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InitialDave
Jun 14, 2007

I Want To Believe.
They've actually made that illegal here. No smoking in a vehicle if someone under 18 is there.

Of course, driving age is 17 here, leading to some rather convoluted clauses in that one.

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xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

Saw a rare act of awareness today, dude in a truck is doing the traffic weaving thing to try and shave seconds of his commute. We're approaching a stop light I turn right at and has no turn lanes. He zips in front of me just as I turn on my blinker. Just as my blood pressure begins to rise he swings back into his original lane to let me pass, then gets behind me.

I wasn't sure how to react. On one hand he's driving like a twerp. On the other, he's actually paying attention to what's going on around him.

I ended up giving a thumbs up because being nice is better than being mad I suppose.

Macichne Leainig
Jul 26, 2012

by VG
I love people who drive in the shoulder to get around one car in bumper-to-bumper traffic. Congrats, now you're one car ahead, and still stuck going 5MPH like the rest of us. Oh, and now everyone knows you're a dick.

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:

Protocol7 posted:

I love people who drive in the shoulder to get around one car in bumper-to-bumper traffic. Congrats, now you're one car ahead, and still stuck going 5MPH like the rest of us. Oh, and now everyone knows you're a dick.

My favorite is with a 2 lane interstate.

Left lane is tied up by a semi or something slow for at least a mile with a string a vehicles behind it but the left lane is cruising just slightly faster than the right.

Guy behind you moves over to right pass you and everyone else but gets held up by slower right lane. Then a parade of cars with no gaps slowly passes him as he loses ten spots.

iospace
Jan 19, 2038


Colostomy Bag posted:

My favorite is with a 2 lane interstate.

Left lane is tied up by a semi or something slow for at least a mile with a string a vehicles behind it but the left lane is cruising just slightly faster than the right.

Guy behind you moves over to right pass you and everyone else but gets held up by slower right lane. Then a parade of cars with no gaps slowly passes him as he loses ten spots.

I hate those semis that do that, but laugh at the people who think they can get by on the right.

Dick Trauma
Nov 30, 2007

God damn it, you've got to be kind.

These videos have made my balls crawl up inside my body in fear. I think they are nestled next to my kidneys right now.

ThePeavstenator
Dec 18, 2012

:burger::burger::burger::burger::burger:

Establish the Buns

:burger::burger::burger::burger::burger:

Colostomy Bag posted:

My favorite is with a 2 lane interstate.

Left lane is tied up by a semi or something slow for at least a mile with a string a vehicles behind it but the left lane is cruising just slightly faster than the right.

Guy behind you moves over to right pass you and everyone else but gets held up by slower right lane. Then a parade of cars with no gaps slowly passes him as he loses ten spots.

One of my friends who "hates driving" but thinks she's better than everyone else on the road drives like this. Short term gains with no foresight that gain her nothing except raised blood pressure. I guess that's what happens when the furthest people are trained to look is down the front of their hood at the bumper of the car in front of them.

Aggressive driving saves you like no time, makes you look like a dickhead, lowers your fuel economy, and just makes you angrier. Just chill out and go fast when you can and don't try to occupy every bit of open space in front of you that you can squeeze yourself into.

Zamboni Apocalypse
Dec 29, 2009

Protocol7 posted:

I love people who drive in the shoulder to get around one car in bumper-to-bumper traffic. Congrats, now you're one car ahead, and still stuck going 5MPH like the rest of us. Oh, and now everyone knows you're a dick.

This is where the GIF of the shoulder-passer getting high-centered on the barrier needs to appear.

Disgruntled Bovine
Jul 5, 2010

Colostomy Bag posted:

My favorite is with a 2 lane interstate.

Left lane is tied up by a semi or something slow for at least a mile with a string a vehicles behind it but the left lane is cruising just slightly faster than the right.

Guy behind you moves over to right pass you and everyone else but gets held up by slower right lane. Then a parade of cars with no gaps slowly passes him as he loses ten spots.

I pass on the right when the left lane's clogged frequently, the difference is I scope out both lanes to be sure I'll be able to make enough progress that it's worth it, and that I've got a decent chance of being able to get back over. Basically if you want to maintain a speed of 75-80 mph in the left lane you have to constantly pass folks on the right, because the number of left lane hogs doing 70 around here is ridiculous.

Macichne Leainig
Jul 26, 2012

by VG
It's not uncommon to pass on the right on I-25 through Denver because there are so many idiots cruising at less than or equal to the speed limit in the left lanes while everyone else is going 5-10 over.

But that's only when you're actually going faster than the speed limit which is usually not the case. Said shoulder passing I mentioned earlier happened on I-25 bumper to bumper traffic.

Stick Insect
Oct 24, 2010

My enemies are many.

My equals are none.
Riding through town centre today on my bicycle. This long truck & trailer combo coming from the right needs to make a 90 degree turn (and they have the right of way). The roads are narrow and there's not a lot of space to manoeuvrer. I stop well back from the intersection so I don't have to get crushed under the trailer while I wait.

This BMW overtakes me as I'm standing there, and rolls as far forward as they can go. The car behind the BMW immediately follows their example, overtakes me as well and stops right behind the BMW.

The truck slams brakes, then starts inching forwards again. The trailer is getting awfully close to touching the BMW so they toot their horn a few times. Some gesticulation and anger ensues. BMW tries to reverse, but can't because of the car behind them. Then the 2nd car starts blowing their horn. At this point traffic is completely blocked in all directions, so I just walk around the blockage.

How do you not see such a big truck? What on earth is their thought process?

MrLogan
Feb 4, 2004

Ask me about Derek Carr's stolen MVP awards, those dastardly refs, and, oh yeah, having the absolute worst fucking gimmick in The Football Funhouse.

Colostomy Bag posted:

My favorite is with a 2 lane interstate.

Left lane is tied up by a semi or something slow for at least a mile with a string a vehicles behind it but the left lane is cruising just slightly faster than the right.

Guy behind you moves over to right pass you and everyone else but gets held up by slower right lane. Then a parade of cars with no gaps slowly passes him as he loses ten spots.

This is me. Except I got over the right by habit after finishing passing and have to wait on all the people who never move out of the left lane.

BOOTY-ADE
Aug 30, 2006

BIG KOOL TELLIN' Y'ALL TO KEEP IT TIGHT

Stick Insect posted:

How do you not see such a big truck? What on earth is their thought process?

Answer: "I think my time is more important than everyone else's for <reason>"

ThePeavstenator
Dec 18, 2012

:burger::burger::burger::burger::burger:

Establish the Buns

:burger::burger::burger::burger::burger:
If you drive really fast, always go first, and get as close as you can to other vehicles obstacles in your way you'll get places faster. That's just math.

xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

The only real advantage to burying your foot is stop lights. Acceleration out of a dead stop is by far the worst thing you can do in terms of fuel efficiency, and if you accelerate modestly and stick to the speed limit almost every stop light is rigged to flip red as soon as you approach it.

Meanwhile speedy mcasshole who charged ahead gets to breeze off into the distance under the glow of endless green lights.

Sure, you spend more gas to get up to speed that fast, but it's a net savings because you're stopping less.

Macichne Leainig
Jul 26, 2012

by VG

xzzy posted:

The only real advantage to burying your foot is stop lights. Acceleration out of a dead stop is by far the worst thing you can do in terms of fuel efficiency, and if you accelerate modestly and stick to the speed limit almost every stop light is rigged to flip red as soon as you approach it.

Meanwhile speedy mcasshole who charged ahead gets to breeze off into the distance under the glow of endless green lights.

Sure, you spend more gas to get up to speed that fast, but it's a net savings because you're stopping less.

Or, if you're like me and were a lovely teenager, you figured out you could nail all of the green lights on the major road near where your parents live by going at least 60.

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:

Disgruntled Bovine posted:

I pass on the right when the left lane's clogged frequently, the difference is I scope out both lanes to be sure I'll be able to make enough progress that it's worth it, and that I've got a decent chance of being able to get back over. Basically if you want to maintain a speed of 75-80 mph in the left lane you have to constantly pass folks on the right, because the number of left lane hogs doing 70 around here is ridiculous.

Yep, no problem with that. Fairly easy to scan ahead to see if you can pull it off...but alas not many have situational awareness.

monsterzero
May 12, 2002
-=TOPGUN=-
Boys who love airplanes :respek: Boys who love boys
Lipstick Apathy

Colostomy Bag posted:

My favorite is with a 2 lane interstate.

Left lane is tied up by a semi or something slow for at least a mile with a string a vehicles behind it but the left lane is cruising just slightly faster than the right.

Guy behind you moves over to right pass you and everyone else but gets held up by slower right lane. Then a parade of cars with no gaps slowly passes him as he loses ten spots.

In my experience this never happens. It's always a case that people towards the back of that left lane train merge right, then fly right up to the bumper of the rolling obstruction and then force their way back into the left lane, causing the person they cut-off to brake. Then someone further back in the train goes "why are these people so slow, I'll pass on the right!" and a little more of me dies inside.

ulmont
Sep 15, 2010

IF I EVER MISS VOTING IN AN ELECTION (EVEN AMERICAN IDOL) ,OR HAVE UNPAID PARKING TICKETS, PLEASE TAKE AWAY MY FRANCHISE

quote:

Russian female biker who performed raunchy stunts for Instagram wearing just a thong and high heels dies in a horrific crash
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4750914/Female-Instagram-biker-dies-horrific-crash-Russia.html

El Jebus
Jun 18, 2008

This avatar is paid for by "Avatars for improving Lowtax's spine by any means that doesn't result in him becoming brain dead by putting his brain into a cyborg body and/or putting him in a exosuit due to fears of the suit being hacked and crushing him during a cyberpunk future timeline" Foundation

monsterzero posted:

In my experience this never happens. It's always a case that people towards the back of that left lane train merge right, then fly right up to the bumper of the rolling obstruction and then force their way back into the left lane, causing the person they cut-off to brake. Then someone further back in the train goes "why are these people so slow, I'll pass on the right!" and a little more of me dies inside.


I'm getting ready to do I-5 north from LA to Portland. For most of the trip, you are on 2 lanes outside of the cities and 3 lanes inside. Cruise control offers two speeds, 60-69 if you want to stay behind a semi and cruise in the right lane, or 70-75 if you want to cruise behind someone camping in the left lane while you slowly pass the clumps of semis. Of course, if you want to go faster, your best option is waiting for a gap between semi groups, launching into the right lane and accelerating past the group of left lane campers. Flashing your brights in an attempt to get people to move over rarely works during daylight hours. I'm not excited.

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:

monsterzero posted:

In my experience this never happens. It's always a case that people towards the back of that left lane train merge right, then fly right up to the bumper of the rolling obstruction and then force their way back into the left lane, causing the person they cut-off to brake. Then someone further back in the train goes "why are these people so slow, I'll pass on the right!" and a little more of me dies inside.

Yeah, understandable. You have to form a "tight knit caravan" over the course of 10-20 miles to get a feel on how on how everyone else drives and how they feel about everyone else. If everyone is in sync, then good things happen to douchebags and spreading possible fines across said party.

GnarlyCharlie4u
Sep 23, 2007

I have an unhealthy obsession with motorcycles.

Proof

Live fast and leave a sexy corpse?

flightless greeb
Jan 28, 2016

El Jebus posted:

I'm getting ready to do I-5 north from LA to Portland. For most of the trip, you are on 2 lanes outside of the cities and 3 lanes inside. Cruise control offers two speeds, 60-69 if you want to stay behind a semi and cruise in the right lane, or 70-75 if you want to cruise behind someone camping in the left lane while you slowly pass the clumps of semis. Of course, if you want to go faster, your best option is waiting for a gap between semi groups, launching into the right lane and accelerating past the group of left lane campers. Flashing your brights in an attempt to get people to move over rarely works during daylight hours. I'm not excited.

I just drove down from SF to LA on Wed and I'm driving back tomorrow. If you play it like the above in the fast mode you can usually cruise right around 90 until you run into a caravan, then rip past them at like a hundo in the right lane once there's a large clear gap. Keep an eye on the long haulers tho - they usually use their turn signals when they pop into the left lane to pass but not always!

Lime Tonics
Nov 7, 2015

by FactsAreUseless
Idiots play demolition derby after road rage,

https://streamable.com/hjwuy

You Am I
May 20, 2001

Me @ your poasting

Lime Tonics posted:

Idiots play demolition derby after road rage,

https://streamable.com/hjwuy

I'm surprised at the lack of firearms going off. Also was hoping the two SUVs would get smashed harder.

Deteriorata
Feb 6, 2005

You Am I posted:

I'm surprised at the lack of firearms going off. Also was hoping the two SUVs would get smashed harder.

I was disappointed that no one shouted "Towanda!"

Ror
Oct 21, 2010

😸Everything's 🗞️ purrfect!💯🤟


Lime Tonics posted:

Idiots play demolition derby after road rage,

https://streamable.com/hjwuy

The fire hydrant is a nice cinematic finish.

InediblePenguin
Sep 27, 2004

I'm strong. And a giant penguin. Please don't eat me. No, really. Don't try.
today in the parts department we got a call from a guy who needed "the yellow light under the headlight"

"okay -- is it the turn signal?"

"no it's NOT the turn signal, it's the yellow light that comes on when you use your blinker"

further questioning made it clear that it is, in fact, the turn signal, but he remained completely adamant that it was not the turn signal, just the light that comes on when you use your blinker

his part will come to him in a small box labelled "indicator lamp" and he will remain secure in his certainty that the blinker and the turn signal are DEFINITELY NOT AT ALL the same thing

frankly I'm amazed he knows what happens when you use your blinker at all, since most people have never used the drat thing in their lives

edit: callback to the second post in this thread: yesterday my dad went to get new tires and witnessed a guy expecting Mavis Discount Tire to be capable of replacing a cat

InediblePenguin fucked around with this message at 02:29 on Aug 5, 2017

monsterzero
May 12, 2002
-=TOPGUN=-
Boys who love airplanes :respek: Boys who love boys
Lipstick Apathy

El Jebus posted:

I'm getting ready to do I-5 north from LA to Portland. For most of the trip, you are on 2 lanes outside of the cities and 3 lanes inside. Cruise control offers two speeds, 60-69 if you want to stay behind a semi and cruise in the right lane, or 70-75 if you want to cruise behind someone camping in the left lane while you slowly pass the clumps of semis. Of course, if you want to go faster, your best option is waiting for a gap between semi groups, launching into the right lane and accelerating past the group of left lane campers. Flashing your brights in an attempt to get people to move over rarely works during daylight hours. I'm not excited.

I5 from the Grapevine to 580 is literally what I was writing about. At least it gets reasonable once you're past Sacramento, until you start sharing the rose with Oregonians.

Colostomy Bag posted:

Yeah, understandable. You have to form a "tight knit caravan" over the course of 10-20 miles to get a feel on how on how everyone else drives and how they feel about everyone else. If everyone is in sync, then good things happen to douchebags and spreading possible fines across said party.

No, there is no hope. Only pain.

xzzy
Mar 5, 2009

He probably got a citation and got the terminology from the officer.

Not Wolverine
Jul 1, 2007
Clearly the part you ordered is a 4-way park anywhere because I'm special light.

sleepy.eyes
Sep 14, 2007

Like a pig in a chute.
The pizza place across from my place gets that all the time. Want to park in the fire lane? If you don't turn off your car it isn't parking and is legit, right?

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:

monsterzero posted:

I5 from the Grapevine to 580 is literally what I was writing about. At least it gets reasonable once you're past Sacramento, until you start sharing the rose with Oregonians.


No, there is no hope. Only pain.

The wild west.

DEEP STATE PLOT
Aug 13, 2008

Yes...Ha ha ha...YES!



El Jebus posted:

I'm getting ready to do I-5 north from LA to Portland. For most of the trip, you are on 2 lanes outside of the cities and 3 lanes inside. Cruise control offers two speeds, 60-69 if you want to stay behind a semi and cruise in the right lane, or 70-75 if you want to cruise behind someone camping in the left lane while you slowly pass the clumps of semis. Of course, if you want to go faster, your best option is waiting for a gap between semi groups, launching into the right lane and accelerating past the group of left lane campers. Flashing your brights in an attempt to get people to move over rarely works during daylight hours. I'm not excited.

i drive on i-5 from grants pass to ashland and back 5 days a week when college is in session and holy fuckin sweet jesus i can't believe the drivers at least on that stretch of i-5 are so much worse than they are back in my old stomping grounds of upstate new york

the amount of left lane campers alone drives me loving batty. also i'm apparently the only person who drives this highway with cruise control on or who knows how to hold a constant speed, because everyone else, no matter how new or old or luxurious their vehicle is, varies their speed by like 10mph so i will pass them at 75, then they'll pass me while i'm still going 75, then i'll pass them back, repeat. it's so annoying, like why don't you just go one speed it isn't really hard.

also i got pulled over for going 72 in a 65 on i-5 which is just :laffo:

Javid
Oct 21, 2004

:jpmf:
It's almost like 72 is a higher number than 65, the highest number you're legally supposed to make your car go at. Have you considered making your car go 65?

SapientCorvid
Jun 16, 2008

reading The Internet

Javid posted:

It's almost like 72 is a higher number than 65, the highest number you're legally supposed to make your car go at. Have you considered making your car go 65?

:boom:

DEEP STATE PLOT
Aug 13, 2008

Yes...Ha ha ha...YES!



Javid posted:

It's almost like 72 is a higher number than 65, the highest number you're legally supposed to make your car go at. Have you considered making your car go 65?

:nallears:

DEEP STATE PLOT fucked around with this message at 07:54 on Aug 5, 2017

ilmucche
Mar 16, 2016

Lime Tonics posted:

Idiots play demolition derby after road rage,

https://streamable.com/hjwuy

They're literally holding a phone to film this. call the goddamn police

Powershift
Nov 23, 2009


ilmucche posted:

They're literally holding a phone to film this. call the goddamn police

yeah, right. You call the cops, they show up, next thing you know you've got 6 warning shots in your back.

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AMISH FRIED PIES
Mar 6, 2009

by Nyc_Tattoo

Zamboni Apocalypse posted:

This is where the GIF of the shoulder-passer getting high-centered on the barrier needs to appear.

Can't find a GIF on short notice, but I fould the video! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x1Wc4EQvkL4

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