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PT6A posted:You've, uh, made an error in your translation. Unless that's part of the joke and I'm not getting it? even if it's an error i move that it be accepted as a submission
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Feb 6, 2018 01:47
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GreyjoyBastard posted:even if it's an error i move that it be accepted as a submission Fair enough. False cognate cooking challenges could be an interesting new direction for the thread...
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Feb 6, 2018 02:29
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PT6A posted:You've, uh, made an error in your translation. Unless that's part of the joke and I'm not getting it?  This isn't culturally aware cuisine.
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Feb 6, 2018 07:41
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Tunicate posted:
Other dishes have been literal translations that turn out strange in English. Just using different words entirely makes no sense. I don't even speak French, but living in Canada you see French words on packages all the time and that translation immediately struck me as incorrect, so maybe that's colouring my perception relative to other examples which come from languages I don't know at all.
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Feb 6, 2018 14:59
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Jar of Arachides:
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Feb 6, 2018 16:19
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Well this was a fun read. I would love to see somebody have a go at burning love, a Danish dish. And if mistaken translations are allowed, forlorn hare. Calling dibs on Spaghetti in the style of whores, I'll have a whack at it today or tomorrow, ingredients allowing.
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Feb 6, 2018 18:49
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Hispanic! At The Disco posted:Jar of Arachides: 
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Feb 6, 2018 19:31
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Well that oughta teach me to check what thread I'm posting in first.
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Feb 6, 2018 22:45
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Whose to say that the French didn't name peanuts after spiders? After all, the British added an i to "aluminum" on a lark. And we insist on calling rock and roll with a southern accent "country music"
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Feb 6, 2018 22:57
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Fruits of the sea posted:Calling dibs on Spaghetti in the style of whores, I'll have a whack at it today or tomorrow, ingredients allowing. See? This is going to be funny, and it's based on an awkward but correct translation instead of imagined nonsense. (Also this is one of the few I know, I'm excited to see how your version compares)
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Feb 7, 2018 04:13
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Scarodactyl posted:Way to waste a perfectly good false cognate. I want spider sauce Why not both? I can probably pull something out of my rear end. The French considered peanuts to only be good as animal feed. To make matters worse, poor packing processes resulted in shipments to France being full of spiders. So the French went for a clever pun. They combined the Greek words arákhidna and arákhnē. These translate to spider, and chickling food. They specifically went with Greek because they considered the peanut beneath the French language. Thus peanuts were coined arachides. I'd imagine the creator of the recipe cackled like this after putting it on chicken or putting chicken into it. "Ha ha, mon ami, I am eating you using a sauce you cannot eat! It is beneath me but I use it to show you that you are even more beneath me!" That stereotypically French chef then spat on the ground after finishing his sentence. RandomPauI fucked around with this message at 05:24 on Feb 7, 2018 |
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Feb 7, 2018 05:21
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RandomPauI posted:Whose to say that the French didn't name peanuts after spiders? After all, the British added an i to "aluminum" on a lark. And we insist on calling rock and roll with a southern accent "country music" I don't. I call it rockabilly.
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Feb 7, 2018 05:40
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Fruits of the sea posted:I would love to see somebody have a go at burning love
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Feb 7, 2018 06:06
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As a Greek person, les françaises can le gently caress off! 
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Feb 7, 2018 08:26
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Just to be clear, my thing was pulling an etymological history from two real words so that the Arachnes recipe could work as peanut sauce and spider sauce.
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Feb 7, 2018 09:01
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PT6A posted:See? This is going to be funny, and it's based on an awkward but correct translation instead of imagined nonsense. Ahahaha, I just made the connection. It was already one of my favorite pasta dishes, now even moreso. (not really a spoiler, just didn't want to give even the vaguest of hints) Rollersnake fucked around with this message at 09:47 on Feb 7, 2018 |
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Feb 7, 2018 09:43
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Going to be bottling the Sonofabitch sauce today. Pray for me goons, as this poo poo is inevitably going to napalm my kitchen when I blend it.
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Feb 8, 2018 08:20
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Liquid Communism posted:Going to be bottling the Sonofabitch sauce today. Pray for me goons, as this poo poo is inevitably going to napalm my kitchen when I blend it. Good luck. I had to vent my entire apartment out for a few hours when I blended my ghost chili sauce. Was coughing and dripping for hours like I'd been pepper sprayed. It's pretty good sauce.
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Feb 8, 2018 08:22
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Grand Fromage posted:Good luck. I had to vent my entire apartment out for a few hours when I blended my ghost chili sauce. Was coughing and dripping for hours like I'd been pepper sprayed. I'm strongly considering blending out on my deck in the 10 degree air just to save my house from it.
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Feb 8, 2018 09:22
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Liquid Communism posted:I'm strongly considering blending out on my deck in the 10 degree air just to save my house from it. If yours involves ghost chili level peppers I strongly suggest you do so. It is unbelievable. I was lucky that the temperature and pollution were both good that day so I could air the place out.
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Feb 8, 2018 09:34
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Liquid Communism posted:Going to be bottling the Sonofabitch sauce today. Pray for me goons, as this poo poo is inevitably going to napalm my kitchen when I blend it. Good GodDAMN, wish I was there to lick the blender... Be safe, sonofabitch ghost!
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Feb 8, 2018 16:35
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I just got out of the shower. I've been crying. It was worth it. So, after four weeks of lactofermentation, our patient looks like this:  The peppers kept their color brilliantly, and were still a little bit firm to the touch. The pictures stop here, because I had to glove up to protect myself and my innocent neighbors from the coming apocalypse. Next off, I drained off the liquid and set it aside, then poured out the solids into a bowl. The star anise was located and pitched, as well as a couple of the garlic cloves because the scent was overpowering. The rest went into the blender. However, as you recall this was started out as Angry Tiger Sauce. Tiger's aren't just orange. We needed a little bit of black to go with it. Subtlety goes out the window with me some times, so I decided to go threefold. First, we have the star anise. That's black, right? Then the next step, powdered black pasilla chilies. Finally, some black sesame seed, because that sounds like a flavor that would go well in here. Add a bit of salt as well, and some powdered tamarind to introduce some sour opposite the sweetness of the peppers. Pulse this a couple times, then add back in the brine until it's at a consistency that seems good. I tasted it at this point, and promptly lost feeling in my mouth. It was pretty tasty for that first couple seconds, though! Very sweet and peppery. Might benefit from some vinegar, but I'm leaving it straight for now. Next up, the problem of storage. If I leave this open, my whole fridge is going to murder me any time I touch it. I'm not having any of that, so we need an answer. 5oz shaker bottles to the rescue! All in all, 1lb of peppers and 2/3 quart of brine made 15oz of finished sauce. I'll have to find a friend to offload one of these on, as it's too hot for me to drink straight.  Then of course, like a dumbass, I hit the blender with hot water and the steam cloud maced me.
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Feb 8, 2018 17:54
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 E: it pleases me to no end the way this thread has led to people creating irl things that didn't ever exist before (some of which didn't need to exist, but this is not one of those).
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Feb 8, 2018 19:09
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It sounds delicious and I feel like I can smell it through my screen. I want to have a sip. Could I call dibs on garbage plate?
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Feb 8, 2018 19:51
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Liquid Communism posted:I just got out of the shower. I've been crying. Innagaddadavita! I wish I lived closer. I would adopt the spare and give it a good and loving home.
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Feb 9, 2018 22:13
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Liquid Communism posted:I just got out of the shower. I've been crying. nice so, the sauce that i'm talking about is basically the house sauce that Hmong people serve with every meal, that you can add to your food/dip food into/etc. i don't have a full recipe but the one i've had personally has these ingredients: quote:Cilantro these aren't the same as i just posted but here are some similar recipes: https://www.splendidtable.org/recipes/hot-chili-condiment https://www.saveur.com/article/recipes/cilantro-bud-hot-sauce-hmong also check out some cool articles about a local guy here repping Hmong cuisine: http://www.startribune.com/an-introduction-to-hmong-food-from-a-twin-cities-teacher-and-chef/450447733/ https://www.pri.org/stories/2017-11-23/how-chef-yia-vang-putting-his-own-twist-hmong-cuisine Lutha Mahtin fucked around with this message at 05:33 on Feb 10, 2018 |
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Feb 10, 2018 05:30
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That sounds pretty tasty. May have to make some up, for all that sugar is anathema to me just now.
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Feb 10, 2018 06:40
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Think I need both them sons of bitches in my kitchen.
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Feb 10, 2018 20:24
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Spaghetti in the style of whores is done! It was... Ok? I'll post pics on monday probably when there is time. Tiggum posted:I'll have a go at this one. Awesome. Looking forward to seeing what you come up with.
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Feb 10, 2018 21:20
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Fruits of the sea posted:Spaghetti in the style of whores is done! It was... Ok? Awesome, I can't wait to see what you came up with. I was thinking of other possible dishes for people to make, too. Does anyone want to attempt Bone Hole?
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Feb 10, 2018 22:27
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PT6A posted:Awesome, I can't wait to see what you came up with. I'm not willing to commit to this because I don't have a lot of time for cooking lately, and if I do attempt it it'll be the weekend at the earliest...but I have an idea.
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Feb 13, 2018 02:47
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Liquid Communism posted:That sounds pretty tasty. May have to make some up, for all that sugar is anathema to me just now. i will say that the one version i've had (which was made in the kitchen of the dude from those articles  ) didn't ever strike me as sweet. maybe if i had it again and was looking for that flavor i would taste it, but it wasn't something that ever occurred to me when eating it "blind"
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Feb 14, 2018 01:48
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With regret, I will have to release my claim on Garbage Plate--after doing a bit of preliminary preparations I realized my vision for it couldn't be accomplished within my own unfortunate dietary restrictions (no red meat or fatty dairy). However, I won't leave the thread hanging, as I have instead madeTunicate posted:Sauce Arachide Ivorienne au poulet So, let's lay the groundwork here. First, I'm going to take the translation as given because it's a really funny false cognate (which I would have easily fallen for) and if translated correctly the dish is almost a total nonstarter for this thread. So let's move past that. From having once seen it in a restaurant ad I know it is a dish from northwest Africa. I don't know that much about the region so I'm going to have to play this by ear. Clearly I need chicken, an ivory sauce and something to make that sauce spidery. For starters, I assumed that the chicken is probably fairly normal, maybe marinated and grilled. I got four thighs and then looked around for ingredients that felt right for the marinate: Gimme ingredients: salt, garlic, spring onions, 1/8 cup of sugar.  Cider vinegar I cooked the leftover pepper bits from pickling peppers.  Vodka I soaked powder made from home-grown ornamental peppers in back when I was in highschool  Grains of paradise aka alligator pepper. I first heard of this in the novel Things Fall Apart--yes, that was set on the opposite end of the continent but it was mentioned as a major trade commodity so it's not outside the bounds of reason. Alligator pepper is like a slightly fruity, slightly piney tasting peppercorn. I put a lot in.  And to round it out, a prickly pear! Scarodactyl you moron, you may be thinking, everyone knows that prickly pears are native to the new world. However, thanks to an odd flash of non-cultural-ignorance I also know that they are an invasive species in many areas of the world including northwest Africa, so it would make sense for them to be incorporated into local cuisine.  What I don't know is, how do you use prickly pears for anything. It feels hard and unripe so I put it on the George Foreman to pacify it, then cut it open.  Make sure to separate the hard, unchewable seeds before you add this to the marinate or you will have to pick them out by hand later.  So that did it for the chicken. I let it marinate overnight Day 2, the sauce. As an ivory sauce it clearly needed to be white, which suggested a cream sauce (or rather, a coconut cream sauce given my allergy). So I picked out some quality white ingredients:  Coconut cream, easily collected by putting a dollar tree can of coconut milk in the fridge and letting it separate.  Spring onions (white part only)  Half a rutabaga, sliced into tiny slivers  8 cloves of garlic  White peppercorns, abundantly applied.  Fry the vegetables together in coconut oil to soften them up.  Add coconut cream, turn to low, salt to taste. With the sauce coming along nicely I put the chicken in a baking pan with white onions, the green parts of the spring onions and the remaining rutabaga and popped it on the grill.  One element was missing, which was of course the spider in the spider sauce. I considered a copout by making it spicy (it has a bite!) but decided to go in a different direction. As everyone knows spider has a sweet, distinctly flavored meat, but there isn't enough on one to really justify all the shelling involved. What they're really known for culinarily is their caviar, and I decided to try to simulate that instead with tapioca. Making tapioca pearls (or boba) is fairly straightforward. You just have to mix 1 part boiling water with about 2 parts tapioca starch, make a dough, shape it into balls and boil it.  I also wanted them to be yellow. I first tried boiling annato in the water before mixing the dough to add yellow color, but the coloration was too weak  so I had to turn to this saffron powder I got with a bunch of stuff from my grandma. It's probably 20 years old, so there's no flavor left at all but it sure makes things yellow.  That's more like it.   About 10 minutes of boiling later and they've gone nice and translucent.  Just like the spider laid it! In the mean time, I turned the chicken a couple of times and finished it directly on the grill.   All together on the plate. The verdict? It's surprisingly good. The chicken came up nicely, and the ivory sauce on its own is pretty decent too, with a creamy, garlicky peppery taste. The spider eggs can be a bit of a drag since the boba are basically flavorless (definitely something to address if anyone makes this again), but with a bit of the caramelized onion from the chicken for flavor and texture contrast it works a lot better.
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Feb 14, 2018 02:26
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That's brilliant. Also my mind is loving blown, I somehow just now made the connection that tapioca = yuca = cassava. 
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Feb 14, 2018 03:21
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Scarodactyl posted:
But this picture makes my hands itchy. I try to avoid touching prickly pears directly, I am far too likely to absent-mindedly scratch my face.
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Feb 14, 2018 20:50
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Dr. Kloctopussy posted:refried beans are hella refried, they are the leftover whole beans from yesterday cooked down with lard into delicious mush. Agreed. Boil, mash, fry in fat-back, put away in the fridge, save. When wanted, put a good dollop of lard in a pan and then "re-fry" them for serving. The original Spanish word doesn't matter when translated to English. De re (on the nature of) refried beans is the silliest argument in the world. English is a malleable language. One may as well argue that pot-stickers are a lie because it's not really made of marijuana that has been made into a trans-dermal patch. Or that they are really decorations for cooking vessels. Or that they are, technically, adhesives used to secure a particular type of metal to a particular substrate. To quote Bill Watterson "I love verbing nouns. It weirds the language." You can do that in English. Embrace it.
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Feb 18, 2018 05:25
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I've got leftovers in the fridge I think will be suitable for Minnesota Sushi, going to pick something up from Publix for my stab at this hopefully in the next two days. Edit : god drat that was tasty but the photos are awful, the red balance is terrible on this camera. Hold on a tick while I fix this poo poo and not make it look like hospital food. Suspect Bucket fucked around with this message at 00:19 on Feb 22, 2018 |
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Feb 21, 2018 17:10
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I am Swedish and Norwegian. The blood of the vikings and the Lutherans runs strong in my veins! By some freak chance, when my people immigrated to the US, instead of walking backwards and giving the finger to Ellis Island on their way to the great north, my ancestors rolled through, saw the city, and went "Hey, this aint half bad. Or, we are too broke to keep going. One of those. Let's be New Yorkers for the next three generations." And so they did. As a result, I grew up with a really weird mix of traditional Lutheran julekaga, krumkaka, kjottboller, and stuff for holidays, but most of the time ate pizza, bagels, hot dogs, fried chicken, tons of pasta, the whole deal. When we did eat 'fancy' food, it was Italian or Greek. When I got home from my weekend in the everglades, mom and dad high-fived me on their own way out the door, and said 'leftovers in the fridge, have a nice week' as they went on their own merry way to their condo in south florida. Leftovers were white rice, green beans, peas, and spinach. I go, "Hey, those seem like the start to that thing I said I'd do like a month ago. TO PUBLIX!" So then I went on my merry way to that land of delights and a thousand smiles, everyone's favorite grocer /sandwitch place / fried chicken provider / butcher /decent fish selection. I roll on up to the fish counter, make eye contact with the fishmonger, which here in the south, is a dangerous thing to do because those guys are BORED TO DEATH back there and will take any pretense at human contact to strike up a conversation and sell you fish. We chatted a moment, and glory of glories, fresh catfish fillets are on sale! I order up a fine half pound piece, and skip merrily on my way to the produce. There, angels sung and a bright beam of light shone on the pre-slices white mushrooms, also on sale. And then I got a case of beer because I don't have to go to work until friday. When it came time to cook, I had a pretty good idea of what I wanted to do. First, I got a good spoonfull of bacon dripings on the pan, warmed that up while I chopped an onion, which I added to the pan with the pound of mushrooms, a spoonfull of chopped garlic, and a spoonfull of ground ginger. About 2 teaspoon each I'd say. I wanted to brown everything off nice and sweet, so low and slow was the goal. Fortunately, my sister called, so we had a nice old chat for about 15 minutes while the onions and mushrooms browned down. When I got off the phone, they were perfect, so I took them off the pan and put them aside. I then put the pan back on the range, put a little fresh veg oil in, and got my catfish out. While the pan came to temp, I cut the fillet in half, and dredged the peices in medium ground corm meal with salt, pepper, and general purpose meat seasoning that was lying around and I needed to finish up. I don't like a heavy breading when I cook for myself, it's a pain. The oil was medium hot, and the fillets cooked nicely for about 6 minutes a side. While the fish cooked, I put two good blops of Dukes Mayonaise in the mushrooms, and a squeeze of wasabi that was in the fridge. Once the fish was done, that went to the side, and the spinach in the pan with a pat of butter. That just cooked off the residual heat of the pan until wilted. also got up all the nice crispies and bits of cornmeal that came off the fish. Finally, I tossed the rice, green beans, and peas in the pan, and just re-heated them. Then, I did a poo poo job of plating!  My original goal was to present it a bit nicer and make it a bit more like sushi, but the rice was not sticking together and bleh, whatever. But you know what, it tasted great! And I have seconds for tomorrow. the horseradish mayo in the mushrooms is amazing with the fish. I am aware of 'hot dish', but never really eaten it. I am assuming that Minnesotan Sushi is some kind of hot dish with tuna fish and rice and cream of mushroom. But that's not how I roll. edit: I JUST LOOKED UP WHAT IT ACTUALLY IS AND HOLY poo poo I WANT THAT Suspect Bucket fucked around with this message at 01:36 on Feb 22, 2018 |
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Feb 22, 2018 01:28
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I don't think you got one thing right I love it.
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Feb 22, 2018 02:39
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I just looked it up and threw up in my mouth a little. I like your ignorant version so much better.
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Feb 22, 2018 06:43
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