Quote-Unquote posted:

I don't understand the need to refer to themselves in the third person, and their inability to convey which person in the story 'he' or 'she' is actually referring to (is it the author, or one of the fictitious characters?) means I have to read each sentence multiple times in order to get even a basic idea of what's going on. And then I give up. It's amongst the worst creative writing I've ever read.

life is killing me posted:

Luckily for you, most of them seem to switch from third to first person halfway through a tale or sooner even, because they are so awful at writing that they can't stay consistent on that.

Bertrand Hustle posted:

The rule was that you were supposed to use "this troper" to qualify if you inserted your own opinion into an article, but because they're morons, they took it too far.

Maw posted:

I think it was some dumb rule where you weren't allowed to write about yourself but writing 'This Troper' meant you weren't writing about yourself anymore, although I can't find anything to back that up anywhere now.

Tunicate posted:

The original original rule was not to write anything in the first person.

Law Cheetah posted:

The "no I" rule was because they didnt want people talking about themselves in the main articles. People started writing "this troper" to get around it but it was still discouraged. Then I guess it became a meme or something because people still typed like that in troper tales, a place they set aside specifically for talking about yourself, so there was no reason for it anymore

Decrepus posted:

Didn't something like this happen in E/D with people starting posts with "I'm not a Darfur war orphan but..."

axolotl farmer posted:

That was just a way to make posters read the forum rules. For a while, if the OP didn't compare themselves with a Darfur war orphan, they got sent to kitty jail.

Decrepus posted:

Didn't something like this happen in E/D with people starting posts with "I'm not a Darfur war orphan but..."

Tunicate posted:

https://twitter.com/YAFantasyFan/status/803402391005622273

Tunicate posted:

https://twitter.com/YAFantasyFan/status/803402391005622273

Tunicate posted:

https://twitter.com/YAFantasyFan/status/803402391005622273

yeah I eat rear end posted:

If someone shouted at me calling me a different name and then started vibrating I think I'd get up and move. What is with people and the "literally shaking" stuff? You can convey that you were emotional without making yourself sound like a baby reacting like you had a near-death experience for doing something as mundane as saying hello to a stranger.

The Snoo posted:

I called out an rear end in a top hat at a mcdonalds for being a horrible jerk to the cashiers (called one a bitch for trying to explain to him why it took 'so long' for his food during the lunchtime rush) and I was shaking because I have exxxtreme anxiety also gently caress that guy

The Snoo posted:

I called out an rear end in a top hat at a mcdonalds for being a horrible jerk to the cashiers (called one a bitch for trying to explain to him why it took 'so long' for his food during the lunchtime rush) and I was shaking because I have exxxtreme anxiety also gently caress that guy

InediblePenguin posted:

I get the loving shakes if they hear me wrong at the loving register and I have to correct my order because my severe anxiety disorder remains unmedicated, tbh

I don't try and brag about it as if it shows how intensely I experience things or whatever these people think they're doing

quote:

This has happened to this troper twice; both times with the same younger cousin. About six months ago, I was house-sitting for my aunt and uncle while they were on a second honeymoon trip. They left instructions that my cousin (who had just turned 14) was allowed to go on dates as long as I was chaperoning. In addition, they basically gave me veto power over whom she was allowed to go out with. The night after they left, she said she wanted to go out with a guy she said she met over My Space whom she said was 16. I gave my tentative approval. While she was in the shower, the guy showed up. The guy in question was at least 6'3 and had a linebacker build. I invited him inside, gave him a soda, and casually asked him how old he was. "Eighteen," he pops right back at me. He seemed like a nice guy and he didn't try to hide his age, so I let him off easy saying that my cousin's parents probably wouldn't be happy seeing her go out with somebody in the quasi-legal category; he understood and left. I popped my head in the bathroom and told my cousin, "Sorry kiddo, you're date's canceled. If you don't give me a hard time about it I'll order a pizza and we can go rent a movie." It was hard to tell through the curtain, but I'm pretty sure she didn't mean most of what she said after that. "But if you do give me a hard time, I'll tell your mom and dad you're trying to jailbait yourself over the internet." She was alot more amicable afterwards....

quote:

I've never delivered this speech for my sister, since she hasn't yet started dating. However, I have honed my skills on speeches to several close friends love interests. To explain, I don't have many friends, even fewer close ones, and most of them are female. The first time I gave the speech the other guy didn't believe me, since I was 5'8 and nerdy, and he was 6'2 and a rugby player. When he hit her I tracked him down in the middle of a school day, waited until there were no teachers around, announced I was there, and proceeded to beat the tar out of him in an entirely fair fight. The second and third time I gave the speech, people believed me. The fourth time was in sixth form, to a new guy who didn't know me and din't believe me. The same thing happened, just in case people had forgotten what messing with my friends led to. Being motivated by righteous anger can really up your chances in a fight.

quote:

This Troper was once in an unfortunate relationship with a guy who, while he had his good moments, had bad ones almost whenever they were alone. Although Dad gave The Speech to every guy I dated, he had no reason to put action to words until then. Suffice it to say that when he found out the bruises weren't from hiking, he took his hunting rifle and a bag of loose change and paid said douche boyfriend a visit. Yes, he actually used a bag of coins. It broke during the 'talk' and he made the guy pick the change up and get a new bag. Did I mention he's former Air Force, now considered a 'New Age-y' intellectual?
The second time, I gave the speech to my younger sister, who was dating some prick from Theater Club. Granted, I always give them that speech, but - like my dad - I hadn't a time to use it, since my threat was more like an understated "Someday you'll probably break up with her, or she'll dump you. But if I find out that you've hurt her, hope that the cops find me before I find you." Since my sister's the collected, serious one, seeing her in tears hammered on my Berserk Button and I felt compelled to do something. Thus it was that this pacifistic Troper took up Mom's trusty hardwood bat and paid the boy a little visit after rehearsal. In my defense, he deserved it, and I did give him the chance to apologize. How was I to know he was playing play Marius the next day?

quote:

This troper took his sister's boyfriend outside for a while and gave him this speech. While this troper was chopping down a twenty foot oak tree with an ax. After felling it, this troper asked his sister's boyfriend to move the tree, which he failed at. Than this troper hauled and physically lifted the tree onto his shoulder to move it away. This troper simply told the boy friend to remember the tree if he ever hurt her.

quote:

This troper, as part of his plan to adapt a new, more Bishonen-like look for the new semester, highlighted his hair red; said hair was split down the center at the time, required extensive combing to get just right, and sometimes he just couldn't get it right, making styling his hair a Luck Based Mission. Then two of his friends recommended to Ray that he get a haircut to match his hair color. So they took him to a beauty salon that specializes in more "Asian" haircuts, where he got a new haircut consisting of a bang going towards his right and the back of his hair being upright and kinda spiky, and the friends he went with liked it. On top of that, it was easier to style and maintain than his old haircut. Sadly, out of the dozens of friends he has, only 4 people have commented on his new hairdo.

quote:

This troper is now no longer allowed to use weapons during mess-around sparing matches with his friends, due to his hobby of making DIY weapons that look like normal, mundane items. Such as a driving glove wired to a camera capacitor and some foil to act as a tazer glove, or using powdered sugar and a lighter to blow extremely low-heat fire. Honestly, it's more to see the look on their faces than for any type of effectiveness.

Khazar-khum posted:

Khazar-khum posted:

This has happened to this troper twice; both times with the same younger cousin.

Khazar-khum posted:

Haircuts

"Sadly, out of the dozens of friends he has"

System Metternich posted:

Every single one of these losers.

Fathis Munk posted:

That's make-up I think.

System Metternich posted:

Every single one of these losers.

poptart_fairy posted:

Isn't that a meme. I swear I've seen the same concept used with identical wording and set-ups before.

some tough cool troper posted:

Being motivated by righteous anger can really up your chances in a fight.