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Alright it’s time to play Jumanji but if we don’t want to end up fighting crocodiles, getting menaced by spiders, or stalked by a lion we gotta figure out a game plan. We could try: -Having everyone roll the dice on their turn as fast as possible without pausing to read messages. We might finish in under a minute, or get halfway and be killed by a flood, stampede, and quicksand combo. -Play atop a wind turbine wearing hazmat suits. Would shield against ground animals and mosquitos, but leave us vulnerable to big game hunter sniper fire and an earthquake would be certain death. -Play one turn with rifles on hand, 50/50 odds whatever emerges would be killable. Live for 60 more years carefully tracking the stock market, then finish the game and warp back in time to corner the market. What are your suggestions for being in it to win it?
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 06:09 |
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# ? Mar 28, 2024 16:07 |
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I want to die so I’m just gonna play to die op
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 06:14 |
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Play the game in OPs moms basement. No wilder creature than that yeti, so I figure we’d be safe
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 06:17 |
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I like when the monkeys steal the police car
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 06:17 |
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 06:18 |
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Oh I know, I’ll bring my 20 sided dice
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 06:18 |
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Agreed. Do we even need "strategies" for a game where The Rock is a possible player character? I mean I guess if you're the loser stuck playing as Jack Black, then maybe.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 06:44 |
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My plan: Just keep yelling JUMANJI! JUMANJI! JUMaaaaa~shot dead.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 07:13 |
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The trick is to keep moving constantly. Don't give the danger time to get too dense in any one area, and already be leaving an area by the time a hazard starts to manifest (like those carnivorous plants).
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:01 |
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Send a couple of people in to chill while the other players figure out good stocks, lotto tickets and whatever to buy. Do multiple short playthroughs so none of your friends end up way older than you. Always pick The Rock.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:10 |
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Play in a major city. The National Guard will get called out to come shoot the lions and elephants and Ross from Friends will collect the monkey to live with him, then right before the last roll just live your life normally until you're about to die and then finish the game to be transported back to youth. You could essentially live forever by playing the game over and over.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:10 |
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if you cheat you get turned into a monkey, there has to be a way to use that to your advantage
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:11 |
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Cubone posted:if you cheat you get turned into a monkey, there has to be a way to use that to your advantage You don't know if you get turned into a monkey every time. That was just the instance we saw. You might end up as a banana slug.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:13 |
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Flip the board over and hang myself in a parkinson's-addled huff
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:13 |
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ima be the white race
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:16 |
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Applewhite posted:You don't know if you get turned into a monkey every time. That was just the instance we saw. You might end up as a banana slug. no natural predators
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:36 |
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Cubone posted:no natural predators Jumanji is, by definition, supernatural.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:37 |
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You think that english hunter guy ever said the n word? Holllaaaaa holllaaaaaa hollla
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:41 |
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Applewhite posted:Jumanji is, by definition, supernatural. hm yeah that hunter guy would probably gently caress me up if I was a banana slug back to the drawing board
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:47 |
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Play the game on a spacewalk. All the animals that spawn will die immediately and there is no land for earthquakes or atmosphere for bad weather.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 08:51 |
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Jumanji ruins everyone's goddamn lives. It's an evil pointless game.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 09:00 |
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CelticPredator posted:Jumanji ruins everyone's goddamn lives. It's an evil pointless game. Does it? I mean the Robin Williams character probably has PTSD after being in a jungle. Jenny, eh, has a deep understanding of how people can treat a person when they think she is crazy, but she has a leg up on the next 40 years. Though those two kids have no problems, and their parents live at the end.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 09:38 |
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Isolate the game board in a deep underground bunker, and everyone plays the game far away with remote controlled robot hands.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 10:15 |
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mazzi Chart Czar posted:Does it? I mean the Robin Williams character probably has PTSD after being in a jungle. Imagine living your whole life twice but the first half was filled with misery and horror. The new movie actually fixed that where it had the time periods be a bit different. 20 years in the game only felt like a few months. Tbh that’s a bit easier to swallow.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 10:22 |
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CelticPredator posted:Imagine living your whole life twice but the first half was filled with misery and horror. Whoa how about some spoiler tags you god drat r word
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 10:24 |
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I would be very good at jumanji because I would use my sporting skills to go big or go home and earn the final touchdown https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xl42ZHr7Xv4
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 10:56 |
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Applewhite posted:Play the game on a spacewalk. All the animals that spawn will die immediately and there is no land for earthquakes or atmosphere for bad weather. Thousands of fire ants spawn in your spacesuit.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 11:17 |
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Labes for days posted:Thousands of fire ants spawn in your spacesuit. The most painful way to die thread is thataway.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 11:19 |
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Labes for days posted:Thousands of fire ants spawn in your spacesuit. Coat yourself in insecticidal gel before putting it on.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 11:23 |
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Labes for days posted:Thousands of fire ants spawn in your spacesuit. jokes on you thats my fetish
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 11:25 |
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Applewhite posted:Play the game on a spacewalk. All the animals that spawn will die immediately and there is no land for earthquakes or atmosphere for bad weather. Dang that’s a good concept for the 3rd movie. Or a Mars mission. A massive stampede of rhinos and elephants asphyxiates immediately and NASA has 20 tons of protein to harvest. A tremendous flood would provide drinking water. Trap someone on Earth, launch the game to Mars, extract them there to save fuel. Dammit I want to see this movie now.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 16:47 |
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Applewhite posted:Play the game on a spacewalk. All the animals that spawn will die immediately and there is no land for earthquakes or atmosphere for bad weather. you can't roll dice in space ya dingus
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 17:50 |
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all the dangers in the new movie were caused because nobody blew out the game cartridge first.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 18:30 |
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I would become a badass jungle survivalist and grow a huge beard and do a bunch of cocaine and play videogames and then after a long career and battle with mental illness take my own life. Your move, game.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 18:42 |
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Cubone posted:no natural predators kids with bb guns
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 18:53 |
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Have everyone roll super fast, like boom boom boom boom. All the dangers descend on you at once, but maybe they'll start fighting each other and you quickly leave the area. Of course, this also has the chance to just compound the jungle animal menace, like making a lion that can shoot mosquitoes out of its mouth or something.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 18:56 |
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Where do the jumanji creatures live before they are summoned? Like where was that hunter before he got rolled in
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 19:31 |
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I can't believe jack black is getting paid to be in movies
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 19:48 |
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Paranoid Peanut posted:Where do the jumanji creatures live before they are summoned? Like where was that hunter before he got rolled in Hell dimension? Also, police officer David Alan Grier was nonchalant about the British hunter trying his best to kill him with a rifle. He didn’t report “attempted murderer on the loose” with his radio, just resumed searching for Robin Williams to ask questions about running into the street in odd clothes.
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 20:06 |
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# ? Mar 28, 2024 16:07 |
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ditty bout my clitty posted:I can't believe jack black is getting paid to be in movies Why not
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# ? Jan 14, 2018 20:07 |