You're a fantastic poster

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Emmideer: Oct 20, 2011; Lovely night, no?; Grimey Drawer

and I'd like to hear your greatest hits. Go on, quote yourself!

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:33

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 20, 2024 06:00

Putty: Mar 21, 2013; HOOKED ON THE BROTHERS

ok

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVogusB5xO4

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:36

nextlevelstart: Feb 26, 2015

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:41

Comfy Fleece Sweater: Apr 2, 2013; You see, but you do not observe.

Ban Kuato!

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:42

Repo Man: Nov 19, 2005

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:45

Kuato: Feb 25, 2005; "I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"; Buglord

Comfy Fleece Sweater posted:

Make Kuato mod!

Well I appreciate the gesture of support but I don't think I have the time to moderate this place. Your kind words do mean a lot to me however, friend.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:47

Katamari Democracy: Jan 19, 2010; Guess what!
Guess what this is?
A Post, Just for you!; Wedge Regret

THANKS OP!

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:51

Julius CSAR: Oct 3, 2007; by sebmojo

One time I wrote a post that was funny.

Only one time though.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:51

Sherry Bahm: Jul 30, 2003; filled with dolphins

My mom thinks I'm pretty cool. She likes all my posts.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:52

CaptainSarcastic: Jul 6, 2013

My best posts were mostly "your mom" jokes or telling people to kill themselves, so quoting them would probably get me probated.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:55

Chinatown: Sep 11, 2001; by Fluffdaddy; Fun Shoe

huh?

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:57

myDad: Jan 20, 2010; ce n'est pas ma m�re; College Slice

thx

# ? Sep 13, 2017 05:58

Cephalectomy: Jun 8, 2007

gas t hread, ban op

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:02

Cephalectomy: Jun 8, 2007

Cephalectomy posted:

gas t hread, ban op

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:02

COMRADES: Apr 3, 2017; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Moridin920 posted:

im gay

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# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:13

SLICK GOKU BABY: Jun 12, 2001; Hey Hey Let's Go! 喧嘩する
大切な物を protect my balls

I am actually a bad poster OP, you must be delusional.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:16

Kuato: Feb 25, 2005; "I CAN'T BELIEVE I ATE THE WHOLE THING"; Buglord

SLICK GOKU BABY posted:

I am actually a bad poster OP, you must be delusional.

More lies from Slick Goku Baby

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:20

Blurry Gray Thing: Jun 3, 2009

I can't, OP. I'm scared. I know people liked it back when I posted it, but modern GBS will hate it and call it bad.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:20

mind the walrus: Sep 22, 2006

I don't have access to the tens of thousands of words I wrote on superhero movies so pretend this post takes up half the page with the most tedious bullshit you've ever read in your life.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:27

a hole-y ghost: May 10, 2010

mind the walrus posted:

I don't have access to the tens of thousands of words I wrote on superhero movies so pretend this post takes up half the page with the most tedious bullshit you've ever read in your life.

Never have to pretend with you

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:28

Blurry Gray Thing: Jun 3, 2009

Blurry Gray Thing posted:

I can't, OP. I'm scared. I know people liked it back when I posted it, but modern GBS will hate it and call it bad.

I lied, fuckers. That was my impression of all of you. I know it's all terrible and a sign of serious head problems but I am NOT SCARED!

Blurry Gray Thing posted:

It's two PM. The small hours. The bad hours. The hours that try men's souls. If you're like me, that's when all your old mistakes, all your doubts gang up on you. Knock you down, work you over, kick you right in your old wounds until they bleed again, fresh as ever, and the answers to the important questions stop making sense. Why go on? Why bother?

Sure, I've got it all figured out, the rest of the time. I got my reasons to do what I do. Good reasons. Student loan payments. The cute girl down at the bakery. Employee discount at the deli section, and some of those salads really are damned good. But at 2 PM, deep into my shift but nowhere near its end, none of them ring true. None of those are the real one.

I see trouble coming for me from a mile away, but like a deer facing down a pair of high beams, I'm too drat stupid to run. Thirty-five going on fifty. Mother of two point five kids. Sensible, low-maintenance haircut. Danger, capitalized and burning. And in the back of my head, there's that little voice. The voice I try to drown in cheap gin every night. The voice that's gonna get me killed one day, or maybe even worse. It's saying 'this woman needs help', and drat me if I don't listen to it.

That's the real reason. I'm too drat stupid to quit.

"Hello, ma'am, how can I help you?" I say. My words taste like cigarette ash and cheap gin in my mouth. Most words do.

"Uh, yes," she says. Then she smiles, awkward. She catches on that I said how can I, and not just can I. I smile back to let her know it's okay, and it is. You don't work this beat as long as I have without running into that a thousand times over, into that and worse. "Do you still carry rye bread? It's just, I checked over there, and I didn't see any."

"Yes ma'am," I say. "It's over on isle two now."

"Oh!" she says. "Yes, I thought things looked a little different. Thank you for your help."

I watch her go, watch her walk out of my life as fast as she came in. Then I turn down the next isle and walk away, my pricing gun heavy on my hip. The cereal boxes watch me in silence, black, empty cartoon eyes tracking my every move. I close my eyes, and feel the store embrace me.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:33

Cephalectomy: Jun 8, 2007

My posts tell a story of laughing at tragedies and tempting the fates by making shitposts in gbs politics threads.Every bad post i make fills me with adrenaline as I wait, genitals clutched firmly in hand. Will someone diss me? Will I get emptyquoted?

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:33

Cease to Hope: Dec 12, 2011

my posts aren't really worth sharing

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:35

FreakerByTheSpeaker: Dec 3, 2006; You got your good things
And I've got mine

I'm actually a pretty garbage shitposter, but thanks for building me up, OP!

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:37

mind the walrus: Sep 22, 2006

a hole-y ghost posted:

Never have to pretend with you

Like a bronze medal for consistency I'll throw this sentiment in my junk drawer and accidentally throw it out in 5 years.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 06:57

Mariana Horchata: Jun 30, 2008; College Slice

thanks i guess

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FHsip5xOenQ

dont get too comfortable...

# ? Sep 13, 2017 08:35

Duckbox: Sep 7, 2007

I made lots of great posts but they were all in para/con and are too spooky for GBS.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 08:39

Nigmaetcetera: Nov 17, 2004; borkborkborkmorkmorkmork-gabbalooins

"I ain't never killed nobody, but it remains to be seen how long that remains true"

-my pappy

Nigmaetcetera fucked around with this message at 09:07 on Sep 13, 2017

# ? Sep 13, 2017 09:03

Rock Paper Tongue: Oct 24, 2016; May cause birth defects

You don't have to lie to me OP, but I appreciate the thought

# ? Sep 13, 2017 09:05

Nice Guy Patron: Jun 29, 2015

Geeze, thanks OP. You've made my day.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 09:08

gimme the GOD DAMN candy: Jul 1, 2007

if i ever made a good post it was by accident

# ? Sep 13, 2017 09:09

Altared State: Jan 14, 2006; I think I was born to burn

Nope

Only registered members can see post attachments!

# ? Sep 13, 2017 09:16

Cephalectomy: Jun 8, 2007

We Know Catheters posted:

Nope

# ? Sep 13, 2017 09:20

Nice Guy Patron: Jun 29, 2015

We Know Catheters posted:

Nope

Looks like Stress would be a good drinking buddy.

# ? Sep 13, 2017 09:23

Streak: May 16, 2004; by Nyc_Tattoo

i'm sorry you seem to have me confused for someone else

# ? Sep 13, 2017 09:39

cnut: May 3, 2016

I wouldn't say I'm a good poster but I do love a good poster. Like this one, for instance:

# ? Sep 13, 2017 10:14

The Dennis System: Aug 4, 2014; Nothing in Jurassic World is natural, we have always filled gaps in the genome with the DNA of other animals. And if the genetic code was pure, many of them would look quite different. But you didn't ask for reality, you asked for more teeth.