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I would blow Dane Cook
Dec 26, 2008

Papa Emeritus III posted:

^^ Oh drat. I'll have to dig for the already aired episodes


Not just video, but Kelly also had photos. The girl in the video had gone to the police, so there was a warrant out. Kelly was caught in Florida(the warrant was from Chicago) and when they detained him they found the photos in a gym bag. Somehow, that search was illegal due to no search warrant, and the charges were tossed.

When I was arrested, in FL, all of my poo poo was searched. I dont know if things had changed over the years but... wtf

Should be able to watch it on the lifetime website.

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Drunk Nerds
Jan 25, 2011

Just close your eyes
Fun Shoe
Obligatory post of Remix to Ignition with an anti-masturbation ASL vid:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5F_yghhiss

Milo and POTUS
Sep 3, 2017

I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?

935 posted:

Is it true that there's literal video evidence of R Kelly pissing on an underage girl and somehow he's not a convicted felon? How goddamn bad of a prosecutor do you have to be to fumble that ball.

EDIT - :lol: found not guilty after less than a day of deliberation following a trial where the judge "fell" and broke both his legs

They're almost qualified to have a cable news show

get me HQ!
Jul 28, 2010

Aziz... spark that shit nigga
trapped in the closet is my poo poo

the PPPPAckage

Mukulu
Jul 14, 2006

Stop. Drop. Shut 'em down open up shop.

get me HQ! posted:

trapped in the closet is my poo poo

the PPPPAckage

Where are you Chuck?

Seven Hundred Bee
Nov 1, 2006

Fun fact I learned from this show: r Kelly was illiterate

Blast of Confetti
Apr 21, 2008

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Papa Emeritus III posted:

^^ Oh drat. I'll have to dig for the already aired episodes


Not just video, but Kelly also had photos. The girl in the video had gone to the police, so there was a warrant out. Kelly was caught in Florida(the warrant was from Chicago) and when they detained him they found the photos in a gym bag. Somehow, that search was illegal due to no search warrant, and the charges were tossed.

When I was arrested, in FL, all of my poo poo was searched. I dont know if things had changed over the years but... wtf

guilty of not being rich enough to get away with it

Bust Rodd
Oct 21, 2008

by VideoGames
The Root or some other huge magazine also published a massive expose this year on the mansion full of teenage sex slaves he keeps. The parents can’t legally do anything because the girls aren’t being held against their will, supposedly, but he also gets them all phones so he can GPS track them at all times. Dude is a loving psychopath.

That said:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIQn8pab8Vc

Zzulu
May 15, 2009

(▰˘v˘▰)

935 posted:

Is it true that there's literal video evidence of R Kelly pissing on an underage girl and somehow he's not a convicted felon?

Yes and I have seen it because I couldn't believe it was real. It's hard to tell her age because the quality of the video is so poo poo. But it's basically a lot of awkward sex stuff with R Kelly telling her to do things then he pisses on her

Collapsing Farts
Jun 29, 2018

💀
Obviously these teenagers want to gently caress their idol but it's so insanely gross of R Kelly to exploit their idiot teenage brains

Mr. Bones
Jan 2, 2011

ain't no law says a skeleton can't play the blues
That's how it goes at an R Kelly party
I sip Cris...
YOU drink piss

GORILLA BASTARD
Jun 20, 2005

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

Bust Rodd posted:

The Root or some other huge magazine also published a massive expose this year on the mansion full of teenage sex slaves he keeps. The parents can’t legally do anything because the girls aren’t being held against their will, supposedly, but he also gets them all phones so he can GPS track them at all times. Dude is a loving psychopath.

That said:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIQn8pab8Vc

Such a nice song for a psychopath.

Honky Dong Country
Feb 11, 2015

Zzulu posted:

Yes and I have seen it because I couldn't believe it was real. It's hard to tell her age because the quality of the video is so poo poo. But it's basically a lot of awkward sex stuff with R Kelly telling her to do things then he pisses on her

Why would you seek out what you knew was very likely a child porn video?

Edmund Sparkler
Jul 4, 2003
For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Papa Emeritus III posted:

I shall also forever hate him for coining the genre "Hip-Hopera"

Did he coin it before this?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Rn7ugha7L0


(Bounty Killer is hella problematic)

Edmund Sparkler
Jul 4, 2003
For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

Honky Dong Country posted:

Why would you seek out what you knew was very likely a child porn video?

Because the more people who see it, the more real his crime becomes in the public's mind?

The police and DA already hosed up. They're not going to do poo poo about it. As long as you're not going to jack off to it, what's the problem?

People saw the Rodney King beating and got outraged. If you hide evidence of crimes, change will never happen.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

Hairy Busey
Jan 5, 2019

by FactsAreUseless

Meredith Baxter-Burnout posted:

Because the more people who see it, the more real his crime becomes in the public's mind?

The police and DA already hosed up. They're not going to do poo poo about it. As long as you're not going to jack off to it, what's the problem?

People saw the Rodney King beating and got outraged. If you hide evidence of crimes, change will never happen.

:thunk:

Honky Dong Country
Feb 11, 2015

Meredith Baxter-Burnout posted:

Because the more people who see it, the more real his crime becomes in the public's mind?

The police and DA already hosed up. They're not going to do poo poo about it. As long as you're not going to jack off to it, what's the problem?

People saw the Rodney King beating and got outraged. If you hide evidence of crimes, change will never happen.

Dude, it's child porn. Do you really think it's okay to watch child porn as long as you're not touching your genitals?

Slow-Scan Shep
Jul 11, 2001

you gotta admit the irony of doing time for possessing the r. kelly piss tape when he will not be doing time for loving making it is pretty drat amazing

Hairy Busey
Jan 5, 2019

by FactsAreUseless
It's also bullshit when they hide the names of rape victims. People need a name and face so the reality of rape can truly sink home

Trillhouse
Dec 31, 2000

https://twitter.com/RickyRawls/status/1081019296397099008

This documentary blatantly slanders barbershops and I will not stand for it.

Edmund Sparkler
Jul 4, 2003
For twelve years, you have been asking: Who is John Galt? This is John Galt speaking. I am the man who loves his life. I am the man who does not sacrifice his love or his values. I am the man who has deprived you of victims and thus has destroyed your world, and if you wish to know why you are peris

You people have a lot of growing up to do.

Honky Dong Country
Feb 11, 2015

Meredith Baxter-Burnout posted:

You people have a lot of growing up to do.

You're defending the act of watching child porn. Like come on dude, really?

HugeGrossBurrito
Mar 20, 2018
If you have to watch child porn to know that R Kelly is a rapist something is seriously loving wrong with you.

loving disgusting

Hairy Busey
Jan 5, 2019

by FactsAreUseless
Even though we haven't seen it, the piss tape is real

no pubes yet sorry
Sep 11, 2003

that video was distributed blurred out on tabloid websites at the time iirc.

ArchNemesis
Jun 27, 2007
College Slice
consider this: if you were caught with the r-kelly sex/pee tape, I'm sure the phrase "r kelly having sex with and urinating on a minor" would have to appear at least a few times in court documents... wouldn't that raise some eyebrows

An Ounce of Gold
Jul 13, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Wasn't it the Chicago police department that actually leaked the video? I assumed R Kelly never got in trouble because otherwise they would have to bust the police for distributing child pornography.

Either that or you can just pay the cops to diddle minors.

An Ounce of Gold fucked around with this message at 22:49 on Jan 5, 2019

no pubes yet sorry
Sep 11, 2003

heh

https://www.theguardian.com/music/2008/jun/16/news.rosieswash1

R Kelley Piss Tape Trial posted:


Tuesday May 13 - Day 2:
Three people are chosen as the jury selection begins. Officials receive complaints that the courtroom smells of urine, and the judge orders Frebreeze to be sprayed.

Nigmaetcetera
Nov 17, 2004

borkborkborkmorkmorkmork-gabbalooins
Pick convinced me this guy was no good. She didn’t convince me that wheedling your deedle and looking at pictures of pretty naked ladies is wrong, but keeping underage girls locked up in a compound is a different story.

Collapsing Farts
Jun 29, 2018

💀

no pubes yet sorry posted:

that video was distributed blurred out on tabloid websites at the time iirc.

Hm, does this mean that everyone who reads tabloids are now pedophiles? Disgusting

Jack-Off Lantern
Mar 2, 2012

*cranks it to the pisstape, but in an ironic fashion *

Hammerite
Mar 9, 2007

And you don't remember what I said here, either, but it was pompous and stupid.
Jade Ear Joe

papa_november posted:

you gotta admit the irony of doing time for possessing the r. kelly piss tape when he will not be doing time for loving making it is pretty drat amazing

Gaunab
Feb 13, 2012
LUFTHANSA YOU FUCKING DICKWEASEL
Dramatic shot of barrel that says "R. Kellys Urine" from Chappelle Show

Scrotum Modem
Sep 12, 2014


R. Smelly

Papa Emeritus III
Jul 7, 2017

[A MESSAGE FROM THE CLERGY]

Dat's Pussy Trap, bitch!

Deal with it.

Blast of Confetti posted:

guilty of not being rich enough to get away with it

Truth. :(

Meredith Baxter-Burnout posted:

Did he coin it before this?


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Rn7ugha7L0


(Bounty Killer is hella problematic)

Never saw this before but I...

Meredith Baxter-Burnout posted:

Because the more people who see it, the more real his crime becomes in the public's mind?

The police and DA already hosed up. They're not going to do poo poo about it. As long as you're not going to jack off to it, what's the problem?

People saw the Rodney King beating and got outraged. If you hide evidence of crimes, change will never happen.

.... :stare:

marijuanamancer
Sep 11, 2001

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
drip drip drip. this is the remix edition of a song about pissin

marijuanamancer
Sep 11, 2001

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
he's the world's greatest

marijuanamancer
Sep 11, 2001

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
at pissing

SERPUS
Mar 20, 2004
Dated a girl who liked being pissed on. At first, I would only do it in the shower after I was really well hydrated. Clear urine, more sterile. This was a regular thing, part of foreplay. Soon enough we graduated to vinyl bedsheets and "sex towels". This girl seriously could not get wet without... getting wet. One day she confessed that the best piss was dehydrated morning piss. The hot yellow vitamin-chocked stuff that stains the rim of your toilet bowl. I obliged. I drank three cans of Dr. Pepper before going to bed and really struggled to hold it all night. Cue eight in the morning, my alarm goes off and I feel her nudging me. I had a rock-solid morning wood, but I was able to pee anyways. I laid on my back and started pissing. Her head was on my chest, facing my dick with her mouth wide open. I remember feeling the hot piss dripping down my ribs and puddling in the small of my back, completely contained by the vinyl bedsheets. As soon as I was done peeing, she climbed up and rode me until she orgasmed twice. Afterwards, I got up and took a shower and got ready for work. She did the laundry. We stayed together another 4 months. Now someone else pisses on her.

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marijuanamancer
Sep 11, 2001

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
indeed

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