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Malachite_Dragon
Mar 31, 2010

Weaving Merry Christmas magic

Snowglobe of Doom posted:

The best poop knife in the history of mankind was a knife made out of frozen poop which this guy used to dig himself out of an avalanche:


To be fair, that man was so :rock: it's entirely possible he just straight shat steel.

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barbecue at the folks
Jul 20, 2007


Jedit posted:

I'm sighing as I draw my kakatana

God drat it I was coming to post this. Honor must be satisfied, butt'leths at dawn! :manning:

Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos



Sunswipe posted:

Is there a word or phrase for the reverse of milkshake ducked?


Screaming Idiot posted:

Hot cocoa badger.

purple death ray
Jul 28, 2007

me omw 2 steal ur girl

Jedit
Dec 10, 2011

Proudly supporting vanilla legends 1994-2014

barbecue at the folks posted:

God drat it I was coming to post this. Honor must be satisfied, butt'leths at dawn! :manning:

I thought the idea of the poop knife was to make sure there weren't any Klingons.

Lemniscate Blue
Apr 21, 2006

Here we go again.

Jedit posted:

I thought the idea of the poop knife was to make sure there weren't any Klingons.

Crapla'!

flavor.flv
Apr 18, 2008

I got a letter from the government the other day
opened it, read it
it said they was bitches




Do Klingon households have a butt'leth?

purple death ray
Jul 28, 2007

me omw 2 steal ur girl

:cmon:

LITERALLY A BIRD
Sep 27, 2008

I knew you were trouble
when you flew in

sebmojo
Oct 23, 2010


Legit Cyberpunk









goferchan posted:

Yeah for example:

Dynamic horse testicles, they shrink in cold weather
Name your horse
You can scold or praise your horse
Whistle radius grows when the horse bond grows
Horse equipment is fully customizable, from the saddle that has golden pins to the hair
A Dutch preview said they put dreadlocks in the hair of their horse
Horses poo poo dynamically
Walk your horse around
Jump from your horse onto a moving train
Brush your horses. Arthur makes remarks about the horse depending on the horses gender
Store horses in stables so you have more backup horses
Horses die and can't be resurrected
Tell a horse to flee to spare it's life
Horses kick behind them. In one preview they even killed a man
Horses have personalities
Horses move sideways
Horses can learn tricks
John Marston and Bill Williamson have the same voice actor as the last game
Opossums play dead like in real life
Drive-able trains
The map contains 5 states: Lemoyne, Ambarino, New Hannover, West Elizabeth and NEW AUSTIN
Dead bodies won't despawn but decompose and attract scavengers
Newspapers return
Condensation and glowing heat from bullets
Snow trails
Hunted animals make terrible dying sounds
Animals have a different marker than dead bodies
You are able to pick up most items in the game
Different camera angles
Spilled oil has that "rainbow" look to it
192 music tracks from original composer
Physics just like real life
Honor system returns
Prostitutes can be used but no full nudity
Gunfight legendary shooters
You might find notes in drawers and learn useful information
Dynamic weather yet again confirmed

I don't know why I find this funny

TheRagamuffin
Aug 31, 2008

In Paradox Space, when you cross the line, your nuts are mine.

dreadmojo posted:

I don't know why I find this funny

I would never have guessed the thread.

china bot
Sep 7, 2014

you listen HERE pal
SAY GOODBYE TO TELEPHONE SEX
Plaster Town Cop
can someone link me to the photoshop phriday/comedy goldmine article with the intentionally low-quality photoshops? I'm looking for the photoshopped Jingle All the Way poster where Arnold's head was replaced with OJ Simpson's mugshot

ulex minor
Apr 30, 2018

Space Flower posted:

You act like this visual novel and its King Arthur sex scenes are beneath you but it's resonated deeply with countless people.

Paladinus
Jan 11, 2014

heyHEYYYY!!!
Anime is bad.

Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos

I read this thread and waited for this person to be dunked on, but most of them are taking their side?! :psyduck:

tactlessbastard
Feb 4, 2001

Godspeed, post
Fun Shoe

Paladinus posted:

Anime is bad.

This isn't the self evident truths thread

Griefor
Jun 11, 2009

Absurd Alhazred posted:

I read this thread and waited for this person to be dunked on, but most of them are taking their side?! :psyduck:

I was one level more naive than you, I actually thought the quote itself was ironic.

Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos

Griefor posted:

I was one level more naive than you, I actually thought the quote itself was ironic.

Irony is dead but anime lives still. Verily, the worst of all worlds.

Edit for content:

tactlessbastard posted:

Unfortunately, there's not a single person on the planet that can appropriately comprehend how their personal experience isn't universal.

Straight White Shark posted:

speak for yourself :colbert:

Absurd Alhazred has a new favorite as of 14:46 on Oct 11, 2018

Pirate Radar
Apr 18, 2008

You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!
A King Arthur-themed sex scene is where you hit it so hard whoever can pull you out becomes the next King of England

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.

Pirate Radar posted:

A King Arthur-themed sex scene is where you hit it so hard whoever can pull you out becomes the next King of England

Someone please post the "berry my dick in ur rear end" Facebook post.

Pirate Radar
Apr 18, 2008

You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!

Fleta Mcgurn posted:

Someone please post the "berry my dick in ur rear end" Facebook post.

This? https://m.imgur.com/r/funny/R532pTw

purple death ray
Jul 28, 2007

me omw 2 steal ur girl

Pirate Radar posted:

A King Arthur-themed sex scene is where you hit it so hard whoever can pull you out becomes the next King of England

Cumalot

E: the round table but it's like, a titty

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.
P sure King Arthur themed sex scene is when you're getting cucked by your best friend and you really can't bring yourself to care until your bastard son starts making a fuss and then everyone has to kill each other

Fleta Mcgurn
Oct 5, 2003

Porpoise noise continues.

Yessss thank you so much

Araenna
Dec 27, 2012




Lipstick Apathy

endlessmonotony posted:

We all die and poo poo ourselves, and if we're lucky, it'll be in that order.

BravestOfTheLamps
Oct 12, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Lipstick Apathy

Pirate Radar posted:

A King Arthur-themed sex scene is where you hit it so hard whoever can pull you out becomes the next King of England

Excalibur is a great movie

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

BravestOfTheLamps posted:

Excalibur is a great movie

Truth. I may watch it when I get home.

Altared State
Jan 14, 2006

I think I was born to burn

BravestOfTheLamps posted:

Excalibur is a great movie

Great movie to put you to sleep

haveblue
Aug 15, 2005



Toilet Rascal
More like John Bore-man

WITCHCRAFT
Aug 28, 2007

Berries That Burn
Excalibur, much like Disney's Alladin, is best viewed from a well worn and heavily degraded VHS tape. :colbert:

Lobok
Jul 13, 2006

Say Watt?

WITCHCRAFT posted:

Excalibur, much like Disney's Alladin, is best viewed from a well worn and heavily degraded VHS tape. :colbert:

I did watch Excalibur on an old VHS tape but I never understood the ending. Arthur goes into final battle against Mordred and then all of a sudden the movie becomes footage of my uncle's second wedding.

Dixville
Nov 4, 2008

I don't think!
Ham Wrangler

It's funny cause it's true

Flash Gordon Ramsay
Sep 28, 2004

Grimey Drawer

Lobok posted:

I did watch Excalibur on an old VHS tape but I never understood the ending. Arthur goes into final battle against Mordred and then all of a sudden the movie becomes footage of my uncle's second wedding.

Never been a fan of director's cuts

Solice Kirsk
Jun 1, 2004

.

Lobok posted:

I did watch Excalibur on an old VHS tape but I never understood the ending. Arthur goes into final battle against Mordred and then all of a sudden the movie becomes footage of my uncle's second wedding.

It was a Nova special about great white sharks for me, but basically the same.

WeedlordGoku69
Feb 12, 2015

by Cyrano4747

Absurd Alhazred posted:

I read this thread and waited for this person to be dunked on, but most of them are taking their side?! :psyduck:

Fate/stay night is... quirky, but weirdly good for what it is

It's maybe 5% King Arthur sex, 10% meditations on the nature of heroism and different ways it can manifest, 35% food, and 50% mythological heroes beating the holy hell gently caress out of each other with crazy-rear end superpowers

Breetai
Nov 6, 2005

🥄Mah spoon is too big!🍌

WITCHCRAFT posted:

Excalibur, much like Disney's Alladin, is best viewed from a well worn and heavily degraded VHS tape. :colbert:

Lobok posted:

I did watch Excalibur on an old VHS tape but I never understood the ending. Arthur goes into final battle against Mordred and then all of a sudden the movie becomes footage of my uncle's second wedding.

Does it end with your Aunt being heavily degraded on the VHS tape?

Kitfox88
Aug 21, 2007

Anybody lose their glasses?

LORD OF BOOTY posted:

Fate/stay night is... quirky, but weirdly good for what it is

It's maybe 5% King Arthur sex, 10% meditations on the nature of heroism and different ways it can manifest, 35% food, and 50% mythological heroes beating the holy hell gently caress out of each other with crazy-rear end superpowers

The 5% is really uncomfortable poo poo though but if you remove all the dragon sex and assaults and junk the remaining 90% is pretty cool, though unabashedly Anime As gently caress.

BravestOfTheLamps
Oct 12, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Lipstick Apathy
i am 120% king arthur sex


you wont get anything better

BravestOfTheLamps
Oct 12, 2012

by FactsAreUseless
Lipstick Apathy
it is a dream i have

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Dixville
Nov 4, 2008

I don't think!
Ham Wrangler
PM me :wink:

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