The Final Fantasy VII remake

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > The Final Fantasy VII remake

Who What Now: Sep 10, 2006; by Azathoth

scott zoloft posted:

buddy I know what you mean, but I really think they're going to pull out all the stunts for this remake. I think it'll be primarily ffxv style combat with an optional classic battle mode.

The only stunts they're gonna pull is with how much of the game will be locked behind paid DLC.

# ? Feb 17, 2018 20:33

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# ? May 1, 2024 17:32

bradzilla: Oct 15, 2004

I just bought FF7 for probably the 4th time so I can play the New Threat mod thanks to this thread

# ? Feb 17, 2018 20:34

Time_pants: Jun 25, 2012; Now sauntering to the ring, please welcome the lackadaisical style of the man who is always doing something...

Who What Now posted:

The only stunts they're gonna pull is with how much of the game will be locked behind paid DLC.

I guess the pulling of additional stunts depends on whether you consider sanitizing anything weird, quirky, off-beat, or potentially offensive completely out of existence a "stunt."

# ? Feb 17, 2018 20:45

scott zoloft: Dec 7, 2015; yeah same

Nefarious 2.0 posted:

lol enjoy your type-0 combat and nothing else

is type 0 combat good? is it like kingdom hearts?

# ? Feb 17, 2018 21:00

Who What Now: Sep 10, 2006; by Azathoth

scott zoloft posted:

is type 0 combat good? is it like kingdom hearts?

Oh, you sweet summer child, no... no...

# ? Feb 17, 2018 21:14

scott zoloft: Dec 7, 2015; yeah same

I really want to enjoy ff7 so I hope it's like what I said.

Also, playing the Secret of Mana hd remaster right now and it's really bad and I'm experiencing hella buyer's remorse in all 40 of thos dollars.

# ? Feb 17, 2018 21:18

myDad: Jan 20, 2010; ce n'est pas ma m�re; College Slice

scott zoloft posted:

I really want to enjoy ff7 so I hope it's like what I said.

Also, playing the Secret of Mana hd remaster right now and it's really bad and I'm experiencing hella buyer's remorse in all 40 of thos dollars.

40 buckaroos? lmao

# ? Feb 17, 2018 21:23

bloom: Feb 25, 2017; by sebmojo

There's a pc remaster of XII now but the combat in that always looked terrible and it's 50 bucks so lol nope.

# ? Feb 17, 2018 21:57

scott zoloft: Dec 7, 2015; yeah same

myDad posted:

40 buckaroos? lmao

i'm not smart. i didn't even bother looking at the trailer.

it feels like maps and sprite movement scripts were all exported from the SNES game, which makes it feel and look awkward. it's basically the old SNES game except now it has bad voiceovers and updated movement. and it's 40 loving dollars.

# ? Feb 17, 2018 22:22

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

scott zoloft posted:

is type 0 combat good? is it like kingdom hearts?

Yes, in that they both are not good games.

# ? Feb 17, 2018 23:12

Who What Now: Sep 10, 2006; by Azathoth

Solice Kirsk posted:

Yes, in that they both are not good games.

KH2 is a very good action-RPG. It's bad for reasons entirely unrelated to gameplay.

# ? Feb 17, 2018 23:13

Revins: Nov 2, 2007; tune the FM in to static and pretend that its the sea

bradzilla posted:

I just bought FF7 for probably the 4th time so I can play the New Threat mod thanks to this thread

New Threat mod makes the gameplay 100% better in almost every way, though some of the re-worked bosses have slightly dumb gimmicks

# ? Feb 17, 2018 23:17

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

Who What Now posted:

KH2 is a very good action-RPG. It's bad for reasons entirely unrelated to gameplay.

If all I wanted out of a game was fun gameplay then I'd play Blades of Steel. RPGs are for numbers to get bigger and stories. :colbert:

# ? Feb 17, 2018 23:19

WatermelonGun: May 7, 2009

Solice Kirsk posted:

If all I wanted out of a game was fun gameplay then I'd play Blades of Steel. RPGs are for numbers to get bigger and stories.

Perhaps read a book then. Some have lots of pages and that number gets bigger consistently

# ? Feb 17, 2018 23:22

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

WatermelonGun posted:

Perhaps read a book then. Some have lots of pages and that number gets bigger consistently

I know! I actually drunkenly tried to make that argument to my friends at a game night once. I don't think I convinced them.

# ? Feb 17, 2018 23:27

pr0p: Dec 8, 2011

Nanaki is a good kitty.

# ? Feb 17, 2018 23:30

Who What Now: Sep 10, 2006; by Azathoth

Wrong thread

# ? Feb 17, 2018 23:37

Smythe: Oct 12, 2003

Time_pants posted:

This guy loving nailed it. JRPG dialogue in general is pretty awful, but spoken aloud it's is basically an out-of-control firehose spraying a constant jet of ultra-concentrated liquid cringe at full blast, capable of instantly corroding whatever charitable sliver of respect that roommates, friends, parents, and significant others may have ever felt toward you withers and dies an excruciating, shameful death.

Thanks to the miracle of modern technology, what used to be a series of mercifully silent text boxes is now a seizure-inducing ritual of sitting perfectly still and praying for death as a cadre of teenagers dressed like a colorblind magician's sex dungeon shout and pose at each each other about the power of friendship. Finally, after decades of outdated flexibility of being able to skipping through cumbersome exposition, middle school-quality writing is brought to life through the shrill, tedious performances of memorable characters like: brooding hero, """"""comic"""""" relief, scantily-clad, ultra-sexualized love interest, and scantily-clad, ultra-sexualized, underaged love interest.

Thanks to the tireless efforts of Japanese developers, these miserable conveniences have been completely modernized and updated to deliver fully-voiced, high-definition cutscenes that induce overwhelming dread and innovative, streamlined feelings helplessness as control is periodically wrested from the player unannounced to subject them to a baffling assault on the very concept of human interaction. Seconds pass like hours as nobody can muster the courage to make eye contact or look directly at the screen or even move a muscle as everyone quietly fights to keep their own skeletons from bursting free from their anguished prison and fleeing in abject shame.

This is truly what the genre has been working towards all these years.

lol

# ? Feb 18, 2018 00:27

myDad: Jan 20, 2010; ce n'est pas ma m�re; College Slice

Time_pants posted:

This guy loving nailed it. JRPG dialogue in general is pretty awful, but spoken aloud it's is basically an out-of-control firehose spraying a constant jet of ultra-concentrated liquid cringe at full blast, capable of instantly corroding whatever charitable sliver of respect that roommates, friends, parents, and significant others may have ever felt toward you withers and dies an excruciating, shameful death.

Thanks to the miracle of modern technology, what used to be a series of mercifully silent text boxes is now a seizure-inducing ritual of sitting perfectly still and praying for death as a cadre of teenagers dressed like a colorblind magician's sex dungeon shout and pose at each each other about the power of friendship. Finally, after decades of outdated flexibility of being able to skipping through cumbersome exposition, middle school-quality writing is brought to life through the shrill, tedious performances of memorable characters like: brooding hero, """"""comic"""""" relief, scantily-clad, ultra-sexualized love interest, and scantily-clad, ultra-sexualized, underaged love interest.

Thanks to the tireless efforts of Japanese developers, these miserable conveniences have been completely modernized and updated to deliver fully-voiced, high-definition cutscenes that induce overwhelming dread and innovative, streamlined feelings helplessness as control is periodically wrested from the player unannounced to subject them to a baffling assault on the very concept of human interaction. Seconds pass like hours as nobody can muster the courage to make eye contact or look directly at the screen or even move a muscle as everyone quietly fights to keep their own skeletons from bursting free from their anguished prison and fleeing in abject shame.

This is truly what the genre has been working towards all these years.

# ? Feb 18, 2018 00:34

Zorodius: Feb 11, 2007; EA GAMES' MASTERPIECE 'MADDEN 2018 G.O.A.T. EDITION' IS A GLORIOUS TRIUMPH OF ART AND TECHNOLOGY. IT BRINGS GAMEDAY RIGHT TO THE PLAYER AND WHOEVER SAYS OTHERWISE CAN, YOU GUESSED IT...
SUCK THE SHIT STRAIGHT OUT OF MY OWN ASSHOLE.

BUY IT.

Remember how, in FF6, battle speed applies to enemies but not you, so the game is just harder on high speed?

It's still easy, but I like how hosed that is

# ? Feb 18, 2018 01:04

DONT THREAD ON ME: Oct 1, 2002; by Nyc_Tattoo; Floss Finder

Time_pants posted:

This guy loving nailed it. JRPG dialogue in general is pretty awful, but spoken aloud it's is basically an out-of-control firehose spraying a constant jet of ultra-concentrated liquid cringe at full blast, capable of instantly corroding whatever charitable sliver of respect that roommates, friends, parents, and significant others may have ever felt toward you withers and dies an excruciating, shameful death.

Thanks to the miracle of modern technology, what used to be a series of mercifully silent text boxes is now a seizure-inducing ritual of sitting perfectly still and praying for death as a cadre of teenagers dressed like a colorblind magician's sex dungeon shout and pose at each each other about the power of friendship. Finally, after decades of outdated flexibility of being able to skipping through cumbersome exposition, middle school-quality writing is brought to life through the shrill, tedious performances of memorable characters like: brooding hero, """"""comic"""""" relief, scantily-clad, ultra-sexualized love interest, and scantily-clad, ultra-sexualized, underaged love interest.

Thanks to the tireless efforts of Japanese developers, these miserable conveniences have been completely modernized and updated to deliver fully-voiced, high-definition cutscenes that induce overwhelming dread and innovative, streamlined feelings helplessness as control is periodically wrested from the player unannounced to subject them to a baffling assault on the very concept of human interaction. Seconds pass like hours as nobody can muster the courage to make eye contact or look directly at the screen or even move a muscle as everyone quietly fights to keep their own skeletons from bursting free from their anguished prison and fleeing in abject shame.

This is truly what the genre has been working towards all these years.

when ffx came out i was 13 or 14 and so embarrassed by the dialogue that i made my dad hook the tv up so that i could play with headphones.

i should have just not played at all because it was bad.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H47ow4_Cmk0

# ? Feb 18, 2018 01:24

DoubleCakes: Jan 14, 2015

wide stance posted:

Even amongst the elite troops of SOLDIER, Sephiroth is known to be the best. His past is locked away in a confidential file held at Shinra, Inc. His giant sword, which only he can handle, has extremely destructive power. Said to have disappeared in a battle years ago, his current whereabouts are unknown.

bad rear end

Also New Threat is good, y'all shoulkd try it

# ? Feb 18, 2018 02:59

bradzilla: Oct 15, 2004

MALE SHOEGAZE posted:

when ffx came out i was 13 or 14 and so embarrassed by the dialogue that i made my dad hook the tv up so that i could play with headphones.

i should have just not played at all because it was bad.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H47ow4_Cmk0

The sphere grid owned though

# ? Feb 18, 2018 03:11

Who What Now: Sep 10, 2006; by Azathoth

Tidas' laugh was intentionally bad, how does everyone miss that?

# ? Feb 18, 2018 03:15

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

Who What Now posted:

Tidas' laugh was intentionally bad, how does everyone miss that?

Because it's the scene itself that is terrible and not just the laugh. It did give us this though:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9cyx6nWdFas&t=25s

# ? Feb 18, 2018 03:19

WatermelonGun: May 7, 2009

Solice Kirsk posted:

Because it's the scene itself that is terrible and not just the laugh. It did give us this though:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9cyx6nWdFas&t=25s

You can derelict my balls if you expect me to click on anything related to that show.

I want xenogears readily available and part of the summer curriculum for every second grader

# ? Feb 18, 2018 03:43

Yvershek: Nov 15, 2000; and there are no
diamonds in the
mine

Interested in if they do anything about the way Barret talks. Even managed to get people attacking it back in the 90s. Guess a safe way to do things would be to make all the people in his shithole hometown speak the same.

# ? Feb 18, 2018 03:48

Wicker Man: Sep 5, 2007; Just like Columbus...; Clapping Larry

If you are gonna remaster something, do Xenogears. That game definitely deserved more attention.

# ? Feb 18, 2018 04:02

LinYutang: Oct 12, 2016; NEOLIBERAL SHITPOSTER

VOTE BLUE NO MATTER WHO!!!

bloom posted:

There's a pc remaster of XII now but the combat in that always looked terrible and it's 50 bucks so lol nope.

Ff12 was definitely the worst one

I don't think it even had a plot

# ? Feb 18, 2018 06:28

Scrotum Modem: Sep 12, 2014

if you wanna play ff7 in this day and age you use one with a keyboard mod - i assume that version on steam has that. there's also a mod for improved digital audio that's community-made to replace that old midi crap it came with. the other big one replaces the character models with the ones used in fighting that uses more polygons. no more cube hands and all that poo poo. a bunch of them are custom made. dunno what the other mods are these days. i probably last played it in 2006 or around then

i can't wait until the remake comes out as there's nothing more fun than playing a japanese rpg where the main character is a male eunuch with a giant sword

# ? Feb 18, 2018 06:40

Smythe: Oct 12, 2003

Joe Mama Poonana posted:

i can't wait until the remake comes out as there's nothing more fun than playing a japanese rpg where the main character is a male eunuch with a giant sword

but u can play with urself right now?? :grin:

# ? Feb 18, 2018 06:46

Pneub: Mar 12, 2007; I'M THE DEVIL, AND I WILL WASH OVER THE EARTH AND THE SEAS WILL RUN RED WITH THE BLOOD OF ALL THE SINNERS

I AM REBORN

Joe Mama Poonana posted:

the other big one replaces the character models with the ones used in fighting that uses more polygons. no more cube hands and all that poo poo. a bunch of them are custom made.

But they didn't replace the running animations so they al look goofy as poo poo. Barret runs like a marionette that just poo poo it's pants.

# ? Feb 18, 2018 07:22

goethe.cx: Apr 23, 2014

Wicker Man posted:

If you are gonna remaster something, do Xenogears. That game definitely deserved more attention.

that game was some weird poo poo. i would love to see a remaster with the parts that got cut

# ? Feb 18, 2018 07:54

Mr.Pibbleton: Feb 3, 2006; Aleuts rock, chummer.

They should use the fighting system from Grandia 2, that was really good, but they're more likely to focus on DLC like Tidus skins/voice packs!

# ? Feb 18, 2018 08:00

Nefarious 2.0: Apr 22, 2008; Offense is overrated anyway.

Time_pants posted:

This guy loving nailed it. JRPG dialogue in general is pretty awful, but spoken aloud it's is basically an out-of-control firehose spraying a constant jet of ultra-concentrated liquid cringe at full blast, capable of instantly corroding whatever charitable sliver of respect that roommates, friends, parents, and significant others may have ever felt toward you withers and dies an excruciating, shameful death.

Thanks to the miracle of modern technology, what used to be a series of mercifully silent text boxes is now a seizure-inducing ritual of sitting perfectly still and praying for death as a cadre of teenagers dressed like a colorblind magician's sex dungeon shout and pose at each each other about the power of friendship. Finally, after decades of outdated flexibility of being able to skipping through cumbersome exposition, middle school-quality writing is brought to life through the shrill, tedious performances of memorable characters like: brooding hero, """"""comic"""""" relief, scantily-clad, ultra-sexualized love interest, and scantily-clad, ultra-sexualized, underaged love interest.

Thanks to the tireless efforts of Japanese developers, these miserable conveniences have been completely modernized and updated to deliver fully-voiced, high-definition cutscenes that induce overwhelming dread and innovative, streamlined feelings helplessness as control is periodically wrested from the player unannounced to subject them to a baffling assault on the very concept of human interaction. Seconds pass like hours as nobody can muster the courage to make eye contact or look directly at the screen or even move a muscle as everyone quietly fights to keep their own skeletons from bursting free from their anguished prison and fleeing in abject shame.

This is truly what the genre has been working towards all these years.

i usually dislike tryhard posts but i gotta admit this one is p. drat good

# ? Feb 18, 2018 08:28

Creed Reunion Tour: Jul 3, 2007; by Cyrano4747; Grimey Drawer

Nefarious 2.0 posted:

i usually dislike tryhard posts but i gotta admit this one is p. drat good

why are you intimidated by effort?

# ? Feb 18, 2018 14:19

SPACE HOMOS: Jan 12, 2005

Its been in box in the garage for so long, I am not sure the disc work. They get warped in the heat.

I kind of wish I still had a cd drive, I am curious if you can tell the midi playback to go through my roland sc-55. Although I think the music was composed on a Yamaha XG device.

The PS1 version was midi but through the Playstation's SPU which supported midi sequencing.

SPACE HOMOS fucked around with this message at 15:21 on Feb 18, 2018

# ? Feb 18, 2018 15:16

scott zoloft: Dec 7, 2015; yeah same

SPACE HOMOS posted:

Its been in box in the garage for so long, I am not sure the disc work. They get warped in the heat.

I kind of wish I still had a cd drive, I am curious if you can tell the midi playback to go through my roland sc-55. Although I think the music was composed on a Yamaha XG device.

The PS1 version was midi but through the Playstation's SPU which supported midi sequencing.

I'm sure you could if you had the correct ports and hardware. Your Roland should detect as an audio device that you can tell windows to output sound to. I'd bet even if you're using Windows 10, there's a driver and a guide somewhere.

# ? Feb 18, 2018 15:23

pr0p: Dec 8, 2011

FF3/6 on the SNES was a good game. You kids and your playing stations! *angry fist*

# ? Feb 18, 2018 15:29

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# ? May 1, 2024 17:32

scott zoloft: Dec 7, 2015; yeah same

pr0p posted:

FF3/6 on the SNES was a good game. You kids and your playing stations! *angry fist*

it was only made better on the pray station, man.

outside the absurd loadtimes between screens cause you were loading from disc anyway.

# ? Feb 18, 2018 15:35

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