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I don't know if were still debating the characters, but I think it would be interesting if instead of Daito/Shoto either both being Japanese or both being anime fans who get really in character, why not split the difference? Maybe Shoto could be a foreign fan of Japanese descent who wants to get back to his roots? So he could be, say, Japanese-Brazilian (since there's apparently an actual large Japanese-Brazilian minority & a large anime fandom in IRL Brazil), who got into Kurosawa, met Daito on the Oasis, and the rest is history. And I kind of like Hostile V's take on genderflipped Shoto: Hostile V posted:If you were gonna flip Shoto into Shoko, middle-aged/over-25 ex-salarywoman who sunk severance and funds into investments to retreat from Japanese society because she just can't take the stress and the hosed-up societal expectations anymore. Someone who was held to the metaphorical grindstone and was worn down and nearly broken and being the sidekick to Daito is how she's getting her life back in order and healing from it. Less "Wade becoming a super cool internet man" and more "I'm building a cocoon for myself until I can emerge healed". And I think you could actually fit her into the narrative without having to replace Shoto (whatever final form he takes in the narrative) by having her employer/previous employer be IOI and have her be Daito's older sister. So maybe she's not interested in the Hunt & isn't a Sixer, but when her brother dies, she puts two and two together and manages to get in touch with Shoto/the rest of the remaining high five and offers them a back door - replacing the anonymous 'disaffected sysadmin' from the original story. Also, I think perhaps for the final battle they put the word out to encourage people to use original, user-created content, since the Sixers have presumably a vast library of official/licensed properties so they know exactly what to expect, but if some enterprising individuals create their own characters & content then they've got nothing. Plus it has a thematic element of creating new things vs. recycling the old.
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Apr 11, 2018 19:32
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Honestly, not looking forward to Westerners writing about how bad Japan is, unlike their progressive and open-minded society ( why "over-25"?).
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Apr 11, 2018 19:35
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Samizdata posted:Joyce doesn't count. We were talking about narrative fiction. Or are you going to be another goalpost mover with an inability to actually read words in front of you? We're talking narrative fiction in a thread about a work of narrative fiction. We are not rearchitecting the whole of literature. narrative fiction is a pointless term you made up yourself. all fiction is narrative
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Apr 11, 2018 19:49
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Quit arguing about what counts as fiction, assholes.Dave Syndrome posted:I've had this idea of presenting Anorak's invitation as an in-world document, but I'm not sure if this version doesn't make it harder to read than the original. Maybe someone has a better idea for formatting the thing, the footnotes might work in a novel but not on the screen. Pay no attention to my prose, I'm not a writer, it's just intended as a placeholder. It's an interesting idea, but it feels like it would conflict with making the first chapter about Wade. Does anyone have thoughts on that?
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Apr 11, 2018 19:53
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Chapter: ---- (fit this into the timeline when appropriate) Art3mis and I moved to the center of the dance floor. Soon we were surrounded by onlookers, each of them diverted from their own pleasures by the the site of us under the red glow of the spotlight. Her fingers gracefully skimmed the warm and loose flesh of my testes as they reached towards my oiled rear end in a top hat. Her hand gently breached the crevice of my lower buttocks, and slowly her finger wormed its way into the clutched muscle of my anus. She breached it, and slowly sought out my prostate. At the same time I explored her quim with my hand. My middle and ring finger pried apart the twitching hole of her vagina while my thumb found its way through the ring of her clitoral piercing. Each time I explored deeper into her wet hole, I tugged hard upon the ring. I wanted to train her to find no difference between pleasure and pain. We circled upon a dance floor slick with the congealed mix of jism and vaginal excretions. Our motions in each other's bodies were as much to the rhythm of the music as to the slapping beat of the loving all around us. She grew closer to climax, and I was infatuated with the sense of power. My control over her pleasure felt as powerful as control over life and death itself. She was a babe in my hands, wholly at the mercy of my whims. I looked her in the eyes and told her simply, "I love you." She was surprised both by my revelation and by the sudden insertion of my cock inside her. "You don't mean that," she said. "I do," I said. "You don't even know if I am really a woman. What if I am secretly a big hairy guy?" "What is gender? Would I refuse a symphony because it was played on a different instrument? Every body has pleasure to be gained from it. All flesh can be enjoyed equally." "What if I am fat." "Then I would gently caress each of your folds" "What if..." I placed my hand around her throat. I knew she had a vr suit powerful enough to transfer the sensation of strangulation. I knew she was out there, somewhere, struggling for breath at my hand. If I wanted, I could hold her in my hand until she passed out. Such was the ecstasy of my ownership of her at that moment. "Listen," I told her, "It doesn't matter what you are in the real world. I love you just the same. Even if you were a single smooth lump of skin without a single orifice, I would gut you just to told my pleasure from your warm innards." "You would kill me, then?" she said. "Of course. There is no value in preserving beauty. Precious things are only so because they are brief. A flower that lasts forever is no lovelier than a stone. You are beautiful Art3mis, so I would do you the honor of destroying you. So that you would be beautiful forever. Because that is my love for you." "You do not love me," Art3mis said, "You speak only of my body" "Are you so foolish to think you are anything but? You are but flesh. Not soul, not mind, only body. Just like the rest of us." It was at this affirmation that I felt her first climax.
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Apr 11, 2018 19:57
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In the same way it was Cline's dream for Spielberg to make the movie, I hope to have a movie of my version done by Pier Paolo Pasolini
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Apr 11, 2018 19:59
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Mel Mudkiper posted:Chapter: ---- (fit this into the timeline when appropriate) 
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Apr 11, 2018 20:05
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Mel Mudkiper posted:Art3mis and I moved to the center of the dance floor. Soon we were surrounded by onlookers, each of them diverted from their own pleasures by the the site of us under the red glow of the spotlight. Her fingers gracefully skimmed the warm and loose flesh of my testes as they reached towards my oiled rear end in a top hat. Her hand gently breached the crevice of my lower buttocks, and slowly her finger wormed its way into the clutched muscle of my anus. She breached it, and slowly sought out my prostate. At the same time I explored her quim with my hand. My middle and ring finger pried apart the twitching hole of her vagina while my thumb found its way through the ring of her clitoral piercing. Each time I explored deeper into her wet hole, I tugged hard upon the ring. I wanted to train her to find no difference between pleasure and pain. Excellent. Caligula: Divine Carnage is giving me ideas about the kind of spectacles you might see in the fix fic. It's a fascinating book. Ancient Romans would mark the end of a gladiatorial battles by collectively ejaculating onto the arena. That would fit right in into this orificecracy.
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Apr 11, 2018 20:07
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BravestOfTheLamps posted:Excellent. My goal is to slowly draw the narrative focus away from the personal physical pleasure he feels and isntead towards the pleasure he takes from his sense of dominance as he progresses further in the quest. I hope for the book to lose all pretense of eroticism by two-thirds of the way through, as each act of sexual gratification becomes more wholly dispassionate. If the reader is not numbed to all levels of titillation by the end, then I will have considered the project and intellectual and artistic failure Mel Mudkiper fucked around with this message at 20:14 on Apr 11, 2018 |
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Apr 11, 2018 20:11
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chitoryu12 posted:Quit arguing about what counts as fiction, assholes. don't take their bourgie gatekeeper poo poo away, it's all they've got quote:It's an interesting idea, but it feels like it would conflict with making the first chapter about Wade. I was thinking, if you go the epistolary route, each in-world 'document' would come after a narrative chapter and give it context, by providing backstory or offer an alternative viewpoint to the events in it. (This would also be a bonus 80s reference, since it's the same structure as the classic 80s comic Watchmen which by the way Wade has read exactly 1,634 times and completed every quest on the planet Ozymandias). Dave Syndrome's post would then fit in after chapter 1 quite nicely. I especially like the footnotes and the gunter comments therein; I think they'd be effective done in the style of the print version of David Foster Wallace's piece "Host", laid out all over the page to demonstrate how gunters have turned everything into a borderline-meaningless hash of references on references:  Be a fuckton of work laying it out though Clipperton fucked around with this message at 20:17 on Apr 11, 2018 |
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Apr 11, 2018 20:15
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I feel like having the second challenge be performing the lead role in Salo would be too on the nose. Perhaps he has to participate in a Giallo film?
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Apr 11, 2018 20:17
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Samizdata posted:Joyce doesn't count. We were talking about narrative fiction. haha dude what
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Apr 11, 2018 20:20
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Clipperton posted:I was thinking, if you go the epistolary route, each in-world 'document' would come after a narrative chapter and give it context, by providing backstory or offer an alternative viewpoint to the events in it. (This would also be a bonus 80s reference, since it's the same structure as the classic 80s comic Watchmen which by the way Wade has read exactly 1,634 times and completed every quest on the planet Ozymandias). That might be a way to work it. The first chapter is still about Wade, with just the minimal info about Halliday's contest to establish what Wade thinks about it before he stumbles upon it later. Then there's a separate "chapter" with the full analyzed layout of Anorak's Invitation and comments from people on it.
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Apr 11, 2018 20:34
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chitoryu12 posted:That might be a way to work it. The first chapter is still about Wade, with just the minimal info about Halliday's contest to establish what Wade thinks about it before he stumbles upon it later. Then there's a separate "chapter" with the full analyzed layout of Anorak's Invitation and comments from people on it. A full transcript of the Invitation with detailed annotations would be way too much work imo: you could do chapter 1 as-is, taking us through the Invitation, then the document afterwards is just a single page or even paragraph of transcript, like Dave Syndrome did, with a bunch of insane gunter annotations and slapfights. That'll give the idea that the full, annotated Invitation is Henry Darger-level gargantuan without having to do the whole thing.
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Apr 11, 2018 20:40
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It already feels like you guys are going the way of all goon projects in that you all want to contribute ideas but none of you seem to be willing to actually do the work I mean hell my psuedo-intellectual psycho-sexual parody has more progress than this entire thread complain all you want about people taking the piss out of the project but go have a project already
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Apr 11, 2018 20:44
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Mel Mudkiper posted:It already feels like you guys are going the way of all goon projects in that you all want to contribute ideas but none of you seem to be willing to actually do the work It's been like one day since we started actually working on the prose.
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Apr 11, 2018 20:48
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chitoryu12 posted:It's been like one day since we started actually working on the prose. And in that one day you have spent more time arguing how to insert footnotes into a theoretical first chapter than you put into having a first chapter
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Apr 11, 2018 20:50
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Mel Mudkiper posted:And in that one day you have spent more time arguing how to insert footnotes into a theoretical first chapter than you put into having a first chapter Actually it's been more like 4 posts about a particular idea someone had and 50 posts from three people behaving like assholes.
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Apr 11, 2018 21:25
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Samizdata posted:Joyce doesn't count. We were talking about narrative fiction. this is definitely a person who reads books
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Apr 11, 2018 21:32
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hey I have an idea for a thread, this “finnegans wake” is just full of gibberish and weird language. let’s fix it by making it real english and create some plot and relatable characters. you know, narrative fiction
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Apr 11, 2018 21:54
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I apologize for the delay in responding to the reports made about this thread, it took a while to process things.
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Apr 11, 2018 22:29
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Hieronymous Alloy posted:I apologize for the delay in responding to the reports made about this thread, it took a while to process things. I find it a little insincere that a thread dedicated to mocking and picking apart a terrible book suddenly gets upset when people mock their terrible book What protects them against people pointing out how bad the idea is when the original inspiration for the project was pointing out bad an idea was?
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Apr 11, 2018 23:32
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Free BotL What kind of little bitch reports posts, anyway e: also: quote:You've managed to generate more reports in five days, one of which you spent on probation, than the rest of the entire subforum has generated in the past several months. Hieronymous, you've posted before about how much you hate dealing with reports, but "a bunch of people reported you" should not be a reason to probe someone, imo. BotL pisses of a lot of nerds and thus generates a lot of reports, but his posts are good, thoughtful, well-read, and interesting, which is more than can be said for the vast majority of us weirdos who post in this subforum chernobyl kinsman fucked around with this message at 23:44 on Apr 11, 2018 |
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Apr 11, 2018 23:35
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Mel Mudkiper posted:I find it a little insincere that a thread dedicated to mocking and picking apart a terrible book suddenly gets upset when people mock their terrible book Nobody's even gotten to write more than a small handful of text in the 24 hours since it's been open to work. People just started making GBS threads up the thread because they didn't like the idea of how we were going about it, or thought it was lame. If the writing people actually submit seriously is crap, go ahead and explain why it's crap.
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Apr 11, 2018 23:41
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I think the world of Ready Player One should be based on crypto-fascist post-war Central European literature instead of video games. Would this be too large a change?
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Apr 11, 2018 23:42
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 at lecturing everyone itt on the importance of style while loving up their own posts enough to get probedAnd for content: I was thinking about documents to include after each chapter, here's the sort of thing I had in mind: 2: Child Protective Services report on Wade's background and domestic situation (eliminates need for backstory in the chapter itself, and shows us how welfare agencies work in OASIS World) 3: One of Wade's school reports (could mention Wade's computer and guitar skills here so Wade doesn't need to brag about them in first person) 4: Arty's Missive blog post ofc 5: [Oasis Studies class] "Forbes" article on Halliday laying out his bizarre and temperamental management style I would be happy to take a crack at one or more of these; I think it'd make sense to wait until chitoryu12 has a draft of the relevant chapter, to see how best the document could play off it.
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Apr 11, 2018 23:53
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Mel Mudkiper posted:I find it a little insincere that a thread dedicated to mocking and picking apart a terrible book suddenly gets upset when people mock their terrible book the problem is there's basically no point to that discussion, it just turns the thread into a slapfight. 1st: "let's do project!" 2nd " ur dumb, also project is dumb" 1st: "your opinion is noted and will be ignored, moving on to the project. . . " 2nd: "NO PAY ATTENTION TO ME YOUR PROJECT IS BAD, I DEMAND YOU FEEL BAD" When it comes to this kind of slapfight I'm going to err on the side of people who are trying to be constructive and to create something. Also note that the specific posts I've dinged people for have been, specifically, low-effort empty stupid slander badposts that didn't even make semantic sense. The ONANSIS stuff was at least mildly amusing, but "how about not writing fanfiction" is just empty threadshitting to no purpose, and claiming that the writing of fanfiction is somehow "morally bankrupt" is taking internet self-righteousness to a ludicrous extreme. edit: in the interest of not making GBS threads up this thread further I'm going to ask that this particular line of discussion be taken somewhere else if people want to continue it -- QQCS might be appropriate. Hieronymous Alloy fucked around with this message at 00:00 on Apr 12, 2018 |
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Apr 11, 2018 23:54
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I don't know why you seized on the "morally bankrupt" bit because it was very obviously a joke like in a post which was itself a joke
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Apr 11, 2018 23:57
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Clipperton posted:
I like these, especially #5.
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Apr 12, 2018 00:01
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Hieronymous Alloy posted:the problem is there's basically no point to that discussion, it just turns the thread into a slapfight. A. gently caress you, ONANSIS was more than mildly amusing and is, currently, the only actual written content in the thread. The ONANSIS is art.  B. I don't think he was calling all fan-fiction morally bankrupt as much as the fact a bunch of people were hating a book so much they take it upon themselves to improve it in their own eyes as being morally bankrupt. I would not go so far as to say that, but its certainly a ugly sort of vanity to have such a project. C. BotL is a pompous rear end in a top hat but his criticisms were pretty meaningful. Deciding the gender of a character by vote while still having no clear vision of tone or prose IS putting the cart before the horse. If you want to say he's an rear end in a top hat, that's fair. However, his points were not empty. That's half the reason we found them amusing. He had a POINT that people refused to engage with. D. Creative Convention is for creating writing, Book Barn is for talking about writing. Technically, BotL was more on topic than they are  EDIT: Missed your edit, I have said my piece. Posts in this thread from here on out will be exclusively related to further exploration of the ONANSIS
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Apr 12, 2018 00:05
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My random suggestion: Can the Sixers please be called Fivers instead? A six digit ID, all of which start with 6, is actually a 5 digit ID. Also IOI interpreted as binary would be 1012 = 5, which is the sort of simple programming pun that nerds in the Every time it came up in the lets read it bugged me as a missed opportunity, but I'm guessing Ernest Cline just didn't see it because he doesn't actually seem to know very much about computers. PittTheElder fucked around with this message at 00:24 on Apr 12, 2018 |
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Apr 12, 2018 00:09
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Yes, it's like a lava lamp.
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Clipperton posted:
Apropos of nothing the idea of TBB mod Hieronymous "Hank" Alloy probing people exclusively for breaking MLA standards would be pretty hilarious Anyway, keep up the good work everyone, from the dudes trying to rewrite a bad book to the ones making fun of those people, everyone is doing dynamite work in here
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Apr 12, 2018 00:38
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Guy A. Person posted:the ones making fun of those people we cant do that anymore we've been told to be nice
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Apr 12, 2018 00:50
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ulvir posted:hey I have an idea for a thread, this “finnegans wake” is just full of gibberish and weird language. let’s fix it by making it real english and create some plot and relatable characters. you know, narrative fiction well you see, it all started one fine evening when i was strolling through phoenix park minding my own business and a fellow with a pipe asked me for the time...
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Apr 12, 2018 02:03
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Instead of critiquing the effort, I hope Mudkiper and BotL just keep posting excerpts of their version of a rewrite. So we can see the actual rewrite and the absurd sexual carnival evolve side by side.
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Apr 12, 2018 03:27
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Ccs posted:Instead of critiquing the effort, I hope Mudkiper and BotL just keep posting excerpts of their version of a rewrite. So we can see the actual rewrite and the absurd sexual carnival evolve side by side. Wasn't that how Game of Bones happened? Does that mean they're going to jail afterward like the real GoB authors did?
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Apr 12, 2018 03:35
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Ready Player Bone
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Apr 12, 2018 04:57
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Samizdata posted:Joyce doesn't count. We were talking about narrative fiction. Or are you going to be another goalpost mover with an inability to actually read words in front of you? We're talking narrative fiction in a thread about a work of narrative fiction. We are not rearchitecting the whole of literature. You should read Dubliners. Not only because it's fantastic, but because the techniques he uses to show the nuances of life in early-20th century Ireland could actually be useful for creating a story in a world like the one this thread is attempting to portray. It's easier to understand a setting and, yes, identify with characters, when there's a sense of tangible detail, especially if it's a setting less immediately imaginable than 1900s Dublin.
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Apr 12, 2018 05:32
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ulvir posted:narrative fiction is a pointless term you made up yourself. all fiction is narrative Oh, really? Tell me more, oh wise sage. (https://www.google.com/search?q=narrative+fiction&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&client=firefox-b-1)
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Apr 12, 2018 05:46
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chitoryu12 posted:Quit arguing about what counts as fiction, assholes. I don't see that happening. Open with it as a prologue or introduction. Use further EggWiki entries as interchapter transitions.
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Apr 12, 2018 05:48
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