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Medullah posted:Hey if Sons of Anarchy could go like five seasons with one thread the Blacklist certainly can too! I'm just trying to imagine what this show would look like if Kurt Sutter wrote it.
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Sep 22, 2016 03:46
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 01:16 |
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BrandonGK posted:I'm just trying to imagine what this show would look like if Kurt Sutter wrote it. "We need to cut out this boring James Spader talking bullshit and have some more man rape!"
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Sep 22, 2016 13:35
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Medullah posted:"We need to cut out this boring James Spader talking bullshit and have some more man rape!" James Spader getting raped by Tom. Actually I think Tom would just end up as a serial rapist in the Sutterverse Blacklist. There'd probably be some weird Spader / Lizzy incest as well.
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Sep 22, 2016 13:59
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Just rewatched the finale. Season predictions: -Tom shows up sometime in the second half of the premiere, and sticks around until he fucks off to spinoff land (probably 5-7 episodes). -Despite the backdoor pilot last year we'll probably get another one just before the spinoff starts. -Kirk is the Big Bad all season but disappears for about the middle half of it. Case-of-the-week shows will all have tenuous connections to finding Kirk/breaking down his organization/etc. -Sometime shortly after Liz/Tom/Baby are all safe Red's going to give Kaplan a big talking-to but in the end that dynamic will go back to what it was before. -Towards the end of the season the plot will go back to the main Cabal storyline for at least a while. -Liz will still not face any repercussions for killing the AG. e: -Ressler will develop some new problem but still continue to be a terrible drag on the show
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Sep 22, 2016 23:40
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Decapitation out of nowhere! Also, playing a round of international hot potato with a baby is going to get real tired, real fast this season.
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Sep 23, 2016 08:16
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Good god the telegraph is huge this season. Kirk needs Lizzy's [insert vital organ here] to cure his otherwise incurable blood disease because while he is Lizzy's father, he's now the show's Arvin Sloane who will do anything to further his agenda, up to and including using his granddaughter as leverage to force his impudent daughter to give him her [insert vital organ here] so he can raise his granddaughter to be a proper heir to the ~evil empire~ he's created. Then they'll go hunt down ~Romboldo~ artifacts so they can mind control everyone through Facebook and Twitter because that dude prognosticated it 1000 years ago. 
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Sep 23, 2016 08:39
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The show ends with Spader trapped in a Lazarus Pit.
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Sep 23, 2016 08:45
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Gonz posted:The show ends with Spader trapped in a Lazarus Pit. Precisely. I think one of the writers of this show binge-watched the animated Batman series. We're hosed if he watched Batman Beyond, too - the cliffhanger plot will be for Kirk to exchange his consciousness with Lizzy, so he can live on in her youthful body, because, you see, he's always had gender identity issues as WELL as being terminally ill from a blood disorder they couldn't name for some reason! It hits SO MANY DEMOGRAPHIC METRICS! "IS LIZZY STILL LIZZY?!?! FIND OUT NEXT SEASON!"
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Sep 23, 2016 08:53
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I don't think we even got one story by Red. Pretty disappointing. Show is still the same old show.
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Sep 23, 2016 13:23
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Am I the only one flustered by Kirk's attempts to convince Liz that he's a good guy, but also openly orders the death or her husband? I mean, surely you're not going to convince her that way.
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Sep 24, 2016 00:35
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n4 posted:Am I the only one flustered by Kirk's attempts to convince Liz that he's a good guy, but also openly orders the death or her husband? I mean, surely you're not going to convince her that way. I just laugh because I worked through Banshee this summer where he was the main villain and the writing is just as confusing in this show as that one was, just minus the breasts.
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Sep 24, 2016 00:52
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n4 posted:Am I the only one flustered by Kirk's attempts to convince Liz that he's a good guy, but also openly orders the death or her husband? I mean, surely you're not going to convince her that way. Not as flustered as I was given the overly-elaborate setup to Tom being held and then escaping. They'd already established the police down there were corrupt as hell. Why'd they have to take him to the wilderness when the people of Cuba would probably just ignore a chopped-up body in a bathtub somewhere? Oh yeah, and 'random Cuban daddy with a piece of poo poo truck in the middle of nowhere having a cell phone' was a stretch, too. The problem is, they have to waste a ton of loving time now convincing everyone Kirk is comparable to or better than Spader at being Spader - and that means more Kirk on-screen and less Spader. And...no. Just no.
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Sep 24, 2016 00:55
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I personally like that they drove Tom for who knows how long in the trunk of a car just to kill him. Why not kill him and just throw him in the trunk? And then the first or second time he got the drop on someone only to have a new gun trained on him, maybe THEN you should have killed him? Nope, they had to do the good ol' trope of "I'm gonna take my time with you, boy!"
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Sep 24, 2016 01:05
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The premiere felt more like a soap opera trying to be an 'action drama' than an actual 'action drama' show. Let's just hope it doesn't stay that way. It will... 
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Sep 24, 2016 01:28
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Medullah posted:I personally like that they drove Tom for who knows how long in the trunk of a car just to kill him. Why not kill him and just throw him in the trunk? And then the first or second time he got the drop on someone only to have a new gun trained on him, maybe THEN you should have killed him? It's been established that villainous henchmen in movies and TV hate nothing more than digging holes, so they're willing to take enormous risks just to force that guy to dig his own grave.
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Sep 24, 2016 02:09
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ShakeZula posted:It's been established that villainous henchmen in movies and TV hate nothing more than digging holes, so they're willing to take enormous risks just to force that guy to dig his own grave. Someday I'm going to make a movie that starts with whoever the big action star of the day is digging his grave with a henchman behind him telling him how much he's going to die, constantly checking his phone and getting distracted by birds and such. Once the grave is done, bang, shot fired, hero falls into the grave, then it becomes a romantic comedy. All trailers will be from the first 5 minutes of the movie.
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Sep 24, 2016 02:14
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Medullah posted:I personally like that they drove Tom for who knows how long in the trunk of a car just to kill him. Why not kill him and just throw him in the trunk? And then the first or second time he got the drop on someone only to have a new gun trained on him, maybe THEN you should have killed him? That's why I liked Hannibal, there was no screwing around.
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Sep 25, 2016 06:31
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Keene saying "I'm to your left" to let Reddington know where to shoot through the mirror is the most competent thing I think she's ever done on the show.
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Sep 29, 2016 02:04
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Medullah posted:Someday I'm going to make a movie that starts with whoever the big action star of the day is digging his grave with a henchman behind him telling him how much he's going to die, constantly checking his phone and getting distracted by birds and such. Once the grave is done, bang, shot fired, hero falls into the grave, then it becomes a romantic comedy. All trailers will be from the first 5 minutes of the movie. Just make sure the action star is Bryan Cranston.
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Sep 29, 2016 02:05
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At least we got a good 'this reminds me of' this episode. Christ, what a loving soap opera. It's true that Kirk is Lizzy's father - they're both bad, one-dimensional actors.
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Sep 30, 2016 04:09
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Babies ruin TV shows
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Sep 30, 2016 04:38
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Iowa Snow King posted:Babies ruin TV shows Human beings under the age of 18 ruin TV shows.
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Sep 30, 2016 04:39
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The only way Red's ineptness at failing to put another one in Mr. Kaplan's head to make sure he'd done it right is if she pulls a Sydney Bristow and comes back as a villain with amnesia.
BIG HEADLINE fucked around with this message at 06:05 on Sep 30, 2016 |
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Sep 30, 2016 05:59
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BIG HEADLINE posted:It's true that Kirk is Lizzy's father - they're both bad, one-dimensional actors. 
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Sep 30, 2016 10:49
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drat Reddington is a tough guy to work for.  And then he leaves her there on the ground because he had just shot the person who usually cleans up after him. Medullah posted:Someday I'm going to make a movie that starts with whoever the big action star of the day is digging his grave with a henchman behind him telling him how much he's going to die, constantly checking his phone and getting distracted by birds and such. Once the grave is done, bang, shot fired, hero falls into the grave, then it becomes a romantic comedy. All trailers will be from the first 5 minutes of the movie. So, Mr. Right. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2TatqilQ8rI Binary Logic fucked around with this message at 11:57 on Sep 30, 2016 |
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Sep 30, 2016 11:53
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I guess she's dead.... or is she? DUN DUN DUN Killing Kate was stupid, I hated it. Red is stupid.
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Oct 1, 2016 03:30
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Legitimately did not see that coming.
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Oct 7, 2016 03:09
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"You were saying?"
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Oct 7, 2016 03:50
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BIG HEADLINE posted:Good god the telegraph is huge this season. Kirk needs Lizzy's [insert vital organ here] to cure his otherwise incurable blood disease because while he is Lizzy's father, he's now the show's Arvin Sloane who will do anything to further his agenda, up to and including using his granddaughter as leverage to force his impudent daughter to give him her [insert vital organ here] so he can raise his granddaughter to be a proper heir to the ~evil empire~ he's created. I AM PSYCHIC! Or rather, the writers on this show are just *that* predictable... ...I also wrote this after the *first episode* of this season. >.> BIG HEADLINE fucked around with this message at 10:20 on Oct 7, 2016 |
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Oct 7, 2016 09:16
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everyone it was possible for this show yet again get more boring, risk-averse, and predictable, so here we are and it's worse and stupider than ever
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Oct 7, 2016 10:11
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TheRationalRedditor posted:everyone it was possible for this show yet again get more boring, risk-averse, and predictable, so here we are and it's worse and stupider than ever On the plus side, we got several lunch-sized portions of "this reminds me of a time..." stories!  I also think it's interesting that the writers - which we've established are terrible - didn't think to shoehorn in a part where Lizzy actually shows some backbone to take Red to task on the fact that since he interfered with Kirk's plans, instead of him using the virus to prolong his life, that now there's a very real possibility of him cramming her daughter into a juicer to strain out the fresh stem cells out of desperation. I also really wanted that exchange between the two of them to go thusly: Kirk: "It's because I'm the better man, Raymond." Red: "Maybe for now, because the writers don't know how to create drama or suspense any other way, but remember that I have the finest plot armor that money can buy. Hell, I'm pretty sure I could take a fifty caliber round in the gut at point blank range and be able to ~remember a time~ my way into not only surviving it, but not even end up having a scar. I know this *genius* plastic surgeon in Bonn, but...never mind, you were saying?" Kirk: "I still have my granddaughter, Raymond." Red: *chuckles amusedly* "You keep telling yourself that. Just remember, you're just the guy who played the real *and* fake Russian President in the first 'Hitman' movie, you know, the one no one remembers, not even Tim Olyphant? My 'meatspace' actor was Alan Shore, Robert California, and the guy from numerous films where every single woman in America wanted him inside her after watching them for a full *decade* afterwards. Of course, he still had ~hair~ for most of those roles, but he's still got a voice that's *liquid sex* in audible form. And if that isn't enough to convince you that I'm going to win, call up Peter Stormare and ask him what happened the last time a Scandinavian who'd work for a film credit and a few percentage points above scale got in my way. And on that note I have to bid you a fond farewell, I've got to bid on a signed first edition of 'Watership Down' for Agnes' coming-of-age party. I want to groom her for greatness and ruthlessness while she's young, and Orwell's 'Animal Farm' is just too...~pedestrian~." BIG HEADLINE fucked around with this message at 13:11 on Oct 7, 2016 |
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Oct 7, 2016 10:20
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Disturbingly my mind voice was reading that as James Spader.
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Oct 7, 2016 12:52
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WMain00 posted:Disturbingly my mind voice was reading that as James Spader. It's very pleasant to channel him.
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Oct 7, 2016 12:53
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BIG HEADLINE posted:It's very pleasant to channel him. Even his little exposition on why the word "chit" never seemed to gain traction in the English language (probably because it rhymes with a bad word) was amazing. I'm pretty sure everybody would trip over their dicks to get in line to have their cell phone numbers added to a special phone book if they knew that James Spader was going to read it aloud for a book on cassette.
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Oct 7, 2016 18:33
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tarlibone posted:Even his little exposition on why the word "chit" never seemed to gain traction in the English language (probably because it rhymes with a bad word) was amazing. "Hi, this is James Spader, doing the voice mail greeting for 212-555-6789. 'Chet' can't come to the phone right now, as my assistant currently has him dangling from his thumbs in an ancient Chinese torture technique thought lost to the ages save for my coming across an ~amazing~ acolyte of the practice in the Guizhou province in 1987. When I'm done extracting the information I need from him, I'll be sure to tell him you called, but leave your name and number at the sound of the scream in the meantime...you know, in case things get *heated* and I forget. Oh, and don't forget to watch 'The Blacklist' on NBC every Thursday at 10pm Eastern. I know I'm the only thing worth watching on it, but the other actors work so *hard*. Now, Chet, if you'd be so kind..." "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" "Good boy! We don't even have to do a second take!" *click*
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Oct 8, 2016 02:44
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I would pay large sums of money for this.
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Oct 8, 2016 09:59
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I think that if he ever falls on hard times, Spader has got the perfect Comicon gimmick. And yes, I would pay a substantial fee to have that as my voicemail message.
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Oct 8, 2016 10:03
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Spader is an intensely serious actor who hates being out in public by his own admission so he must really ,really like this steady paycheck to be on board for this dreck.
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Oct 8, 2016 10:25
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I just really find myself digging the idea of Spader's character in this show suddenly becoming "Benedict" from Last Action Hero with the ~Magic Ticket~. "Okay, I'm stumped on how to find this Red Mercury Superbomb Kirk is threatening to trigger the Yellowstone Caldera with, so let me just use this glowing novelty movie ticket I won in a villain's Baccarat tournament along with Aram's computer to bring up the writer's notes for future episodes...oh right...~SPOILER ALERT, PEOPLE~...hrmmm...oh for the love of...*ALIENS*? Seriously? And that guy from the History Channel has a cameo? What in the Cursed Name of Baal is a 'Meme Factor?' No...*nope*...that's not happening. Dembe, get me a cup of Kopi Luwak...if I'm going to clean up people's excrement I might as well drink something created from feces for inspiration." *proceeds to write better episodes from within the show's universe* "There. The state of Wyoming might cease to exist, but who the hell is going to notice? You know, this reminds me of a time when Saddam called me for advice on his romance novel. You see, I'd just finished supplying the Chechen militia with some Missile Crisis-era FROG-5 rockets and was making my way through the Levant on my way to meet with Hamas..." https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saddam_Hussein%27s_novels BIG HEADLINE fucked around with this message at 10:46 on Oct 8, 2016 |
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Oct 8, 2016 10:37
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| # ? Apr 25, 2024 01:16 |
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I wish the writers of this show had any idea why people watch the show. I'm so ready for Tom to go to his own soon-to-be-canceled shitfest spinoff, I just wish he would take Liz with him into television oblivion.  'member how great Spader was in Boston Legal? 'Member how great it was to have other competent actors on the show with him so that even the scenes without Spader were still pretty good?
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Oct 13, 2016 10:25
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