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liberal tears.
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Jul 12, 2018 00:40
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Bong water. There always seems to be plenty of that lying around.
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Jul 12, 2018 00:41
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Spinal Fluid, i simply can't get enough of that poo poo. I had a hose like the ones from those beer helmets tapped into my spinal cord and now whenever I've got a serious thirst, I just take a long dram from my spine hose and I'm GOOD TO GO. Bonus, you get the tingly feeling in your brain and central nervous system whenever you take a pull from it. Double bonus, it's a closed system, the fluid comes from my body and then I ingest it and it goes back into my body so I literally never run out.
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Jul 12, 2018 00:47
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*Teeth - Once you run out of your own supply some humans will leave teeth under their pillows. Dentures are acceptable but not ideal. Entering a dentists office in the night will yield a mighty haul. *Computer chips - Has many minerals that mineral water just can't compete with. *Dippin' Dots - A little dangerous since its made of ground up alien bones.
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Jul 12, 2018 01:00
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Dimethylnitrosamine.
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Jul 12, 2018 01:03
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After all these shitposts, I thought I'd make a helpful one: Eggs. These delicious liquid treats have absolutely no water in them, just juicy egg. Make sure you drink them raw, eggs get really chunky if you cook them! Drink the eggs, Lowtax
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Jul 12, 2018 01:05
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Take a page out of the bees' book and sip nectar from flowers. When it's winter, time to hibernate or whatever bees do then.
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Jul 12, 2018 01:07
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The tears of various groups of ideologies and people seem to be popular these days
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Jul 12, 2018 01:46
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gleebster posted:Take a page out of the bees' book and sip nectar from flowers. When it's winter, time to hibernate or whatever bees do then. What the hell, why do bees do that, sounds dumb as gently caress to drink a flower.
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Jul 12, 2018 02:04
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Mercury of course. It's over 13 times as dense as water so you only need to drink a thirteenth as much!
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Jul 12, 2018 02:40
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Tea.
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Jul 12, 2018 02:41
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the river of slime from ghostbusters 2
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Jul 12, 2018 02:45
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OP, I really think what you should do is print out the entirety of the Something Awful Dot Com Internet Humor Forums, place the printed sheets into a blender (a juicer will also work), puree, then pour. I am happy to have helped you in this matter.
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Jul 12, 2018 02:45
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https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2545580
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Jul 12, 2018 03:15
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lol if you "drink" "liquids" and don't just absorb all the energy you need directly from the sun
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Jul 12, 2018 04:25
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Have you tried dihydrogen monoxide? I hear it's pretty good at hydrating you.
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Jul 12, 2018 04:30
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Whooping Crabs posted:Hydrogen peroxide. It's like water but contains more thirst-quenching oxygen! You joke, however I learned something when looking for high concentration hydrogen peroxide. https://www.amazon.com/One-Minute-C...n+peroxide+book Turns out people are crazy.
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Jul 12, 2018 04:43
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whatever the liquid in an lcd display is
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Jul 12, 2018 04:56
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Kak posted:the river of slime from nutted but she still suckin 2: still suckin'
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Jul 12, 2018 05:01
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1st- Country gravy (not too thick) - 2nd- brown gravy (not too thin)
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Jul 12, 2018 05:05
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I like to get a round pebble that's not too smooth and not to rough--it'll mess up you're mouth--and pop it under my tongue. You get some sweet sweet tongue fluids because your mouth is trying to digest the rock. If you give it a try be sure to boil the lil pebble before using it to make sure it's not unsanitary!!!
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Jul 12, 2018 05:39
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Welp turns out old honey buns is a retard after all. Caused a heat gain and ruptured my hot water tank. And all because he wanted to assert his dominance over the thoroughly vetted ex-kgb guy with the better solution to the problem that had a neutral reaction and made no heat. None of this is would have been a problem in the first place if people didn’t gently caress around and try to impose some godlike judgement on some stupid grunt on that should have been a clean out and not a week long problem for me. And, as it turns out, if anyone gets hurt fixing this thing old honey buns is gonna join the septic gruntman in holy matrimony until the flesh rots and no longer carries a load. ClamdestineBoyster fucked around with this message at 16:40 on Jul 13, 2018 |
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Jul 13, 2018 16:30
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ClamdestineBoyster posted:Welp turns out old honey buns is a retard after all. Caused a heat gain and ruptured my hot water tank. And all because he wanted to assert his dominance over the thoroughly vetted ex-kgb guy with the better solution to the problem that had a neutral reaction and made no heat. None of this is would have been a problem in the first place if people didn’t gently caress around and try to impose some godlike judgement on some stupid grunt on that should have been a clean out and not a week long problem for me. 
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Jul 13, 2018 16:42
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Just be like me and drink Eggs daily to make you cool and buff and all the ladies love me eventually...
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Jul 13, 2018 16:54
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I only drink sediment from the basin of Pompeii yeah it's mostly ancient corpse ash but it gets the job done
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Jul 13, 2018 16:57
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I drink febreeze juice for insanely refreshing farts
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Jul 13, 2018 16:59
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Whooping Crabs posted:Hydrogen peroxide. It's like water but contains more thirst-quenching oxygen! Learned something new today. 
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Jul 13, 2018 17:03
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last night i performed a scientific experiment to verify if substituting white wine in place of water leads to positive outcomes; after some very promising initial results there was a bit of an issue at the end, but rehydrating with more white wine the following day will surely mitigate such minor hiccups
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Jul 13, 2018 17:03
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Lowtax posted:What the hell, why do bees do that, sounds dumb as gently caress to drink a flower. Lol do you see bees dying of cancer or getting into fatal car accidents? Maybe it's not so dumb to drink a flower after all.
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Jul 13, 2018 17:04
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Oh hey look at me I’m mr macabre. The pleasure of someone’s suffering is totally worth all of these problems, just set it and forget it. I thought I could go 2, maybe 3 days without another person loving up in some way that results in yet another serious functional impairment in my life but no, we live in a monkey see monkey do world and everyone gets a piece of the action even if they gently caress up and don’t do it right and then more people gently caress up and make more problems and then more people have to fix those problems and in the end the correct solution was NOT TO gently caress WITH poo poo IN THE FIRST loving PLACE, EVER. If I have to go through this kind of poo poo one more time fools are just gonna drop, no questions. It’s literally like there’s an algorithm out there that makes people make the worst decisions they can possibly make in any circumstance.
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Jul 13, 2018 17:25
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ClamdestineBoyster posted:Oh hey look at me I’m mr macabre. The pleasure of someone’s suffering is totally worth all of these problems, just set it and forget it. I thought I could go 2, maybe 3 days without another person loving up in some way that results in yet another serious functional impairment in my life but no, we live in a monkey see monkey do world and everyone gets a piece of the action even if they gently caress up and don’t do it right and then more people gently caress up and make more problems and then more people have to fix those problems and in the end the correct solution was NOT TO gently caress WITH poo poo IN THE FIRST loving PLACE, EVER. If I have to go through this kind of poo poo one more time fools are just gonna drop, no questions. It’s literally like there’s an algorithm out there that makes people make the worst decisions they can possibly make in any circumstance. 
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Jul 13, 2018 17:29
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*pokes ClamdestineBoyster from behind and runs away*
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Jul 13, 2018 17:30
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Hey I’m not the rear end in a top hat who keeps letting all these kgb assholes into the bloods, but that organization has some serious integrity problems and the tests people usually apply to police are not effective for foreign intelligence. Better fix the gently caress up. People can be totally vetted and not on payroll for years and just pick up an intelligence contract, domestic or foreign, if they are hard up for cash or some kind of out from their lifestyle.
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Jul 13, 2018 17:46
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I drink those arizona fruit punches that come in the 24 oz cans. I think they're 0% water.
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Jul 13, 2018 17:51
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I hear there are planets and moons with liquid ammonia instead of water. Maybe that idk
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Jul 13, 2018 17:55
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tub girl
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Jul 13, 2018 18:36
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1gnoirents posted:I legitimately flirted with the idea of learning how to do this myself after a call to 911 once day when I was severely dehydrated (resting heart rate of 190). I took two full bags and it was like... quenching a thirst in places I've never felt before, places I didn't know could react that way. You know when you've been putting in some serious work outside for hours and hours and that one sip you take just takes you to another place for a second? It was like that except ... in all my cells... my organs... all my veins which before that day I didn't know you could feel. If you think that's good you should try heroin.
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Jul 13, 2018 18:42
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water that you would find in a ditch its still water, but its also so much more than that
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Jul 13, 2018 18:49
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Nothing like going through medical procedures where you’re making GBS threads out pulverized bone and necrotic intestine portions and not being able to take a shower or actually go out and eat or do anything. Hahahaha prank boys! 
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Jul 13, 2018 18:55
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drink water, heh, like a scrub? only the finest sugar water for me  
Tolkien minority fucked around with this message at 19:11 on Jul 13, 2018 |
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Jul 13, 2018 18:58
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