UFC July - Dad Bod vs. The Cleveland Clod - The Something Awful Forums

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Bundt Cake: Aug 17, 2003; ;(

mewse posted:

He's jacked. He's a white boy and he's jacked. Deal with it.

we've all done it....

# ? Jul 11, 2018 04:29

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# ? Apr 25, 2024 00:51

Mean Bean Machine: May 9, 2008; Only when I breathe.

Shadow225 posted:

Buddy of mine said this and I kind of agree: this is a fight that Bork could win.

I don't think that any fighter is capable of taking his first shot. Even Cain couldn't take it. If he takes Cormier down, I don't think that Cormier will have the cardio to get up immediately. Now what happens after the first shot probably favors Cormier, but it depends on how much damage he takes in the interim.

Then again, I thought that there was no way that Stipe was going to lose soooo

brock is going to get absolutely wrecked by cormier

# ? Jul 11, 2018 04:29

Collapsing Farts: Jun 29, 2018; ð

Gay Horney posted:

I've literally seen those secondary titty muscles halfway up his tiddey like that. What is that line. What's going on

they're called "muscles" mate

# ? Jul 11, 2018 06:47

Orange Carlisle: Jul 14, 2007

How do secondary titty muscles effect sexual market value and/or posture

# ? Jul 11, 2018 07:07

Gay Horney: Feb 10, 2013; by Reene

Collapsing Farts posted:

they're called "muscles" mate

I've seen muscles but this is like his pecs have a belt

# ? Jul 11, 2018 07:24

TheRationalRedditor: Jul 17, 2000; WHO ABUSED HIM. WHO ABUSED THE BOY.

Gay Horney posted:

I've literally seen those secondary titty muscles halfway up his tiddey like that. What is that line. What's going on

those are the trapezius minora. the seams cleanly open upon flexion, and delicious mexican-pressed sugar candy tablets fall out

# ? Jul 11, 2018 07:55

Untrustable: Mar 17, 2009

Mean Bean Machine posted:

brock is going to get absolutely wrecked by cormier

I compared Brock's wrestling accolades with DC's. DC is the more decorated wrestler and has a record of 23-1-1 compared to Brock's 5-3-1. MMAth.

Brock wins via TKO by laying his giant body on DC and hammerfisting him until the referee waves it off.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 08:19

Collapsing Farts: Jun 29, 2018; ð

Brock will defeat Cormier via kamehameha

# ? Jul 11, 2018 08:37

Lone Goat: Apr 16, 2003; When life gives you lemons, suplex those lemons.

Mel Mudkiper posted:

Wellness policies Brock has failed in UFC: 1
Wellness policies Brock had failed in WWE: 0

scoreboard bitch

lol this dipshit thinks part timer Brock Lesnar is subject to the wellness policy lmao

# ? Jul 11, 2018 13:46

FishBowlRobot: Mar 21, 2006

Collapsing Farts posted:

Brock will defeat Cormier via kamehameha

Don�t be ridiculous.

His finishing move is the F5.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 14:13

Eat This Glob: Jan 14, 2008; God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. Who will wipe this blood off us? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we need to invent?

Bundt Cake posted:

we've all done it....

Lol

# ? Jul 11, 2018 14:22

Mr. Nice!: Oct 13, 2005; c-spam cannot afford

Lone Goat posted:

lol this dipshit thinks part timer Brock Lesnar is subject to the wellness policy lmao

He's also a connecticut employee like any of the rest they don't want to drug test so they're not legally allowed to test him.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 16:12

MotU: Mar 6, 2007; It was like she was evicting walking garbage.; Pillbug

Mr. Nice! posted:

He's also a connecticut employee like any of the rest they don't want to drug test so they're not legally allowed to test him.

no one that wrestles in WWE is an employee

# ? Jul 11, 2018 16:17

Shadow225: Jan 2, 2007

I stand corrected on no one being able to stuff Brock's first shot.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 16:32

Orange Carlisle: Jul 14, 2007

Lone Goat posted:

lol this dipshit thinks part timer Brock Lesnar is subject to the wellness policy lmao

# ? Jul 11, 2018 16:34

JaySB: Nov 16, 2006

MotU posted:

no one that wrestles in WWE is an employee

The superstars are

# ? Jul 11, 2018 17:02

Mel Mudkiper: Jan 19, 2012; At this point, Mudman abruptly ends the conversation. He usually insists on the last word.

Mr. Carlisle posted:

its genuinely impressive how obvious a joke can be and people will still not get it

# ? Jul 11, 2018 17:51

Skip My Posts: Aug 15, 2005; by FactsAreUseless

try making them funny and people might get it

# ? Jul 11, 2018 18:09

Lone Goat: Apr 16, 2003; When life gives you lemons, suplex those lemons.

Mel Mudkiper posted:

its genuinely impressive how obvious a joke can be and people will still not get it

most of your other posts are very stupid and bad so I just thought you were playing to your strengths

# ? Jul 11, 2018 18:30

Mel Mudkiper: Jan 19, 2012; At this point, Mudman abruptly ends the conversation. He usually insists on the last word.

a bunch of dudes who were super sensitive about a throwaway joke about Brock Lesnar's legs are the ones who think they are the arbiters of whats funny

k

# ? Jul 11, 2018 18:37

Lid: Feb 18, 2005; And the mercy seat is awaiting,
And I think my head is burning,
And in a way I'm yearning,
To be done with all this measuring of proof.
An eye for an eye
And a tooth for a tooth,
And anyway I told the truth,
And I'm not afraid to die.

Mel Mudkiper posted:

a bunch of dudes who were super sensitive about a throwaway joke about Brock Lesnar's legs are the ones who think they are the arbiters of whats funny

k

# ? Jul 11, 2018 18:45

I am Otis: Sep 22, 2003

Mel Mudkiper posted:

a bunch of dudes who were super sensitive about a throwaway joke about Brock Lesnar's legs are the ones who think they are the arbiters of whats funny

k

# ? Jul 11, 2018 18:55

willie_dee: Jun 21, 2010; I obtain sexual gratification from observing people being inflicted with violent head injuries

Mel Mudkiper posted:

a bunch of dudes who were super sensitive about a throwaway joke about Brock Lesnar's legs are the ones who think they are the arbiters of whats funny

k

Literally no one has thought you were funny. I get people in here calling me poo poo in equal amounts to people enjoying what I do, literally everyone has said you aren't funny. Take the hint, work on your posting.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 18:59

Bluedeanie: Jul 20, 2008; It's no longer a blue world, Max. Where could we go?

Not a good weak for the Croates it seems.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 20:23

CommonShore: Jun 6, 2014; A true renaissance man

So

Blagoy Ivanov is making his UFC debut against JDS this weekend. For those who don't know, Ivanov is a Bulgarian combat sambo fighter who beat Fedor in sambo about 6 months before Werdum did. He was then stabbed in the heart. Card looks meeeh overall. I'm curious as to how post-peptide Chad Mendes looks, and I'm interested in how Zingano-Renau plays out, but there's nothing on that one which will make me sad that I'm camping instead of watching it.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 20:26

Bluedeanie: Jul 20, 2008; It's no longer a blue world, Max. Where could we go?

Wish I was camping instead of probably watching that card.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 20:28

Shadow225: Jan 2, 2007

Mel Mudkiper posted:

a bunch of dudes who were super sensitive about a throwaway joke about Brock Lesnar's legs are the ones who think they are the arbiters of whats funny

k

You would probably have more success if you didn't Dunning Kruger your way into the thread having watched approximately 2.5 fights and talking definitively.
Please continue to think that you trolled the thread

# ? Jul 11, 2018 20:31

Bluedeanie: Jul 20, 2008; It's no longer a blue world, Max. Where could we go?

CommonShore when you are out in the woods, if you see a hut standing on Brock Lesnar legs you should run away and not pick any blue roses, that is the witch Baba Yaga's home and she is very territorial of her garden

# ? Jul 11, 2018 20:33

kimbo305: Jun 9, 2007; actually, yeah, I am a little mad

CommonShore posted:

Blagoy Ivanov is making his UFC debut against JDS this weekend. For those who don't know, Ivanov is a Bulgarian combat sambo fighter who beat Fedor in sambo about 6 months before Werdum did.

Not very excited for this one. His MMA fights have been lackluster.
If JDS still has a decent chunk of his game left, shouldn't be close. If he's really lost it, Ivanov can plod his way to a grinding decision, or worse, a TKO.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 20:34

Orange Carlisle: Jul 14, 2007

Fat dad becoming multiple weight class champ only kept us from killing each other for less than a week

Bring on the freak show fights at least then we're all laughing at the same poo poo

# ? Jul 11, 2018 20:35

CommonShore: Jun 6, 2014; A true renaissance man

Bluedeanie posted:

CommonShore when you are out in the woods, if you see a hut standing on Brock Lesnar legs you should run away and not pick any blue roses, that is the witch Baba Yaga's home and she is very territorial of her garden

Nonzero chance, as I'm camping in Saskatchewan. Thank you for the sage advice.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 20:44

Nierbo: Dec 5, 2010; sup brah?

CommonShore posted:

Nonzero chance, as I'm camping in Saskatchewan. Thank you for the sage advice.

Me too brother. Emma lake?

# ? Jul 11, 2018 21:17

Skip My Posts: Aug 15, 2005; by FactsAreUseless

Mel Mudkiper posted:

a bunch of dudes who were super sensitive about a throwaway joke about Brock Lesnar's legs are the ones who think they are the arbiters of whats funny

k

Lmao

# ? Jul 11, 2018 21:22

Kilometers Davis: Jul 9, 2007; They begin again

Covington really loves wearing his maga hat doesn�t he?

# ? Jul 11, 2018 21:22

Gay Horney: Feb 10, 2013; by Reene

Covington is growing on me even though I can't stand him or anything he stands for or does

# ? Jul 11, 2018 21:32

eric: Apr 27, 2004; Lipstick Apathy

Kilometers Davis posted:

Covington really loves wearing his maga hat doesn�t he?

Who doesn�t love a good maga hat? Woodley should be glad Covington is promoting the fight. A fight against RDA would have been a fight pass main event.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 21:54

Lone Goat: Apr 16, 2003; When life gives you lemons, suplex those lemons.

Bluedeanie posted:

CommonShore when you are out in the woods, if you see a hut standing on Brock Lesnar legs you should run away and not pick any blue roses, that is the witch Baba Yaga's home and she is very territorial of her garden

If you say "Hut of white, now sit tight" it'll leave you alone.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 22:28

Charles Gnarwin: Jul 31, 2014; I joined the #RXT REVOLUTION.

he knows...

eric posted:

Who doesn�t love a good maga hat? Woodley should be glad Covington is promoting the fight. A fight against RDA would have been a fight pass main event.

While I'm sure Tyron will gladly take the money that he may get from a fight with a guy who hasn't actually translated the Chael poo poo to extra buys, I'm also pretty sure that he isn't happy about the same guy being given a platform for racism.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 22:33

CommonShore: Jun 6, 2014; A true renaissance man

Nierbo posted:

Me too brother. Emma lake?

We're starting somewhere near Moose Jaw and then working our way north and east to visit the girlfriend's relatives who are scattered all over the province.

# ? Jul 11, 2018 23:08

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# ? Apr 25, 2024 00:51

Skip My Posts: Aug 15, 2005; by FactsAreUseless

Charles Gnarwin posted:

While I'm sure Tyron will gladly take the money that he may get from a fight with a guy who hasn't actually translated the Chael poo poo to extra buys, I'm also pretty sure that he isn't happy about the same guy being given a platform for racism.

lol

# ? Jul 11, 2018 23:25

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Hammer House: Stinger Splash Zone > UFC July - Dad Bod vs. The Cleveland Clod

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