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Zil
Jun 4, 2011

Satanically Summoned Citrus


That person is a wizard, you can't convince me otherwise.

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Eikre
May 2, 2009
Basically, instead of passing the plug under the furniture to pass through the loop, he passed the loop under the furniture be passed through by the plug.

Sefal
Nov 8, 2011
Fun Shoe
Magic.

That was magic!

Weatherman
Jul 30, 2003

WARBLEKLONK

The Fool posted:

wtf did I just see

:aaaaa: but in cord form

The Fool
Oct 16, 2003


300 and change tickets came in yesterday.

We turned on attachment scanning in o365, and set the notification email to go to the help desk.
The notification emails have the original attachment on them.
The help desk then sends out ticket notifications, which also include any attachments.
Which then gets scanned, generating new notifications.
Repeat ad nauseum.

That Dang Lizard
Jul 13, 2016

what; an idiomt

The Fool posted:

300 and change tickets came in yesterday.

We turned on attachment scanning in o365, and set the notification email to go to the help desk.
The notification emails have the original attachment on them.
The help desk then sends out ticket notifications, which also include any attachments.
Which then gets scanned, generating new notifications.
Repeat ad nauseum.

I've done something similar in the past; I had ClamAV milter using Yara rules that match on a string, which generates a notification email which also contains that string... ended up sending ~20,000 emails to myself and my boss (10k each) in the span of about 30 minutes before I noticed and pulled the plug. Luckily the rate-limiting stopped it from going properly exponential and it was to internal recipients only so we didn't get our email blackholed.

Boss was quite annoyed since the flood of emails caused his mobile to hard lock repeatedly until he got his inbox cleaned out.

Renegret
May 26, 2007

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
https://twitter.com/MSFT365Status/status/1152221671425748992

cage-free egghead
Mar 8, 2004
For whatever reason I have users on one specific floor that are experiencing those issues while the rest of the company is fine :iiam:

Sickening
Jul 16, 2007

Black summer was the best summer.

cage-free egghead posted:

For whatever reason I have users on one specific floor that are experiencing those issues while the rest of the company is fine :iiam:

Services are just degraded and sporadic. Hit or miss. It sucks but it’s also not that big of a deal.

Renegret
May 26, 2007

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Sickening posted:

Services are just degraded and sporadic. Hit or miss. It sucks but it’s also not that big of a deal.

I'm fine.

My coworker, on the same network who sits right next to me, is not.

Sickening
Jul 16, 2007

Black summer was the best summer.

Renegret posted:

I'm fine.

My coworker, on the same network who sits right next to me, is not.

That is what we are seeing too. Although it just cleared up for us about 10 minutes ago. It was random who had issues.

Our skype voicemails were completely down for all throughout though.

Renegret
May 26, 2007

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
The worst part is that I'm sending time sensitive emails, then immediately calling them because, did you get my email????

It feels so dirty

stevewm
May 10, 2005

Renegret posted:

The worst part is that I'm sending time sensitive emails, then immediately calling them because, did you get my email????

It feels so dirty

You are one of THOSE PEOPLE!

The guy I share an office with has done this for years. For some reason it bugs me to no end. He will often beat the email's arrival with the phone call he always makes. Sometimes I think he is already dialing while hitting the send button.

GnarlyCharlie4u
Sep 23, 2007

I have an unhealthy obsession with motorcycles.

Proof
on the flip side of that coin. I like it because 1) it's documented what you need and 2) if it's actually an urgent request then I'm glad you've alerted me to it as soon as possible.

But if you emailed me something that is clearly not urgent or maybe urgent but not important then EVEN BETTER! because I get to keep you on the line while I S L O W L Y read your whole email.
Then once I'm done, and while I've got you on the phone, I get to take the next half hour explaining the Eisenhower Decision Matrix and where your request falls on that priority scale.



If you haven't hung up on me by now, I'll start explaining that because you've taken so much of my time with your request already, it's really not fair to those who fall higher on the priority list and all of those requests have been pushed back that much farther. At that point I'll carefully explain that since this request has jumped the priority queue, and it's already wasted an hour or so of time, that I have to escalate the issue and account for the time lost, which means conferencing in either my boss, or your boss, or both. Then once I've conferenced in either or both bosses, I get to explain AGAIN the Eisenhower Decision matrix and how the request at hand fits into it. Once everyone is clear on how I came to conclude where the request falls on the priority list, I will have my boss advise both parties what the proper protocol is for submitting a request and why it is so important to adhere to the standards and practices that we have worked so hard to develop.

If you've gotten to this point then holy poo poo, gently caress you for wasting so much of everyone's time. I'm documenting the whole thing and running it all the way up the drat chain, filing a complaint, and showing up to the disciplinary HR meeting that I've pushed so hard for. And you better PRAY that your manager shows up because if not then we get to do this all over again.

Unless I don't feel like it... Then I'll just say, "sorry wrong number".

SyNack Sassimov
May 4, 2006

Let the robot win.
            --Captain James T. Vader


Renegret posted:

The worst part is that I'm sending time sensitive emails, then immediately calling them because, did you get my email????

It feels so dirty

It's Friday morning you're allowed to pretend to be an executive for a while.

GreenNight
Feb 19, 2006
Turning the light on the darkest places, you and I know we got to face this now. We got to face this now.

Power has been out to the entire building. Everyone went home except for IT because we have to be here when the power is restored. When is the power coming back? Who knows!

Renegret
May 26, 2007

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

stevewm posted:

You are one of THOSE PEOPLE!

I'M SORRYYYYYY

But it was so important it couldn't wait. It was an escalation from a government agency for an outage so I needed a response immediately. Any the guy was in a meeting!

Sickening
Jul 16, 2007

Black summer was the best summer.
The best part of o365 outages? You can spot gigantic idiots praising on prem when they happen. Reddit is a honey pot for them right now.

I ran an exchange server for 10 years without any downtime.....

Yeah okay, of course you did.

stevewm
May 10, 2005

GreenNight posted:

Power has been out to the entire building. Everyone went home except for IT because we have to be here when the power is restored. When is the power coming back? Who knows!

Been there, done that... Sat in one of the outdoor furniture displays and fell asleep. Our "data center" used to be at one of our retail store locations.



Renegret posted:

I'M SORRYYYYYY

But it was so important it couldn't wait. It was an escalation from a government agency for an outage so I needed a response immediately. Any the guy was in a meeting!

I guess you are excused then.

SyNack Sassimov
May 4, 2006

Let the robot win.
            --Captain James T. Vader


A new phone came in. And while I'm overjoyed at having something that doesn't take three seconds to launch an app, I have a decision to make. Should I continue to use the long-deprecated, no longer patched, and 2004-era-graphic-design Touchdown for work email, or should I join the 2010s?

My general problem is that I have a lot of folders (yeah I still do the folder/rules thing sorry if you're inbox zero but it just doesn't work for my brain), and the last time I tried it, Outlook Mobile STILL didn't sync subfolders on its own - you had to click on the folder to see if there were new messages in there. Whereas Touchdown, as ancient and decrepit as it is, would show me new messages from all folders without fail. (Also I spent $20 on it in like 2011 so I mean I gotta get my money's worth that's an expensive app!)

Are there any Exchange Android clients that will reliably sync folders? Or has Outlook Mobile been fixed so it will? What do you guys use for mobile mail?

rafikki
Mar 8, 2008

I see what you did there. (It's pretty easy, since ducks have a field of vision spanning 340 degrees.)

~SMcD


Super Soaker Party! posted:

A new phone came in. And while I'm overjoyed at having something that doesn't take three seconds to launch an app, I have a decision to make. Should I continue to use the long-deprecated, no longer patched, and 2004-era-graphic-design Touchdown for work email, or should I join the 2010s?

My general problem is that I have a lot of folders (yeah I still do the folder/rules thing sorry if you're inbox zero but it just doesn't work for my brain), and the last time I tried it, Outlook Mobile STILL didn't sync subfolders on its own - you had to click on the folder to see if there were new messages in there. Whereas Touchdown, as ancient and decrepit as it is, would show me new messages from all folders without fail. (Also I spent $20 on it in like 2011 so I mean I gotta get my money's worth that's an expensive app!)

Are there any Exchange Android clients that will reliably sync folders? Or has Outlook Mobile been fixed so it will? What do you guys use for mobile mail?

I use Nine, it works great for me. You can be selective about which folders to sync or just do all of them.

Inspector_666
Oct 7, 2003

benny with the good hair

rafikki posted:

I use Nine, it works great for me. You can be selective about which folders to sync or just do all of them.

I have no firsthand experience with the folders but in ever other way Nine is like Touchdown but not from 1998, highly recommended.

Arquinsiel
Jun 1, 2006

"There is no such thing as society. There are individual men and women, and there are families. And no government can do anything except through people, and people must look to themselves first."

God Bless Margaret Thatcher
God Bless England
RIP My Iron Lady

Renegret posted:

The worst part is that I'm sending time sensitive emails, then immediately calling them because, did you get my email????

It feels so dirty
I was that guy today too, but it was because a third party was loging in via VPN from wherever above the Atlantic they were currently travelling at mach 23 and I really needed their internal contact to pull the finger out and confirm things for me while ensuring a paper trail.

SyNack Sassimov
May 4, 2006

Let the robot win.
            --Captain James T. Vader


rafikki posted:

I use Nine, it works great for me. You can be selective about which folders to sync or just do all of them.


Inspector_666 posted:

I have no firsthand experience with the folders but in ever other way Nine is like Touchdown but not from 1998, highly recommended.

I'd seen a lot of online reviews recommend this too, figured I'd get the viewpoint of people I trust more than random Internet weirdos (WHICH MEANS I DON'T NEED YOUR OPINION CLAM DOWN hey I gotta keep up the madposting or I might get the avatar revoked) so downloaded and set it up, and so far, yeah, does exactly what I need re folders and I'm liking the usability and graphics. It's real weird seeing work email not in the Android equivalent of a Pine window. (Before anyone thinks I'm that old I never actually used Pine as when I was coming up in the world we already had graphical email clients. That's right, Grandpa, Eudora supremacy, oh yeah and hooking it up to your Juno account? For free? Now we're on the Information Super Highway! 33.6 kbps USR modem, 75 bucks at CompUSA, that's pure speed right there!)

Anyway thanks guys, it's gonna hurt my pride to pay the $15 a mere 8 years after I bought my previous Android email client, but oh well. :10bux:

Agrikk
Oct 17, 2003

Take care with that! We have not fully ascertained its function, and the ticking is accelerating.

The Macaroni posted:

10 PRINT "TIM IS A PENIS HEAD": REPEAT 1000
20 GOTO 10


I think if you didn’t do this, or the other dumb or computer breaking things mentioned in this thread, you don’t belong in this thread.

I think one thing that sets computer touches apart from mere end users is our curiosity and our inability to Just Follow Directions when it comes to computers.

Read directions? Follow the lesson plan? Bleh. Let’s figure out how to turn the background of a friend’s computer a bright pink.

Methanar
Sep 26, 2013

by the sex ghost
code:
@echo off
color 2
:start
echo %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% %random% 
goto start

Was my loving-around tool of choice in a cmd window fullscreened.

Its less effective than it used to be because computers got too fast. 15 years ago the numbers were a bit more readable. Looks like windows 10 pauses the loop if you click anywhere in the window as well to highlight text

Methanar fucked around with this message at 21:56 on Jul 21, 2019

Arquinsiel
Jun 1, 2006

"There is no such thing as society. There are individual men and women, and there are families. And no government can do anything except through people, and people must look to themselves first."

God Bless Margaret Thatcher
God Bless England
RIP My Iron Lady
But will that lock up the machine and spawn processes so fast that it eventually runs out of memory and falls over?

RFC2324
Jun 7, 2012

http 418

my favorite was the dude that figured out he could use a rare earth magnet to make the entire network go insane somehow.

Sefal
Nov 8, 2011
Fun Shoe

Sickening posted:

The best part of o365 outages? You can spot gigantic idiots praising on prem when they happen. Reddit is a honey pot for them right now.

I ran an exchange server for 10 years without any downtime.....

Yeah okay, of course you did.

Please stop doxing my boss

iospace
Jan 19, 2038


The servers at my old job were on prem. Then again, it was health care stuff so it makes a lot more sense to remove a variable when it came to HIPAA stuff.

When I first started they were having cooling issues, so they went up to the cooling units and found the vents clogged with plant debris :v:

(gently caress that place otherwise)

Renegret
May 26, 2007

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

iospace posted:

When I first started they were having cooling issues, so they went up to the cooling units and found the vents clogged with plant debris :v:

One year we had an issue where the trees were pollinating more than a teenager on spring break. I don't know what changed or what made that season uncharacteristically pollony, but our poor maintenance people went from remote site to remote site cleaning HVAC intakes of pollen, only for them to get clogged the very next day. It's something like a 3:1 ratio of HVAC people to remote sites, so these guys were getting run ragged, going multiple times a day to a site that normally they'd only visit once a week.

I got one of the greatest meltdowns of my career when I called one of them to dispatch to a site to a place where he just was that morning after about two weeks of this. Nothing was getting done and the guys were being worked to the brink.

Renegret
May 26, 2007

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy
We have a new piece of equipment that, whenever it reboots, it sends a high temperature alert for 65535 degrees C.

It's great, because you can tell who in the NOC is paying attention. There are 3 kinds of people.

1) Those who forward the alert in all sincerity, thinking nothing's weird.

2) Those who read the alert and say, hmm something doesn't seem right, what with this router being 10x hotter than the sun and all. And, you know, 2^16.

3) Those who have paid attention to the conversation for the past 3 months and know that this is due to the device rebooting.



I'd even be satisfied with option 2, because at least it shows people are at least paying attention. But no. People paying attention here are few and far between.

Dirt Road Junglist
Oct 8, 2010

We will be cruel
And through our cruelty
They will know who we are

Renegret posted:

We have a new piece of equipment that, whenever it reboots, it sends a high temperature alert for 65535 degrees C.

It's great, because you can tell who in the NOC is paying attention. There are 3 kinds of people.

1) Those who forward the alert in all sincerity, thinking nothing's weird.

2) Those who read the alert and say, hmm something doesn't seem right, what with this router being 10x hotter than the sun and all. And, you know, 2^16.

3) Those who have paid attention to the conversation for the past 3 months and know that this is due to the device rebooting.



I'd even be satisfied with option 2, because at least it shows people are at least paying attention. But no. People paying attention here are few and far between.

Your NOC sounds like my NOC

AlexDeGruven
Jun 29, 2007

Watch me pull my dongle out of this tiny box


Dirt Road Junglist posted:

Your NOC sounds like my NOC

Same

A particular NOC Guy posted:

Hey, this alert went off, can you check on it?

me posted:

Yup, this goes off periodically because <upstream vendor>'s FTP fails to respond. It will retry automatically in 10 minutes. If it keeps failing, I'll notify the vendor.

A particular NOC Guy 4 weeks later posted:

Hey, this alert went off, can you check it?

me posted:

Yep, as I said before, this goes off periodically when the vendor's FTP fails. It will retry in 10 minutes

A particular NOC Guy another 4 weeks later posted:

Hey, this alert went off...

Renegret
May 26, 2007

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Dirt Road Junglist posted:

Your NOC sounds like my NOC

I am the NOC :suicide:

If I don't catch and suppress the alerts fast enough, someone else will do the stupid, and make us all look bad. I work with a bunch of ingrates who are too afraid to make decisions, or don't realize we have the ability to.

The end result is clients who convince us to escalate CPE issues to our engineers because nobody knows how to say "no".

bonus points: one of my supervisors one who's allergic to the word "no". So I have to go out of my way to make sure he doesn't know what I'm doing, otherwise he butts in and forces me to do the stupid.

iospace
Jan 19, 2038


Renegret posted:

We have a new piece of equipment that, whenever it reboots, it sends a high temperature alert for 65535 degrees C.

It's great, because you can tell who in the NOC is paying attention. There are 3 kinds of people.

1) Those who forward the alert in all sincerity, thinking nothing's weird.

2) Those who read the alert and say, hmm something doesn't seem right, what with this router being 10x hotter than the sun and all. And, you know, 2^16.

3) Those who have paid attention to the conversation for the past 3 months and know that this is due to the device rebooting.



I'd even be satisfied with option 2, because at least it shows people are at least paying attention. But no. People paying attention here are few and far between.

The fact that they set the starting max temp to -1 instead of you know, ZERO, makes me cringe.

Actually wait, that's probably what happened:

What's happening is this: The max temp is stored in a 16 bit register. 0xFFFF is -1 in signed integer math (I've abused this before, it's fun). Ok, that's not as bad upon further reflection. It's unlikely that the highest recorded temp will be in the negatives, and setting it as an impossibly low value is par for course with max recorded value registers. Whoever wrote the "check the temp register" IS ASSUMING IT'S UNSIGNED INSTEAD OF SIGNED.

WHY

iospace fucked around with this message at 16:32 on Jul 22, 2019

Renegret
May 26, 2007

THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*


Cat Army Sworn Enemy

iospace posted:

The fact that they set the starting max temp to -1 instead of you know, ZERO, makes me cringe.

Actually wait, that's probably what happened:

What's happening is this: The max temp is stored in a 16 bit register. 0xFFFF is -1 in signed integer math. Whoever wrote the "check the temp register" IS ASSUMING IT'S UNSIGNED INSTEAD OF SIGNED.

WHY

Cisco

iospace
Jan 19, 2038



:ughh:

Inspector_666
Oct 7, 2003

benny with the good hair
Our AC unit in the server room is network enabled but it loving loved reporting impossible numbers for several different values via SNMP, so getting Zabbix tuned properly for it was fun.

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Dirt Road Junglist
Oct 8, 2010

We will be cruel
And through our cruelty
They will know who we are

Renegret posted:

I am the NOC :suicide:

If I don't catch and suppress the alerts fast enough, someone else will do the stupid, and make us all look bad. I work with a bunch of ingrates who are too afraid to make decisions, or don't realize we have the ability to.

The end result is clients who convince us to escalate CPE issues to our engineers because nobody knows how to say "no".

bonus points: one of my supervisors one who's allergic to the word "no". So I have to go out of my way to make sure he doesn't know what I'm doing, otherwise he butts in and forces me to do the stupid.

You're doing the lord's work, my dude.

Also, not convinced we don't work for the same company :yayclod: I have maybe 2 NOC guys I trust to actually interpret errors before forwarding them to Client Eng. We're also casual drinking buddies, which makes for some fun tap house visits after outages.

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