quote:

[deleted]

Lockback posted:

quote:

I also suggested an open relationship, and she was disgusted by that. Her exact words were "Why even bother be dating then? I might as well just call you my fuckbuddy instead of my boyfriend." Irony, right?

54 40 or gently caress posted:

I think I'm sensible in my appeals to the divine by saying I'm perfectly fine even with winning just 10 grand. Hoping my modesty will grant me good things

Panfilo posted:

What is the deal with people whose partners suddenly do some kind of 180? Like for instance the ones that suddenly become religious, join a cult, become vegan, become obsessed with something to the detriment of their relationship, etc?

It makes more sense to me that a person starts out into something and ropes their partner into it. Having one partner suddenly change without any warning sounds more unusual than it seems to be. The person has a partner who isn't enmeshed in whatever subculture they're getting immersed, which I would assume would give some kind of passive pushback. All I can figure is that the person had warning signs they were prone to it but their partner ignored them the whole time. A lot of testimonials born again Christians give, for example talk about their life hitting rock bottom in some kind of way. Wouldn't the other partner know about that?

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

the balls on that lady goddamn

1st AD posted:

People communicate/listen poorly and are oblivious.

100 degrees Calcium posted:

Her boyfriend is a doormat.

Pick posted:

I know earlier I said "Don't cheat", but there's an important complementary rule, "Dump cheaters."

Panfilo posted:

So you think the changes in the other partner were more gradual than the poster lets on?

My own parents got divorced when I was young and my mom always emphasized what a shock it was for her to discover that my dad had cheated on her. As I got older and more cynical I started to press her about that fact because my dad is a very quiet guy and I had wondered if maybe he had been checked out of the marriage for a long time. He never gave me a straight answer either, his reasoning for cheating on my mom with his best friends pregnant wife was "I don't know."

JacquelineDempsey posted:

So I don't read Reddit (I hate the way it's formatted), but am totally engrossed in this thread (thanks, ladychat ).

Half of these start with "throwaway because my SO is a redditor", and then they launch into the most bizarre stories that give specifics on age and gender and situations right in the title. Like, if my husband was a goon and I was posting over in e/n "my [42F] husband [46M] digs his own poop out with a pencil", he wouldn't come across that and think, "hmm, I'M 46, and my wife is 42, and I dig my own poop out with a pencil. But, gosh, that's not her username. Surely this can't be about us."

If you're both hardcore redditors, what's the point of a parachute? Do they just stupidly assume that even though they're having relationship problems, the other person isn't entertaining the idea of reading and/or posting in r/relationships? Do these ever blow up when the other party stumbles upon them? I've seen it happen on SA, just wondering if any of these have had spectacular trainwrecks like the Bill Maher Bang Bus saga here.

JacquelineDempsey posted:

So I don't read Reddit (I hate the way it's formatted), but am totally engrossed in this thread (thanks, ladychat ).

Half of these start with "throwaway because my SO is a redditor", and then they launch into the most bizarre stories that give specifics on age and gender and situations right in the title. Like, if my husband was a goon and I was posting over in e/n "my [42F] husband [46M] digs his own poop out with a pencil", he wouldn't come across that and think, "hmm, I'M 46, and my wife is 42, and I dig my own poop out with a pencil. But, gosh, that's not her username. Surely this can't be about us."

If you're both hardcore redditors, what's the point of a parachute? Do they just stupidly assume that even though they're having relationship problems, the other person isn't entertaining the idea of reading and/or posting in r/relationships? Do these ever blow up when the other party stumbles upon them? I've seen it happen on SA, just wondering if any of these have had spectacular trainwrecks like the Bill Maher Bang Bus saga here.

HardDiskD posted:

I hope you get your no strings attached 10k.

JacquelineDempsey posted:

So I don't read Reddit (I hate the way it's formatted), but am totally engrossed in this thread (thanks, ladychat ).

Half of these start with "throwaway because my SO is a redditor", and then they launch into the most bizarre stories that give specifics on age and gender and situations right in the title. Like, if my husband was a goon and I was posting over in e/n "my [42F] husband [46M] digs his own poop out with a pencil", he wouldn't come across that and think, "hmm, I'M 46, and my wife is 42, and I dig my own poop out with a pencil. But, gosh, that's not her username. Surely this can't be about us."

If you're both hardcore redditors, what's the point of a parachute? Do they just stupidly assume that even though they're having relationship problems, the other person isn't entertaining the idea of reading and/or posting in r/relationships? Do these ever blow up when the other party stumbles upon them? I've seen it happen on SA, just wondering if any of these have had spectacular trainwrecks like the Bill Maher Bang Bus saga here.

54 40 or gently caress posted:

And I hope some no strings attached lottery winnings come your way as well!


I wonder what the point of even saying "throwaway because they know I'm a Redditor" and "names changed" even is. Just do it.

Lockback posted:

A literal doormat gained sentience, found a terrible girlfriend, and posted on reddit.

Trigger Warning: Slightly sad? They guy realizes the situation sucks but has super low self esteem, but he says he is ugly and boring so maybe he just knows whats up.

I [23M] know that logically I should break up with my girlfriend [19F] of six months but I don't see "better" coming out of it


I mean, I could have bolded the entire thing really.

Charles Get-Out posted:

This dude is way too young to be pulling the "I'm a sack of poo poo with no redeeming value" card and it's kind of sad.

quote:

So, I love coffee. I drink it every morning and like trying out new cafes. When my boyfriend and I were long-distance he agreed he'd try it with me. It excited me because it's something I really enjoy. When we finally met IRL a couple years ago, things changed. Not only did the pet names and verbal affection decline, but he decided he'd rather not try coffee because it didn't appeal to him.

I accepted it. It didn't matter much compared to the fact that he was now calling me LDRCoffeeAddict instead of sweetheart, honey, baby, etc. which was a bit of a shock. When we discussed the issue he said he felt awkward saying those things in person. "Over the phone there was a buffer," he'd say. I always knew he had intimacy issues (e.g. refuses to hug his mom) but I didn't realize it would change our relationship so much.

He now says sweet things but in a less romantic way. He'll say "You're my girl" once in a blue moon or tell me "I like hanging out with you," etc. No more pet names or compliments.

Earlier we discussed us sharing a cup of coffee. He responded with "We'll see" and then stated "I just don't want to try coffee." It upset me. I explained it was about more than just the coffee; it was about his willingness to try things with me that I enjoy. His response was that he did plenty of things I wanted to do (i.e. watch movies I like, try cuisines I enjoy, etc.) and that he didn't see drinking coffee as a big deal but ultimately agreed he'd try it if it meant that much to me.

The agreement to drink coffee was something I held onto. He let go of the pet names and stopped referring to me as "Beautiful". The willingness to sip a mug of coffee with me was all I had left from that time and he tried to get rid of that too.

Can anyone offer a different perspective? It's incredibly hurtful I practically had to start crying for it to register how important it is to me. I'd like to hear that perhaps I'm overreacting but any response would be appreciated.

TLDR: LDR boyfriend was resistant to trying coffee with me despite previously agreeing to it before meeting in person.

WAY TO GO WAMPA!! posted:

quote:

Pregnancy/childbirth. Because gently caress that, that's why!

I may be bipolar like my dad and bipolar disorder is sometimes hereditary. Not gonna take the chance.

I love holding newborn babies (so tiny and fragile...), but I have no patience for any child between the ages of 3 months to 8 years, depending on how bratty the kid is.
Overpopulation. Look at New York, China, India, all the big cities. The filth. Need I say more?

Bullying. I may have been home-schooled, but that doesn't mean I didn't face with some mean kids. In this day and age, with girls as young as 8 to 10 years old becoming anorexic because of fat-shaming from bullies, haha yeah, I'm not giving bully brats more bait to push around. -.-

Look at how many kids are in foster care and orphanages. If I ever, at any point in my life, end up getting a kid, I'm adopting.

My mom having a new baby when I was 13 (kid's now 4 years old) just solidified my reasons to be CF. I can't take diapers, potty training, baby slobber, etc. And I am NOT wiping another human's rear end, thank you.

I don't need someone to take care of me when I'm older. Doubt they'd care anyway. Don't believe me? Look at the homes for the elderly. My hometown is a tiny little place, and there are 3 homes for elderly people. Used to go caroling around the holidays, and the places would be empty, save for the employees and residents. Now tell me that people really do care for their elderly family members, because it looks more like they're just waiting for the old to die. :/

I'm planning on fostering/adopting animals from shelters, and there's no telling which ones will be child friendly or not. There is no animal discrimination on my watch, so I don't care if the animal's an ex-fighting pitbull, I'm welcoming the pooch with open arms. Kids will just have to stay out.

I just don't like certain sounds (baby/child crying, chewing, those loving kiddy songs in cartoons....HELL NO) and I get pissed easy...
If I didn't live with my Christian family (including the 4 year old sibling I mentioned before), I'd be swearing up and down like a sailor. Regardless of how mature you think your kid is, I don't think a kid should have to hear R rated language at such a young age. Just sayin'.

Money. Kids cost a poo poo-ton of cash just to care for. That money could be used to keep myself out of debt and to care for future furbabies.

People definitely will bingo me. Tell me I'll change my mind, etc.

I'll just become more determined to prove them wrong.

quote:

How can I [39F] prevent a local elected official [60sM] from barging in on my piano gig?

I work for a small municipality and I also happen to play piano. My first year here, I randomly started playing Christmas songs on the piano where we held our employee Christmas luncheon, so for the past 11 years, I've been asked to provide mood music for that event.

My set is basically all David Lanz, who is a New Age solo pianist. Imagine floaty, relaxing piano music.. beautiful stuff!

Last year, one of our council members brought his tenor sax. I learned of this only when he started playing while I was in the middle of playing! It was loud and terrible! He tried to play along with me, but New Age piano solo music is not exactly conducive to accompaniment because it's not straightforward melodies. Also, the sax is tuned to a different pitch than piano, so to play piano music you have to transpose (play a different note than what's written), which is a skill that not everyone has!

In other words, you would have to be one drat fine musician to pull off what he did - and he isn't! Not to mention how RUDE it is to step into another musician's performance without consulting with them first!!

Afterwards, I got all kinds of comments saying how weird and awful it was. I told Councilman that we should get together next year so we can put together something nice. That hasn't happened (and frankly, I'm not interested, though I would have done if he had initiated contact about it).

Our luncheon is next week and I have no idea if he plans to bring his sax or not. I don't know how to relay the message that I do not want him to! I feel way, way too awkward to contact him directly. Would it be appropriate to confide in our City Manager (with whom I'm more comfortable, but it would still be awkward) and let him be gatekeeper?

How should I phrase this request and not come off like a prima donna?

TL;DR - A higher up barged in on my piano performance last year. How can I make sure it doesn't happen this year?

Bonster posted:

I wonder how many Childfree people are literally children themselves. That poster was 17, which seems about the right age to be absolutely certain that you know everything and have it all figured out. It's a little less obnoxious when it's coming from teenagers.

Gaunab posted:

I think this is pretty funny

Bonster posted:

I wonder how many Childfree people are literally children themselves. That poster was 17, which seems about the right age to be absolutely certain that you know everything and have it all figured out. It's a little less obnoxious when it's coming from teenagers.

Better Fred Than Dead posted:

Coffee has to be heroin. Wtf else