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Splatmaster posted:A karaoke bar for mimes CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: |
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Jul 29, 2017 15:43
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Glorious Nipawn
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Jul 29, 2017 18:27
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ShinyBirdTeeth posted:Glorious Nipawn thought this was gonna be a gag about pawning japan tbh :/ |
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Jul 29, 2017 19:01
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weed cookies baked daily
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Jul 29, 2017 19:40
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:thought this was gonna be a gag about pawning japan tbh :/ "Don't be mad, Baby, I just got a little note on a couple of allies; I'm gonna pay it off! We're not even using them right now --- come on don't walk out on me while I'm talking! Britannia, get back here, Baby, I need you!" |
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Jul 29, 2017 19:53
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boxers or griefs |
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Jul 29, 2017 21:39
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sic semper tyrannosaurus |
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Jul 29, 2017 22:07
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bacalou posted:sic semper tyrannosaurus name of a sitcom about a t rex bowling team, their tiny arms are unsuited to the sport |
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Jul 29, 2017 22:24
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baba yoga you are journeying deep inside a dark wild forest. you come across a hut on chicken legs. the chicken legs are standing on a neoprene mat in a classic "tree" position you yell to the hut, "shoulders relaxed!"
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Jul 30, 2017 03:22
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bbq romance novels "He was shrouded in an aura of mesquite, the scent of liquid smoke on the breeze." idfk |
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Jul 30, 2017 17:59
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| She buttered his cob | |
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Jul 30, 2017 18:04
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Jedrick posted:bbq romance novels Do the thread! Do the thread! 
https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
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Jul 30, 2017 18:14
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He was dripping with sweet and sticky sauce after she basted him in the sun
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Jul 30, 2017 18:43
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He leaned in close, running his fingers through her hair. Kissing her neck softly, he breathed in, and a familiar scent filled his nostrils. The same scent of that woman at the masquerade... "Is that..." he asked, "...Eau de Aioli?" |
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Jul 30, 2017 18:58
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blindfolded, i wait in burning anticipation for my lover to drizzle the first drops of hot rendered fat onto my exposed porcelain flesh, an exquisite agony |
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Jul 30, 2017 19:01
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"I didn't know you can handle all those sausages" "You should see how I'm gonna marinate your beef" |
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Jul 30, 2017 19:06
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Ride The Gravitron posted:"I didn't know you can handle all those sausages" 
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Jul 30, 2017 19:17
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do you like the band imagine dragons? can you imagine dragon these nuts across your forehead? |
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Jul 31, 2017 05:20
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lumpanoodle posted:do you like the band imagine dragons? This is a gold mine waiting to happen |
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Jul 31, 2017 14:22
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Me, hesitating to run into an obstacle course. Drill Sergeant: I need you full of piss and vinegar, you dirt eating maggot. Me: I'm mostly taco and balsamic does that -- DS: GET UP THAT ROPE YOU IDIOT |
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Jul 31, 2017 15:49
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Drill Sergeant: WHAT ITS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION! Me: oh man I'm glad you asked, I really need some one to talk to |
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Jul 31, 2017 16:57
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Ride The Gravitron posted:Drill Sergeant: WHAT ITS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION! *has incredibly kind and affirming discussion that leaves everyone satisfied  *
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Jul 31, 2017 19:19
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I'm having trouble navigating life now that I finally purchased a very tall hat. From an early age I knew that something was missing from my life, something real, something vital: a very tall hat. When you're a kid, you don't really know what to do with yourself and god help teens, but I'm a man now and I took my life into my own hands. I purchased a remarkably large garment that I refuse to remove at any time or for any reason.. I regret absolutely nothing about what I have done. But I had not considered the limitations of standard doorways -- the less said about airplane cabins the better -- and I never worked out the geometry of a driving a 1996 Geo Hatchback while wearing generously apportioned head-wear. The bird nesting has become a problem. I said it wouldn't, but it has and I'm man enough to admit that now. My girlfriend is coming around. She's coming around to coming around. Our relationship is strong and she likes the coloring of the middle band of the North face of my towering lid. There is a lot of space to work with, so there's a little bit of something for everyone. She'll find her own joy in this journey we're taking as a family. This journey into impractically-sized, aluminum-girded hats. |
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Aug 1, 2017 02:13
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Flicks open a zippo. Lights up a slim jim. "Welcome to flavor country." |
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Aug 2, 2017 02:40
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I once read the instructions on a box of pasta, threw it away, then fished it out to consult it again. The box saidNoodleman's Delight posted:Just boil water, you lovely idiot. I set the box on the counter. Just in case. |
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Aug 2, 2017 04:25
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A dog having a midlife crisis, chewing on a brand new expensive toy: "Who really is a good boy? Am I a good boy?"
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Aug 2, 2017 20:31
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If you want to put your faith in that dull knife, then be my guest, but I don't feel safe at brunch without my butter machete. |
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Aug 2, 2017 20:50
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Twenty Four posted:A dog having a midlife crisis, chewing on a brand new expensive toy: I've been a good boy my whole life. I think it's time to be a bad boy. 
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Aug 2, 2017 21:02
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*bad to the (toy) bone starts playing*
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Aug 2, 2017 21:02
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Twenty Four posted:A dog having a midlife crisis, chewing on a brand new expensive toy: camera pulls out, he's chewing on a child's femur |
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Aug 2, 2017 21:35
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It's ok though, that child was Hitler.
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Aug 2, 2017 22:56
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bad times/places to explain to your parents that youre a member of a rap group called "the bitch pleasers" and your last album just sold 3 million copies
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Aug 4, 2017 00:09
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little munchkin posted:bad times/places to explain to your parents that youre a member of a rap group called "the bitch pleasers" and your last album just sold 3 million copies granny's funeral ---------------- |
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Aug 4, 2017 02:44
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little munchkin posted:bad times/places to explain to your parents that youre a member of a rap group called "the bitch pleasers" and your last album just sold 3 million copies At Mom's feminist reading group |
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Aug 4, 2017 03:23
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[37 seven seconds of adjusting mic stand noises] this...ahh...is a really special song. I think it really captures...uhhh...what we're all about. [beige-colored rock music] singin bout music singin bout music nothing could matter more than singin bout music stories are boring rapping takes talent key changes are hard but i keep scoring singin bout music singin bout music I don't even know all the words singin bout music singin bout music |
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Aug 4, 2017 03:52
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Ride The Gravitron posted:At Mom's feminist reading group that would be a bad place for sure ---------------- |
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Aug 4, 2017 04:03
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trying to explain to a bunch of moms friends wearing loose fitting tanktops and no bras that changing the name now would be too damaging to our brand
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Aug 4, 2017 04:05
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Natural Mail Enhancement:
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Aug 4, 2017 18:04
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alnilam posted:Natural Mail Enhancement: Smaller, more manageable letters are ultimately more satisfying than impressive, but unwieldy packages. |
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Aug 4, 2017 18:20
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| # ? Apr 27, 2024 15:40 |
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its not the size of the package, its how you deliver it
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Aug 4, 2017 18:58
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