Haifisch posted:

Everyone knows only poors listen to mainstream pop music.

Jerry Cotton posted:

A normal person would have just written Dvorak; I mean no-one says "I like Ludwig van Beethoven". Possibly he doesn't know Dvořák is pretty main-stream because he just Googled up composers.

e: What I mean is: he probably has never listened to Dvořák or at least doesn't know if he has.

Tumblr nonsense posted:

Story Time!

I wore a Captain America t-shirt the other day, a shirt I got at Gamestop on sale. It features a vintage cover of a Cap comic and it’s one of my favorite shirts. I wore it to work and then needed to go to Micro Center (local computer store) to buy a new video card for my PC.

So I’m walking around Micro Center with my husband, who is infinitely smarter about computers than I am (considering I work in IT) and we’re trying to find a better, but cost effective video card and this guy, who looks like he walked out of King of the Hill and who, I kid you not, somehow smelled of pizza and Mountain Dew, glances over at me and with a stupid smirk on his face says, “Bet you can’t name one Golden Age Captain America title.”

Now, don’t get me wrong. I know the rampant trends of shaming female comic book and video game fans are a real thing but I have been wearing DC and Marvel shirts for a very long time and never had someone actually call me on it, least of all in public. My first reaction was to roll my eyes and ignore him. My husband turned his head and said, “Excuse me?” in a rather loud voice, but I decided to embrace this “teaching moment” and turned to him.

I smiled politely and nodded. “I’ll tell you what,” I told him. “I’ll name five Golden Age titles if you can tell me, in a clear and concise way, how to find a woman’s G-spot.”

The look on his face would have been enough to make me turn around, satisfied that I’d shut him up, but I wanted to drive my point home, because gently caress that guy, right?

So I stepped toward him and said, “Can you?”

By now, a store employee had stepped into the aisle to pull something from the shelves and overheard my licentious question. Mr. Mountain Dew gaped silently, like a fish out of water and I waited patiently, the same smile on my face. After a minute of silence, I said, “Nothing?”

Mountain Dew finally found his voice and said, “What the hell does that have to do with Captain America?”

“We’ll get to that in a minute,” I said. “First, I want you to clarify something. Do you like women?”

Once again, he was speechless but eventually said, “Yes,” in a defiant, indignant tone.

“Interesting,” I said. “Now correct me if I’m wrong, but your demand that I name a Captain America title was intended to prove that I was somehow impersonating a comic book fan by daring to wear this shirt in broad daylight, am I right?”

Silence. So I continued.

“But if I apply the same logic to you, it could be said that you’re impersonating a heterosexual male, because after all, why should you be allowed to gently caress women if you don’t know how to do it properly?”

I didn’t wait for him to answer. I grabbed my video card, paid, and left and now, I wear that Cap shirt with a sense of victory I didn’t have before.

YA BOY ETHAN COUCH posted:

The keyboard guy made music?

Chef Bourgeoisie posted:

Bet you can’t name one Golden Age Captain America title.

quote:

if you can tell me, in a clear and concise way, how to find a woman’s G-spot.

brylcreem posted:

Insert your middle finger into the vagina, with your palm facing up, then bend the finger upwards. That's (supposedly) the G-spot.

Verisimilidude posted:

Zelder posted:

When the moon hits your eye like a big Nazi pie, that's a hate crime

Reddit: That Happened posted:

Fathis Munk posted:

Nazi or not, why would you just gratuitously scribble a swastika and a pie chart on some menu

I mean maybe I just can't understand because I'm not a nazi but...

Zipperelli. posted:

If I had to guess, I'd imagine the pie chart is a nod to the "1%ers." Generally speaking, motorcycle gangs have a lot of tie-ins with white nationalists.

Trebek posted:

sweeperbravo posted:

Imagine pressing each emoji that many times. You can't just press and hold down that poo poo, that's a conscious decision.

sweeperbravo posted:

Imagine pressing each emoji that many times. You can't just press and hold down that poo poo, that's a conscious decision.

Trebek posted:

Probably the type of dedication I would look for in a head stripper tbh

Piell posted:

Maybe the head stripper just wears a lot of hats and takes them off seductively

idiot posted:

I love loving with people on the internet, Its fun. Back before Chris Hanson I used to act like a 15 year old girl in chat rooms, I'd be with some friends and we'd go where I told the guy to meet "me". That's a story for another nigbt.

idiot posted:

Ok so back when Yahoo chat was popular I used to gently caress random women easy as hell, when I wasn't trying to get waffleswaffleswaffleswaffleswaffles I'd use another name like bubblygurl14 or something else that sounded really young. I wouldn't even have to type anything and I'd have 15 guys talking to me. I'd play the I'm under age but really like older guys and wont tell anyone routine, the guys ate it up.

So guys wanted to meet "me", and I was really curious if these guys were serious and would actually show up, so I started telling them I'd meet them at a corner store by my house. Sure as poo poo dudes would be sitting in the parking lot in the car they said they would be in. I'd drive by them then go home and send them a message that I was a 19 hear old dude and that they are disgusting pieces of poo poo. After a while that got old so I decided that walking up to them would be more fun. Sometimes I'd chew them out for being a perv sometimes I'd act gay and tell them that I act like a girl so I can get some older man action. That got boring after a while too so then I started to find out what cars 2 guys were driving and I'd tell them that I would be in the other guys car. I'd already be in the parking lot, one guy would roll up and when the other guy would come up and park next to the car expecting a girl.

Sometimes they would just take off, sometimes they would yell at each other, once they got into a fight. That gave me an idea of getting some friends together and setting these guys up at night. The car would be sitting in the parking lot and id park up the block and we'd get out with bats and pipes. We'd beat the tail lights off the car, smash the windows in, spray paint pervert on the car, and quite a few times we beat the guy up.

I don't feel bad for doing it, I didn't think the cops would arrest them and at that age i didnt really want to bring the man into my life. I just hope that maybe them getting beat up or exposed stopped them from messing with kids or possibly saved the life of a little girl.

BraveUlysses posted:

from a car forum:

life is killing me posted:

This sounds like a To Catch a Predator episode, except with more vandalizing of personal property belonging to people who had not actually committed a crime by waiting in a parking lot

Trebek posted:

Samizdata posted:

Or some Perverted Justice: The Series.

Danaru posted:

We had a group of vigilante shitheads doing something similar around here a while back. Their notable achievements were catching zero predators, beating the poo poo out of a mentally disabled man who wasn't even the guy they catfished, and causing the police to publicly tell people poo poo like this fucks up their investigations and can make actual predators walk free. I think they ended up stopping after most of them went to jail for attacking random citizens.

life is killing me posted:

If only there was some kind of group of uniformed people with the resources to gather proof of sex crimes and try sexual predators in a court of law and send them to jail, or maybe a national register of sorts so that people would know who they are and where they live. IMHO this would be the best way to catch these people. Oh well, guess I'll go catfish some dudes with complete lack of proof they are the person I catfished or that they have even committed a crime so I can vandalize their cars, that'll show them! Everyone knows that vandalizing peoples' poo poo gets them to stop whatever they are allegedly doing, rather than going to the police themselves to report that their car was keyed and spray-painted by some teenagers who think they are contributing to humanity in any way

oldpainless posted:

gently caress the police

Trebek posted:

Trash Boat posted:

You can't delete my decade old memory card! That's more important to me than my dead family members!

Anyway, get a load of this gross manbaby crying over his banned game account.