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drunkill
Sep 25, 2007

me @ ur posting
Fallen Rib
https://i.imgur.com/LIyvDtc.mp4
Welcome to the thread for the 2019 seasons of the Australian Football League and Australian Football League Women's; which are the national top-tier competitions of Australian Rules Football.

What is AFL?
This 5 minute video aimed at Americans should hopefully explain the basics: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XMZYZcoAcU0 <<<< watch this

Footy, as it is known to the masses, is a fast-paced, full contact, 360 degree game which takes place on a truly massive (and non-standard sized) field of turf with 18 players on both teams chasing a leather ball around the place which can lead to some big hits and some impressive displays of skills.
It is also one of the highest attended domestic sports league in the world with over 1 million paid up members (think seat/season pass holders) in Australia (Population 25 million) with many more spectators.
https://i.imgur.com/OOSZEAH.gifv


A brief history
It has existed in one form or another for over 160 years with the precursor to the national competition, the Victorian Football League (VFL) being established by eight Melbourne teams in 1897 as a breakaway of the previous competition the Victorian Football Association (VFA). Over the next century, a series of expansions, a relocation, a merger and a club withdrawal saw the leagues teams expand to the 18 teams there are today.

In 1990 the VFL changed its name to the Australian Football League to reflect the national competition it had become after South Melbourne became the first interstate team when they relocated to Sydney in 1982.

https://i.imgur.com/ajIwnfj.mp4

What the gently caress is going on?
The aim of the game is to win possession on the ball and kick it through the middle two set of big white sticks, which will earn you 6 points. If you kick it between the tall and the little post or the ball hits the goal post or is touched by any player going across the goal line it is worth 1 point.

At the start of every quarter (20 minutes + time on, usually 30m all up) and after a goal has been scored the ball is brought to the middle for a ball up/centre bounce where two ruckmen will try to tap the ball to the advantage of their teammates, think of a basketball jump ball.

The two main legal ways of moving the ball downfield is via kicking and handballing. If a player takes a mark (catch) at least 15m away from a kick which has not been touched by another player or has hit the ground an umpire awards a free kick, allowing the player to either play on or collect themselves for a few seconds to take an uninterrupted kick. Hand balling is punching the ball with a closed fist out of the palm of your other hand, players are not allowed to throw the ball and will have a free kick awarded against them if they do.

You can tackle an opponent if they have the ball but it must be between the shoulders and the knees. If successful and the opposing player was run down or had time to move the ball away but didn't you'll be rewarded with a free kick.

Oh yeah, you have to bounce the ball every 15 meters if you're running, being an oval ball it does not bounce quite like a basketball.

For more information read the general rules and composition of matches here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_rules_football#Laws_of_the_game

Some marks are more spectacular than others, so being Australian we obviously call them speccys or screamers. Yes, you can stand on peoples backs if you're legitimately going for the ball.
https://i.imgur.com/EkmYHeX.mp4

The structure of the competition which runs from March to September/October is thus: 18 teams, 23 rounds of football (including 2 byes for each team), the top 8 teams get to play in the finals. The top 4 teams on the ladder get a double chance to stay in if they lose in the first week, and everyone else does elimination finals from the get go. The final 2 teams play in the Grand Final for the Premiership held in the last weekend of September or the first weekend of October depending which week the season starts.

https://i.imgur.com/HQrI0gU.mp4

AFLW
The first season of the national women's competition kicked off in 2017 with 8 teams which are all aligned with the existing men's teams (see below). As of 2019 it has expanded to 10 teams and the 2020 season will see the introduction of 4 more expansion team to bring the total to 14.

It is a semi-professional competition running during the summer months with players only having 5 months long contracts and training in the evening after schooling or fulltime work, they aren't paid much either with the maximum player payment set between $13,400 and $24,600, compared to the men who are paid between $100,000-$1,300,000 per season.

The 2019 AFLW season kicks off this weekend (Feb 2nd) and runs for 7 weeks before a 2 week finals series consisting of four preliminary finals matches for the first time in the competitions history and then the Grand Final. However, unlike the first two seasons of the AFLW they have split the competition into two conferences of 5 teams who play everyone in their conference one and then 1 cross conference match to eliminate the need for bye weeks.

See the third post of the thread for AFLW season 2019 information.

https://i.imgur.com/RgY4KCz.mp4

drunkill fucked around with this message at 14:19 on Jan 29, 2019

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drunkill
Sep 25, 2007

me @ ur posting
Fallen Rib
The Teams:
I'm stealing the teamlist from last years OP because why not.


ADELAIDE CROWS
First AFL season: 1991
Premierships: 2 - 1997, 1998
Make fun of them about :
Not even bothering to turn up to the 2017 grand final. A 48 point loss was pretty poor against a side that probably won’t be remembered as one of the better premiership teams in history, especially when Adelaide had thrashed Geelong by 10 goals the week before.
Their fans insistence of Victorian conspiracy theories at every chance.
That nobody wants to live in Adelaide, but only when playing for the Crows.


BRISBANE LIONS
First AFL season: 1997 (merger of Fitzroy Lions and Brisbane Bears)
Premierships: 3 - 2001, 2002, 2003 (8 as Fitzroy - 1898, 1899, 1904, 1905, 1913, 1916, 1922, 1944)
Make fun of them about :
That nobody wants to live in Queensland, although that’s not so much weird as its basic common sense.
The very worst thing of all: being harmless. Even Luke Hodge feels sorry for them and its been scientifically proven he has no soul.


CARLTON BLUES
First VFL season: 1897 - foundation club
Premierships: 16 - 1906, 1907, 1908, 1914, 1915, 1938, 1945, 1947, 1968, 1970, 1972, 1979, 1981, 1982, 1987, 1995
Make fun of them about :
Thinking the coach was the problem in 2012.
Being unable to kick a score over 100 points at any point in the 2017 & 2018 seasons.


COLLINGWOOD MAGPIES
First VFL season: 1897 - foundation club
Premierships: 15 - 1902, 1903, 1910, 1917, 1919, 1927, 1928, 1929, 1930, 1935, 1936, 1953, 1958, 1990, 2010
Make fun of them about :
‘Biggest club in Australia’ they say, similar to how melanoma is the biggest cancer in Australia.
Giving a $2 million 4 year deal to Chris Mayne, which will never not be funny.
The constant lack of basic skills they displayed for most of 2017 kept their clown car crash of a season interesting for neutrals.
Collywobbles, making the grand final and loving tanking: Lost the 2018 grand final by 1 poor kick in the last 30 seconds.


ESSENDON BOMBERS
First VFL season: 1897 - foundation club
Premierships: 16 - 1897, 1901, 1911, 1912, 1923, 1924, 1942, 1946, 1949, 1950, 1962, 1965, 1984, 1985, 1993, 2000
Make fun of them about :
Running a club sanctioned performance enhancing injection program in 2012.
Having 34 players banned from playing in the 2016 season due to the drugs saga.
Their fans insistence that the club is still a powerhouse despite the glaringly obvious evidence to the contrary.
Picking up Jake ‘cheats on his pregnant missus with a schoolgirl’ Stringer from the Doggies.


FREMANTLE DOCKERS
First AFL season: 1995
Premierships: none
Make fun of them about :
Picking up perennial gently caress up Harley Bennell from Gold Coast.
Harley Bennell’s tattoo.
Trusting Ross Lyon, a man known for his ‘blood out of a stone’ approach to list management, to rebuild their list.
Losing 3 games by over 100 points in 2017, including back to back 104 point losses.
Cam McCarthy’s haircut and mustache combo.


GEELONG CATS
First VFL season: 1897 - foundation club
Premierships: 9 - 1925, 1931, 1937, 1951, 1952, 1963, 2007, 2009, 2011
Make fun of them about :
Being a walking midfield with the depth of a kiddie pool.
Being blown out of the park in the first quarter of the prelim against Adelaide.
Losing to Collingwood, Gold Coast and Essendon in consecutive weeks.
Tom Hawkins surprise at finding out you can’t punch other players in the face.


GOLD COAST SUNS
First AFL season: 2011
Premierships: none
Make fun of them about :
Bizarrely enough, being the first group of fans who decided to start booing Adam Goodes in 2015.
Having the most aggressively bland club logo and colour scheme. Beige would have more character than what they put together.
Their general air of irrelevance.
Coughing up pick 2 to trade a fringe 50-game player just because he won’t want to move somewhere else.


GREATER WESTERN SYDNEY (GWS) GIANTS
First AFL season: 2012
Premierships: none
Make fun of them about :
Being openly run by lizard-brained vampires, as opposed to other clubs which are only secretly run by lizard-brained vampires.
Their club colours and jumper have all the charisma of an off brand cereal package.
Drafting a bunch of fuckwits.
Toby Greene being inevitably charged with some heinous thing on or off the field at some point only for the club to stand by him and talk about what a good bloke he is. [see Below for Toby Green Kung Fu]


HAWTHORN HAWKS
First AFL season: 1925
Premierships: 13 - 1961, 1971, 1976, 1978, 1983, 1986, 1988, 1989, 1991, 2008, 2013, 2014, 2015
Make fun of them about :
Being the mustache twirling Bond villains of the league for the last decade.
Their horrendous club colours.
Paying through the nose to pick up Jaeger ‘The Albatross’ O’Meara from Gold Coast.
The Ty Vickery experiment didn’t last long with him retiring early, but we can still get some good jabs in if we hurry.


MELBOURNE DEMONS
First VFL season: 1897 - foundation club
Premierships: 10 - 1900, 1926, 1939, 1940, 1941, 1948, 1955, 1956, 1957, 1959, 1960, 1964
Make fun of them about :
Their womens team missing out on making the final by 2 goals.
Their mens team missing out on making the finals by 2 goals.
Being the worst team of the modern era, the same era which has seen 2 new expansion clubs created from scratch.
Once losing a game by 186 points, then following that up two seasons later with a 146 point losing margin.
Now trying to add ‘dirtiest team in the league’ to their repertoire (picking up Jordan Lewis was a success!).


NORTH MELBOURNE KANGAROOS
First VFL season: 1925
Premierships: 4 - 1975, 1977, 1996, 1999
Make fun of them about :
Their coach’s legendary level of whinging.
Their general air of irrelevance, like that weird loner at the bus station who talks loudly about how much of a badass he is despite the fact he clearly still lives with his mum at the age of 40.
The fact their best player literally looks like Sideshow Bob.


PORT ADELAIDE POWER
First AFL season: 1997
Premierships: 1 – 2004
Make fun of them about :
Fans who keep getting banned from games for hurling racist abuse at players.
Their president’s outspoken ‘everybody’s fault but mine’ philosophy.
If their ‘kid in a candy shop’ recruiting spree backfires horrendously, then that too.
The fact that a lot of them are actually proud to represent the bogans of Adelaide. Just imagine.
They still have Jimmy Toumpas on their list.


RICHMOND TIGERS
First VFL season: 1908
Premierships: 11 - 1920, 1921, 1932, 1934, 1943, 1967, 1969, 1973, 1974, 1980, 2017
Make fun of them about :
Man, this topic used to be never ending. Most 9th place finishes than any other club in the last 30 years. Having lost 3 games in a row by a goal or less TWICE in the space of 5 years. Their history of horrific drafting blunders. Finally making the finals in 2012 after a string of 9th finishes only to lose after being in front at 3QTR time to a side that actually finished 9th that year but were granted a spot after Essendon were banned from competing in the post-season. I mean I could go on, but *checks record book* 2017 Premiers, Richmond Tigers. Huh.


ST KILDA SAINTS
First VFL season: 1897 - foundation club
Premierships: 1 – 1966
Make fun of them about :
Making a big old step backwards in 2017, especially compared to the sides around them in development.
Picking a captain who wouldn’t make it in most club’s best 22 – man up and give it to Jack Stevens, or at least give co-captaincy for Jack Stevens and Jack Steven’s mullet (RIP).
Tim Membrey’s Jimmy Buffet wallpaper tattoos.
Winning a wooden spoon (last place finish on the ladder) approximately once in every 4 years of their existence.


SYDNEY SWANS
First VFL season: 1897 - foundation club (as South Melbourne)
Premierships: 5 - 1909, 1918, 1933, 2005, 2012
Make fun of them about :
Their soft players. Can’t even take a punch to the jaw while looking away, what wusses.
Losing the first 6 games straight.
Finishing the year with a wet fart of a performance in the finals after looking like the form side of the competition in September.


WEST COAST EAGLES
First VFL season: 1987
Premierships: 3 4 - 1992, 1994, 2006, 2018
Make fun of them about :
The fact a not small amount of their premiership team from a decade ago enjoyed the nose candy a bit too much.
making GBS threads the bed last time they made the Grand Final in 2015.
Winning one of the all-time great elimination finals against Port Adelaide before getting blown off the park the next week against the Giants.
Their constant home ground umpiring advantage and their fans insistence it’s not true and the umpires are in fact screwing the Eagles even when they win the free kicks 24-10.


WESTERN BULLDOGS
First VFL season: 1925
Premierships: 2 – 1954, 2016
Make fun of them about :
After winning the premiership from 7th on the ladder in 2016, their 2017 tactic of trying to win it from 10th backfired horribly.
Trying to fix their forward line problems with Travis Cloke.
Tom Liberatore’s raging premiership hangover.



Tipping
Join the goon tipping squad!

If you're new or got purged the link is thus:
http://www.footytips.com.au/comps/SASTips
pw: goons

:siren: Reminder, AFLW tipping begins this Saturday! :siren:


I'm not Australian and I want to watch this crazy sport
Cool, other than illegal streams, the best bet would be burchasing a WatchAFL pass. This is only for international audiences (or those with a VPN for Australians) and has every game of the season shown live or on demand.
https://www.watchafl.com.au/

If you buy an international membership [example] from a club you will support that team financially and receive a goodie bag of membership items along with a WatchAFL subscription.

For Australians, if Channel 7 isn't showing enough footy for you or you hate ads, you can sign up for Kayo and stream every game live or on demand. Sadly you're supporting murdoch at the same time if you do.

Links
What is AFL? - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XMZYZcoAcU0
http://www.afl.com.au/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_rules_football
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_Football_League
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women%27s_Australian_rules_football
https://australianfootball.com/
https://www.watchafl.com.au/

Last years thread, which I stole a bunch of things from the OP, thanks snaeksikn: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3845962

https://i.imgur.com/zrVWE5c.mp4
(Toby Greene ^)

drunkill fucked around with this message at 14:11 on Jan 29, 2019

drunkill
Sep 25, 2007

me @ ur posting
Fallen Rib
Differences/rules reminder for aflw vs afl:
  • 16 a side on field instead of 18.
  • 21 in a squad instead of 22; 6 on the bench (extra bench because of the heat) + 2 emergencies
  • New rule: last touch out of bounds rule but only between the two 50m arc results in a free kick instead of a throw in.
  • New rule: 5-6-5 zones before each centre bounce (instead of the new 6-6-6 for AFL this season)
  • New rule: Throw ins are 10m in from the boundary to cut down on secondary stoppages and congestion along the boundary line.
  • 4x 15m quarters, with time on only in the last two minutes of each quarter (yes its dumb but it is slightly longer than just 15m quarters in season 1 & 2)
  • Runners and water carriers are still allowed on the ground during play due to heat and the women needing extra instructions at this time. Both to be banned from the men's competition this year.


AFLW Kicks off this weekend! Games will be streamed on 7Plus (free), AFLW app (free), Foxtel Go (needs subscription) and Kayo (cheap subscription). While 2 games per week will be shown on Channel 7 as a double header and the other three games shown on Foxtel.

----


Yell at me if I forgot anything.

drunkill fucked around with this message at 08:34 on Feb 2, 2019

NTRabbit
Aug 15, 2012

i wear this armour to protect myself from the histrionics of hysterical women

bitches




Looking forward to someone finally having enough of his cheap sniping and face kicking bullshit and running through Toby Greene so hard he completes a mid air 540 and wakes up in Jacobean Scotland

Also go Crows

Nutsngum
Oct 9, 2004

I don't think it's nice, you laughing.

NTRabbit posted:

Looking forward to someone finally having enough of his cheap sniping and face kicking bullshit and running through Toby Greene so hard he completes a mid air 540 and wakes up in Jacobean Scotland

Also go Crows

Ah the "Ballantyne defence".

ewe2
Jul 1, 2009

Let's make it the best wooden spoon ever, Saints!

edit: We need our own awards, for example, the Toby Greene Memorial Arsehole Cup, awarded to the dirtiest player of the season.

ewe2 fucked around with this message at 21:06 on Jan 29, 2019

Solemn Sloth
Jul 11, 2015

Baby you can shout at me,
But you can't need my eyes.
I have mixed feelings about this AFLW season. Obviously I want us to win, but it would also be pretty rough on Daisy for us to miss out on the grand final by percentage two years running and then do it when she's having Daisy Junior.

Nutsngum
Oct 9, 2004

I don't think it's nice, you laughing.

Solemn Sloth posted:

I have mixed feelings about this AFLW season. Obviously I want us to win, but it would also be pretty rough on Daisy for us to miss out on the grand final by percentage two years running and then do it when she's having Daisy Junior.

Does it crush your soul that Melbourne has been denied the opportunity to add another glorious ALFX trophy to the premiership trophy cabinet?

Solemn Sloth
Jul 11, 2015

Baby you can shout at me,
But you can't need my eyes.

Nutsngum posted:

Does it crush your soul that Melbourne has been denied the opportunity to add another glorious ALFX trophy to the premiership trophy cabinet?

Nope because to me it means we are still reigning premiers

strap on revenge
Apr 8, 2011

that's my thing that i say
love too watch the football

MysticalMachineGun
Apr 5, 2005

Starting the petition right here to replace the wooden spoon with the wooden championship belt

MysticalMachineGun
Apr 5, 2005

NTRabbit posted:

Also go Crows

Chairchucker
Nov 14, 2006

to ride eternal, shiny and chrome

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2022




Yeah go Crows IMO

The Deadly Hume
May 26, 2004

Let's get a little crazy. Let's have some fun.
I'm pretty amazed no clubs changed their logos this year.

On that note are there any bad new alt/clash jumpers?

snoremac
Jul 27, 2012

I LOVE SEEING DEAD BABIES ON 𝕏, THE EVERYTHING APP. IT'S WORTH IT FOR THE FOLLOWING TAB.
I still hate Richmond’s new “yellow” stripe that looks like green poo.

The Deadly Hume
May 26, 2004

Let's get a little crazy. Let's have some fun.
Yeah so I have been looking into that.

So basically:

Norf look like they're reviving the late 90s roo as an alt for their 150th.

Carlton are ditching the laundry disaster clash strip and going back to white for that.

Port are going with silver for their clash (which they wore last year in last year's Bizarroball) and it looks alright with the vees.

Hawthorn have rid us of a lot of comedy by not doing white clash strips anymore (though I presume we're still going to have the brown away one - really if we're going to do that it should be the Maybloom vee version rather than stripes)

You Am I
May 20, 2001

Me @ your poasting

"I want to see the Crows and Hawks lose. See them thrashed before me. And to hear the lamentations (or shitposting) of their supporters"
                                                 /

Schneider Inside Her
Aug 6, 2009

Please bitches. If nothing else I am a gentleman
I for one hope that the Dockers kick some goals this year

Largepotato
Jan 18, 2007

Spurd.

quote:

They still have had Jimmy Toumpas on their list.

Toumpas was finally delisted at the end of last season.

gabensraum
Sep 16, 2003


LOAD "NICE!",8,1
Great videos. Blues for the flag. Heard it here first.

cmndstab
May 20, 2006

Huge Internet Celebrity!
Hooray football :unsmith: AFLW starts in like three days, I'm super excited :3:

I wanna see Erin Phillips kicking miracle goals again

snaeksikn
Feb 28, 2010

:qq::qq::qq::qq::qq::qq::qq:
Tale of 2018
After Richmond finally got their poo poo together to become the dominant footballing force of 2017 resulting in a commanding defeat of the Adelaide Crows in the Grand Final, the footballing public weren’t too sure what 2018 would bring. Would the Tigers, up to that point perennially mediocre performers, prove they have permanently changed their ways with their 2017 premiership, or would 3 decades of history prove too difficult to resist? Would Adelaide be able to launch a repeat assault on the premiership, only to withstand the pressure of a Grand Final this time? Would the Bulldogs, the young surprise packet premiers of 2016, bounce back from a disappointing following year to get themselves back into contention? Would the Giants’ overwhelming promise of their elite talent finally get the results the football world had long feared?

First third of the season

At round 8 into the home and away season and Richmond had cemented their place as the season’s team to beat, with only a loss to Adelaide in Adelaide in round 2 blemishing their record, and an impressive percentage holding them in front of the pack. West Coast surprised many to sit equal with Richmond at this point, albeit with a healthy if less dominant percentage keeping them in second place. West Coast had crashed out of the finals the previous year with a second round humiliation at the hands of GWS, but the return of their talismanic ruckman Nic Naitanui from an ACL injury in round 2 had seen them undefeated in that period. Adelaide were in touch with the ladder leaders in 4th place with 5 wins, only percentage behind the 3rd placed Geelong who had traded aggressively to prime for a premiership tilt. Also on the 5 win logjam were the Demons, hoping to erase the pain of missing the 2017 finals by the smallest of possible margins in living memory, with regular finalists Hawthorn, Sydney, and Port also in contention. GWS, North Melbourne, Fremantle, Collingwood and the Bulldogs sat on 4 win records at that point, Fremantle raising a few eyebrows given their state of rebuild and heavy amount of youth. However, like the similarly placed Bulldogs, their wins had come over poor sides and they had a losing record against quality opponents. GWS, having primed themselves for a premiership tilt, were not content with a 50% win rate, particularly as they also saw a draw with the lowly Saints.

Further down the ladder the Gold Coast had battled to a solid 3 wins, given they couldn’t even play any matches at their own home town due to the Commonwealth Games and were being given a pretty spectacular lack of support from the AFL to help them out with this dilemma. Essendon had promised their fans a climb back up the ladder with some optimistic trading for ready made players but had crashed to 6 losses and 2 wins to start the year, an apparent reversal of their usual ‘start the year on fire before falling apart at the half way mark’ strategy that the club had become synonymous with. St Kilda were also dealing out some sour vibes to their fan base as a 1 win, 6 loss, 1 draw record pointing towards a wasted rebuild and poor development of high draft pick talent. Carlton’s current rebuild was not going all that much better, recording only 1 win for the year, and somehow looking like a worse side than the ladder’s cellar dwellers the Brisbane Lions, who despite not having won a game to date, weren’t playing all that bad.

Second third of the season

At round 16 the ladder saw a little more separation between sides as those sides looking to stake their claim on a premiership were starting to make their run and look at priming themselves for a prized top 4 finish before the finals. Richmond carried on their merry way, sitting a game clear on top of the ladder with the best percentage in the league. Like the US political landscape, the general public were feeling deeply uncomfortable with a former reliable punchline now being a dominant force, and saw a lot of teeth gnashing about how this new world order was clearly a sick prank from the universe.
The real surprise packet of the year had made itself known at this point however, and the injury riddled and under pressure Collingwood had gone on an undefeated tear over this period to sit second on the ladder, with West Coast only separated from them in third position by a minor percentage differential. The Eagles for their part, had gone on a 10 game winning streak from rounds 2-11 and Andrew Gaff was establishing a Brownlow worthy season to help solve the club’s long problem with a dearth of A-Grade midfielders to compliment their elite key positional talent. Port Adelaide were also sitting in 4th position with a win/loss record matching the Magpies and Eagles, with Ken Hinkley’s coaching appearing to again find the message it had promised early in his tenure.
Sydney sat clear on 5th spot, almost a formality for the Swans as they had barely missed the finals in the past 15 years. The Demons were sitting in 6th, having crept into, then slid out of the top 4 halfway through the year, but a strong percentage was giving them enough breathing room from the more dramatic musical chairs occurring between the middle cluster of sides on the ladder. The young Demons were proving themselves as reliable winners through the season after more than a decade in the finals wilderness and multiple rebuilds, but questions remained on their inability to beat quality opponents. Geelong had the same record as Melbourne, but the outlook was less positive. The Cats elite upper talent was too good to be sitting 7th on the ladder and concerns about the clubs depth was ringing true, particularly with Geelong’s penchant for losing games to poorly performing opponents at unfortunate times.

And of course, just when you thought it was safe to go back to the finals, loving Hawthorn were sitting in loving 8th because the pricks just refuse to go away and die like every football fan wishes they loving would. Tom Mitchell (a classic Hawthorn trade) was sitting as Brownlow favourite with his Dane Swan-esque ball magnet style. A 9-6 record saw them equal with the ‘you guys are doing tanking wrong’ Kangaroos but ahead on percentage. GWS were struggling to improve on their earlier record in the year, sitting outside the 8 with 8 wins, and struggling to get their best team on the park through injury and suspension, and even seeing their ladder position go from 6th to 10th in the space of a single round due to the performances of teams around them. Adelaide were struggling to replicate a dominant 2017 home and away season, listlessly floating at 11th with a 7-8 record, and the media were proving a strong distraction with constant off-field murmurings. Essendon had recovered from their disastrous start but were still sitting a long way off challenging for a top 8 spot, but maintained a glimmer of hope from their 12th position. Fremantle’s youth and inexperience finally caught up to them as they fell to 13th, although most fans were happy with their 6 win record at that point of the year. The bottom 6 were less content with life, the Saints and Bulldogs both bitterly disappointed with how their years were panning out despite their pre-season hopes. Brisbane had climbed off their winless start to take 3 scalps, lifting them off the bottom of the ladder and even passing Gold Coast on percentage, who had failed to notch a win since round 5. Carlton were stinking up the bottom of the ladder with 1 win and 14 losses, and the worst percentage in the league. After a 4 win season in 2017, Blues fans were justifiably irate, although most other fans hate the Blues and all things told, couldn’t have happened to many nicer clubs.

Final third of the season

Well, there was certainly a lot of moves made in the final straight heading to the finals. Richmond and Carlton stayed book-ending the ladder, and West Coast and Collingwood consolidated their top 4 positions for a 2nd and 3rd place finish respectively. West Coast had seen Naitanui go down with another ACL, and Brownlow fancy Andrew Gaff had ended his year early with a bizarre incident where he shattered Fremantle youngster Andrew Brayshaw’s jaw with an off the ball hit that shocked the AFL. Losing these 2 critical players had many seeing West Coast as being unable to beat the clear dominant side of the year in Richmond, and the injury riddled and over-achieving Collingwood were not seen as likely contenders to defeat the Tigers either. Hawthorn went on a late season tear to snatch a top 4 spot from the Demons and GWS, who both dropped critical games in the last several rounds to allow the Hawks in. The Dees however weren’t upset at a 5th place finish, securing their first finals berth in 12 years (!) with a victory over West Coast in Perth in round 22 which also gave them a handy win over the quality opponent they were looking for as some finals credentials. GWS were less happy though, they had seen themselves drop from 3rd place in round 20 to 7th when the home and away season ended 3 rounds later. They were left to rue an inability to get their best team on the park, exacerbated by key forward Jeremy Cameron nearly turning young Lions defender Harris Andrews into a vegetable for life and missing a number of subsequent key games for the Giants.

Sydney finished 6th spot, unable to secure a top 4 position (even going from 4th in r18 to 9th the next round due to ladder musical chairs), age appearing to catch up with a number of their stars but their strong internal system allowed them to still finish 14-8. Geelong were cursing their inconsistency with an 8th place finish, having set themselves for a top 4 spot in the pre-season. The second best percentage in the league showed a side who could put on dominant victories but was prone to losing close games they shouldn’t.

Outside the top 8, the rest of the league finished their years and looked to move on. The Kangaroos had every reason to aim for a bottom 4 finish but instead sat a win outside the 8 at the end of the year, having done well with a pretty ordinary list, for no apparent benefit other than to make things better to watch for their few fans. Port Adelaide had crashed dramatically, going from 4th position 2/3rds of the way through the season to miss the finals completely. Difficult questions were being asked at the Power how a side could implode so badly at such a critical time in the season. Essendon was a case of too little too late, 12 wins with an ordinary percentage not enough to sneak into the top 8 like it is most years. Adelaide found themselves in the same boat with the same record as the Roos, Port and Essendon, it was a wasted year for the Crows on the back of a high amount of promise from the season before. The Bulldogs and Fremantle finished 13th and 14th with the same record, Fremantle quite happy with an 8 win season in a rebuild and showing a good base of young talent to give fans hope, while the Bulldogs were forced to confront what their real identity might be, after missing the finals for consecutive years after their surprise 2016 premiership. The Lions finished the year happy with themselves with a 5 win season, their exciting style of play winning a number of neutral fans over. The Saints finished 16th with 4 wins and draw, watching what were the similarly paced Demons go on to challenge for the top 4 for most of the year while the Saints sat at the opposite end of the ladder. Gold Coast’s year couldn’t end fast enough, winning only 1 game between round 6 and 23. Both co-captains were traded away from the club at their request and the Suns face 2019 in crisis mode with almost none of the elite expansion club talent left on the list and an inability to play winning football or establish a club identity. Carlton finished the year with 2 wins, a rotten year from a rotten side, more wooden spoons for the wooden spoon throne.

The Finals

The finals series threw some interesting narratives at fans, but the key one was simple: the bloody Tigers are going to go back to back, aren’t they? Richmond stood head and shoulders above every other side through the season and looked to continue that into the finals. In the opening final against the 4th placed Hawthorn, the Tigers easily accounted for the Hawks to run out 5 goal winners. The next night, the up and coming Demons faced off against the highly rated Cats, with Melbourne taking most of the game to secure their ascendency in an inaccurate game which ended with a surprised Geelong in a rare first round finals exit, and the Demon hype train kicking into gear amongst the public.

In Sydney, cross town rivals GWS and the Swans took each other in what ended up being a bit of a flogging, as the Giants made the Swans look every bit as old and tired as naysayers had been whispering about during the season as Sydney’s year ended in a whimper. In Perth, West Coast and Collingwood played out a pulsating game with the Eagles running out late winners. Curiously, not any of the round one finals saw any team kick more goals than behinds.

The semi-finals kicked off with Hawthorn looking to bounce back against the resurgent Melbourne, but the young Demons quickly put the Hawks to bed with a fast starting first quarter lead they never relinquished. The Hawks’ year was ended with a straight sets top 4 exit, and the Demons even spread of young elite talent and Brownlow favourite ruckman Max Gawn saw the media hype explode. The next week they would fly to Perth to face West Coast, where they had beaten the Eagles at their own home ground in consecutive years.

At the MCG, an inaccurate Collingwood battled away against an exhausted GWS, the Magpies running out 10 point winners, having conveniently kicked 10 more behinds than the Giants. Collingwood’s charmed year continued and they were through to a prelim, and the question was always how long they could hold out against their considerable injury list.

The preliminary finals kicked off in Melbourne, with Collingwood staging one of the great football ambushes to brutally seize ascendency from a stunned Richmond outfit, putting the previously impervious Tigers to the sword in a dominant first quarter. The Tigers had no answer for a Collingwood side that refused to adhere to the narrative of the season that everybody else was just here to be beaten by Richmond. Collingwood had slain the giant of 2018 with a career making performance from Mason Cox, and they were through to the Grand Final.

In Perth, West Coast staged an ambush of their own. Privately annoyed at their traditional home ground dominance being repeatedly denied by Melbourne in recent years, the Eagles enacted relentless revenge on the overwhelmed Demons. The Dees found themselves bullied out of the game, unable to put a goal on the board until halfway through the match by which time the Eagles had put on 10 of their own. The fairytale had crashed to a halt and the Eagles imperiously booked their ticket to the Grand Final.

The Grand Final

It was an interesting lead up to the Grand Final. Most of the football public had expected to see at least Richmond in the final game of the year, so seeing Collingwood, a side who nearly sacked their coach a year earlier and had appeared to squander away a premiership winning list over the last 8 years were heading into the Grand Final with a makeshift backline and barely settled forward line, with very little appearing to compliment their elite midfield and ruck.

West Coast for their part, were missing their talismanic ruck Nic Naitanui, a player who had proven to be such an critical X factor for the big West Australian club over his career, as well as Andrew Gaff’s elite midfield output. Without Naitanui and Gaff in the side, West Coast’s midfield looked pedestrian. High performing system defender Brad Sheppard was also missing after doing his hamstring earlier in the finals series, an underrated player who’s strong aerial support would be missed against a Collingwood side with a 7 foot tall key forward. The side had always had high quality key defenders and key forwards, so it was almost a case of watching 2 opposite lists line up against each other.

Unfortunately, most of this fascination was lost on the general public as it also saw 2 of the most utterly insufferable supporter bases going up against each other. In NFL terms, this was like the leadup to the Patriots vs Philadelphia Superbowl, in that everyone wearing either of the clubs colours in the crowd was almost certainly just, the loving worst. Like that Superbowl however, what resulted was an absolute classic.

The game kicked off with the traditional cauldron buzz of the MCG on Grand Final day. Collingwood were sharp early, putting on the first 5 goals of the game for a 29 point lead. West Coast looked shocked and sluggish, but 2 goals before the first quarter siren put the Eagles on the board. The second quarter settled into an arm wrestle with barely a score made by either side for most of the quarter. Collingwood got back out to a 23 point lead before West coast kicked another 2 goals in quick succession to end the quarter.

At half time Collingwood had a 2 goal lead and a more even performance. West Coast’s Luke Shuey had played his heart out to keep his side in the game along with strong showings from key defenders Jeremy McGovern and Tom Barrass, but a number of Eagles star players were having horror games. Collingwood for their part were far for evenly performed, with Taylor Adams grunt work through the middle and Tom Langdon’s driving run and kicking from half back standing out. Mason Cox, the hero a week before, was struggling against West Coast’s elite big men.

The third quarter saw the arm wrestle continue, but West Coast recovered some ground and were able to draw the scores level, off the back of some big performances from players who up to that point had been struggling. Collingwood failed to help themselves when their runner got in the way of play resulting in a West Coast goal. Heading into the final quarter, scores were level.

Fourth quarter, a bunch of poo poo happened, but basically: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ETtQTZmXsp4

Solemn Sloth
Jul 11, 2015

Baby you can shout at me,
But you can't need my eyes.
Good write up, only qualm is you mixed up our finals, it was the one against Geelong that we went 5-0 in the first and basically stayed at that distance, hawthorn was more of a grind with help from their inaccuracy

mactheknife
Jul 20, 2004

THE JOLLY CANDY-LIKE BUTTON
Wait - an international membership comes with a WatchAFL sub? Collingwood's page doesn't say that at all. Hot drat.

drunkill
Sep 25, 2007

me @ ur posting
Fallen Rib
Well in that case it might not. You might want to email the club for clarification.

I think Freo and Carlton had the cheapest International memberships which included watchafl. Still a bit more than just a straight up subscription but you get a bit extra back, plus some money goes to the club instead of just the afl.

gabensraum
Sep 16, 2003


LOAD "NICE!",8,1
Will Kayo do footy? Because it has been bloody great for the cricket and I'll keep that over WatchAFL this time if so.

MysticalMachineGun
Apr 5, 2005

You Am I posted:

"I want to see the Crows and Hawks lose. See them thrashed before me. And to hear the lamentations (or shitposting) of their supporters"


Wow, never lump us in with Hawks supporters again, so offended over here

thepokey
Jul 20, 2004

Let me start off with a basket of chips. Then move on to the pollo asado taco.

gabensraum posted:

Will Kayo do footy? Because it has been bloody great for the cricket and I'll keep that over WatchAFL this time if so.

It does yeah. What’s the quality been like? I like the idea, but loathe the idea of giving Rupert any of my money and for that alone I don’t think I could

NPR Journalizard
Feb 14, 2008

snaeksikn posted:


Fourth quarter, a bunch of poo poo happened, but basically: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ETtQTZmXsp4

Never get tired of watching this.

I think it should be mentioned just how little faith a lot of eagles supporters had in Dom Sheeds kicking ability as well. He would be well down the list of the person you would want to have the ball in that position.

drunkill
Sep 25, 2007

me @ ur posting
Fallen Rib

thepokey posted:

It does yeah. What’s the quality been like? I like the idea, but loathe the idea of giving Rupert any of my money and for that alone I don’t think I could

Yeah not a fan of hiving rupert money but it has profiles like netflix. So I've got my dads login details as he ditched foxtel for kayo.

Works fine but watchung wbbl games they dont do post match stuff, just cuts to ads a minute after the match had ended. That might just be cricket though.

Bigfooty has a $5 for February kayo sign up link in the AFLW subforum, so you can try it iut cheap and get the furst half of the aflw season coverage.

You'll need half decent internet though, prob minimum of 20mbps I imagine.

And yeah kayo has all afl and aflw games this season as well as all if the 2018 season too. Plus all the foxfooty shows like 360 etc apparently.

Goons that want it should pool together in groups of four and split the bill and screw murdoch out of full profits.

MysticalMachineGun
Apr 5, 2005

drunkill posted:

Goons that want it should pool together in groups of four and split the bill and screw murdoch out of full profits.

Hot drat this is a good idea. Can you be logged in to all four profiles at once on four devices?

harperdc
Jul 24, 2007

drunkill posted:

Well in that case it might not. You might want to email the club for clarification.

I think Freo and Carlton had the cheapest International memberships which included watchafl. Still a bit more than just a straight up subscription but you get a bit extra back, plus some money goes to the club instead of just the afl.

Absolutely depends on the club. Some didn’t even offer an International Membership preciously; some might just offer it as a token way for expats to keep their membership rights rolling over. Others (like the Saints) have the “proper” membership which provides the basic member kit, and the WatchAFL login for the year.

[Edit] I believe that WatchAFL tacitly allows two simultaneous logins from different devices (to allow you to split) but that was as of last year. I have friends up here who do that, usually our club president saves the login at our sponsor bar as well.

harperdc fucked around with this message at 07:14 on Jan 31, 2019

drunkill
Sep 25, 2007

me @ ur posting
Fallen Rib
Round 1 AFLW teams are in: https://womens.afl/news/15786/aflw-teams-giants-speedster-races-into-history-books

North is so stacked, I'm sure they'll have to give up a few players next season if they make it to the GF first time round.

MysticalMachineGun posted:

Hot drat this is a good idea. Can you be logged in to all four profiles at once on four devices?
Ah, checking the site while logged out says the basic package only lets you watch on 2 screens at the same time, premium package is 3 screens. So not as good as I thought it was (4)

Here is the bigfooty promo for kayo, $5 for feburary then it rolls onto the basic $25 plan after that. Offer ends feb 4th.
https://kayosports.com.au/?irgwc=1&...oucher=FEBFIVER

Or there is the 14 day trial anyway but you still need to supply your CC info. Still, if you decide to split an account with someone else that is $12 a month, not too badand you can cancel anytime (when the footy season is over)

cmndstab
May 20, 2006

Huge Internet Celebrity!
The Crows' Irish import, Ailish Considine, is going to debut :3:

Hope she has a blinder!

harperdc
Jul 24, 2007

I should check and see if any of the USAFL girls have caught on with AFLW teams. I know there's a few at the VFLW and equivalent levels now, it's only a matter of time before they get even higher up.

Azza Bamboo
Apr 7, 2018


THUNDERDOME LOSER 2021
Never watched this game before but I picked my favourite animal of the lot.

Come on SWANS.

Also read that they once got themselves into the final after starting a season down 0-6?!

thepokey
Jul 20, 2004

Let me start off with a basket of chips. Then move on to the pollo asado taco.

drunkill posted:

You'll need half decent internet though, prob minimum of 20mbps I imagine.

Well, that would be me out then :negative:

harperdc
Jul 24, 2007

Azza Bamboo posted:

Also read that they once got themselves into the final after starting a season down 0-6?!

They finished the regular season 14-8, 6th place, and lost in the second round of the playoffs.

It’s not as funny as 2016, when North Melbourne started 9-0 for the first time ever then finished 3-10.

Nutsngum
Oct 9, 2004

I don't think it's nice, you laughing.

drunkill posted:

Round 1 AFLW teams are in: https://womens.afl/news/15786/aflw-teams-giants-speedster-races-into-history-books

North is so stacked, I'm sure they'll have to give up a few players next season if they make it to the GF first time round.

Ah, checking the site while logged out says the basic package only lets you watch on 2 screens at the same time, premium package is 3 screens. So not as good as I thought it was (4)

Here is the bigfooty promo for kayo, $5 for feburary then it rolls onto the basic $25 plan after that. Offer ends feb 4th.
https://kayosports.com.au/?irgwc=1&...oucher=FEBFIVER

Or there is the 14 day trial anyway but you still need to supply your CC info. Still, if you decide to split an account with someone else that is $12 a month, not too badand you can cancel anytime (when the footy season is over)

Does Kayo allow you match replays and the fox footy programs? WatchAFL does so im kind of leaning on keeping that going.

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PONEYBOY
Jul 31, 2013

I think it does for a brief period after the match, certainly it does for Serie A games and surfing tournaments. Can’t say for footy programs tho’.

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