|
Solarin posted:OFFICIAL STATEMENT I'm An Internet Warlord too!
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 20:55
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 17, 2024 00:36 |
|
|
Paramemetic posted:Ground flooring this poo poo, now is my chance to be a top poster See, I think this whole thing was rigged. All the little loser non-posters bribed the mods to close the old thread so they could see their name in lights and not try to top the hours and hours of hard hard work by top tier shitposters like myself. Well, all I can say is enjoy it while it lasts, because Samizdata is here to gently caress you up and sit soundly in the middle of the pack, asshats!
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 20:55
|
|
|
Meridian posted:Don't worry, there are multiple in game ways to fix your mistake in game. …which funnily enough is almost the exact opposite of what's going on at CIG, where there are multiple games in which to make mistakes.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 20:56
|
|
|
moma I am currently drinking a 2012 c. montelena chardonnay with some cheap fish tacos thought you should know
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 20:57
|
|
|
ManofManyAliases posted:Has anyone said 'ManofManyAnuses' yet? Glad your parents are here to share in this new thread with you too.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:00
|
|
|
TheAgent posted:I started final fantasy a gaijin doubter I completed 7, 8 and 10 once, 12 three times (it was a christmas vacation ritual, once every years). I tried real hard to like 13 but the completely nonsensical plot and "bolted on rails" storyline made me quit after maybe 12-13 hours of gameplay. Does 15 somehow redeem 13 or is it just the same with prettyer graphics ?
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:00
|
|
|
Tippis posted:Yeah, I only bring up nVidia because of the 1993 connection and what we've arrived at today in terms of market share — the GeForce 256 didn't come out until, what? '98-'99:ish, and that was the end of the old 3D add-on cards — on-chip hardware T&L had arrived. Also, speaking of NVidia, and Voodoo, NVidia hired a lot of 3Dfx engineers, IIRC, and there is still some tech created by 3Dfx in modern day NVidia products.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:03
|
|
|
TheAgent posted:moma I am currently drinking a 2012 c. montelena chardonnay with some cheap fish tacos Nothing like some good Napa chardonnay to wash down mediocre-broiled fish tacos (I'm assuming broiled because I don't picture you much the fry-type).
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:07
|
|
|
here's my FF story I played the first one, 3, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 and 10 beat all of them but was meh/ugh for a few of them 13 I couldn't get through the first two hours, it was awful 15 starts off and you think "oh god more of this incomprehensible poo poo" but then your non homo bros are taking selfies and cooking fries and talking about you getting married to some vagina haver and suddenly the game is good?? cindy is obviously what every gay man hates about breeders so I can forgive that bit of subversive character design
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:07
|
|
|
Beet Wagon posted:
Also, gently caress Madcatz for killing Saitek, and leaving me with a perfectly functional Eclipse 3 I can't use under Windows 10.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:08
|
|
|
Oh hey, new thread. As a somewhat musician I have written over the last year some songs and parodies that traced events as they occurred to goons. Just to make it easier to find, here they all are, with lyrics where appropriate. Dancey Cat Hoedown Dancey Cat Hoedown Remix lyrics Fun hoedown but needs revision since SM keeps reappearing and disappearing. Everyone Asked Why RIP David Bowie. Monkey balls. Brand New Shitizen Brand New Shitizen Dark Remix lyrics New Order meets the Wurzels Chris of Parp lyrics RIP Leonard Cohen. See You In The Verse Commando Game loop earworm. CIG Cool immersion gameplay. Is cool, so cool. Snuff Citizen It's not a real game. When I'm Codin' Jpegs lyrics RIP George Formby. Star Harvest lyrics Reggae Neil Young. Mr Parpman lyrics RIP Andrew Sisters. Found A Parp lyrics RIP Talking Heads Ben The Stalker lyrics RIP Michael Jackson. Tainted Smart lyrics Everyone loves Derek Smart. Commandos Spacecatte Photon Smash Mix More game loop earworm. Parp lyrics You make jpegs to sell some poo poo. Toastman lyrics Speaking of poo poo, RIP Beatles. Immersion lyrics RIP Heaven 17 I Bought A Lot Of Ships To Get Where I Am lyrics You gotta buy some ship to get ahead. Right lyrics Derek Smart Is Right Refundin lyrics Imagine if the Hilltop Hoods were really poo poo and did covers. Rising Star Rising Star Addendum #1 lyrics RIP Lee Marvin. The Mess lyrics RIP Grandmaster Flash. Oh Chris Oh Chris Cinerama Stereo Mix lyrics Saint Chris, his miracles to perform. And to celebrate the new thread, a parody I did ages ago but never got around to releasing:  * lyrics * Fun, excitement, really wild things. * More RIP Beatles. * Cheesy synth. ewe2 fucked around with this message at 21:14 on Dec 2, 2016 |
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:09
|
|
|
TheAgent posted:here's my FF story Alright, I am sold.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:09
|
|
|
Samizdata posted:See, I think this whole thing was rigged. All the little loser non-posters bribed the mods to close the old thread so they could see their name in lights and not try to top the hours and hours of hard hard work by top tier shitposters like myself. Well, all I can say is enjoy it while it lasts, because Samizdata is here to gently caress you up and sit soundly in the middle of the pack, asshats! It was collusion I tell you! Except this new thread means I'm probably gonna lose my spot in the top five haha. Kayak is gonna be so disappointed in me!
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:10
|
|
|
ManofManyAliases posted:Nothing like some good Napa chardonnay to wash down mediocre-broiled fish tacos (I'm assuming broiled because I don't picture you much the fry-type). but fried fish tacos are miserable (unless from mutt lynches) so yeah
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:10
|
|
|
A Neurotic Corncob posted:https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/comments/5g4k5l/production_schedule_is_being_updated_260_release/ I love this loving useless tracker. 
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:16
|
|
|
cindy from the new FF is what japanese businessmen imagine the entire female population of the collegiate midwest looks like
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:16
|
|
|
TheAgent posted:here's my FF story So its like a stag party roadtrip with your crew before you go off to mary the princess ? If the main protagonist is more articulate than Cloud/Squall i could dig that.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:16
|
|
|
they kinda ain't wrong
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:17
|
|
|
Enchanted Hat posted:I love this loving useless tracker. 
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:17
|
|
|
aleksendr posted:So its like a stag party roadtrip with your crew before you go off to mary the princess ? If the main protagonist is more articulate than Cloud/Squall i could dig that. ...
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:18
|
|
|
Enchanted Hat posted:I love this loving useless tracker. Really?  Please make one of these every month. Make it a little bit slower frame to frame. It should be really something.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:19
|
|
|
nah Noct (pronounced knocked) is v verbal but they still do that weird japanese "uuuggghhhhhh??" emotion thing
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:20
|
|
|
Chalks posted:Just keep posting the good stuff and soon he'll have the whole thread on ignore That's okay. Derek can't ignore me. As one of his alts, I am the little nagging voice in the back of his head, making terrible jokes when he can't sleep, always there, always shitposting.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:20
|
|
|
TheAgent posted:... ...Whatever.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:21
|
|
|
Meridian posted:...Whatever.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:23
|
|
|
The Titanic posted:
I am so happy MS word decided A KITTEN should be in all caps because FAU was. Thank you Microsoft first the Xbox one and now this, thank you.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:25
|
|
|
TheAgent posted:nah Noct (pronounced knocked) is v verbal I prefer them doing what they are good at, even with some grating cultural differences, than have them try to be "west friendly" and result in another Spirit Within,
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:25
|
|
|
MoMA is steadily improving as a poster while Derek releases official statements instead of legally actionable blogs. You know what when Star Citizen is released to general acclaim I'll play with you MoMA
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:26
|
|
|
TheAgent posted:nah Noct (pronounced knocked) is v verbal like if someone cooked some fried shrimp I wouldn't gasp in shock but expect that when
so get used to it
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:25
|
|
|
This is true of some people, but I think a lot of us still would love to see the game to become something. I hope it does given the time and money sunk into it. Though what he's missing is that our "wait and see and laugh" costs $0.00. Where as supporting CIG is apparently in the millions per month. I don't think CIG is putting out millions of dollars of quality content per month to justify that, but that's just my opinion. 
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:28
|
|
|
MeLKoR posted:fifth_stimpire.txt I got your back, bra... Even if all I have is the Fourth... In the last 500 years, the Fourth Stimpire has dominated four systems, which it has united into one starzone, Stimsis. The Fourth Stimpire has origins from the Ten Empire War in which 10 of the United Stimpires revolted against each rules. All empires except for the fourth swore freedom upon their citizens. There is no free speech in the Fourth Stimpire, and all self-controlled transportation has been made illegal without undergoing painful medical verification methods, in which arteries are severed without pain resistant, operated entirely by machines. The way they work claim to be the most hygenic and healthy way possible, but these machines often rub against pain points, causing great deals of pain to patients. The heart is then extracted from the body and placed into a glass grinding machine. Various energy centers are also dissected and replaced with dangerous transplants. After the painful, 52 hour surgical procedure, patients will then have to use a fused guidance tool, which pumps painful resistors into the body every 2 hours. The pain they have caused is so bad, the victim would freeze in a tense position. They would then collapse afterwards. Sexual stimulation in any way within the grounds of the Fourth Stimpire is strictly prohibited, and anyone detected even touching their sexual organs will be subjected to a penectomy or if the offender was a female, they would then have a razor inserted into their ovaries. They would pump a blue solution into the womb until the stitchings burst. Offenders would also be forced to show their operated areas in public, and they would always harass and punch them to a pulp, against their will. Otherwise, offenders would be tazed with the worst type of electricity in the systematic district, causing so much pain, the victim would scream and flail in madness. The pain would also triple every second, but no death would be incurred. This is also used in combat against enemy units, which is why all UEE forces must wear the upgraded suit to block this effect. However, enertainment is also questionable in UEE grounds. Sporting events end with the losing team being rounded into a grinder and shredded on live television, boxing matches end with the loser having their hands removed without anasthesia, flight races would end with the losers having their arms and legs removed, then being injected with insanity, for entertainment. People are also forced into these events, by undergoing a painful 127 hour procedure which involves tweaking the muscles so they will not listen to brain commands, and then having a painful drug injected which also causes madness if the player is not sporting. This is all for entertainment, and anyone not watching any of it during sporting times and cheering for the winning team, they will be imprisoned into galactic camps. Snuff films are also broadcast, and actors are actually murdered just for entertainment. Stealth droids also guide these forced actors into behaving exactly as the director dreams, otherwise they will be punished by being placed into a macerator and having their execution written into the film. Any film that does not feature someone being murdered will be burned and the entire crew behind it will be executed in the most grotesque way possible - vivisection. All executions are broadcast, and anyone who misses even a millisecond, even by blinking, will be executed. All citizens must boo to the person being executed, and the family is gathered to be injected with eternators, which cause pain forever, making them immoral but feeling the pain tenfold every millisecond. They cannot pass out, but they will feel like it forever. Conquests by this Stimpire end in the planet being razed, and all the citizens being executed in the same way as their citizens are. The planet is then destroyed and all remnants of it are removed, and any memories of it will be erased instantly from civil minds. People who are also killed are also erased from memories, and all memories of them, including toys and pictures, are destroyed. Prisoners undergo 40,000 years of relentless and endless labor, and anyone not complying is sentenced to the eternator injection. All prisoners injected with eternators are placed into capsules and launched into far space, then the room is closed tight to ensure maximum insanity. Some prisoners are also subjected to the removal of blood, the lungs, the liver, the genitals, the skeleton, the muscles, the eyes, and even the injection of pressure. Prisoners sentenced to pressure chambers are locked in until they are inflated to a high level. The decompression is then stopped to make sure they are inflated and uncomfortable. Children born on the 14th of July are subjected to the removal of their skeleton and an implant of a silver liquid to replace it. The nervous sysem is also injected in various parts to ensure it is five times more sensitive than the average. Restaurants also are ordered to serve civil meat, and anyone attending must give themself up to be cooked into a grotesque meal. They are cooked alive, undergoing extreme pain, and are then subjected to industrial grinders and blenders. The Stimpire orders at least 1 million citizens to be dispatched every day, as they are afraid the population may overthrow them. But only one planet is cared for, and the rest are banned from eating, drinking, talking, using technology, touching anyone, wearing unauthorized clothes, touching buildings, or walking a centimeter out of designated routes. Civil enforcers are on every planet, and they are engineered so that they are 40 times larger than the 300 quadrillion population. At least 7 billion die every 12 hours under this rule. Thoughts are also surveyed, and anyone who does not think anything to loving the Stimpire with more than their capabilities will be sentenced to a prison. Prisoners who are punished for this violation will meet their greatest fear, only to have it amplified so they will turn insane as they imagine it exactly as they fear it. They then undergo a painful extraction of all fluids, to be replaced by a toxin which causes permanent irritation. The unknown substance keeps the subject aging normally, except they will never die. Prisoners punished in this way are unable to be reverted, despite many efforts, and they will never be able to be disposed. The sickening truths have been revealed only today, and invigilation teams are still investigating the truths without setting foot in the galactic space of this sickening empire.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:29
|
|
|
also the titanic and rasolokinividndhd I hope you don't mind if I go full hentai nosebleed at the next citcon when I meet sandi :3
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:30
|
|
|
Also...   says PAAAAAAAAAARP!
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:31
|
|
|
Ayn Marx posted:MoMA is steadily improving as a poster while Derek releases official statements instead of legally actionable blogs. You know what when Star Citizen is released to general acclaim I'll play with you MoMA I would proudly serve in MoMA's Javelin while he storm's a pirate outpost. I'd sell you all out in the blink of an eye.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:33
|
|
|
that new thread smell
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:33
|
|
|
It's a pity Chris didn't stick with the achievable while detailing his fantasy game wishlist. 
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:33
|
|
|
we still don't have proof of life for star marine lol aww
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:35
|
|
|
Drunk Theory posted:Also, call your parents. I called my mum. Also, I saved your gif in my collection of SC pics.
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:36
|
|
|
currently slamming flan while sipping $40/shot tequila life is good
|
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:36
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 17, 2024 00:36 |
|
|
EmesiS posted:The last 500 years I'll study them later to extract further prophecies on SC. Edit: taxxe: 
Beexoffel fucked around with this message at 21:40 on Dec 2, 2016 |
|
#
?
Dec 2, 2016 21:37
|
|