Best water alternatives?

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Best water alternatives?

«‹›4 »

Amateur Saboteur: Feb 5, 2010; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Tolkien minority posted:

drink water, heh, like a scrub? only the finest sugar water for me

Are you goddamn kidnapped? Do you need help?

# ? Jul 13, 2018 19:17

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 20, 2024 02:33

HugeGrossBurrito: Mar 20, 2018

Amateur Saboteur posted:

Are you goddamn kidnapped? Do you need help?

Lol right?

# ? Jul 13, 2018 19:20

pop fly to McGillicutty: Feb 2, 2004; A peckish little mouse!

eightysixed posted:

bleach is the obvious answer here.

Followed by an ammonia chaser.

# ? Jul 13, 2018 19:21

numberoneposter: Feb 19, 2014; How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

Tolkien minority posted:

drink water, heh, like a scrub? only the finest sugar water for me

anticipating the "after" where they bottles are all filled with pissssssssss

# ? Jul 13, 2018 20:12

ToxicSlurpee: Nov 5, 2003; -=SEND HELP=-; Pillbug

numberoneposter posted:

anticipating the "after" where they bottles are all filled with pissssssssss

Who says they aren't already?

# ? Jul 13, 2018 20:47

numberoneposter: Feb 19, 2014; How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

ToxicSlurpee posted:

Who says they aren't already?

nice username :thumbsup:

# ? Jul 13, 2018 20:48

The Real Amethyst: Apr 20, 2018; When no one was looking, Serval took forty Japari buns. She took 40 buns. That's as many as four tens. And that's terrible.

Literally no other drink can be created without water, idiots.
There are no better alternatives.

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:19

numberoneposter: Feb 19, 2014; How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

Fancy_Breakfast posted:

Literally no other drink can be created without water, idiots.
There are no better alternatives.

my bottle of orange juice says 100% juice dumb rear end

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:22

house of the dad: Jul 4, 2005

Soon they're going to start telling me that all sorts of poo poo is made out of water, like trees. Trees are made out of wood. If water was in so many things, why isn't it on the loving periodic table.

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:25

The Real Amethyst: Apr 20, 2018; When no one was looking, Serval took forty Japari buns. She took 40 buns. That's as many as four tens. And that's terrible.

numberoneposter posted:

my bottle of orange juice says 100% juice dumb rear end

Yeah but it only has water in it BECAUSE IT RAINED ON THE ORANGE JUICE TREE. moraon

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:33

Away all Goats: Jul 5, 2005; Goose's rebellion

Hot Tea. Just don't ruin it with sugar

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:35

HugeGrossBurrito: Mar 20, 2018

Ive been drinking the slime I clean out of the cat's water thing, ive lost a lot of weight I think its very healthy

# ? Jul 13, 2018 21:56

numberoneposter: Feb 19, 2014; How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

ive been drinking nothing but fermented cabbage smoothies

# ? Jul 13, 2018 22:06

Tolkien minority: Feb 14, 2012

Amateur Saboteur posted:

Are you goddamn kidnapped? Do you need help?

i stole it from reddit some guy made sugar water for himself to drink exclusivl every week beacuse he didnt like the taste of water

# ? Jul 13, 2018 23:17

ClamdestineBoyster: Aug 15, 2015; Can't post for 10 years!

numberoneposter posted:

my bottle of orange juice says 100% juice dumb rear end

what�s a �juice dumbass�?

# ? Jul 13, 2018 23:59

Amateur Saboteur: Feb 5, 2010; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Tolkien minority posted:

i stole it from reddit some guy made sugar water for himself to drink exclusivl every week beacuse he didnt like the taste of water

And what did he do when fall came and kindergarten started?

# ? Jul 14, 2018 00:45

Overnight Blaze: Mar 7, 2017

Lowtax have you considered dried milk? It's all the goodness of milk without any of that nasty water stuff in it

# ? Jul 14, 2018 01:00

Dang It Bhabhi!: May 27, 2004; ASK ME ABOUT
BEING
ESCULA GRIND'S
#1 SIMP

Wizzanthos posted:

Lowtax have you considered dried milk? It's all the goodness of milk without any of that nasty water stuff in it

Makes a great lube in a pinch.

# ? Jul 14, 2018 01:03

Lowtax: Nov 16, 1999; by Skyl3lazer

Fancy_Breakfast posted:

Yeah but it only has water in it BECAUSE IT RAINED ON THE ORANGE JUICE TREE. moraon

He's not saying to drink the tree, idiot. R > C > P. If the package says "100% orange juice" that means the only thing in there is orange juice, and an orange is full of orange and juice just means it was juiced, ergo quid pro quo there is no water in orange juice Dr. Scientist MD.

# ? Jul 14, 2018 01:06

Hell Yeah: Dec 25, 2012

Lowtax posted:

He's not saying to drink the tree, idiot. R > C > P. If the package says "100% orange juice" that means the only thing in there is orange juice, and an orange is full of orange and juice just means it was juiced, ergo quid pro quo there is no water in orange juice Dr. Scientist MD.

dr scientist md would never make such outrageous claims.

# ? Jul 14, 2018 01:14

Hell Yeah: Dec 25, 2012

dr scientist is a man of integrity, not some crackpot youtube doctor

# ? Jul 14, 2018 01:14

MageMage: Feb 11, 2007; I SUCK AND LOVE TO YELL PERFORMATIVE HOT TAKES AND NONSENSE LIES WHEN I GET WORKED UP. SOMETIMES AUTOBANNED IS BETTER. MAYBE ONE DAY WHEN I STORM OFF I'LL ACTUALLY STOP SHITTING UP THE SITE FOR REAL

1gnoirents posted:

I legitimately flirted with the idea of learning how to do this myself after a call to 911 once day when I was severely dehydrated (resting heart rate of 190). I took two full bags and it was like... quenching a thirst in places I've never felt before, places I didn't know could react that way. You know when you've been putting in some serious work outside for hours and hours and that one sip you take just takes you to another place for a second? It was like that except ... in all my cells... my organs... all my veins which before that day I didn't know you could feel.

Now I dont know if it was because of my degree of dehydration but I've been very close to giving it a try because it was incredible, so blissful, for something so bland.

In Arizona you can actually go to IV clinics for a drink.

# ? Jul 14, 2018 01:15

Lowtax: Nov 16, 1999; by Skyl3lazer

Hell Yeah posted:

dr scientist is a man of integrity, not some crackpot youtube doctor

I'll wait for his publicist to make an official press release instead of listening to you jokesters in the peanut gallery thank you very much.

# ? Jul 14, 2018 01:17

Ocean Book: Sep 27, 2010; - hi

lsd?

# ? Jul 14, 2018 01:32

numberoneposter: Feb 19, 2014; How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

you can drink chips so technically i think a bag of crushed up doritos is a water alternative

# ? Jul 14, 2018 01:33

ziasquinn: Jan 1, 2006; Fallen Rib

isn�t there a video of someone making dorito flavored water by filtering water through crushed doritos with a cheese cloth

was it the gatorade in a rice maker thread?

# ? Jul 14, 2018 03:42

Lime Tonics: Nov 7, 2015; by FactsAreUseless

A gallon of a super massive black hole has the same nourishment of 17~23 solar systems.

Should be enough for all.

# ? Jul 14, 2018 03:50

foonykins: Jun 15, 2010; stop with the small talk

Boxed wine is almost as cheap as water and it tastes like sad grapes and makes you make terrible decisions, could be what the tax man craves.

# ? Jul 14, 2018 04:01

Linux Pirate: Apr 21, 2012

Ocean Book posted:

lsd?

This is also a good option. Though liquid lsd is usually contained in high proof alcohol, at least for long term storage.

# ? Jul 14, 2018 04:05

Tenzarin: Jul 24, 2007; .; Taco Defender

Blender an apple into a drinkable liquid.

# ? Jul 14, 2018 04:05

house of the dad: Jul 4, 2005

Tenzarin posted:

Blender an apple into a drinkable liquid.

Apple seeds have cyanide in them you murderous fucker

# ? Jul 14, 2018 04:11

Lime Tonics: Nov 7, 2015; by FactsAreUseless

The fatal dose of hydrogen cyanide for an adult is about 50 mg. To get that from apple seeds you'd need to eat 60 g to 100 g of seeds in a fairly short time period (say, 12 hours). And you should crush them up first to ensure the hydrogen cyanide is absorbed - otherwise there's a chance they'd pass through you mostly undigested.

# ? Jul 14, 2018 04:16