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spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

Star Citizen is a "game" from the creator of the Wing Commander series, Chris Roberts.

In 2012 he did a kickstarter wanting to raise 500,000 dollars (with the intent for investors to provide the rest) to make the game.

The kickstarter exploded and raised millions by selling "ship packages" (ships you'll be able to own/fly when the game is released); Chris realized that he didn't need investors and created his own website to continue to raise money. To date he's gotten over 160 MILLION dollars for this game.

Initially the game's release was going to be in 2014. But since he got so much money (truth is, Chris likes the finer things in life), Chris kept moving the date further, and further, into the future promising that all that cash was going to make the Best drat Space Sim Ever.

Now it's the end of 2017 and there's no game. There is a buggy, unplayable, tech demo they call an alpha.

It's a real shitshow and the wheels are coming off. Recently, and the reason I'm making this thread, Chris Roberts has started to sell parcels of land in this non-existent space game. It's an obvious cash grab. And obviously the studio is in dire need of money.

Since the end is nigh, Rome is burning, and someone is playing a fiddle; please post your funniest star citizen memes, images, photoshops, gifs, or stories as we enjoy the show.

Here's a couple of links to bring you further up to speed on what this is all about :

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3773270 - A historical account of Star Citizen drama over the years (OP is kept updated)

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3772600 - A thread about a fellow goon who just so happens to be the public face of this multi-million dollar, multi-national corporation.

And here is where you can go if you want to buy land in a non existing video game: https://robertsspaceindustries.com/comm-link/transmission/16278-UEE-Land-Claim-Licenses





Somebody said this should be in the OP:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rc7ywfd1qe8

Here are just a couple pages from our operations manual:











OPSEC!! DO NOT SHARE!!!

If you're new to this thing, watch this video, then go to the youtube channel and watch the rest.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGq4YEp8QUY

spacetoaster fucked around with this message at 07:22 on Jan 3, 2018

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spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

Here's some stuff to get us started:



Meme Poker Party
Sep 1, 2006

by Azathoth

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014



Uriah Heep
Apr 28, 2010

im having a bit of an existential crisis here guys
excuse me while i buy some land in the final frontier while you scrubs are out here hating

COMRADES
Apr 3, 2017

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

quote:

Kids... if you REALLY want to piss off your parents
Buy real estate in an imaginary place

Lowtax
Nov 16, 1999

by Skyl3lazer
On the fence about if you should purchase space land in space in a game that will not be completed until man has colonized actual planets in real life? Well this wonderful post on their forums will surely win you over!



By the way, yes, I gave up trying to read that.

house of the dad
Jul 4, 2005

Has anybody compared Star Citizen to bitcoin yet

Lowtax
Nov 16, 1999

by Skyl3lazer

Terrific Accident posted:

Has anybody compared Star Citizen to bitcoin yet
No because Bitcoin exists and works as intended.

COMRADES
Apr 3, 2017

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

quote:

CIG is not "selling land." They've been very clear about this. What they are selling is government protection for your land.

lol

Technically that is all that real life is, too.

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

Lowtax posted:

On the fence about if you should purchase space land in space in a game that will not be completed until man has colonized actual planets in real life? Well this wonderful post on their forums will surely win you over!

By the way, yes, I gave up trying to read that.

We have such sights to show you.

Cultists.







These are just a sampling of the posts on the official forums there.

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

The rabbit hole with citizens (star citizen supporters) goes quite deep.









Hustlin Floh
Jul 20, 2009

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Godspeed Pet Tamer Citizen. He just wants to tame random space birds and Chris Roberts and the fat pedo won't let him

PathAsc
Nov 15, 2011

Hail SS-18 Satan may he cleanse us with nuclear fire

PISS TAPE IS REAL

Let me know when the playable Derek Smart class is in game

VictorianQueerLit
Aug 25, 2017

PathAsc posted:

Let me know when the playable Derek Smart class is in game

They can't even get networking to work on a crysis mod with a dozen players so don't expect the ability to send 4,000 megabyte text files anytime soon. Sorry.

Conch Shell Corp
Feb 24, 2009

more like shart shitizen


















cause its poo poo

Lime Tonics
Nov 7, 2015

by FactsAreUseless
I got a refund. and I just sold off my last buttcoins.

i must be doing something wrong.

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

PathAsc posted:

Let me know when the playable Derek Smart class is in game

There's been a lot of creative goons taking on Derek Smart too.







Sophy Wackles
Dec 17, 2000

> access main security grid
access: PERMISSION DENIED.





When these idiots inevitably get sued or go bankrupt, the only assets that creditors, investors, and players will have to fight over will be thousands of hours of mocap.

Lime Tonics
Nov 7, 2015

by FactsAreUseless

Pawn 17 posted:

When these idiots inevitably get sued or go bankrupt, the only assets that creditors, investors, and players will have to fight over will be thousands of hours of mocap.

you don't get the "vision" man. IF I WANT TO BE AN AIRLINE PILOT IN SPACE MIXING DRINKS ITBDSGE you better be aware of the sway I HOLD.

now excuse me while I live in one of the best asteroid condos you will never afford.

grabby hands.

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

Pawn 17 posted:

When these idiots inevitably get sued or go bankrupt, the only assets that creditors, investors, and players will have to fight over will be thousands of hours of mocap.

I'm pretty sure there are some videos that Chris's lawyer owns the rights to that could be used for colateral (about 5 dollars).

Caesar Saladin
Aug 15, 2004

its so weird that these people seem to accepting the fact that they will never get to play with half of the ships because they won't pay for them in real life. Like, they just shrug their shoulders and never get to experience most of the content in the game, and are tricked into purchasing just one ship and feeling ownership over it. Just like shrugging "Ahh well I'll never get to play with the super mega ship, I'm just not elite enough." A normal game would let you use all of the ships, they have forgotten this.

big nipples big life
May 12, 2014

Lowtax posted:

On the fence about if you should purchase space land in space in a game that will not be completed until man has colonized actual planets in real life? Well this wonderful post on their forums will surely win you over!



By the way, yes, I gave up trying to read that.

I made it to "player-driven, immersive, emergent gameplay" and then blood shot out of my eyes and rear end until I nearly died.

ScRoTo TuRbOtUrD
Jan 21, 2007

Vargs
Mar 27, 2010

are the True Believers still going strong or has their fanbase finally started to turn?

bollig
Apr 7, 2006

Never Forget.
THere are a lot of things that bug me about this whole Star citizen thing. But that they call it the 'verse' really bugs me. It's just bad slang and no one would ever use that phrase organically.

FactsAreUseless
Feb 16, 2011

Vargs posted:

are the True Believers still going strong or has their fanbase finally started to turn?
They won't until it comes out, then people will freak out that it's not the game that existed in their head.

Lime Tonics
Nov 7, 2015

by FactsAreUseless

Vargs posted:

are the True Believers still going strong or has their fanbase finally started to turn?

https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/

COMRADES
Apr 3, 2017

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Caesar Saladin posted:

its so weird that these people seem to accepting the fact that they will never get to play with half of the ships because they won't pay for them in real life. Like, they just shrug their shoulders and never get to experience most of the content in the game, and are tricked into purchasing just one ship and feeling ownership over it. Just like shrugging "Ahh well I'll never get to play with the super mega ship, I'm just not elite enough." A normal game would let you use all of the ships, they have forgotten this.

My understanding is that all those ships will be available in game with in game currency and people are only buying them to "support the game development?"

It's pretty lol either way.

FactsAreUseless posted:

They won't until it comes out, then people will freak out that it's not the game that existed in their head.

Yeah this. It'll be Fable tears x 1000.

big nipples big life
May 12, 2014

FactsAreUseless posted:

They won't until it comes out, then people will freak out that it's not the game that existed in their head.

Derek Smart is gonna post all your spaceships FAU

DJ Fuckboy Supreme
Feb 10, 2011

And when you stare long into the abyss, you become aggressively, terminally chill

tao of lmao
Oct 9, 2005

Great idea for a thread!

Indy
Mar 30, 2005

Hey guys, what's up?

FactsAreUseless posted:

They won't until it comes out, then people will freak out that it's not the game that existed in their head.

This is why it will never be relesed

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

Chris, and his wife (the VP of marketing), have been judiciously spending every penny on the development of this ambitious game.











Notice the half million dollar sports car parked behind Lando in the CIG parking lot. I wonder who that belongs to????? (Chris, duh)

Fried Watermelon
Dec 29, 2008


Magius1337est
Sep 13, 2017

Chimichanga
this fire is going to become amazing

Lime Tonics
Nov 7, 2015

by FactsAreUseless
OP I get the gist of this but why give star citizen attention anymore.

It's a dying idea of gods and men , I get that, but having people aware of it makes the problem bigger.

Let reddit kill it this one time.

Blazing Ownager
Jun 2, 2007

by FactsAreUseless

Caesar Saladin posted:

its so weird that these people seem to accepting the fact that they will never get to play with half of the ships because they won't pay for them in real life. Like, they just shrug their shoulders and never get to experience most of the content in the game, and are tricked into purchasing just one ship and feeling ownership over it. Just like shrugging "Ahh well I'll never get to play with the super mega ship, I'm just not elite enough." A normal game would let you use all of the ships, they have forgotten this.

Remember when the ships were just to get funding to release the game and not a business in and of themselves? lol

Funny thing is as much as EA wanted SC you think they'd been all the gently caress over making their own space sim, and they'd beat SC to the punch, too. Then people could be spending money on packs of cards with ships on them instead

Manic Technophile
Nov 13, 2017

by FactsAreUseless

Vargs posted:

are the True Believers still going strong or has their fanbase finally started to turn?
5th highest voted submission of the past month:


But all the others are irrational exuberance so yeah, they've got a long and painful road to reality ahead.

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treerat
Oct 4, 2005
up here so high i start to shake up here so high the sky i scrape
i'm proud of u chris roberts, u got hustle and get the nerds riled up

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