musk: Mister PIB

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Serious Hardware/Software Crap > YOSPOS > musk: Mister PIB

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infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

what appears to be minor damage to the fender actually completely totals the car

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:21

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 18, 2024 15:57

Cocoa Crispies: Jul 20, 2001; Vehicular Manslaughter!; Pillbug

infernal machines posted:

what appears to be minor damage to the fender actually completely totals the car

lmao that�s a perfectly ordinary Camry dent

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:41

heated game moment: Oct 30, 2003; Lipstick Apathy

infernal machines posted:

what appears to be minor damage to the fender actually completely totals the car

lol at all the people vehemently defending it in that thread

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:42

ADINSX: Sep 9, 2003; Wanna run with my crew huh? Rule cyberspace and crunch numbers like I do?

infernal machines posted:

what appears to be minor damage to the fender actually completely totals the car

Probably for the best if insurance actually paid out the price of the car

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:44

President Beep: Apr 30, 2009; i have to have a car because otherwise i cant drive around the country solving mysteries while being doggedly pursued by federal marshals for a crime i did not commit (9/11)

the glass jaw joe of cars

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:45

prisoner of waffles: May 8, 2007; Ah! well a-day! what evil looks
Had I from old and young!
Instead of the cross, the fishmech
About my neck was hung.

lemon party: stop and smell the musk

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:46

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

prisoner of waffles posted:

lemon party: stop and smell the musk

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:47

FAT32 SHAMER: Aug 16, 2012

prisoner of waffles posted:

lemon party: stop and smell the musk

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:49

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

incels interlinked posted:

lol at all the people vehemently defending it in that thread

look, it's entirely normal for there to be a poison palm strike point on every car

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:52

SardonicTyrant: Feb 26, 2016; BTICH IM A NEWT
熱くなれ夢みた明日を
必ずいつかつかまえる
走り出せ振り向くことなく
&

incels interlinked posted:

lol at all the people vehemently defending it in that thread

That's certainly one way to increase demand.

infernal machines posted:

look, it's entirely normal for there to be a poison palm strike point on every car

The Five-Point Exploding Car technique

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:54

prisoner of waffles: May 8, 2007; Ah! well a-day! what evil looks
Had I from old and young!
Instead of the cross, the fishmech
About my neck was hung.

SardonicTyrant posted:

That's certainly one way to increase demand.
The Five-Point Exploding Car technique

the digging holes and filling them in again of automakers

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:56

Ellie Crabcakes: Feb 1, 2008; Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

prisoner of waffles posted:

lemon party: stop and smell the musk

# ? Sep 17, 2018 17:58

Poniard: Apr 3, 2011

i'm waking up
to ash and musk
i wipe my rear end and i slap my nuts

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:02

Cocoa Crispies: Jul 20, 2001; Vehicular Manslaughter!; Pillbug

President Beep posted:

Hi, r/tesla! So, ummmm... my M3 is on fire

should be posting that to /r/bmw

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:19

Eeyo: Aug 29, 2004

ate all the Oreos posted:

y'all are thinking too small. what we need are ejection seats, ones that have enough rocket power to boost you high enough for a chute to deploy

no YOU are thinking too small. what we need is for Elon to re-use the rocket landing technology from SpaceX. eject, land using thrusters, then you can plop the old ejected seat into a new tesla!

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:28

elite_garbage_man: Apr 3, 2010; I THINK THAT "PRIMA DONNA" IS "PRE-MADONNA". I MAY BE ILLITERATE.

ate all the Oreos posted:

y'all are thinking too small. what we need are ejection seats, ones that have enough rocket power to boost you high enough for a chute to deploy

Every car comes with a flight suit and helmet so you can cosplay Goose from Top Gun on the way out.

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:30

Shame Boy: Mar 2, 2010

incels interlinked posted:

lol at all the people vehemently defending it in that thread

quote:

Eriamjh1138Y 13 points 5 months ago
This is why 5mph bumpers were invented.

Some people might call this a design defect. Minor crashes should not sustain major damage.

[�]sixteenbits 6 points 5 months ago
He's driving a car which gets stellar safety ratings from the NHTSA. Part of what makes these cars exceptionally safe is the node design. Yes, it's not easy to fix when damaged, but this is part of the tradeoff for exceptional safety. Also, again, the damage you may discern from a single exterior image is not necessarily indicative of internal damage.

you see safe cars didn't exist until musk invented them personally

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:39

Shame Boy: Mar 2, 2010

oh my god it doesn't stop

quote:

[�]SucreTeaseModel S 100D 8 points 5 months ago
I guess that what this suggests is that the whole reason that the crash damage appears to be relatively minor is entirely because of how well designed the frame and subframe are to absorb the energy of the collision and prevent folding of the vehicle into the passenger compartment�i.e. the nodes cracking instead of the car collapsing.

ah yes the reason why your tiny 5mph crash appears to be minor is only because the car is so good at safety, a normal car would have imploded into a neutron star the moment anything tapped the bumper

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:40

gschmidl: Sep 3, 2011; watch with knife hands

ate all the Oreos posted:

ah yes the reason why your tiny 5mph crash appears to be minor is only because the car is so good at safety, a normal car would have imploded into a neutron star the moment anything tapped the bumper

Can confirm.

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:47

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

https://twitter.com/Reuters/status/1041745139432087554

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:47

jre: Sep 2, 2011; To the cloud ?

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

https://twitter.com/Reuters/status/1041745139432087554

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:48

President Beep: Apr 30, 2009; i have to have a car because otherwise i cant drive around the country solving mysteries while being doggedly pursued by federal marshals for a crime i did not commit (9/11)

finally, elon gets his day in court!

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:48

Shame Boy: Mar 2, 2010

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

https://twitter.com/Reuters/status/1041745139432087554

ok but if he wasn't a pedo why didn't he sue me sooner huh, how about that :smug:

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:48

Rockopolis: Dec 21, 2012; I MAKE FUN OF QUEER STORYGAMES BECAUSE I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO WITH MY LIFE THAN MAKE OTHER PEOPLE CRY

I can't understand these kinds of games, and not getting it bugs me almost as much as me being weird

H.P. Hovercraft posted:

https://twitter.com/Reuters/status/1041745139432087554

Assault?

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:51

univbee: Jun 3, 2004

Rockopolis posted:

Assault?

verbal, probably

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:52

FAT32 SHAMER: Aug 16, 2012

Rockopolis posted:

Assault?

iirc in commonwealth countries you can be verbally assaulted

e;

quote:

There are three offences that someone who uses "threatening, abusive or insulting" language in a public place may been deemed to have committed. (These offences can also be committed in a private place if what is said is audible outside. They also apply to similar behaviour and the display of similar posters, pictures or signs.) All three offences fall under the Public Order Act 1986.

The least serious is under section 5. Here it is an offence to use threatening, abusive or insulting words within the hearing of someone likely to be caused harassment, alarm or distress by them. So the prosecution have to show only that there was someone else present who might have been caused harassment, alarm or distress, not that anyone actually was. This person could in some cases be the police officer who then goes on to arrest the person, but the courts have taken the line that police officers, exposed to bad language on a daily basis, can be assumed to be fairly robust and far less likely to be offended than others.

Section 4A makes it an offence to use threatening, abusive or insulting language with the intention of causing someone else harassment, alarm or distress. The offence is only committed if it has that effect.

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:53

Poniard: Apr 3, 2011

elon musk (WHO DID NOT EVEN INHALE)

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:54

President Beep: Apr 30, 2009; i have to have a car because otherwise i cant drive around the country solving mysteries while being doggedly pursued by federal marshals for a crime i did not commit (9/11)

where's the suit been filed? UK?

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:54

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

FAT32 SHAMER posted:

iirc in commonwealth countries you can be verbally assaulted

most places in america work this way too (actually hitting someone is usually called battery)

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:54

President Beep: Apr 30, 2009; i have to have a car because otherwise i cant drive around the country solving mysteries while being doggedly pursued by federal marshals for a crime i did not commit (9/11)

Poniard posted:

elon musk (WHO DID NOT EVEN INHALE)

IK, R????

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:55

FrozenVent: May 1, 2009; The Boeing 737-200QC is the undisputed workhorse of the skies.

how is that breaking news though

BREAKING NEWS - North Carolina wet following passage of hurricane

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:55

mewse: May 2, 2006

your honor I would suggest you do your research. do you know what the #1 industry in pattaya is. case closed

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:56

Poniard: Apr 3, 2011

how many teslas were left to die in the path of hurricane florence

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:58

H.P. Hovercraft: Jan 12, 2004; one thing a computer can do that most humans can't is be sealed up in a cardboard box and sit in a warehouse; Slippery Tilde

FrozenVent posted:

how is that breaking news though

BREAKING NEWS - North Carolina wet following passage of hurricane

they just filed the suit today in california

presumably either musk refused to settle or simply didn't reply to the lawyer's previous letter

# ? Sep 17, 2018 18:59

Shame Boy: Mar 2, 2010

Poniard posted:

how many teslas were left to die in the path of hurricane florence

remember when they increased the range on all teslas in florida for like a week to allow people to flee the hurricane last year, wonder if they did that this time :allears:

# ? Sep 17, 2018 19:08

infernal machines: Oct 11, 2012; we monitor many frequencies. we listen always. came a voice, out of the babel of tongues, speaking to us. it played us a mighty dub.

yeah, they did.

c-spam freaked out upon learning of software-locked feature differentiation

# ? Sep 17, 2018 19:13