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If they are consenting adults who loving cares. I met Bruce Boxleitner at a con a few years ago. My now fiancé saw him too and was smitten. Saying he was really attractive. The dude was about 65 then and she 27. Same with Sean Bean and thinking his look in Game of Thrones was amazing. Old money and good looks goes a long way in keeping you attractive. Stop being weirdos about it.
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Oct 26, 2019 14:39
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I mean its a little funny because he starred in a movie 20 years ago that roasts him for being engaged to a 26 year old that makes jokes about how she's young enough to be his daughter. It does kind of speak to the culture of hollywood that values young women and discards them while men go on to have long careers. It's getting a little better but 20-30 year age gaps are fairly common for love interests and just create a vacuum of roles for not only middle aged women but younger men.
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Oct 26, 2019 14:56
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Bust Rodd posted:What does a 60 year old man get out of marrying a 26 year old woman?
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Oct 26, 2019 15:21
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Vintersorg posted:If they are consenting adults who loving cares. OK, no one is even bringing up sex here. We’re saying the power dynamics in an ONGOING RELATIONSHIP between two people with such a gap is weird, and the extra power in play comes from Dennis Quaid’s Hollywood career. If these were two suburbanites or whatever, it wouldn’t be a discussion here. That’s what would make this a weird thing to talk about. At the end of the day, yeah, they’re two consenting adults but it’s still a weird situation.
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Oct 26, 2019 15:28
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I guess what I'd push is we draw the line between unpacking power dynamics and becoming patronizing. In this specific case I also feel like it's worth noting that it's not like he's marrying some struggling actress. So, there's not this sense of trading power for a relationship. She's a PHD student who is already independently successful. And like look, I totally get that line of logic is a slippery slope. I think Rhyno probably had the right correction for my original post that this thread is designed around broader culture, but while I won't cosign on everything Joe posted, I think more context around this stuff is important. Because this is obviously different from Weinstein but also very different than Dane Cook or John K.
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Oct 26, 2019 16:58
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You also move into some real bizarre classist territory when you start to imply that it's problematic for people to marry across income brackets or whatever the hell.
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Oct 26, 2019 17:11
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Can Dennis Quaid even be considered powerful? Are we sure this woman even realizes that he was kind of famous at one point?
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Oct 26, 2019 17:33
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Mechafunkzilla posted:You also move into some real bizarre classist territory when you start to imply that it's problematic for people to marry across income brackets or whatever the hell. The poor shouldn't date the rich, they should eat them.
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Oct 26, 2019 17:37
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Papercut posted:Can Dennis Quaid even be considered powerful? Are we sure this woman even realizes that he was kind of famous at one point? Wonder if they hang out with Randy
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Oct 26, 2019 17:57
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Timeless Appeal posted:PHD student, independently successful. Pick one.
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Oct 26, 2019 19:12
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How does this thread reconcile its general concept while simultaneously denying that a 26 year old grown loving woman has the maturity, agency, and absolute right to marry whoever she wants? LOVE IS LOVE! (Unless I personally find it icky.)
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Oct 26, 2019 19:17
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AlternateAccount posted:How does this thread reconcile its general concept while simultaneously denying that a 26 year old grown loving woman has the maturity, agency, and absolute right to marry whoever she wants? I have no problem with her personal choices, it's Quaid who should be put on blast for this.
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Oct 26, 2019 20:17
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That's incoherent. Quaid should only be "put on blast" if he's taking advantage of a woman who apparently can't make decisions about her own life. Since you said you have no problem with her decisions, then what's the problem with Quaid?
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Oct 26, 2019 20:25
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Origami Dali posted:That's incoherent. Quaid should only be "put on blast" if he's taking advantage of a woman who apparently can't make decisions about her own life. Since you said you have no problem with her decisions, then what's the problem with Quaid? It's a bad look for him. How is that incoherent?
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Oct 26, 2019 20:38
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Dennis Quaid should go back to living the lonely life he deserves for that Parent Trap remake
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Oct 26, 2019 21:06
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I'm still waiting on that Innerspace sequel.
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Oct 26, 2019 21:07
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https://twitter.com/reuters/status/1184581028209410050?s=21
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Oct 26, 2019 21:23
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Rhyno posted:It's a bad look for him. How is that incoherent? It's incoherent because you seem to be trying to say that it is both fine and not fine at the same time, delineated along gender lines. It's either acceptable for two adults to marry of their own free will or it isn't, you can't say it's okay for one half of the relationship and not the other. And why the gently caress should 'look' to strangers factor into who a person chooses to marry if they love them? This whole thing just seems like a weirdly puritanical imposition of propriety on two random people for no other reason than to punish them for not conforming to your personal perception of what a relationship should be. It's honestly quite vile. Lovely Joe Stalin fucked around with this message at 21:32 on Oct 26, 2019 |
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Oct 26, 2019 21:25
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If their genders were reversed it would still look bad. She's free to make her own decisions but he looks like a creep for being a part of that decision.
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Oct 26, 2019 21:33
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Spotlight on the Weinstein brothers: Why Has Harvey Weinstein Come Out of Hiding? https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/why-is-harvey-weinstein-hiding-1249984 Harvey Weinstein’s Ex-Assistant Says He Told Her He ‘Liked Chinese Girls’ Before Assault https://www.huffpost.com/entry/harvey-weinstein-rowena-chiu-attempted-rape_n_5d9aecfee4b0fc935edcd907 Bob Weinstein Wants Back Into Hollywood. Here's Why Hollywood Shouldn't Let Him https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/bob-weinstein-wants-back-hollywood-here-s-why-hollywood-shouldn-t-let-him-1249685 Brad Pitt Compares Harvey Weinstein Scandal to Manson Murders https://www.etonline.com/brad-pitt-compares-harvey-weinstein-scandal-to-manson-murders-129510 Harvey Weinstein to Be Arraigned on New Indictment https://news.yahoo.com/harvey-weinstein-arraigned-indictment-201654722.html
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Oct 26, 2019 22:17
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Boywhiz88 posted:“Creepy as gently caress.” I think you’re misusing that. Hugh Hefner (collecting social security for the last fifteen years): You know, some of my future girlfriends haven't even been born yet. Hodgepodge posted:confuscius disapproved of such relationships, except in the case of being without a male heir It's in violation of that casual formula that some use: Age / 2 + 7 Another one is Diddy and Lori Harvey.
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Oct 26, 2019 22:20
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Zogo posted:It's in violation of that casual formula that some use: Age / 2 + 7 i'm not sure how expecting love to conform to a mathematical equasion could ever be a problem
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Oct 26, 2019 22:28
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Hodgepodge posted:i'm not sure how expecting love to conform to a mathematical equasion could ever be a problem I haven't really looked into that formula much at all. Apparently the notion has been around for a long time: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdnX-9YyKCM It seems that all societies have decided that love is based around numbers. IIRC something like 80% of current US marriages the husband is 0-9 years older than the wife.
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Oct 26, 2019 22:38
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I'm just making fun of the washed up cradle robber.
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Oct 26, 2019 22:44
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Sodomy Hussein posted:DiCaprio is rapidly becoming the new Jack Nicholson both in career and reputation. God bless him.
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Oct 26, 2019 22:58
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Something can be gross as gently caress and not technically illegal. Woody Allen marrying his own adopted daughter for one.
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Oct 26, 2019 22:59
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Zogo posted:I haven't really looked into that formula much at all. Apparently the notion has been around for a long time: i also see no problem with assuming the universality of the romantic rules of 1950s america also that 0-9 is doing a lot of work, the vast majority are simply similar in age, decreasing in likelihood as they diverge from the plurality of marriages in which both partners are the same age e: link https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_disparity_in_sexual_relationships#Statistics Hodgepodge fucked around with this message at 23:06 on Oct 26, 2019 |
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Oct 26, 2019 22:59
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Hodgepodge posted:i'm not sure how expecting love to conform to a mathematical equasion could ever be a problem think i heard a libertarian say this about age of consent laws once which isn't applicable to the dennis quaid thing but oof, this conversation is bringing out some weird thoughts in goons
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Oct 26, 2019 23:03
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Look, I think the following things are true: 1) It's kind of weird to be romantically involved with someone with a significant age difference. Not necessarily morally wrong, just on a gut level, it feels weird. Like in dating your cousin's cousin sort of way. 2) But like, we all kind of accept that it's fine to be sexually attracted to other adults no matter the age difference. You're not creepy if you're sixty and find someone who is twenty-six attractive. The reverse is also fine. 3) There are cases of people who were technically of the age of consent when they entered an adult relationship, but were basically being groomed as teenagers. So, you can't just shout AGE OF CONSENT and make all these relationships okay. 4) There are power dynamics that can come up in vast age differences that while they may make the relationship unethical, are worthy of reflection 5) Sixty year olds and twenty-five year olds are not aliens. Like age differences obviously create differences, but it's possible to interact with someone significantly older than you as a peer
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Oct 26, 2019 23:30
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Brother Entropy posted:oof, this conversation is bringing out some weird thoughts in goons Goons get weird when sexuality is brought up, sky blue, water wet, news at 11.
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Oct 26, 2019 23:39
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Hodgepodge posted:i also see no problem with assuming the universality of the romantic rules of 1950s america Yea, I can't say I'm a proponent of that equation at this point. Brother Entropy posted:think i heard a libertarian say this about age of consent laws once Libertarian/minarchist types who are against age laws can easily be painted into a very uncomfortable position. If they go the  route then they end up in a very precarious position because IIRC the youngest mother on record is like four years old.
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Oct 27, 2019 00:03
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Timeless Appeal posted:3) There are cases of people who were technically of the age of consent when they entered an adult relationship, but were basically being groomed as teenagers. So, you can't just shout AGE OF CONSENT and make all these relationships okay. This is the worst out of all those examples, because you could reasonably assume that the "appeal" (ugh) of the older party is imagining their technically legal boyfriend/girlfriend as being the age they were when they first met. They can look at them and see a young kid, even if they're legally an "adult". It's similar to those creepy parasocial relationships that fans of young actresses have, where they keep track of when the actress turns legal.
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Oct 27, 2019 00:19
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King Vidiot posted:This is the worst out of all those examples, because you could reasonably assume that the "appeal" (ugh) of the older party is imagining their technically legal boyfriend/girlfriend as being the age they were when they first met. They can look at them and see a young kid, even if they're legally an "adult". It's similar to those creepy parasocial relationships that fans of young actresses have, where they keep track of when the actress turns legal. I mean, a woman- and based on the weirdness around the stars of Supernatural it probably extends to men too- risks losing fans by coming out because their male fans will no longer be able to imagine themselves in a relationship with them. Although in the case of the Supernatural guys, their wives were harassed because they threaten the gay incest fantasy explicated in fan fiction. Which... I... umm... https://youtu.be/SlA9hmrC8DU
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Oct 27, 2019 00:28
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Timeless Appeal posted:5) Sixty year olds and twenty-five year olds are not aliens. Like age differences obviously create differences, but it's possible to interact with someone significantly older than you as a peer The worlds they grew up in are so different they might as well be seperate planets.
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Oct 27, 2019 02:34
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I’m 26 and many of my coworkers are in their 60s. I get along with them alright. I wouldn’t necessarily want to marry any of them, but that’s a personal preference.
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Oct 27, 2019 04:04
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LIVE AMMO COSPLAY posted:The worlds they grew up in are so different they might as well be seperate planets. While that is true, it's also not really a reasonable thing to say for why people can't be in a romantic relationship. Would you say two people from different countries can't marry? Or even two people from different parts of the US? Someone who grew up in the city and someone who is from a small nowhere town will have extremely different experiences in basically every part of their life. It's fine to say "I think it's creepy because he's old enough to be her grandfather" but I don't really like the idea of saying "People who are too different aren't allowed to be in love!"
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Oct 27, 2019 04:10
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I love how anyone is pretending this isn't mutually beneficial arrangement between these two people, even if unspoken.
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Oct 27, 2019 08:09
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Judakel posted:I love how anyone is pretending this isn't mutually beneficial arrangement between these two people, even if unspoken. Weinstein probably made some of his victims into stars too, I guess everybody wins?
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Oct 27, 2019 08:33
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LIVE AMMO COSPLAY posted:Weinstein probably made some of his victims into stars too, I guess everybody wins? You've jumped the shark when you're quite explicitly comparing Quaid to Weinstein.
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Oct 27, 2019 08:49
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Judakel posted:I love how anyone is pretending this isn't mutually beneficial arrangement between these two people, even if unspoken. Aren't most marriages mutually beneficial e.g. I love and want to spend my life with my partner and she feels the same way? Remember when someone posted about Thomas Middleditch bragging about bullying his wife into swinging after he got famous and somehow that was deemed inappropriate for the thread, but two adults getting married belongs here? And Jeff Goldblum (who also has a similar age difference with his partner, by the way) isn't handsy, he's "incredibly tactile". I guess being an internet-approved darling of the nerds has it's perks.
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Oct 27, 2019 12:12
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