Register a SA Forums Account here!
JOINING THE SA FORUMS WILL REMOVE THIS BIG AD, THE ANNOYING UNDERLINED ADS, AND STUPID INTERSTITIAL ADS!!!

You can: log in, read the tech support FAQ, or request your lost password. This dumb message (and those ads) will appear on every screen until you register! Get rid of this crap by registering your own SA Forums Account and joining roughly 150,000 Goons, for the one-time price of $9.95! We charge money because it costs us money per month for bills, and since we don't believe in showing ads to our users, we try to make the money back through forum registrations.
 
  • Post
  • Reply
Zzr
Oct 6, 2016

eonwe posted:

im starting to think that star citizen isn't that good

I see that someone received his Dr. Smart payment.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

Dementropy
Aug 23, 2010





mp5
Jan 1, 2005

Stroke of luck!

Chris Roberts, architect

Jonny Shiloh
Mar 7, 2019
You 'orrible little man

Sarsapariller posted:

Alright with the weekly video release it's time for another

Inside Star Citizen Summary!

The post where I painstakingly descend into the cavernous maw of CIG's bullshit and bring back little nuggets of precious infotainment for you. Let's begin:

* Jared is talking, skip skip skip
* "<The new mechanic will> expand the current capabilities of our asteroids, plant life, and multi-tools, already in game." I can't believe they say this stuff without batting an eye.
* All the Citizens bitching about cave brightness got their way, caves are way loving dark now.
* Looks like you get the mining tool through some more exciting shopping and inventory management gameplay. Love it, love it.
* Ship mining and FPS mining are mutually exclusive, completely separate systems, that were definitely planned to be that way from the very start. Having two independent ways of doing the same thing, at different scales, and trying to balance both of them in the same economy is a very good idea and not at all a sign that they can't get spaceship stuff to work reliably.
* Step one of mining: scour the nearly-infinite surface of planets until you see a tiny pile of detailed rubble that denotes a cave. There are no HUD markers and the dev clearly just teleported his ship to one. No problems here.
* Step two: enter pitch black cave without breaking your ankles or having an exertion induced heart attack
* Step three: find a mineable rock in the pitch black cave. It looks like all the other rocks but it has small blue lines on it. There are no HUD markers. Looking great so far.
* Step four: just carry the loving rock out. Haha no, of course not. Laser it apart with a minigame and then individually grab each one into your hand, then select it in your hand and click 'Stow." We're cooking with gas now.
* Your rock inventory is digital and not represented on your person. That's a ridiculous idea. Who the gently caress ever thought we'd represent everything on your person?
* You can sell FPS mined rocks directly to the guy at the station. You do not need to refine them like you do with the big mining ship. In the video they sell for 10-15 credits per rock that you hand-picked from the ground. You would need to sell 500 hand-picked rocks to get the credits of a single space combat mission. You would need to sell something like 200,000 hand-picked rocks to earn a space ship.
* All of this is tier zero so you can't criticize it. Obviously we're going to keep developing this. It's definitely not going out the door as-is and then no dev or player will even acknowledge that it exists after the initial victory laps.
* other stuff:
* Caves have random poo poo just laying on the ground and you can harvest... plants? And sell them? This is "Exploration" gameplay. For every single instance he shows, the spaceman has to pick the fruit or item up into his hand and examine it in the exact same way. I would go insane within an hour.
* Now we're talking about the "Sounds of mining." I'm skipping all of this segment. Mining sounds exactly like you would expect.
* Oops that was it, show's over.

LOL. Fiddle fiddle *Rome burning intensifies*

trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy
Look nerds, you buy an extremely loving expensive flying chariot, in the year 2949, so that you can go pick rocks from holes in the ground by hand

Is perfectly logical

skeletors_condom
Jul 21, 2017

Yellow and black RP session. I believe this "content" is subscriber only. Even BoredGamer, a committed CIG shill/propgandist mentioned this particular "coincidence."

Dementropy
Aug 23, 2010



https://twitter.com/ProjectBaggins/status/1174826244132823041

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

Dementropy
Aug 23, 2010









The inevitable consequences of communication and open development.

Hav
Dec 11, 2009

Fun Shoe

They think it’s poo poo too.

Time_pants
Jun 25, 2012

Now sauntering to the ring, please welcome the lackadaisical style of the man who is always doing something...

Ramadu posted:

You'll regret feel ashamed of this your words and deeds when you learn recognize quiets secret!!!
Sorry. Have to preserve the fidelity of the original quote.

Grubby Hobo
Feb 13, 2018

There's something else about bears not many people know. If a bear gets hooked on the taste of crowdfunding, it becomes a man-killer. He'll go on a rampage and has to be destroyed. And that's why you should never hug a bear.
Should we have the Goon Awards for Star Citizen?

Best Imaginary Feature: 90% of Universe Populated By AI Indistinguishable from Citizens.
Best Excuse For Not Delivering Things: Building Amazing Pipelines To Deliver Things So Fast You Won't Believe It

Those were sort of easy, but Best Lie will be really hard.

skeletors_condom
Jul 21, 2017

Grubby Hobo posted:


Those were sort of easy, but Best Lie will be really hard.

This is sort of related to best imaginary feature, but maybe Crobo's statement about 10K users (or whatever it was) in a single instance would work. Or even the whole server meshing BS. None of that stuff (as presented by CIG) is even conceptually possible with current tech.

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

BumbleOne
Jul 1, 2018

by Fluffdaddy

Grubby Hobo posted:

Should we have the Goon Awards for Star Citizen?

Best Imaginary Feature: 90% of Universe Populated By AI Indistinguishable from Citizens.
Best Excuse For Not Delivering Things: Building Amazing Pipelines To Deliver Things So Fast You Won't Believe It

Those were sort of easy, but Best Lie will be really hard.

here are my nominees: “best picture“ (adz adama), “best director“ (rob crissert), “best actor“ (hobo lando), “best costume design“ (sandi), “best film editing“ (rexzilla), “best documentary feature“ (bootcha), “best makeup and hairstyling“ (that guy with the crazy combover)

BumbleOne fucked around with this message at 02:33 on Sep 20, 2019

Dogeh
Aug 30, 2017

ShitMeter: -------------|- 99%

skeletors_condom posted:

This is sort of related to best imaginary feature, but maybe Crobo's statement about 10K users (or whatever it was) in a single instance would work. Or even the whole server meshing BS. None of that stuff (as presented by CIG) is even conceptually possible with current tech.

Wait a goshdarned minute here.
Are you suggesting the magic Germans combined with the incredible server power of Amazon won't make it work?

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

Scruffpuff
Dec 23, 2015

Fidelity. Wait, was I'm working on again?

Grubby Hobo posted:

Should we have the Goon Awards for Star Citizen?

Best Imaginary Feature: 90% of Universe Populated By AI Indistinguishable from Citizens.
Best Excuse For Not Delivering Things: Building Amazing Pipelines To Deliver Things So Fast You Won't Believe It

Those were sort of easy, but Best Lie will be really hard.

Biggest Misunderstanding of Applied Technology: The Power in the Machines by Chris Roberts
Least Intelligent Statement: all statements made by Chris Roberts
Most Intelligence-Insulting Attempt to Cover for a Lie: The Missing Seat by Ben Lesnick
Most Obvious Lie: "The reason we have nothing to show of Squadron 42 is to avoid spoilers" by CIG
Longest Bout of Uncontrollable Laughter: Every game publisher Chris Roberts propositioned before settling on defrauding the general public

trucutru
Jul 9, 2003

by Fluffdaddy
I finished watching the dead stranding video and if I didn't know that it is a Kojima game I would be sure it is some sort of prank.

Like, SC has toilets and so on, but can you weaponize your turds? can you throw bloody pee grenades to get rid of the Vanduul? I dont think so

"The bloody urine is a particularly powerful weapon" :omarcomin:

Quavers
Feb 26, 2016

You clearly don't understand game development
Best On-Screen Murder Attempt: Box of Donuts, by Sandi Gardiner

1337 Pro-Gamer Award: Chris Roberts Plays Star Citizen, 2015

Zazz Razzamatazz
Apr 19, 2016

by sebmojo

Sarsapariller posted:

Alright with the weekly video release it's time for another

Inside Star Citizen Summary!

The post where I painstakingly descend into the cavernous maw of CIG's bullshit and bring back little nuggets of precious infotainment for you. Let's begin:

* Jared is talking, skip skip skip
* "<The new mechanic will> expand the current capabilities of our asteroids, plant life, and multi-tools, already in game." I can't believe they say this stuff without batting an eye.
* All the Citizens bitching about cave brightness got their way, caves are way loving dark now.
* Looks like you get the mining tool through some more exciting shopping and inventory management gameplay. Love it, love it.
* Ship mining and FPS mining are mutually exclusive, completely separate systems, that were definitely planned to be that way from the very start. Having two independent ways of doing the same thing, at different scales, and trying to balance both of them in the same economy is a very good idea and not at all a sign that they can't get spaceship stuff to work reliably.
* Step one of mining: scour the nearly-infinite surface of planets until you see a tiny pile of detailed rubble that denotes a cave. There are no HUD markers and the dev clearly just teleported his ship to one. No problems here.
* Step two: enter pitch black cave without breaking your ankles or having an exertion induced heart attack
* Step three: find a mineable rock in the pitch black cave. It looks like all the other rocks but it has small blue lines on it. There are no HUD markers. Looking great so far.
* Step four: just carry the loving rock out. Haha no, of course not. Laser it apart with a minigame and then individually grab each one into your hand, then select it in your hand and click 'Stow." We're cooking with gas now.
* Your rock inventory is digital and not represented on your person. That's a ridiculous idea. Who the gently caress ever thought we'd represent everything on your person?
* You can sell FPS mined rocks directly to the guy at the station. You do not need to refine them like you do with the big mining ship. In the video they sell for 10-15 credits per rock that you hand-picked from the ground. You would need to sell 500 hand-picked rocks to get the credits of a single space combat mission. You would need to sell something like 200,000 hand-picked rocks to earn a space ship.
* All of this is tier zero so you can't criticize it. Obviously we're going to keep developing this. It's definitely not going out the door as-is and then no dev or player will even acknowledge that it exists after the initial victory laps.
* other stuff:
* Caves have random poo poo just laying on the ground and you can harvest... plants? And sell them? This is "Exploration" gameplay. For every single instance he shows, the spaceman has to pick the fruit or item up into his hand and examine it in the exact same way. I would go insane within an hour.
* Now we're talking about the "Sounds of mining." I'm skipping all of this segment. Mining sounds exactly like you would expect.
* Oops that was it, show's over.

Thank you for posting these so I don't have to waste my time watching them.

no_recall
Aug 17, 2015

Lipstick Apathy

Hav posted:

Bootcha hinted at a $100K budget for the Pax Australia 'skit' they did where the dread pirate Strangli is brought to justice by the Robert's boys and a couple of bikers.

Skepticism has been expressed as to this nosebleedingly high number given the quality of said cosplay and it's actual lifespan.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWLVI_mnn2I&t=143s

Share and Enjoy.

Edit: Chris is the Tina Belcher of taut delivery.

That sounds like Rex. Somewhat.

Zazz Razzamatazz
Apr 19, 2016

by sebmojo

I will confess that I've never made it all the way through a shillmunchalot post...

Zazz Razzamatazz
Apr 19, 2016

by sebmojo

mp5 posted:

Chris Roberts, architect

He is kind of like the architect in that Matrix film. Boring, pretentious, confusing, and drags down the whole endeavor.

Jobbo_Fett
Mar 7, 2014

Slava Ukrayini

Clapping Larry

Bumble He posted:

here are my nominees: “best picture“ (adz adama), “best director“ (rob crissert), “best actor“ (hobo lando), “best costume design“ (sandi), “best film editing“ (rexzilla), “best documentary feature“ (bootcha), “best makeup and hairstyling“ (that guy with the crazy combover)

Where the gently caress is my "Key Grip" credit you bastard!?

Zazz Razzamatazz
Apr 19, 2016

by sebmojo

Jobbo_Fett posted:

Where the gently caress is my "Key Grip" credit you bastard!?

"Key Grip" (Grabby Hands)

SPERMCUBE.ORG
Nov 3, 2011

Space commies are th' biggest threat t' red-blooded American Freedom we got in th' future. So me and my boys got to talking over a few hot dogs the other day and this is what we came up with...

Jobbo_Fett posted:

Where the gently caress is my "Key Grip" credit you bastard!?

Just lol if you think you can outgrip Sandi.
Besides by the time we reach the credits they'll be able to add a "Star Citizen is dedicated in loving memory to the backers." You'll be a skeleton in the ground, my friend.

his nibs
Feb 27, 2016

:kayak:Welcome to the:kayak:
Dream Factory
:kayak:
Grimey Drawer
Star Citizen: Got mine, where's ores?

his nibs
Feb 27, 2016

:kayak:Welcome to the:kayak:
Dream Factory
:kayak:
Grimey Drawer
in fairness, sunk cost galaxy will never be beaten imo

Agony Aunt
Apr 17, 2018

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

CR told people to stop buying ships?

LOL.

Ok guys, your god has spoken. Stop buying ships.

One does not go against the word of god.

Zaphod42
Sep 13, 2012

If there's anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.

Quavers posted:

Well done Goons! Stage 7 is complete: "Jesus patch" is now amongst the Citizens' upvoted CrobertsVision™ terminology. And they're even now accepting that the next Jesus Patch is weeks not months away :v:

Bless us Roberts, for we have pledged.

Our Jesus Patch, who art in CIG, hallowed be thy name

Thy persistent universe come, thy will be done, on the client as it is in the server

Give us this day our daily jpgs, and forgive us our refunds, as we forgive those who refund against us

But deliver us from goons, forever and ever. Amen.

Gosts
Jan 15, 2016


K8.0 posted:

Pretty soon they'll be selling these people jpegs of themselves being tortured and they'll still be buying.

Could someone please post the picture of the stimperial citizen holding a pain sphere? The one with all the labels pointing out parts of his anatomy?

stingtwo
Nov 16, 2012

Tippis posted:

Couldn't find it so I made my own…



You could add Windows 8, 8.1, the AMD Mantle api that CIG claimed at one point to be switching to. to that list as they have come and gone in the time of SC development.

Kosumo
Apr 9, 2016

Zaphod42 posted:

Bless us Roberts, for we have pledged.

Our Jesus Patch, who art in CIG, hallowed be thy name

Thy persistent universe come, thy will be done, on the client as it is in the server

Give us this day our daily jpgs, and forgive us our refunds, as we forgive those who refund against us

But deliver us from goons, forever and ever. Amen.


:five:

Hazamuth
May 9, 2007

the original bugsy

Zazz Razzamatazz posted:

I will confess that I've never made it all the way through a shillmunchalot post...

Same, my eyes just glaze over instantly and I wish I was dead

Taintrunner
Apr 10, 2017

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Relevant to this thread, but I found a 15 year podcast clip archive that is 95 minutes long coverring the development hell of Duke Nukem Forever. Here's the most relevant part: (@9:50)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBRpXrkgPEc&t=530s

It's incredible just how hard history can repeat itself.

Tippis
Mar 21, 2008

It's yet another day in the wasteland.

stingtwo posted:

You could add Windows 8, 8.1, the AMD Mantle api that CIG claimed at one point to be switching to. to that list as they have come and gone in the time of SC development.

Good idea. And DX11/12/Vulcan… maybe a couple of generations of VR/Headtracking setups as well — all things that was supposed to be the top-end latest and greatest of PC gaming.

e: Aaaand… updated.

Tippis fucked around with this message at 11:11 on Sep 20, 2019

Sandepande
Aug 19, 2018

What is this, a cult of (zero) personality? "The project is a loving disaster but it's OK cuz the main man likes to sign stuff and give taxi money - generously, of course, he's such a great guy - to folks staying too late."

I am feeling doubts about the veracity of S1r's ramblings.

Jobbo_Fett
Mar 7, 2014

Slava Ukrayini

Clapping Larry
Its like saying [insert actor name here] is amazing cause they agreed to sign my baseball cap after I give them $30 for the explicit purpose of having them sign my baseball cap.


Only difference is you multiply the cost by a factor of 10 to 1,000, depending on variables.

Adbot
ADBOT LOVES YOU

tuo
Jun 17, 2016

I made a thing

  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • Post
  • Reply