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The Bloop
Jul 5, 2004

by Fluffdaddy

Skippy McPants posted:

Is there a dating site out there that has, like, a minimum competency test? Seems like there'd be a market for it.

I mean, no, but the 1000000 questions on OKC were good enough to at least give you massive red flags on weirdos most of the time in my experience

Mind you this was over a decade ago and things may have changed since I used it

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Basebf555
Feb 29, 2008

The greatest sensual pleasure there is is to know the desires of another!

Fun Shoe

LingcodKilla posted:

Seriously do any of these lines ever actually work? Or has one dude lied to another dude about it working and it’s just snowballed out of control?

The good thing about those lines existing is that "you seem like a really interesting person, want to grab a drink sometime?" turns into the ultimate pick-up line by comparison because you're just a normal dude.

BaronVonVaderham
Jul 31, 2011

All hail the queen!

The Bloop posted:

I mean, no, but the 1000000 questions on OKC were good enough to at least give you massive red flags on weirdos most of the time in my experience

Mind you this was over a decade ago and things may have changed since I used it

:same:

A friend who still uses it tells me it hasn't really changed. I had a few questions I always checked before reading anything else, stuff like "How often do you read books?" or "Is separation of church and state important?". Nowadays I'm sure that list would grow to include "Should vaccines be mandatory?" or "Who did you vote for in the 2016 election?".

SulfurMonoxideCute
Feb 9, 2008

I was under direct orders not to die
🐵❌💀

Dating apps are only as good as the people who use them. And people are garbage. Ergo: every dating app will always be garbage. Forever.

china bot
Sep 7, 2014

you listen HERE pal
SAY GOODBYE TO TELEPHONE SEX
Plaster Town Cop
really excited to be newly single and still have no better option than OKCupid :sadpeanut:

Crab Dad
Dec 28, 2002

behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB


china bot posted:

really excited to be newly single and still have no better option than OKCupid :sadpeanut:

Go to stripclubs while wearing a GI cut and tee shirt that that says “ Yeah I have Tricare”.

Master Twig
Oct 25, 2007

I want to branch out and I'm going to stick with it.
I use ok cupid and I have a normal profile with fully clothed pictures of me or me and friends, and my messages are individually tailored to the recipient, always mentioning something from their profile, and never making comments about their looks or my attraction to them.

And I get responses maybe 1 out of 100 times. The creeps might get better response rates than I do. Maybe there's something to it. Maybe I'm the AUG.

Sandwich Anarchist
Sep 12, 2008
Maybe nobody is obligated to respond to you just because you weren't a creep.

fisting by many
Dec 25, 2009



Maybe your profile picture is bad.

Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003

by Hand Knit

LingcodKilla posted:

Go to stripclubs while wearing a GI cut and tee shirt that that says “ Yeah I have Tricare”.



I've learned that lasagna is pretty effective too

Nostradingus
Jul 13, 2009

I used to get drunk and send OkCupid people the Bagel Bites jingle

Master Twig
Oct 25, 2007

I want to branch out and I'm going to stick with it.

Sandwich Anarchist posted:

Maybe nobody is obligated to respond to you just because you weren't a creep.

Of course not. Never said they were. Just making a point that you can follow all the advice and do things right on online dating and it's still a horrible poo poo show.

The Bloop
Jul 5, 2004

by Fluffdaddy

fisting by many posted:

Maybe your profile picture is of something bad.

Lechtansi
Mar 23, 2004

Item Get
If you want more of this, /r/niceguys is a perfect place to cringe.

Heres the top post right now. Girlfriend goes to a festival while boyfriend is out of town. She meets a tourist, tourist asks her out, she says no i have a BF, guy won't leave her alone. Finally she relents and gives him her boyfriends number so they can hash it out.

Heath
Apr 30, 2008

🍂🎃🏞️💦
Yeah that didn't happen

Like under what circumstances would letting him talk to her boyfriend be a better solution than just blocking his number entirely

Bolivar
Aug 20, 2011

Heath posted:

Yeah that didn't happen

Like under what circumstances would letting him talk to her boyfriend be a better solution than just blocking his number entirely

Under the circumstance where she wants to gently caress him but wants to outsource the responsibility and negative feelings about that to someone else.

Peg Sliderskew
Jan 4, 2010
All these posts about the different nicknames for McDonald's and not one pointing out it's spelled brekkie (or brekky)?

Unless you're Billy Ray Cyrus I suppose.

LadyPictureShow
Nov 18, 2005

Success!



computer angel posted:

Wow, two separate souls in two separate bodies. Beautifully poetic.

Before the follow up, I sent that to a few friends for a laugh.

‘Two separate souls in two different bodies’ yeah, that’s just two different people.

Sandwich Anarchist
Sep 12, 2008

LadyPictureShow posted:

Before the follow up, I sent that to a few friends for a laugh.

‘Two separate souls in two different bodies’ yeah, that’s just two different people.

:thejoke:

T-man
Aug 22, 2010


Talk shit, get bzzzt.

Lechtansi posted:

If you want more of this, /r/niceguys is a perfect place to cringe.

Heres the top post right now. Girlfriend goes to a festival while boyfriend is out of town. She meets a tourist, tourist asks her out, she says no i have a BF, guy won't leave her alone. Finally she relents and gives him her boyfriends number so they can hash it out.



I never want to see my name in this thread again, eww.

Tendai
Mar 16, 2007

"When the eagles are silent, the parrots begin to jabber."

Grimey Drawer
Nice to meet you, Fuckboy Chad.

text me a vag pic
May 18, 2007




Tendai posted:

Fuckboy Chad.

Mods???

Screaming Idiot
Nov 26, 2007

JUST POSTING WHILE JERKIN' MY GHERKIN SITTIN' IN A PERKINS!

BEATS SELLING MERKINS.

LingcodKilla posted:

Go to stripclubs while wearing a GI cut and tee shirt that that says “ Yeah I have Tricare”.



ha

haha

HAHAAHA

HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA

cash crab
Apr 5, 2015

all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology



Yeah?

text me a vag pic
May 18, 2007





namechange to fuckboy chad, or text me a fuckboy chad or fuckboy chad a vag pic or

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"

text me a chad pic

LawfulWaffle
Mar 11, 2014

Well, that aligns with the vibes I was getting. Which was, like, "normal" kinda vibes.
What's your number?

BiggerBoat
Sep 26, 2007

Don't you tell me my business again.

LawfulWaffle posted:

What's your number?

You'll have to speak directly to my nice guy boyfriend.

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.
beer me a Chad vag

cash crab
Apr 5, 2015

all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology


Bertrand Hustle posted:

text me a chad pic

Panfilo
Aug 27, 2011

EXISTENCE IS PAIN😬
Poz my Chad Hole

cash crab
Apr 5, 2015

all the time i am eating from the trashcan. the name of this trashcan is ideology


Chad texts, so what

Fumaofthelake
Dec 30, 2004

Is it handsome in here, or is it just me?


chad me daddy

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

beer me a Chad vag

It's like Icing. You hide a Chad vag somewhere for a person to find.

Comrade Koba
Jul 2, 2007

Chris-chad

Altared State
Jan 14, 2006

I think I was born to burn

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

and you could have it all


This was the cover for the Bloodhound Gang album Hefty Fine. The look on the cashier's face when I bought was hilarious.

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.

We Know Catheters posted:

This was the cover for the Bloodhound Gang album Hefty Fine. The look on the cashier's face when I bought was hilarious.

Yeah, I'd be surprised if I saw someone willingly paying money for a Bloodhound Gang album, too...

text me a vag pic
May 18, 2007




text chad a vag pic :(

for all the fun reads I have read, I reward you all with hell







KAWAA~BYIIIIIII

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"

Turbo describes the speed at which people run the gently caress away from him

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chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014


This was actually proven to be a fake using a woman's pictures without her permission.

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