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we're here in my Designated 300 Rant Zone, where I talk about how Frank Miller is a worthless human being and all the white dorks that chortled over their popcorn and jumbo sodas while THE BROWN TIDE was reversed should have their dicks agonizingly manually ripped off by Mandy Patinkin & F. Murray Abraham (VERY, VERY SLOWLY)
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May 9, 2017 17:28
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Punkin Spunkin posted:I'm sure they exist out there but people who hate BvS but give 300 a single inch of slack should be thrown over cliffs like babies being murdered by a fundamentally worthless slaveholding culture of hicks that never gave the world anything of value other than machismo fetishism for the last X hundred years and totally got owned by 300 Thebans picturing your avatar's face as you make this post
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May 9, 2017 17:28
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The Vosgian Beast posted:picturing your avatar's face as you make this post
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May 9, 2017 17:28
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Punkin Spunkin posted:we're here in my Designated 300 Rant Zone, where I talk about how Frank Miller is a worthless human being and all the white dorks that chortled over their popcorn and jumbo sodas while THE BROWN TIDE was reversed should have their dicks agonizingly manually ripped off by Mandy Patinkin & F. Murray Abraham (VERY, VERY SLOWLY) That's really... specific. Why those 2?
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May 9, 2017 17:38
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sean10mm posted:That's really... specific. incidentally the first movie I saw with 300-style CG blood was Kitano's Zatoichi and holy poo poo did it nearly ruin that movie https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ZhnS45Zexo
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May 9, 2017 17:42
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It's good.
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May 9, 2017 19:59
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Jupin's McDonald's story was hilarious. Also surprised that Fassbender was that one dude. His and Butler's career trajectories sure diverged a whole hell of a lot.
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May 9, 2017 20:04
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GrandpaPants posted:Jupin's McDonald's story was hilarious. I would've guessed that Fassbender would have been the guy doing romantic comedies, not action movies.
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May 9, 2017 20:06
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What if Mads Mikkelsen has just secretly wanted to be the lead in a romantic comedy his whole career
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May 9, 2017 20:31
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The Vosgian Beast posted:What if Mads Mikkelsen has just secretly wanted to be the lead in a romantic comedy his whole career He'd do wonderfully.
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May 9, 2017 21:23
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The Vosgian Beast posted:What if Mads Mikkelsen has just secretly wanted to be the lead in a romantic comedy his whole career This is pretty much Hannibal.
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May 9, 2017 22:27
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I may have seen Sucker Punch and BvS but I can choose to avoid any of Snyder film including 300 and the upcoming Justice League I mean drat, I really regret seeing BvS. I totally relate to Andrew's story about going to Lady In The Water and being tricked yet again.
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May 10, 2017 03:05
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The Diary of Zack Snyder posted:EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A BLU RAY DISC INTO THE SLOT. ITS 300 AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, LEONIDAS. I DO EVERY MOVE AND I DO EVERY MOVE HARD. MAKIN WHOOSHING SOUNDS WHEN I SLAM DOWN SOME BROWN BASTARDS OR EVEN WHEN I MESS UP TECHNIQUE. NOT MANY CAN SAY THEY ALMOST SURVIVED THE WORLD'S MOST LOPSIDED BATTLE. I CAN. I SAY IT AND I SAY IT OUTLOUD EVERYDAY TO PEOPLE IN MY FANTASY FOOTBALL LEAGUE AND ALL THEY DO IS PROVE PEOPLE IN FANTASY FOOTBALL LEAGUES CAN STILL BE IMMATURE HOMOS. AND IVE LEARNED ALL THE LINES AND IVE LEARNED HOW TO MAKE MYSELF AND MY APARTMENT LESS LONELY BY SHOUTING EM ALL. 2 HOURS INCLUDING WIND DOWN EVERY MORNIng
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May 10, 2017 04:33
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When I went to see 300 in theaters there was a dude sitting in the row directly in front of me, and I have never seen someone run so hot-and-cold on a movie in my entire life. 90% of the time he would be sitting there bored out of his mind, slumped in his chair with his cheek in his palm. But every time - and I mean every time - the movie would ramp up and start showing scenes that were featured in the trailer ("Tonight we dine in hell," or whatever), he would lean forward and, like, start headbanging. Long-winded discussions about mortality? Senate shenanigans? He was dead. But the second that fat baby monster with metal crab claws came on screen, my dude Stargated into his very own mosh pit.
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May 10, 2017 04:42
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Wilford Brimley! 
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May 10, 2017 08:04
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The Vosgian Beast posted:What if Mads Mikkelsen has just secretly wanted to be the lead in a romantic comedy his whole career I dunno if he's been the lead in a romantic comedy, but he's done comedic roles and romantic roles before in Danish films.
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May 10, 2017 08:37
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I just read an article on Alex Jones that said one of the major advertisers on his radio show is Harry's, the shaving company. So I guess he and WHM share some demographics. 300 was at least watchable, and the dumb fist-pumping bro propaganda is at least a valid way to film a story that's been used as propaganda for thousands of years. I'd probably put it behind Watchmen on Snyder's filmography, but I'm not watching his stupid DC movies.
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May 10, 2017 09:27
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it's grotesque racist bullshit trash about a million times worse than anything Zack Snyder can do to Batman or Batman can do to anyone. the fact that it's propaganda or a "Story that's been told" doesn't really change that in any substantial way. watch as the ancient Greeks (who looked like???), transformed into An Army of Whites Defending Against the Eastern Asiatic Hordes battle ancient Persians (who looked like???), transformed into Arabs, Black Dudes, Literal Monsters, Gay Panic Dhalsim, the Disabled, and with the support of Anti-War Politicians. its the sort of nascent toxic infantilism & worldview whose nihilism goes beyond bush era stupidity, and would later infect an entire generation of white manbaby gamer people... this is the real poo poo. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NTAgTCXja4Q and it's so topsy-turvy because you've got this fascist completely twisted society that relies on often senseless brutality and slave ownership of a majority of the population and you've got this cosmopolitan ultra empire famous for real military conquest, promoting human rights and religious freedom at comparatively unheard of levels (often even when compared to modern societies), and...oh yeah, not really having slaves. oh yeah there was also the whole Cyrus freeing the Jews and getting namechecked as a messiah in the Bible thing. it's like getting media where the Confederates are portrayed as plucky heroic underdo-oh yeah I guess we do get those. It's like if the movie inside of Inglorious Basterds was a real movie. why can't we get a movie on these guys. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sacred_Band_of_Thebes https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Tegyra just cuz it's been a lie for a long time or that racial fetishists have been distorting and jerking off to it for thousands of years doesn't mean it's cool. it's hosed up and dumb and so is frank miller. the Spartans sucked. Where were they during Marathon? Oh yeah. They didn't even always win their wars and they created a society twisted and hosed up to the point of insanity for that purpose. at least the Athenians left the world things and thoughts of value.
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May 10, 2017 09:47
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Count Chocula posted:I just read an article on Alex Jones that said one of the major advertisers on his radio show is Harry's, the shaving company. So I guess he and WHM share some demographics. People who shave?
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May 10, 2017 14:13
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Count Chocula posted:I just read an article on Alex Jones that said one of the major advertisers on his radio show is Harry's, the shaving company. So I guess he and WHM share some demographics. Follow the money....
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May 10, 2017 14:29
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I think this episode just became my go-to to introduce people to the show. Andrew: "If I ever have to choose between 300 and Sucker Punch, just put a bullet in my teeth" Steve: "What's the BTK Killer up to?"
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May 10, 2017 14:37
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Punkin Spunkin posted:it's grotesque racist bullshit trash about a million times worse than anything Zack Snyder can do to Batman or Batman can do to anyone. the fact that it's propaganda or a "Story that's been told" doesn't really change that in any substantial way. That sure is a lot of words to say that it was written by Frank Miller, racist idiot. But I too am repeating myself.
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May 10, 2017 15:25
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300 worked for me in the same way Starship Troopers did.
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May 10, 2017 15:31
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I don't understand why people say the movie was homophobic, if anything it's homoerotic. It's certainly the gayest thing I've seen in a theater.
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May 10, 2017 15:33
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One of the heroes dismisses the Athenians as boy-lovers which is exactly as funny as it sounds considering the 'spartan lifestyle'.
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May 10, 2017 15:41
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well why not posted:One of the heroes dismisses the Athenians as boy-lovers which is exactly as funny as it sounds considering the 'spartan lifestyle'. Yeah true but that's more a comment on pederasty
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May 10, 2017 15:43
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well why not posted:One of the heroes dismisses the Athenians as boy-lovers which is exactly as funny as it sounds considering the 'spartan lifestyle'. Boy lovers is calling Athenians pedophiles, which is why the Spartans look down on them so. Dump democracy lovers just can't appreciate a nice, glistening, slab of man meat.
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May 10, 2017 15:45
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Pederasty was something the Athenians and Spartans were both into
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May 10, 2017 15:50
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Drunkboxer posted:Yeah true but that's more a comment on pederasty yeah true, they're not identical - my bad. The stuff with Xerxes being gay panic Dhalsim is more the point. It's definitely intentionally designed to make homophobes uncomfortable which I think is actually kinda clever.
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May 10, 2017 15:56
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The Vosgian Beast posted:Pederasty was something the Athenians and Spartans were both into Yes, but the movie portrays the Spartans as people who don't do that. Also they aren't brutal slave owners who terrorize their slaves for fun and training. Plus apparently they are totally down with the democracy. One might go so far as to say that Frank Miller didn't actually know poo poo about either Ancient Greece or Ancient Persia and just wrote some masturbatory justification for his racism.
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May 10, 2017 16:01
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300 is an adaptation of the first two or three sentences of Thermopylae's wiki page.
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May 10, 2017 16:16
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well why not posted:300 is an adaptation of the first two or three sentences of Thermopylae's wiki page. It's an adaptation of his vague childhood memories of the film The 300 Spartans
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May 10, 2017 16:29
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....Did anyone expect historical accuracy from this movie? like, at any time?
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May 10, 2017 16:48
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God no. It's still funny to talk about.
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May 10, 2017 16:51
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enigmahfc posted:....Did anyone expect historical accuracy from this movie? like, at any time? A lot of people did, bafflingly.
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May 10, 2017 16:54
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I convinced my wife (girlfriend at the time) to see 300 in theaters by calling it historical fiction. I'm kind of still paying for that. Rightly so.
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May 10, 2017 18:02
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300 is a documentary, bravely filmed on the front lines amongst rampaging rhinoceroses and hunchbacks.
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May 10, 2017 18:16
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It's not about the idea of historical fantasy not being entirely accurate or going into the film expecting accuracy, it's how it was inaccurate, it's the fact that it's fascist racist Defender Against the Eastern Hordes garbage for white kids to fetishize and obviously a lot of those grown up kids still have the soft spot to apologize for it. "It's propaganda!", "What, u were expecting historical accuracy?" "Turn off ur brain broooooo" Like, the rhinos and poo poo weren't the main issue here Miiiight be more the whole "let's turn the Ancient Greek ancient Persian battle into a white race-swarthy race divide" than the loving fireballs and poo poo Punkin Spunkin fucked around with this message at 18:38 on May 10, 2017 |
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May 10, 2017 18:35
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Punkin Spunkin posted:Miiiight be more the whole "let's turn the Ancient Greek ancient Persian battle into a white race-swarthy race divide" than the loving fireballs and poo poo For your own sanity, never read Holy Terror. Although, really, nobody should read Holy Terror.
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May 10, 2017 18:45
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I cant wait until the Chinese are funding and exporting blockbusters into western mainstream culture depicting Hordes of literally disfigured and bestial Gingers and pale white ghost devil men invading various spaces like a human plague. See how easy it is to turn your brain off I guess they already are & they blow but it'll be fun in like 2050 telling triggered white dudes to just chill cuz it's a coooooooomic booooook brooo duuuuude
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May 10, 2017 18:45
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