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Latin Pheonix posted:Yes, and it's every bit as glorious as Chris said it would be. In fact, all of SA has been renamed 'the Chris Roberts Appreciation Station' and Lowtax has personally bought a completionist package to atone for previous wrongdoings.
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Nov 6, 2017 02:56
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Richie Stardust posted:That's why I think I can do some good over there, and I'm going to abandon my successful career in electrical power and answer the call. I know that some of the regular posters here know how to GOOGLE and put out some BUZZWORDS, but it's obvious that those guys are only PRETENDING to be experts. It's obvious who the SPARKYS are. They're all too young to realize that their tricks don't WORK on ME!! Super important interview question, but was your height map dick from the side (one ball), or from the top/bottom (two balls), and did you include something streaming out the tip? This is the kind of stuff that will separate the professionals from the kids just playing around here.
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Nov 6, 2017 03:08
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TheAgent posted:The programming and writing are easy, the artwork is absolutely loving killing me costs wise. I’ll do stuff for free. But uh, my content is usually porn and the quality is very iffy.
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Nov 6, 2017 03:09
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Omg this is the best. Corgi puppy (?) in an Adidas jacket!!! 
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Nov 6, 2017 03:11
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peter gabriel posted:Hello space pals, I am in my new house, using phone as a hotspot til my fibre gets installed. Don’t get angry at me... but.... no... *hides behind a book as a shield. The book is the Sq42 script so I’m feeling pretty safe*
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Nov 6, 2017 03:12
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Yes. I love you, Throatse. <3
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Nov 6, 2017 03:15
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TheAgent posted:The programming and writing are easy, the artwork is absolutely loving killing me costs wise. That's why you invest, up front, on assets. You let the easy programming poo poo come later. You could learn a thing or two from Star Citizen and Chris Roberts.
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Nov 6, 2017 03:43
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bunz  
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Nov 6, 2017 03:45
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Mirificus posted:r/elitedangerousrefunds  
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Nov 6, 2017 04:20
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The Titanic posted:I’ll do stuff for free. But uh, my content is usually porn and the quality is very iffy.  tits $100 or best offer.
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Nov 6, 2017 04:27
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Propagandist posted:bunz Throw them in the pot
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Nov 6, 2017 05:19
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I'm kidding
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Nov 6, 2017 05:20
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Off-topic but I want to say to the Stellaris developer that I bought your game and had to force myself to quit after 7 hours or else I will be a zombie at work tomorrow. It is very very good. My only regret is that the Covfefe star system is way too far out for me to explore. 
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Nov 6, 2017 05:31
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*DEEP BREATH IN* Elite Dangerous is a loving EMBARRASSMENT. What a TERRIBLE loving game. I knew on paper that "The Engineers" dlc would make everything worse, so I refused to play it. Well, for no particular reason I finally did this weekend, and holy gently caress MOLEY did they fudge the bucket. Not even a swing and a miss, not a strikeout, more like the "special" kid standing facing the wrong way at home plate swinging towards the backstop hitting the umpire's face mask off and getting ejected because he's a danger to himself and others. "Playing" Elite loving Dangerous is like swimming around trying to find your girlfriend's toe ring in an olympic sized swimming pool filled to the lip with hot liquid beer poo poo that's been set on fire. I thought hey! Let's upgrade my Vulture! It's kitted as a fighter, so I started with weapons. Well, how do I start? What do I do? Where should I go? No idea. Game doesn't tell me anything, so I go to the internet and follow some fuckwad's reddit guide. This is the only way to learn any god drat thing about how to play Elite Dangerous, because the people who make it have loving aspberger's, and have no concept of other people, what information is, what knowledge is, and least of all how to transmit it to others. So, bad start. After I read the dishearteningly shallow and tedious list of things I had to do, I spent the next 10 hours loving FUTZING around looking for randomly spawned "USS's" (which I had to google in a DIFFERENT loving tab only to discover that means "Unidentified Signal Sources") collecting randomly spawned "materials" and "data" the engineer "requires" for the upgrade, or, when that loving failed horribly because most of the "materials" that randomly spawn in the randomly spawned "USS's" are loving USELESS, I searched the internet for ways to scum the game systems to collect said "data" because it was taking too god drat long and flying around waiting for random loving DICE ROLLS of DICE ROLLS ain't my idea of "playing" a "game". Never mind Frontier has still provided NO ACTUAL gently caress REASON to upgrade your ship at all, because once you do, you will left with the same empty mindless NOTHING that is Elite's trademark... So I finally luck and scum into the bullshit crap I need to get the ultimately useless upgrade I want. I travel back to the engineer, which takes about 15 mins of mindless jumping from star to star and "scooping" of fuel so I don't wind up stranded, although the entire gameplay experience feels like being stranded, so I could have just saved myself some time there. I get to the engineer's system, fart around for another 5 minutes in "super cruise" or "frame shift drive" or whatever those loving turbo spergs decided to call it, another 5 minutes entering the atmosphere and landing. I land. loving BRAVO!! WHAT AN ACCOMPLISHMENT!! Kay now here's where it REALLY gets good. I traipse through menus and finally locate the upgrade I want, and wha da ya FUCKIN' know, I can't buy it. Oh, look at that, I failed to see the little "locked, lol gently caress you" icon next to that upgrade among all the clutter and bric-a-brac Frontier calls a UI. I can't get the level 4 one. I can only get the level 1 one. Why? What the gently caress? WHY?? I exclaim. The dog's ears are firmly glued to his head, butt down and he's shaking, and the cat's tail is puffed out. Because even though I wasted my loving life grinding bullshit random drops from bullshit random "areas," I still need to grind "reputation" with this loving dickshit engineer. So I say gently caress that, NO MORE OF THIS BULLSHIT, and just purchase the level 1 upgrade. Well, it makes my weapons objectively loving worse. They're now loving USELESS, the lasers swing wildly, to and fro like loving Ray Charles except ain't NOBODY got a giant grin on their face, except maybe the guy I'm trying to shoot. My aim is all hosed up, can't hit poo poo. Did I notice that right away? No. Hahaha no, of course not, why, I only learned that after ANOTHER 30 mins of mindless nothing travel and boring AI dogfighting, then almost getting blown to loving smithereens cause my weapons were hosed, and more boring mindless return travel. In order to "level up" with the engineer, I have to keep buying this engineer's useless loving upgrades I DON'T WANT that make my weapons WORSE, which I can only GET from tooling around the galaxy like a fuckin' IDIOT looking for randomly spawned bullshit within randomly spawned bullshit. I've never seen better tech wasted on such terrible loving ideas of what a game is. It's like watching a loving elephant paint. Like, good job? You kind of mixed paints and made colors? Still, art doesn't grade on a curve, your painting is horrible, elephant. Elite is a massive turd. A circus of nothing. Cirque de Rien. And if you like Elite, you're a loving moron. Seriously, if you like Elite, go into the bathroom. Go look at yourself in the mirror, and look hard. Right in the eyes. Then hit yourself in the face with a loving dinner plate. *DEEP BREATH OUT*
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Nov 6, 2017 05:36
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"fudge the bucket"
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Nov 6, 2017 05:43
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Oh and Destiny 2 is a nothingburger piece of poo poo too, and you can purchase everything in Assassin's Creed with real money. Gaming is hosed.
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Nov 6, 2017 05:43
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I'm shaking and close to tears.
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Nov 6, 2017 05:44
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thank god roberts is here to finally save pc gaming thank god
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Nov 6, 2017 05:45
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sounds like someone needs to play Mario Odyssey, gaming's ambrosia
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Nov 6, 2017 05:49
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Toops posted:I'm shaking and close to tears. Congratulatons, you are an adult now.
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Nov 6, 2017 05:49
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alf_pogs posted:sounds like someone needs to play Mario Odyssey, gaming's ambrosia Can I play that on my personal computer? Because if not, it's not a game 
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Nov 6, 2017 05:51
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Toops posted:Can I play that on my personal computer? Because if not, it's not a game it is a way of life
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Nov 6, 2017 05:54
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alf_pogs posted:sounds like someone needs to play Mario Odyssey, gaming's ambrosia And follow it up with Mario+Rabbids, a mario themed nu-xcom tactics game.
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Nov 6, 2017 05:56
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alf_pogs posted:it is a way of life Do I have to grind rep with vendors so I can upgrade the buckle on Mario's loving suspenders?
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Nov 6, 2017 05:57
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Toops posted:Do I have to grind rep with vendors so I can upgrade the buckle on Mario's loving suspenders? you don't have to, you want to
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Nov 6, 2017 05:59
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so few good memes and gifs out of this year's citizen convention. truly a disappointment. also how the gently caress is CIG still a thing
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Nov 6, 2017 06:01
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alf_pogs posted:so few good memes and gifs out of this year's citizen convention. truly a disappointment. CIG is getting better and showing actual tech advances instead of fancy bullshots so there was a lot less to make fun of. Our time may come to a close in the near future.
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Nov 6, 2017 06:04
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Calm down Toops, it's 2017, nobody knows how to make gameplay anymore.
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Nov 6, 2017 06:08
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Toops posted:*DEEP BREATH IN* source your quotes
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Nov 6, 2017 06:09
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Because it makes me giggle, that the vanity project is a dumpster fire (no not the CIG one, the movie one)  Ouch....
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Nov 6, 2017 06:12
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SquirrelGrip posted:source your quotes -Toops, Elite Dangerous: Horizons DLC "The Engineers" official review
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Nov 6, 2017 06:19
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SomethingJones posted:Calm down Toops, it's 2017, nobody knows how to make gameplay anymore. It will take me WEEKS to get over this. I don't think I even like video games any more.
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Nov 6, 2017 06:21
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Toops posted:fart around for another 5 minutes in "super cruise" or "frame shift drive" or whatever those loving turbo spergs decided to call it Supercruise was the DDF's (Frontier's sperg army) sole contribution to the game and is the dullest part of the game. In fact it's the dullest part of any game ever. In terms of gameplay it's the equivilent of 1984 Elite with the 'J' key jump drive disabled so you'd have to sit and watch the loving thing in real time which is what you do in ED. Sit. And. Watch. It. In. Real. Time. Star Citizen has taken one of those types of spergs and have them design an entire game.
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Nov 6, 2017 06:22
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SomethingJones posted:Supercruise was the DDF's (Frontier's sperg army) sole contribution to the game and is the dullest part of the game. In fact it's the dullest part of any game ever. In terms of gameplay it's the equivilent of 1984 Elite with the 'J' key jump drive disabled so you'd have to sit and watch the loving thing in real time which is what you do in ED. Sit. And. Watch. It. In. Real. Time. Braben and Roberts can both gently caress a duck as far as I'm concerned.
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Nov 6, 2017 06:25
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SomethingJones posted:Star Citizen has taken one of those types of spergs and have them design an entire game.
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Nov 6, 2017 06:26
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Spiderdrake posted:entire game? Yes Chris Roberts thinks a Blade Runner parody trailer is an entire video game.
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Nov 6, 2017 06:28
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Toops posted:Oh and Destiny 2 is a nothingburger piece of poo poo too, and you can purchase everything in Assassin's Creed with real money. pc gaming was a mistake if mount and blade 2 is bad i'm going back to typewriters
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Nov 6, 2017 07:35
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although we might get star citizen before mount and blade 2
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Nov 6, 2017 07:36
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The Titanic posted:Don’t get angry at me... but.... no... *hides behind a book as a shield. The book is the Sq42 script so I’m feeling pretty safe* He could still get to you through one of the 42000 plot holes.
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Nov 6, 2017 07:41
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The Titanic posted:Chris went into this thing thinking that’d he’d make an arena shooter, and then redesign basic internet communication so he could just basically set player count to infinite and his supreme knowledge of how computers worked in 1994 was going to spearhead this progress. I have a vague memory of something like this. Chris complaining that these newfangled programmers that have lost the idea of OPTIMISATION. His magic hands will come in and make the impossible happen in this new era because of ancient knowledge and just plain ol' gusto.
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Nov 6, 2017 07:57
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