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Who should get the final Elimination Chamber Spot?
This poll is closed.
Finn Balor 5 6.58%
Seth Rollins 0 0%
Squeeze them both into one pod 35 46.05%
Give THE BIG DOG! two pods to himself 36 47.37%
Total: 76 votes
[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

 
  • Locked thread
Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?



Thanks Abroham Lincoln! Click picture to see Champs
____________________________

Raw Results
  • John Cena opened the show, insisting he HAD to win Elimination Chamber or else he had no path to Wrestlemania. So he was determined to win it, to face Brock Lesnar at Wrestlemania and win the Universal Championship. Miz came out and insisted HE would be the one to win the Elimination Chamber and beat Brock at Wrestlemania.

  • Cena challenged Miz to a match in which the loser would be the FIRST to fight in the Elimination Chamber. Miz started to ask why he would agree to that then had Bo and Curtis Axel jump Cena, beat him down and THEN accepted his challenge. Kurt Angle came out and agreed this match would happen, but only if Bo and Curtis were banned from ringside.

  • John Cena defeated The Miz in a pretty entertaining match, meaning that The Miz will now be the first to enter the Elimination Chamber.

  • Woken Matt Hardy did a video promo insisting he would win the Fatal Fourway and turn the Elimination Chamber into the DELETION CHAMBER!

  • Anderson and Gallows talked backstage about the Revival being nerds. WWE put a nerd-o-meter on the screen and included the text graphics that have been plaguing Smackdown the last couple of weeks.

  • The Revival defeated Anderson and Gallows. They jumped them before the match began, then had a regular match before hitting the Shatter Machine on Anderson to get the pin.

  • Kurt Angle announced that Ronda Rousey will be signing her Raw contract at Elimination Chamber, and that Jason Jordan's neck surgery means he will miss Wrestlemania. Kurt called out the crowd for cheering Jordan's injury and asked them to "wish him get better wishes." Seth came out and did wish Jordan the best for his recovery, talked up how his own injury derailed him but made his return all the sweeter. Kurt offered him a new partner for another tag title shot, but Seth declined, saying he wanted to BE Monday Night Raw, he wanted Brock Lesnar and the Universal Title. So he wanted to be added to the Fatal Fourway to get a shot at the Elimination Chamber. Kurt wasn't sure but polled the crowd and agreed to make it a Fatal Fiveway.

  • Bray Wyatt did a spooky promo about how he was a hungry shark and was gonna eat everybody.

  • Titus O'Neil, Mark Henry, Alexa Bliss were part of a video package piece on the Freedom Rides from the Civil Rights movement.

  • Bayley defeated Sasha with a Super Bayley-to-Belly from the middle rope, after a lengthy and quite fun match. After the match Bayley was celebrating but stopped to commiserate with Sasha. Before anything could happen one way or the other, Nia Jax barged through them both. Nia was interviewed on the ramp after the beatdown and said that her destruction of the two of them in seconds compared with how much Asuka struggled to beat both.

  • Roman and Seth were talking backstage about the Elimination Chamber when The Bar showed up to make fun of them.

  • A video package of facts/statistics about Asuka's undefeated streak played and was pretty cool.

  • Titus took over an interview of Apollo Crews to discuss his spot in the Fatal Fiveway for the last spot on the Elimination Chamber. Dana Brooke studiously took notes.

  • Alexa met with Mickie James backstage and tried to clear the air with Mickie who wasn't buying it. Alexa pushed the idea that they needed to take out Absolution to prevent them running over the entire women's division. Mickie said she would be happy to team with Alexa against Absolution but come Elimination Chamber she would be doing what she could to get her title.

  • Absolution defeated Alexa and Mickie James, after Mickie was left isolated in the ring. Alexa rushed into the ring after the match and fought off Absolution who were trying to put a beatdown on Mickie.

  • Elias came out and did an amazing promo/song, and then:


    :vince:

  • Elias demanded that Braun and he settle this like men rather than using their instruments. Braun was happy to accept but when Elias jumped him and then went for his guitar, Braun obliterated him. As Elias crawled up the ramp, Braun followed and smashed him with the Bass.

  • Finn did a backstage cameraphone promo saying he didn't care what anybody else wanted, he wanted but he always had: The Universal Championship.

  • Roman Reigns defeated Sheamus in a good match that got plenty of time and had a pretty hot crowd.

  • Ivory is being inducted into the 2018 Hall of Fame.

  • Seth Rollins AND Finn Balor got a double-pin on Bray Wyatt, both claiming victory in the Fatal Fiveway that also featured Matt Hardy and Apollo Crews. Both argued with the referee they should be the last participant in the Elimination Chamber PPV as the show went off the air.
____________________________

Smackdown Results
  • Dolph Ziggler came out to open the show with his match against Baron Corbin to decide who gets added to the Fastlane title shot. Ziggler's theme now STARTS with the record scratch to interupt... nothing? And then after walking out in silence they play his theme anyway.

  • Corbin never showed up, as he was getting the poo poo kicked out of him in the back by Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens. They then came out to get Ziggler, who tried to jump Sami first but got double-teamed. Corbin raced back out to fight more but got taken out too.

  • Becky Lynch and Naomi came to ringside to offer support and protection to Charlotte as she fought Sarah Logan with the Riott Squad at ringside. Charlotte defeated Logan, which only leaves Ruby Riott for her to beat to clean-sweep them.

  • Shane met Bryan backstage to complain about Kevin and Sami's actions, didn't let him answer and then explained that both Ziggler and Corbin would be facing Sami and Kevin in singles matches, and if they won they would be added to the Fastlane main event (so either a Fourway or a Fiveway). He then told Bryan that if either of his "boys" got involved in the other's match, they would be taken out of the Fastlane match. Bryan seemed completely fine with all of this.

  • Seth Rollins, Sasha Banks was shown in a Black History month package focusing on the Montgomery Bus Boycott.

  • Baron Corbin defeated Kevin Owens in a lengthy match to get a spot in the Fastlane main event.

  • Bobby Roode did a promo saying he was inspired by and aimed to one day surpass John Cena, whose US Open challenge gimmick he is continuing. He commented on Roode hitting him from behind with an RKO, and said he wanted whoever answered his challenge to meet him face-to-face. Randy Orton answered the challenge, but as he arrived to the ring, Jinder Mahal interupted to talk trash about Orton's placement on last week's top 10 list. Orton said he didn't give a poo poo about any list, Roode mocked Jinder for not getting on it and then questioned whether Randy was only at #9 because he always attacks people outta nowhere. Orton took out the surviving Singh brother with an RKO by way of demonstration which kicked off a brawl, with Jinder taking advantage to lay out both Roode and Orton.

  • The New Day came out to do a pancake eating contest with BIG E, but by the time Gable and Benjamin came out to mock them, he'd gotten up to a grand total of 0 pancakes eaten. Gable and Benjamin made fun of New Day and threw their pancakes on the floor, causing BIG E to lose his mind and Kofi and Xavier have to restrain him. The crowd seemed mostly bewildered by this segment (as was I).

  • The New Day (Kofi and BIG E) defeated Chad Gable and Shelton Benjamin in a tag team match.

  • Renee interviewed Dolph Ziggler backstage about his opportunity to get into Fastlane. He said Kevin and Sami knew he was a true threat which is why they attacked him, and the only reason he had returned to WWE was to do the one thing that had always eluded him: Main Event Wrestlemania.

  • The Usos were doing a really neat, well shot prepackaged promo marred by those dumb text graphics, which suddenly shifted to a transition of the video being watched on a flatscreen by the Bludgeon Brothers, who smashed the screen.

  • Kevin apologized to Sami backstage but promised they would be fine. Sami corrected him, there is no "we" in the title match at Fastlane, where it will be every man for himself.

  • Dolph Ziggler defeated Sami Zayn with his precious HBK-Superkick-Flop-Into-A-Pin move, making the Fastlane PPV into a Fatal Fiveway. Ziggler finished the show being touted by the commentators as a fan favorite so I guess he's a face again now?
____________________________

Jerusalem fucked around with this message at 04:02 on Feb 14, 2018

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Ragnarok the Red
Jun 21, 2002
Well Rollins/Balor should be good next week.

Though them having to share a pod would be way funnier.

Destroy My Sweater
Jul 24, 2009

rollins/balor mecha shiva in the chamber

Professor Funk
Aug 4, 2008

WE ALL KNOW WHAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN
That was a decent raw, Cena/Miz was good, Bayley/Sasha was good, Reigns/Sheamus was good, etc.

Wet fart of an ending though...I guess Seth and Finn will wrestle next week for the final spot?

DarkstarIV
Apr 6, 2010

OFFICIAL RACIST
Nia's delusional heel promos are sorta...a thing? I mean its obvious to anyone with two braincells that Nia would struggle (read: lose to either of them, since Nia is a bigger loser than Bayley, winrate wise) with either of those two women if they were fresh, but I think Nia's new gimmick is being stupid. Then again it doesn't matter, since Nia is almost certainly losing at Elimination Chamber anyways.

DarkstarIV fucked around with this message at 05:15 on Feb 13, 2018

Dango Bango
Jul 26, 2007

***** OP

MJeff
Jun 2, 2011

THE LIAR
So, y'know, about WWE reuniting the PPVs due to crappy ticket sales. This is just a thought, but maybe:
1) Putting one of your championships on a jobber.
2) Having your other championship off TV for months at a time.

Was more to blame for the low ticket sales?

Do it ironically
Jul 13, 2010

by Pragmatica
that segment with elias and braun i giggled and laughed the whole time it was some of the most fun i've had watching a raw in a very, very long time, god drat i love elias and braun, why can't a whole show be as amazing as that segment, man, who would have thought elias would be so over and they would also let braun show personality

great raw just because of that

SamuraiFoochs
Jan 16, 2007




Grimey Drawer
They're getting rid of brand exclusive PPVs and it's loving awful. Like apparently weekly TV won't be affected but it will lead to bloated cards, no exposure to undercard acts, and even less of a reason to give a gently caress about TV.

On the brighter side, everything with Braun was the best.

Also yeah the whole thing happened because of Brock and to a lesser extent Jinder.

Professor Funk
Aug 4, 2008

WE ALL KNOW WHAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN

SamuraiFoochs posted:

Also yeah the whole thing happened because of Brock and to a lesser extent Jinder.

*puts on tinfoil hat*

maybe wwe knew that absent champion brock lesnar would draw really poorly and created that situation on purpose to make the inevitable reign of the big dog look better by comparison

MJeff
Jun 2, 2011

THE LIAR
Does anybody know how many PPVs there'll be in 2018? If you're uniting the cards, it doesn't make any sense to do more than 12.

Havoc904
Jul 29, 2006

A school festival is a festival that takes place at our school!
They will both be put in the chamber match to start it out as a triple threat. Then Miz gets to complain about how unfair it is to him.

achillesforever6
Apr 23, 2012

psst you wanna do a communism?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42lvD9pYQ1E
I'm basically Konnor in this video

fart blood
Sep 13, 2008

by VideoGames

VJeff posted:

Does anybody know how many PPVs there'll be in 2018? If you're uniting the cards, it doesn't make any sense to do more than 12.

Last time they reunited the PPVs they still had a lot.

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


fart blood posted:

Last time they reunited the PPVs they still had a lot.

Yeah, the only thing it really causes them to think if the issues continue historically is that the people they have on the roster is the problem, not the overkill in terms of sheer amount of programs

Charles Gnarwin
Jul 31, 2014

I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.
:boom:
he knows...


That ref should not have counted a fall unless he knew who the winner would be. For a company that had "don't make the ref look bad" In their official rules, they sure love to have endings that make refs look like idiots.

Aphrodite
Jun 27, 2006

They already cut a couple of PPVs from this year.

Professor Funk
Aug 4, 2008

WE ALL KNOW WHAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN
Ok then

https://twitter.com/WrestlingSheet/status/963269769641316353

edit:

https://twitter.com/WWE/status/963272936609275904

Professor Funk fucked around with this message at 05:46 on Feb 13, 2018

STAC Goat
Mar 12, 2008

Watching you sleep.

Butt first, let's
check the feeds.

Wait, is that real?

lol

Do it ironically
Jul 13, 2010

by Pragmatica
so vince was mad about the leak that finn got the last spot lmao

FUCKFACE MORON
Apr 23, 2010

by sebmojo
The only thing missing from the ending to RAW was Tony Schiavone screaming "WE'RE OUT OF TIME SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!"

MJeff
Jun 2, 2011

THE LIAR
Let me use my Magic Wrestling Telescope to look a month into the future.

Cole: "The Big Dog, Roman Reigns, who won the first SEVEN-MAN Elimination Chamber last month!"
Graves: "Winning the Elimination Chamber is a difficult enough task, but Roman Reigns did it while beating SIX men instead of just five!"

Ah, I see.

Tato
Jun 19, 2001

DIRECTIVE 236: Promote pro-social values
So Braun Strowman is very big. He's tall. He's a hoss. He destroys people and the fans cheer. They are already chanting his new catchphrase and love him. He also has a weird charisma and is able to deliver silly promos and poo poo in a way that gets him cheered. In all aspects he is Vince's wet dream of a champion.

Why the gently caress are we getting the umpteenth failed coronation of Roman Reigns instead of going all in on Braun?

Dangerous Person
Apr 4, 2011

Not dead yet
Thank you Jerusalem

shiksa
Nov 9, 2009

i went to one of these wrestling shows and it was... honestly? frickin boring. i wanna see ricky! i want to see his gold chains and respect for the ftw lifestyle

VJeff posted:

Let me use my Magic Wrestling Telescope to look a month into the future.

Cole: "The Big Dog, Roman Reigns, who won the first SEVEN-MAN Elimination Chamber last month!"
Graves: "Winning the Elimination Chamber is a difficult enough task, but Roman Reigns did it while beating SIX men instead of just five!"

Ah, I see.

brock lesnar is getting bobby lashley sewn onto his torso in time for mania.

STAC Goat
Mar 12, 2008

Watching you sleep.

Butt first, let's
check the feeds.

Man, I just really think you Braun fans should prepare yourself. Tonight you may have laughed but Braun took his first step down a long and treacherous WWE road.

MJeff
Jun 2, 2011

THE LIAR

STAC Goat posted:

Man, I just really think you Braun fans should prepare yourself. Tonight you may have laughed but Braun took his first step down a long and treacherous WWE road.

Yeah, we just took one big ol' step towards this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kAByGHSSXiQ

I mean it was great, don't get me wrong, but, uh, I'm worried.

Ragnarok the Red
Jun 21, 2002

Tato posted:

So Braun Strowman is very big. He's tall. He's a hoss. He destroys people and the fans cheer. They are already chanting his new catchphrase and love him. He also has a weird charisma and is able to deliver silly promos and poo poo in a way that gets him cheered. In all aspects he is Vince's wet dream of a champion.

Why the gently caress are we getting the umpteenth failed coronation of Roman Reigns instead of going all in on Braun?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKUMV_YXCGw&t=

FUCKFACE MORON
Apr 23, 2010

by sebmojo

Tato posted:

So Braun Strowman is very big. He's tall. He's a hoss. He destroys people and the fans cheer. They are already chanting his new catchphrase and love him. He also has a weird charisma and is able to deliver silly promos and poo poo in a way that gets him cheered. In all aspects he is Vince's wet dream of a champion.

Why the gently caress are we getting the umpteenth failed coronation of Roman Reigns instead of going all in on Braun?
Because The Big Dog is The Guy drat it, and Vince will not quit shoving Roman down our throats until he gets that Jesus pop Vince so desperately wants


Speaking of Vince, I wish he'd gently caress off forever and focus on his dumb football league

CubsWoo
Aug 17, 2005

Where the big boys RAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGH FUCK YOU
big braun diaper baby

Abroham Lincoln
Sep 19, 2011

Note to self: This one's the good one



CubsWoo posted:

big braun diaper baby

https://streamable.com/4v2i1

Ragnarok the Red
Jun 21, 2002

piss tape israel posted:

Because The Big Dog is The Guy drat it, and Vince will not quit shoving Roman down our throats until he gets that Jesus pop Vince so desperately wants


Speaking of Vince, I wish he'd gently caress off forever and focus on his dumb football league

The funny thing is if they actually had turned Roman 1.5 years ago when they teased HHH making him the new Authority Corporate Champ and he'd gone on to have feuds with Seth returning as a white hot babyface, AJ, then against Braun who'd change from heel to anti-hero like he is now, because of him putting over those guys and his improved wrestling he may have built up enough good will with the audience to turn him face again by this year. The Authority switching to back Brock this Wrestlemania because Heyman convinces them he's unbeatable and the Shield reuniting at Mania to a nuclear pop might have propelled him forward with enough positive momentum to truly be Cena's successor. Seth would come out of it looking better than he does now too.

But Vince will just keep hammering that round peg into the square hole until we're numb to it instead :bahgawd:

ChrisBTY
Mar 29, 2012

this glorious monument

Tato posted:

So Braun Strowman is very big. He's tall. He's a hoss. He destroys people and the fans cheer. They are already chanting his new catchphrase and love him. He also has a weird charisma and is able to deliver silly promos and poo poo in a way that gets him cheered. In all aspects he is Vince's wet dream of a champion.

Why the gently caress are we getting the umpteenth failed coronation of Roman Reigns instead of going all in on Braun?

Because Braun is the next incarnation of Kane/Big Show ie: the multitool that you can easily build up to be a monster of the week for dudes like Reigns because he's so naturally menacing but then you can flip the switch and have him do silly poo poo while he's not needed in the main event scene.

projecthalaxy
Dec 27, 2008

Yes hello it is I Kurt's Secret Son


I gotta say, as the new "the writers didn't know what to do with this segment so we will just cut to _____", braun is a lot better than hornswoggle

CarlCX
Dec 14, 2003

ChrisBTY posted:

Because Braun is the next incarnation of Kane/Big Show ie: the multitool that you can easily build up to be a monster of the week for dudes like Reigns because he's so naturally menacing but then you can flip the switch and have him do silly poo poo while he's not needed in the main event scene.

This, pretty much.

Braun is a perfect fit as a staple WWE main eventer, but the coveted position of The Guy has always been people Vince sees as having crossover appeal--Rock, Michaels, Cena, Orton, Roman--people in that sweet spot of "credible wrestling competitors but you could kind of see them being in a movie." Braun's great, but he's a 6'8" country monster with murder eyes and a giant beard who yells a lot and is really strong. He's a wrestling-rear end wrestling character, and the WWE doesn't want those kinds of wrestlers as the face of the company. (But in a post-Rock world they also don't want people to get too crossovery for risk of losing them.)

I'm really glad Braun gets to show some personality on the canon show, but yeah, they could totally overcorrect and make him Comedy Braun and it would be the worst.

Molestationary Store
May 21, 2007

Tato posted:

So Braun Strowman is very big. He's tall. He's a hoss. He destroys people and the fans cheer. They are already chanting his new catchphrase and love him. He also has a weird charisma and is able to deliver silly promos and poo poo in a way that gets him cheered. In all aspects he is Vince's wet dream of a champion.

Why the gently caress are we getting the umpteenth failed coronation of Roman Reigns instead of going all in on Braun?

Cause he's (not really) The Rock's cousin.

Jetfire
Apr 29, 2008
If you told me 18 months ago the best part of Raw would be a sing-off between Braun Strowman and Elias Samson I would have ... demanded you time-travel me to that moment right the gently caress away

CubsWoo
Aug 17, 2005

Where the big boys RAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRGH FUCK YOU

this video is nearly three years old





THIS VIDEO IS NEARLY THREE YEARS OLD

NowonSA
Jul 19, 2013

I am the sexiest poster in the world!
I was thinking they'd just start with 3 guys, but having 2 guys stuck in one pod is hilarious and I hope they do it. They did that tag team Elimination chamber, so there's precedent for 2 peeps in a pod.

Also it's kind of crazy to picture Finn and Seth just murdering each other in close quarters once the bell rings since they're going to be future opponents anyway, then their turn comes up, the pod is unlocked and both their bodies just slump to the floor outside.

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Blaise330
Aug 13, 2007

GOD'S FAVORITE CHAMPION
Feels like there’s some kind of political joke somewhere about how the second women get their 6 person chamber match the men get a 7 person one. Then again the women one does have the title and having different amounts of competitors kinda solve the issue since mitb where every theme pay per view is “k we’ll run one match.... then the gender swap version of that identical match”

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