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Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts
Now that's burgin'

New page means I have to ask the obligatory 'once-a-page-question': Can someone please post a link to a good smash burg tool? I can't read 3 pages of 1 thread ain't nobody got time for that.

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Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts

Ranter posted:

Now that's burgin'

New page means I have to ask the obligatory 'once-a-page-question': Can someone please post a link to a good smash burg tool? I can't read 3 pages of 1 thread ain't nobody got time for that.

Here fuckwit: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003AQAYKC/

Ultimate Mango
Jan 18, 2005

Ranter posted:

Now that's burgin'

New page means I have to ask the obligatory 'once-a-page-question': Can someone please post a link to a good smash burg tool? I can't read 3 pages of 1 thread ain't nobody got time for that.

Masonry trowel and wallpaper scraper. Whatever is respectively beefy and sharp (and cheap) from your local hardware store.

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

This is proof of two things.

1] There is a God and they love us.
2] You need to live closer to me and invite me over more.

Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts

Ultimate Mango posted:

Masonry trowel and wallpaper scraper. Whatever is respectively beefy and sharp (and cheap) from your local hardware store.

I prefer this pants presser https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B004JJRR0E/ and this beveled mirror https://www.amazon.com/Scalloped-Rectangular-Rectangle-Horizontal-Frameless/dp/B07621VFGN/ for smashing and scraping respectively.

Elephanthead
Sep 11, 2008


Toilet Rascal
I don't see how you can cook a burger without this. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B071H7HQJK/ref=sspa_dk_detail_1?psc=1&pd_rd_i=B071H7HQJK&pd_rd_wg=IhdmA&pd_rd_r=JZTP0JYRK9R56ZXXQS83&pd_rd_w=lzo6q

Ultimate Mango
Jan 18, 2005



The difference between us is I was actually being serious. I have a great Milwaukee trowel that has a nicely welded and very stable handle. It’s thick and smashes oh so nice. The scraper is just a scraper, Kenji was spot on about that as a tool for smash burg scraping.

Jewel Repetition
Dec 24, 2012

Ask me about Briar Rose and Chicken Chaser.
Finally got my flatburgers to crust up. Turns out I just needed to let them cook longer.

Gwaihir
Dec 8, 2009
Hair Elf
It's burg night friends.

Assemble your implements of burgstruction:



smash vigorously





Topped with a single slice of cheese, shake shack style sauce, and a couple of pickles. With the little two ounce patties, even two normal slices of cheese is too much.

Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts
:bisonyes:

Flash Gordon Ramsay
Sep 28, 2004

Grimey Drawer

Gwaihir posted:

It's burg night friends.

Assemble your implements of burgstruction:



smash vigorously





Topped with a single slice of cheese, shake shack style sauce, and a couple of pickles. With the little two ounce patties, even two normal slices of cheese is too much.



A righteous burg

Jamsta
Dec 16, 2006

Oh you want some too? Fuck you!


Dis

Flash Gordon Ramsay
Sep 28, 2004

Grimey Drawer
Although I think standard smashburg protocol requires you to put the plain burg on top of the one with cheese so it's sandwiched between the two patties and gets even meltier

Dacap
Jul 8, 2008

I've been involved in a number of cults, both as a leader and a follower.

You have more fun as a follower. But you make more money as a leader.



Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:

Although I think standard smashburg protocol requires you to put the plain burg on top of the one with cheese so it's sandwiched between the two patties and gets even meltier

There should be a 1:1 cheese to patty ratio IMO.

The Midniter
Jul 9, 2001

Dacap posted:

There should be a 1:1 cheese to patty ratio IMO.

Totally depends on the size of the patty. Grillburgs? Sure, 1:1 absolutely. Thin smashburgs? I feel like one piece of cheese would be perfectly fine for two patties.

Gwaihir
Dec 8, 2009
Hair Elf

Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:

Although I think standard smashburg protocol requires you to put the plain burg on top of the one with cheese so it's sandwiched between the two patties and gets even meltier

Yea that was a mistake, but once you place the cheese in one spot there's not really any going back heh.


I made a second one a few hours later (I skipped lunch, ok...) and did it double double style mustard grilled w/ 2 slices of cheese. Two was a bit overboard really, at least for me.

Ultimate Mango
Jan 18, 2005

I am a fatass and order three by threes at in-n-out. Two meat and two cheese, even thin smash patties is fine.



Oh god I’m so fat and I can’t stop. Double doubles are fine and then I’m there in the drive through and I order the same thing I’ve been ordering for 20 years.

butros
Aug 2, 2007

I believe the signs of the reptile master


Jamsta
Dec 16, 2006

Oh you want some too? Fuck you!


sweet tater erections. noice

Bob Morales
Aug 18, 2006


Just wear the fucking mask, Bob

I don't care how many people I probably infected with COVID-19 while refusing to wear a mask, my comfort is far more important than the health and safety of everyone around me!

The Midniter posted:

Totally depends on the size of the patty. Grillburgs? Sure, 1:1 absolutely. Thin smashburgs? I feel like one piece of cheese would be perfectly fine for two patties.

Solution: Thin sliced cheese

Control Volume
Dec 31, 2008

Found a local butcher that sells ground beef that costs the same as the kroger crap but with the benefit of having significantly better quality. I forgot to toast the bun and didn't have half the toppings but it was still one of the best burgers Ive made.

Jamsta
Dec 16, 2006

Oh you want some too? Fuck you!

Knocked up a smashburger for the first time in a while... chili cheese, sriracha and ketchup, fresh red onion.



Casu Marzu
Oct 20, 2008

nice sear bruh

Control Volume
Dec 31, 2008



well this is it, this is the best burger Ive ever made in my life

Bogart
Apr 12, 2010

by VideoGames
Where's the cheese my buddy

Moey
Oct 22, 2010

I LIKE TO MOVE IT

Bogart posted:

Where's the cheese my buddy

This.

Control Volume
Dec 31, 2008

I wont sully my burger with cheese

butros
Aug 2, 2007

I believe the signs of the reptile master


What

PT6A
Jan 5, 2006

Public school teachers are callous dictators who won't lift a finger to stop children from peeing in my plane

Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts
The only acceptable reason for no cheese on a burger is lactose intolerance, and even then you should just do it and then spray liquid poo poo all over the place because it's worth it.

Gwaihir
Dec 8, 2009
Hair Elf
No cheese can be fine, just gotta rely on a great meat blend!

Bogart
Apr 12, 2010

by VideoGames
I'm lactose intolerant and I take Lactaids so I don't have to be without cheese. Your burg looks good, but without cheese, it is a sorry thing indeed.

iajanus
Aug 17, 2004

NUMBER 1 QUEENSLAND SUPPORTER
MAROONS 2023 STATE OF ORIGIN CHAMPIONS FOR LIFE



Burger for a lazy Sunday

kloa
Feb 14, 2007


Control Volume posted:



well this is it, this is the best burger Ive ever made in my life

But it’s not smashed :confused:

Brawnfire
Jul 13, 2004

🎧Listen to Cylindricule!🎵
https://linktr.ee/Cylindricule

That's quite a vertical burger

VERTiG0
Jul 11, 2001

go move over bro
I made burgs on Friday night with 75/25, half pound patty each, and used 1tbsp of black bean & garlic sauce per pound mixed in with the beef before I formed the patties.

Is this heresy? It was so good. I then grilled them in my good ol' Weber Performer charcoal grill.

Arglebargle III
Feb 21, 2006

iajanus posted:

Got a BBC at Getta burger. From their description - "Double beef patty, double cheese, bacon, fried mozzarella sticks, cream cheese, pickles, white onion and “That BBQ Sauce”."



Genuinely disgusting

Flash Gordon Ramsay
Sep 28, 2004

Grimey Drawer

Arglebargle III posted:

Genuinely disgusting

Agreed. I'd probably only eat one.

Arglebargle III
Feb 21, 2006

I would not be surprised if the milk fat in that burger added up to a stick of butter

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GnarlyCharlie4u
Sep 23, 2007

I have an unhealthy obsession with motorcycles.

Proof

Ranter posted:

The only acceptable reason for no cheese on a burger is lactose intolerance, and even then you should just do it and then spray liquid poo poo all over the place because it's worth it.

Kosher burgs are a thing.

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