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fivethree
Jul 28, 2014
*is 67*

*has 2 kids still in college*

*sits at cubicle and checks 401k account balance: $1.46*

*never bothered to contribute to 401k or any other investment vehicle*

*wife sends a text saying she's excited to retire*

*house needs a new roof*

*goes to employee bathroom and takes entire bottle of tylenol*

fivethree fucked around with this message at 20:23 on Sep 18, 2016

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EorayMel
May 30, 2015

WE GET IT. YOU LOVE GUN JESUS. Toujours des fusils Bullpup Français.
"Good thing I have bitcoin."

Jonny 290
May 5, 2005



[ASK] me about OS/2 Warp
if you have two kids in college at retirement age you're probably rich and okay. Poor people gently caress early.

Inexplicable Humblebrag
Sep 20, 2003

*continues to moderate forum*

Kuato
Feb 25, 2005

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"
Buglord
*keep working well into 70's, or death*

My organization is littered with those types. Everyone just wishes they'd drop dead.

redm
Feb 20, 2016


Sugartime Jones
*quietly reads a newspaper while sipping from a coffee mug*

Blue Train
Jun 17, 2012

lol if your retirement plan is anything but drinking a bottle of tequila and shooting yourself

nobody speak
Sep 18, 2016

by WE B Bourgeois

redm posted:

*quietly reads a newspaper while sipping from a coffee mug*

quietly instigates a broken home for your children by revealing his 10 year tryst

mom and dad fight a lot
Sep 21, 2006

If you count them all, this sentence has exactly seventy-two characters.
"This is your fault you money sucking bitch!"


"It's those drat millennials and their sense of entitlement!"

redm
Feb 20, 2016


Sugartime Jones

nobody speak posted:

quietly instigates a broken home for your children by revealing his 10 year tryst

nice post count

nobody speak
Sep 18, 2016

by WE B Bourgeois

redm posted:

nice post count

ballistics statistics
Nov 27, 2003

:shepface:God I fucking love Diablo 3 gold, it even paid for this shitty title:shepface:


*sells home in secret*

*takes the money and runs off to brazil*

*gets AIDS from tranny whore*

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

nobody speak
Sep 18, 2016

by WE B Bourgeois
*applies for government pension*
*elects politicians that give citizens enough money to live comfortably*

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

fivethree posted:

*is 67*

*has 2 kids still in college*

*sits at cubicle and checks 401k account balance: $1.46*

*never bothered to contribute to 401k or any other investment vehicle*

*wife sends a text saying she's excited to retire*

*house needs a new roof*

*goes to employee bathroom and takes entire bottle of tylenol*

did you vote for Ron?

nobody speak
Sep 18, 2016

by WE B Bourgeois
we must cleanse the brown ppl of their idolatry #ZOOL

http://www.tribalwar.com/forums/showthread.php?t=682779

Robot Danger
Mar 18, 2012
I saw a documentary on this called Lethal Weapon. It really opened my eyes to the importance of planning for retirement.

Pistol_Pete
Sep 15, 2007

Oven Wrangler
*Retires on comfortable state pension*

*Spends retirement writing angry letters to the newspapers demanding that other people's benefits be abolished*

nobody speak
Sep 18, 2016

by WE B Bourgeois
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCWUBXv8PAk

Roylicious
Feb 21, 2012

Braver than the cops
ain't afraid of no chaps
If they steppin up on me
I just start bustin some caps
Buy a gun and then take your next paycheck and vanish into Mexico and then C. or South America.

I mean whatever if you're gonna kill yourself might as well do something fun first.

phasmid
Jan 16, 2015

Booty Shaker
SILENT MAJORITY

Blue Train posted:

lol if your retirement plan is anything but drinking a bottle of tequila and shooting yourself
Probably a nice brandy, but yeah, this.

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost
Vote Republican no matter what

naem
May 29, 2011

Itt we are 2 out of 3 Americans

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

naem posted:

Itt we are 2 out of 3 Americans

:(

nobody speak
Sep 18, 2016

by WE B Bourgeois
plenty of money to go around when u aren't a retard german rich white classist

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

nobody speak posted:

plenty of money to go around when u aren't a retard german rich white classist

you are the worst poster in every thread apparently

GABA ghoul
Oct 29, 2011

Votes Trump cause it's somehow the Mexican's fault and Trump is the only candidate brave enough to say the truth

nobody speak
Sep 18, 2016

by WE B Bourgeois

Mumpy Puffinz posted:

you are the worst poster in every thread apparently

ty kindly *strokes fedoral hair*

Mumpy Puffinz
Aug 11, 2008
Nap Ghost

waitwhatno posted:

Votes Trump cause it's somehow the Mexican's fault and Trump is the only candidate brave enough to say the truth

Its the mexicans fault that Trump doesn't know what he is saying day to day.
Build the WALLL!

nobody speak
Sep 18, 2016

by WE B Bourgeois

Mumpy Puffinz posted:

Its the mexicans fault that Trump doesn't know what he is saying day to day.
Build the WALLL!

they should read Phrak magazine and learn how to make homemade absinthe at burning man also archive news groups

R-Type
Oct 10, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
*Chills, because my savings broke into 7 digits 10 years ago*

kecske
Feb 28, 2011

it's round, like always

*contemplates what crime will result in a lengthy jail term but with least chance of getting murked by other angry convicts*

Comfy Fleece Sweater
Apr 2, 2013

You see, but you do not observe.

Kuato posted:

*keep working well into 70's, or death*

My organization is littered with those types. Everyone just wishes they'd drop dead.

I wish YOU would drop dead you piece of poo poo

Remove this avatar AT ONCE

Grandma Panic!
Nov 4, 2006
the government will fix it right? :unsmith:

jBrereton
May 30, 2013
Grimey Drawer
Oh well I'll sell my house for £££s ridiculous.

a new study bible!
Feb 2, 2009



BIG DICK NICK
A Philadelphia Legend
Fly Eagles Fly


*adds subway tile backsplash to kitchen counter*

*resells house for 100k more than I paid for it*

Supreme Allah
Oct 6, 2004

everybody relax, i'm here
Nap Ghost

kecske posted:

*contemplates what crime will result in a lengthy jail term but with least chance of getting murked by other angry convicts*

Hit a cop with your car! but don't kill him, just wing him good.

Ivan Shitskin
Nov 29, 2002

*decides to hike across america to draw attention to self and to go on wonderful adventure to meet and help others and promote world peace and happiness across the heartland of america, while begging for money*

*makes it 10 miles down the highway, gets hit by truck*

*dies*

Philosopher King
Oct 25, 2006
Its ok huys soca security will be enough

Cockmaster
Feb 24, 2002

Supreme Allah posted:

Hit a cop with your car! but don't kill him, just wing him good.

Or record a cop behaving badly and then sue for false arrest.

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Return Of JimmyJars
Jun 24, 2006

by FactsAreUseless
*realizes the house has two HELOCs plus is in a rapidly deteriorating suburb where we were sold as a great investment opportunity and was $60,000 upside down on the mortgage from day 1*

*spent all of 401k to help wife open her dream business selling ugly dresses and costume jewelry to other old ladies, has made less than $1000 in 5 years of business*

*meth addict daughter has looted all the family antiquities from the house*

*hurls self off of parking garage roof 10 minutes after being fired for drinking at office desk*

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