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Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:
Is there any reason we can't open a portal to some brain worms and flood the shop?

I voted against it but yakity saxing a portal to the infinite crabberson breeding grounds would be hilarious right now.

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Blasphemaster
Jul 10, 2008

Well, we do have the skull of the dead cleric in Mr. Lich's storage closet. Let's have it reanimated and put some bat wings on it or whatever amd have it dive bomb the enemy singing horribly off key showtunes. Freak people the gently caress out.

Then use that as a distraction to cover for the portal to the Brain Sea Slug dimension opening up.

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

A - "I'm fine, all things considered. You spend a life travelling the planes and see if you look this good."

Relentless
Sep 22, 2007

It's a perfect day for some mayhem!


Splicer posted:

A - Talk our way out.

"Several months ago while investigating a newly formed plain I was attacked by some form of octopus lady with a penchant for transformation spells. I am recovering, but uncomfortable."

I like it.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:
Also A. "You spend too long in the abyss and what do you think happens?"

srusnak102
Apr 13, 2015
BC. All out.

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007

Outrail posted:

Also A. "You spend too long in the abyss and what do you think happens?"

Grey Hunter
Oct 17, 2007

Hero of the soviet union.
Accidental destroyer of planets

Are you looking at my octobutt?

”What?” Sarga cursed inwardly. Why was it always the stupid looking ones who saw through illusions. Think quick. ”Oh, you’ve noticed. Let us just say I am dealing with some side effects of interplaner travel. I’m seeking treatment, but I have a way to go.”
”Side effects?” the warrior asked.
”Lets just say, when you travel through the abyss, the abyss can travel back with you. Magic has a tendency to warp things a little. It’s nothing to worry about.”
”It looks like you have tentacles….” the warrior wasn’t sold, Sarga could see this. But then the wizard jumped in.
”Happens all the time my dear friend, why, I had a third ear after a battle with a cursed mutant.”
”Oh, he bit you?” Sarga replied, forcing a friendly tone into her voice.
”Yes. I ended up having surgery to fix it. The car ended up looking like a lightning bolt, look!” he lifted up his hood to show it.
”Oh. Okay.” The warrior wasn’t completely convinced, but he was mollified.
”So, you want me to breach the block on planer travel and teleport you to this other realm. Are you sure, you don’t know what’s on the other side.”
”Oh, but we do. It’s some monster pretending to be a god. We should deal with it easily.”
”Okay, I can do it, for a fee of two thousand gold. Playable up front, incase you are mistaken in your abilities, of course.”
”Pay the woman Sir Allister.” the mage said, and the warrior grumpily paid her the money.
”okay,come into my lab.” the followed into the back room, the beavers had the real owner of the shop tied up in the back, and they had quickly redressed it with a teleportation circle. Their work was good, and it looked like it had been here for years. The three heroes stood in the middle and Sarga raised her hands.
”And off you go!”


We pulled that one back! And now we get to teleport the heroes to
A - Our cells!
B - Asherahs realm (with him waiting.)
C - Some horrible location.
D - Under the sea above our base.
E - Somewhere else.


quote:

Mana = 90/450
2 Manawells 1000/1000, 1000/1000
Gold = 22,570 in the vault at the Sapphire Grotto (plus the dragon's horde, not counted and not ours per say.)
Income per week - 750
Wages per week - 150
Paying the gnome 250 for redirection
Net Per week - 350

Minions -
Seaglass, the Stingray Lieutenant.
Irwin the Stingray Lieutenant.
Asherah - the Hammerheaded “god”
Valen Haardckla, Supervizor.
Krull and Khrol, Seatrolls.
89 Beaverpeople. 15 beaverkids. (lead by Holta.)
19 Vampire Octasquids.
A selection of Bodkin Eels.
6 Mantis-pistol-shrimp man.
12 Crabbersons.
100 refugees.

Well defended entrance.
Spike traps, magical traps, blast doors, loop holes, teleportation zones and a bound sea elemental.
Living quarters - attuned to restore 4 mana a day.
Barracks for 50 people.
Large lab.
A library full or rare books.

Splicer
Oct 16, 2006

from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸
Send the wizards into the careful prepared magic-resistant holding spells we definitely have.

Send Sir Alistair several thousand feet into the air directly above whoever we're currently most annoyed at.

e: we put the cells in raugh's room.

Splicer fucked around with this message at 10:20 on Nov 7, 2018

Anticheese
Feb 13, 2008

$60,000,000 sexbot
:rodimus:

B. They did ask for this...

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

AB

Split the party!

The Lone Badger
Sep 24, 2007

C. Somewhere very very deep.

Asehujiko
Apr 6, 2011
ABE

The first one gets sent to Asherah's realm. Into the middle of a dozen crossbowmen. Under no circumstance is this hero to ever be anywhere within line of sight of Asherah, he might be carrying god slaying equipment.

The second gets dropped into the volcano(or preferably, into a gas pocket deep inside the magma chamber).

The last one will be teleported just a few meters to the next room over, into a cage. He will be immediately subdued and converted/killed.

AJ_Impy
Jun 17, 2007

SWORD OF SMATTAS. CAN YOU NOT HEAR A WORLD CRY OUT FOR JUSTICE? WHEN WILL YOU DELIVER IT?
Yam Slacker
Spread them out.

Liquid Communism
Mar 9, 2004


Out here, everything hurts.




AJ_Impy posted:

Spread them out.

Exactly. Preferably with a bit of dramatics regarding the forces being too powerful to breach, so they don't immediately blame us.

Nephzinho
Jan 25, 2008





These dudes are clearly trying to get there because they're equipped to deal with Asherah, we probably shouldn't put them there for any kind of theatrics on the off chance they get their mission complete on their way to dying. If our cells are adequately inescapable, drop them there. If not, lava.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:

Liquid Communism posted:

Exactly. Preferably with a bit of dramatics regarding the forces being too powerful to breach, so they don't immediately blame us.

Do they Fae want a wizard? They can have a wizard. I'm sure Raugh and some beavers would love someone to talk, she loves valiant knights.

E: I mean, 'Getting visited by knights armed and prepared for something other than a dragon' is literally her MO and favourite thing in the whole world.

Outrail fucked around with this message at 15:51 on Nov 7, 2018

Nephzinho
Jan 25, 2008





Outrail posted:

Do they Fae want a wizard? They can have a wizard. I'm sure Raugh and some beavers would love someone to talk, she loves valiant knights.

E: I mean, 'Getting visited by knights armed and prepared for something other than a dragon' is literally her MO and favourite thing in the whole world.

Alive in cells means they provide us with information and are converted into allies, though.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:

Nephzinho posted:

Alive in cells means they provide us with information and are converted into allies, though.

Clarification: Raugh's MO and favourite thing in the world is to spend long, long hours talking to valiant knights who come knocking with poorly thought out equipment choices. I'm sure the Fae have similar interests.

Beerdeer
Apr 25, 2006

Frank Herbert's Dude

AJ_Impy posted:

Spread them out.

Volmarias
Dec 31, 2002

EMAIL... THE INTERNET... SEARCH ENGINES...
E: The Sun

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:

Volmarias posted:

E: The Sun

Awsome avatar/vote combo

Toughy
Nov 29, 2004

KAVODEL! KAVODEL!

Volmarias posted:

E: The Sun

Blasphemaster
Jul 10, 2008

Volmarias posted:

E: The Sun

:flashfap:

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:
Opening a portal to the sun could have consequences.... Just saying.

IcePhoenix
Sep 18, 2005

Take me to your Shida

Outrail posted:

Opening a portal to the sun could have consequences.... Just saying.

yeah the heat would probably just vaporize us (and everything nearby) instantly

super sweet best pal
Nov 18, 2009

Fire! Fire!

(still sticking with my original vote though)

Blasphemaster
Jul 10, 2008

If we make it teleportation instean of a portal we should be just fine. They won't, but that's just a happy accident.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:

Blasphemaster posted:

If we make it teleportation instean of a portal we should be just fine. They won't, but that's just a happy accident.

Portable portal to the sun in a box that get triggered when you hit the little tripwire running out the side.

I just invented a magical IED.

Not Alex
Oct 9, 2012

Cut loose before the god eaters show up.

Outrail posted:

Portable portal to the sun in a box that get triggered when you hit the little tripwire running out the side.

I just invented a magical IED.

More of an IAD. The "A" is for apocalypse. Depending on how you rig the portal you either send the planet rocketing off into space on its very own fusion rocket or you basically split the planet like a coconut.

Not Alex fucked around with this message at 07:11 on Nov 8, 2018

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:

Not Alex posted:

More of an IAD. The "A" is for apocalypse. Depending on how you rig the portal you either send the planet rocketing off into space on its very own fusion rocket or you basically split the planet like a coconut.

I figure the heat almost instantly scrubs out the portal markings so it only lasts a split second. But I do like the 'planetary orion platform' idea.

Nephzinho
Jan 25, 2008





Really at this point i'm voting anywhere but where they wanted to go, y'all have fun with your variations of "plummeting to your doom".

Volmarias
Dec 31, 2002

EMAIL... THE INTERNET... SEARCH ENGINES...
Only the sun will do. If their Wizard is stronger than the sun then we were doomed from the start.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:

Volmarias posted:

Only the sun will do. If their Wizard is stronger than the sun then we were doomed from the start.

What if he's powered by the sun? Or malicious acts of dickery?

Or they saw this coming and it's a reverse bamboozle?

Volmarias
Dec 31, 2002

EMAIL... THE INTERNET... SEARCH ENGINES...
It's not nine dimensional chess here.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U7XVcqZodAM

Not Alex
Oct 9, 2012

Cut loose before the god eaters show up.

Outrail posted:

I figure the heat almost instantly scrubs out the portal markings so it only lasts a split second. But I do like the 'planetary orion platform' idea.

The trick is to scribe the portal in channeled fire so it's self-sustaining once it activates.

Outrail
Jan 4, 2009

www.sapphicrobotica.com
:roboluv: :love: :roboluv:

Not Alex posted:

The trick is to scribe the portal in channeled fire so it's self-sustaining once it activates.

Stick in another filtered portal in low orbit and tada! Your planet is now a self sustaining intersolar exploration vehicle.

Until the sun runs out, but you can find another sun.

srusnak102
Apr 13, 2015
D

Blasphemaster
Jul 10, 2008

Outrail posted:

Stick in another filtered portal in low orbit and tada! Your planet is now a self sustaining intersolar exploration vehicle.

Until the sun runs out, but you can find another sun.

This is something that bugged be about Salvation. If ships use a portal dropped into the sun to make nuclear exhaust for thrust, how does the sun not shrivel up and die, or do some kind of equalization between both sides of the portal?

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dont be mean to me
May 2, 2007

I'm interplanetary, bitch
Let's go to Mars


Blasphemaster posted:

This is something that bugged be about Salvation. If ships use a portal dropped into the sun to make nuclear exhaust for thrust, how does the sun not shrivel up and die, or do some kind of equalization between both sides of the portal?

Without having read the book:

Your thrust aperture, for not a planet at any rate, is measured in meters, perhaps dozens of meters, in two dimensions.

The star is measured in hundreds of millions of meters, in three dimensions.

This limits how much star you can use up and how rapidly the star can try to dump itself through the portal (assuming it doesn't shatter or expand the portal on its own, which admittedly isn't all that safe an assumption because it's a star).

Assuming you manage to get the portals working and don't make a habit of putting the input right in the core you can run a great many ships off of it for a great while. And unless you've figured out high-acceleration and not pancaking your crew at the same time, you won't be putting your portal inputs anywhere near the core.

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