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Cart posted:Engagement ring question: Does your gf have friends that you can establish a line of communication with and you can trust them to keep secret? If so, ask one about what her tastes are and what she expects in a ring. Odds are the discussion has come up before and if not she can find a way to fit it in. This is the route I took to figure out what she wants. I then went to a local diamond wholesaler in the area that staffs their own jeweler, I picked the main diamond and then they just made the band for it in house. I didn't get handed a glass of champagne and given a big comfy chair while shopping, but they were friendly and responsive and gave me a great deal. The main thing you need to do is find out what she likes. Some girls don't even care much for diamonds and are more interested in alternatives. This is potentially a huge purchase so it's definitely worth doing some research on her tastes. Also, insure it once you have it.
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Jul 23, 2018 23:09
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Renegret posted:Do you not have an account at the knot yet? It's got everything you need and everything you didn't know you needed. Nope. I'll check it out.
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Jul 23, 2018 23:33
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legendof posted:E: also it's really easy to become ordained as a priest online, maybe all the people whose weddings are officiated by friends have had those friends get ordained? Yea I'm "ordained" and have married a couple of my friends, and am doing another in October; I signed the marriage licenses myself and no one has come back to tell me it's invalid because I don't actually Love God so I'm pretty sure it's fine! e: Unitarian 4 lyfe Also engagement ring showed up from Brilliant Earth today, less than two weeks until my convoluted full-day proposal scenario kicks off!!!!
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Jul 24, 2018 17:01
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black.lion posted:Yea I'm "ordained" and have married a couple of my friends, and am doing another in October; I signed the marriage licenses myself and no one has come back to tell me it's invalid because I don't actually Love God so I'm pretty sure it's fine! This is good to know. I'm very secular and very much officiating my friend's wedding in September.
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Jul 24, 2018 18:31
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Cart posted:gf good with money... But if there's one area I don't want to appear cheap it's while asking her hand in marriage, and if every girl dreams of a Tiffany proposal then I'd re-evaluate things Have you considered shopping online? My ring is from an Etsy seller and I love it, and my partner got great advice and service. If you don't know the type of proposal your partner dreams of then it might be worth having some of those conversations before committing to marriage...
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Jul 24, 2018 18:41
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Cart posted:Engagement ring question: Shopping online is a great option. Online businesses don't have the same overhead to pay so tend to have better prices for the same qualities. Happy to help if you have any questions. I've sold engagement rings online for ten years.
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Jul 24, 2018 19:44
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Thanks for the advice - after exhausting a number of local shops I ended up going online to buy an engagement ring. The girlfriend and I had briefly discussed rings before, but she maintained that she wanted it to be a surprise and would freeze up a little when we'd go near a jewelry store. Fortunately, she'd sent her sister pictures of engagement rings she'd tried on and loved a few weeks ago, so it wasn't hard to find a similar design. I went with James Allen - I was impressed by the selection, price and ability to view the diamonds in detail. I'm pretty familiar with the 4Cs by now, but it was great to be able to speak to a specialist online who could compare multiple diamonds with similar characteristics and basically go "this one will be the sparkliest given its geometry". When I asked if she had any similar diamonds she'd recommend that I wasn't looking at, she went and found one $1,000 cheaper which looked just as good. In comparison, the local chain store was pushing me to order one sight unseen, couldn't answer questions about the diamond that would typically be on the certificate, and basically told me "sometimes you get lucky and it's perfectly clear". No thanks on a purchase this big. And it was basically a fraction of the cost of what Tiffany's would have been.
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Jul 25, 2018 16:03
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Got married, it was dope.
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Aug 1, 2018 20:27
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Invalid Octopus posted:Got married, it was dope. same, and same
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Aug 1, 2018 21:03
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My florist has been totally responsive up until the past two weeks when I said I had some changes I needed. She said she was fine with the changes, said she emailed me an updated proposal, but nothing was attached. That was a week ago and I've emailed her twice (first time immediately after just being like hey, I didn't get the PDF and then 2 days later) and called her today. No response. Is it a busy season? I don't really know what to do in this situation. She said she didn't get my check for my initial deposit that I mailed and I believe her because it wasn't cashed, but I assume the deposit amount has changed since there have been changes in the contract.
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Aug 1, 2018 22:04
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I got engaged in january and the wedding will be in september next year. So plenty of time to plan this whole thing. Does anyone have experience with fake flowers/wedding bouquet? Preferably made of paper crepe? I like the idea of having my flowers in any color I want (blue/white and mabe gold) and not worrying about them withering. Found this etsy shop: https://www.etsy.com/shop/Mazziflowers
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Aug 2, 2018 06:43
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Planning a wedding is a good way to highlight who your flaky friends and family are.
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Aug 2, 2018 22:00
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Surviving wedding planning with your fiance is a good litmus test over weather or not you should get married in the first place. We have discovered that we're okay to marry each other but we absolutely shouldn't get married to our family and friends.
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Aug 3, 2018 00:28
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Two months till we get married. We're at the phase where boxes from Crate and Barrel randomly show up and I ask "Did we register for this?"
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Aug 4, 2018 22:07
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Just putting it out there for people considering online registries: we had some bad experiences with Zola. In one instance, someone got us a set of wooden spoons. On the site they look like cooking spoons, no mention of actual size, but when they arrived, they were baby spoon sized. In another, we had selected a bedding set that looked nice and was about $150. When it arrived, it was a single square pillowcase. We returned it to Zola but were never issued a refund. We received three things off that registry, and only one was what we expected.
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Aug 5, 2018 20:25
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Welp I did it, I asked the question as all my convoluted plans were falling down around me in tatters. It was perfect yay now we have a year to figure out this wedding nonsense.
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Aug 8, 2018 16:23
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black.lion posted:Welp I did it, I asked the question as all my convoluted plans were falling down around me in tatters. It was perfect yay now we have a year to figure out this wedding nonsense. https://images-ext-2.discordapp.net/external/l3paoeUJ2mt0qj2oIjswZSLJlNnNbhUx6kwfsYXehsc/https/i.imgur.com/jhGRpN0.mp4
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Aug 8, 2018 17:01
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If only I'd known this existed  I'm so bad at being a millennial I don't even like texting
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Aug 8, 2018 17:03
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Where can I buy a good setting for an engagement ring (platinum maybe preferred) with 0.25-1ct of actual small diamonds in it and then get an 0.75-1ct CZ as the main stone? I'm fine if I have to buy the band, buy the cz on my own, and then take it to a place. Google has been absolutely not useful. You either get jewelry for children and the blind or places that only sell [every gemstone under the sun but not cz]. Also, that ziamond link in the op is really overpriced and probably shouldn't be there. edit: I found a place that sells settings that come pre-set with a CZ as a placeholder. That seems more or less like what we want for now. edit2: I am less of a man because I purchased an actual diamond. Khorne fucked around with this message at 22:36 on Aug 12, 2018 |
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Aug 9, 2018 15:37
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Got my dress today and only paid $130. It's a bridesmaid dress but I'm just going to accessorize it. The upside to having no bridal party is not having to worry about looking like a bridesmaid.
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Aug 11, 2018 22:24
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How does tipping work for weddings? I'm finding mixed messages, and I'm not sure how to calculate the tip for the waiters, bartenders, etc that will be working. Some places say 15-20% of the total, others say $20-50 a head. Our venue charges per head, but that includes the rental, food, service, etc.
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Aug 20, 2018 20:47
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Our hall recommended 3-5 per head for the wait staff and another 3-5 per head for the maitre d'. We actually did a little more because ours was so loving good. That covered the waiters, bartenders, valets, cooks, basically everyone supplied by the hall. I wasn't overly concerned for the valets and bartenders especially, your guests should be tipping them too. For the vendors, we did a flat rate based off of what we thought was appropriate. I honestly have very little recollection on how we came up with those numbers. We did some sort of combination of 20% and some ballparking on what we thought was appropriate. I think we erred on the heavy side so that nobody would hate us. In my opinion, you're slinging around tens of thousands of dollars on a wedding, if you can't spare the extra few hundred to properly thank the people who made it special then you overspent on the extras. I think it was $100 per photographer/videographer (we had 2 of each, so $400 for the photography company), $200 for the florist (just one person but there was a poo poo ton of labor and travel involved), $20 per live musician (We had a trio and piano for an hour each, and they didn't work work for a company so really we didn't have to tip them at all), and $100 each for the DJ and the MC. Our officiant was a close personal friend but we gave a $500 donation to his church (He's a priest). I also have $40 for the photo booth attendant written down but I don't think that's actually what we did. We might have given a flat $300 to the DJ as a whole. All in all we dropped almost three grand on tips alone, but it's something we budgeted for from the beginning. Lastly, we didn't give the limo anything, because our contract said that the gratuity was included in the price, plus the driver was a moron. Disclaimer: We had a Long Island wedding, which is loving stupid beyond belief and it's my understanding that most of the world doesn't work the way it does out here. e: The rule of thumb is, if they own the company, no tip. If they're an employee of the company, then you tip. That's why we didn't have to tip the musicians, because they worked for themselves. We tipped them anyway because personally, not tipping just feels wrong to me. Renegret fucked around with this message at 01:38 on Aug 21, 2018 |
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Aug 21, 2018 01:31
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I want to propose in the next few months. This will be the second go-round for both of us, and I couldn't be more excited - it really feels like this is right in every way. One thing I really appreciate about her is her discerning taste. Her wardrobe, house decor, entertaining style, etc are all both unique and sophisticated. I would like to propose in the traditional sense (as in a non-surprising surprise memorable moment) but I also would want rings to be something we later do together. I don't think working with her friends behind-the-scenes is what I want to do. Would it make sense to propose with a silicone ring or something like that? Or is there a better approach?
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Aug 23, 2018 17:02
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Does she normally wear rings? You could get her a nice but (relatively, compared to an engagement ring) inexpensive ring to propose with, and she could keep it and wear it sometimes on a dif finger/hand and remember that that's the ring you proposed with (dawww) even tho she has a nice sparkly engagement ring she helped pick out that she wears in the traditional spot. Or some other piece of jewelry she wears? The object-of-the-moment would probably have sentimental value so making it something non-disposable (e.g. not a ring pop) that she would enjoy pulling out occasionally to look at/wear/use would be my move.
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Aug 23, 2018 20:36
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I'm a huge proponent of just discussing it and buying the ring together. An engagement is too important to be a surprise. The ring that she's going to have to wear for her entire life is too important to be purchased without her input.
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Aug 23, 2018 20:54
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Surprise was the wrong word, and I do agree with what's been said. Perhaps my question should have been: is there a way to have a more traditional proposal that doesn't include jewelry picked unilaterally?
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Aug 23, 2018 21:18
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sweet_jones posted:Surprise was the wrong word, and I do agree with what's been said. Perhaps my question should have been: is there a way to have a more traditional proposal that doesn't include jewelry picked unilaterally? There's these really cheesy pre-ring rings you can get online if you look, but don't do it. I'm going to echo whet everyone else said. Go shopping/picking together, and then surprise her with the where/when/how.
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Aug 23, 2018 22:57
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Like ideally you have both discussed marriage, so selecting a ring and keeping the proposal a surprise is not much of a departure.
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Aug 24, 2018 03:13
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Take her to outback steakhouse and when she unfolds the bloomin' onion, boom theres the ring. She'll never forget that moment.
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Aug 24, 2018 03:36
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We looked at stone diameter vs finger diameter and then discussed ring band style and would casually wander into jewelery stores and browse to get get her temperature for what kind of ring and size stone she wanted and what her ring size was. I get that there's supposed to be some Hollywood style complete surprise but really I think it's ok to get her input. Ring shopping has been my girlfriend's absolute favorite hobby so far. On the flip side for about two weeks she went engagement crazy and was wandering when I was going to propose and pointed out there's no fun if it becomes an expected task on ticking timer. Finally she decided that she wouldn't bug me about when. Anyways, yeah there's nothing wrong with wandering in to kay Jewelers or Shane co to "window shop" in fact i highly suggest it. If you're not discussing long term plans this close to the engagement you may want to consider doing so as others suggested. About six months ago I bought her a cheaper ($50) silver ring with a synthetic ruby to kick off the ring search and get her thinking about her preferred band style and stone size, which has been a huge help, living with that ring daily she has narrowed down exactly what she does and does not like about it, so we have a high degree of confidence that she's enjoy her real ring for the long term. Hadlock fucked around with this message at 08:56 on Aug 24, 2018 |
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Aug 24, 2018 08:51
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Richard Bong posted:Like ideally you have both discussed marriage, so selecting a ring and keeping the proposal a surprise is not much of a departure. This. We've spent a lot of time discussing what comes next but I would like to propose and then do all ring stuff collaboratively. I'm wondering if I want to find the right moment and take a knee and pop the question without anything in my hands. Maybe I'm over thinking this?
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Aug 24, 2018 14:44
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Renegret posted:I'm a huge proponent of just discussing it and buying the ring together. An engagement is too important to be a surprise. The ring that she's going to have to wear for her entire life is too important to be purchased without her input. Entire life == "until/unless she has kids and doesn't want to risk scratching the baby's face and also while pregnant the ring won't even fit anymore" but I do agree, anyway. 
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Aug 24, 2018 15:53
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Orthodox Rabbit posted:Take her to outback steakhouse and when she unfolds the bloomin' onion, boom theres the ring. She'll never forget that moment. ***unfolds onion, the middle is empty*** Me: PUT IT ON Her: B-but it's still ho- Me: If you love me you will WEAR THIS BLOOMIN' ONION WITH PRIDE ***lives happily ever after***
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Aug 24, 2018 17:32
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silvergoose posted:Entire life == "until/unless she has kids and doesn't want to risk scratching the baby's face and also while pregnant the ring won't even fit anymore" but I do agree, anyway. I see you haven't met my wife then. Looking beautiful is far more important than that baby's face anyway
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Aug 25, 2018 00:39
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I'm going to brag for a sec but my husband and I just celebrated our 10 year anniversary last week. Thanks to everyone in this thread for commenting, being cool, and I wish a lifetime of happiness to all.
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Aug 25, 2018 03:52
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quote:The new proposal also includes the cost for the outdoor ceremony chairs, which were not included in the original cost and were located under optional costs. quote:Hi K, Changing the icing to chocolate does not cost $721.  Edit: apparently with $2 * 175 guests plus an 18% service charge plus 8% tax means the frosting is $440. gently caress this. Residency Evil fucked around with this message at 00:00 on Sep 2, 2018 |
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Sep 1, 2018 18:26
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Jesus. Our cake is around $450 and feeds 100. About to put the invites in the mail and I'm kind of giddy. Wedding is 62 days out.
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Sep 3, 2018 00:00
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Cart posted:I went with James Allen - I was impressed by the selection, price and ability to view the diamonds in detail. I'm pretty familiar with the 4Cs by now, but it was great to be able to speak to a specialist online who could compare multiple diamonds with similar characteristics and basically go "this one will be the sparkliest given its geometry". When I asked if she had any similar diamonds she'd recommend that I wasn't looking at, she went and found one $1,000 cheaper which looked just as good. In comparison, the local chain store was pushing me to order one sight unseen, couldn't answer questions about the diamond that would typically be on the certificate, and basically told me "sometimes you get lucky and it's perfectly clear". No thanks on a purchase this big. And it was basically a fraction of the cost of what Tiffany's would have been. That jeweller should never sell again. "Sometimes you get lucky and it's perfectly clear" is the biggest load of horse poo poo I have ever heard of. If I said that to one of my clients I would 100% expect them to just leave haha. Glad you didn't go with Tiffany's, they're just SO expensive for what you get. If you don't care about the name it's like throwing money into the ocean. sweet_jones posted:This. We've spent a lot of time discussing what comes next but I would like to propose and then do all ring stuff collaboratively. I'm wondering if I want to find the right moment and take a knee and pop the question without anything in my hands. Maybe I'm over thinking this? I'm about to make a ring for a good friend of mine right now who is proposing with a silver/CZ ring so they can ring shop together 
Claes Oldenburger fucked around with this message at 19:28 on Sep 5, 2018 |
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Sep 5, 2018 19:25
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My girlfriend of almost six years and I area talking engagement, and I'm looking for a ring. My budget is under $2000. We were just browsing in the local mall, and the people at Helzberg Diamonds were super helpful (and as it turned out, I play Magic with one of the saleswoman's brother). I have sort of an idea of what she wants, mostly a cushion cut diamond. I wish Brilliant Earth had a showroom in New York, because I have trouble buying things over $1000 without seeing them in person. Is there a downside to finding out what exactly she wants by shopping local, and then buying the closest match on Brilliant Earth?
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Sep 12, 2018 15:22
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LifeLynx posted:My girlfriend of almost six years and I area talking engagement, and I'm looking for a ring. My budget is under $2000. We were just browsing in the local mall, and the people at Helzberg Diamonds were super helpful (and as it turned out, I play Magic with one of the saleswoman's brother). I have sort of an idea of what she wants, mostly a cushion cut diamond. I wish Brilliant Earth had a showroom in New York, because I have trouble buying things over $1000 without seeing them in person. Is there a downside to finding out what exactly she wants by shopping local, and then buying the closest match on Brilliant Earth? That’s what my fiancé and I did and I’m very happy with my ring that he got me.
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Sep 12, 2018 15:37
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