Coach" porn? I almost feel like that could be the perfect catch-all new genre. Every video also acts as a life's little instruction book. Start making a fetish of self-help and self-improvement.

"jerk off to yourself"?

Seems very "west coast"

  • Locked thread