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a PSA about staying in a poo poo marriage 'for your kid' Don't. ever.
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Nov 2, 2019 11:45
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| # ? Apr 24, 2024 01:03 |
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Also the mum is angry at her estranged daughter for not being emotionally effusive and talking at length about other stuff at her aunt's funeral. Of course the daughter is going to be a little terse and/or sad. But no, mum didn't get her tearful "I love you mum, everything you have ever said was right, I was wrong to DARE to take the Uni course I wanted to do instead of the one you had planned for me." moment, so she picks a fight at her own sisters funeral. Yes, she is the arsehole. No question.
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Nov 2, 2019 12:14
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Also no mention of how the daughter is struggling to find work with her "degree of little use." Fairly safe bet that daughter is doing quite well, and mom loving HATES that.
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Nov 2, 2019 12:23
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child, why aren't you grateful for the upbringing that i provided you? i demand that you grovel at my feet for it, forever
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Nov 2, 2019 12:41
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How’s A aw
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Nov 2, 2019 12:46
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edit: Whoops double post.
BrigadierSensible fucked around with this message at 14:54 on Nov 2, 2019 |
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Nov 2, 2019 12:49
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The lady in that post is going quite hard on how much she sacrificed to give this girl a good education, but is staying away from saying how she is paying for the daughter's college. Leads me to think she isn't. So what the gently caress did she sacrifice?
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Nov 2, 2019 16:41
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rotinaj posted:The lady in that post is going quite hard on how much she sacrificed to give this girl a good education, but is staying away from saying how she is paying for the daughter's college. Leads me to think she isn't. So what the gently caress did she sacrifice? THE BEST YEARS OF MY LIFE, YOU UNGRATEFUL DISAPPOINTMENT!!!!!!!!
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Nov 2, 2019 16:44
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"I made sacrifices and you should be grateful!" It's called being a parent and everyone does it, sweaty, there's nothing special about it. Most people don't get indignant about not being rewarded exactly how they think they're entitled to. This is a major problem I'm having with my own. She thinks there's specific rules to how our relationship is supposed to work, I'm supposed to act in a specific way and I don't so she resents me and assumes I hate her because I don't do 'what I'm supposed to'. Anything I do that isn't up to her specific standard is an intentional attack against her. Going on a date with my husband to an attraction instead of her means I don't like being around her and intentionally didn't invite her to send that message to her. Anything I do without her is a passive aggressive message that I want to hurt her. If I said that wasn't true, I'm just lying to make her look bad. If she asks me to do something together, it means I don't care about her and I'm only going for my own selfish reasons and not because I enjoy being around her. I just got so tired of never doing anything right so when the huge falling out happened last year, it was honestly a relief.
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Nov 2, 2019 17:19
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And here I thought kids always attend funerals to have tearful happy reunions with their estranged parents.
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Nov 2, 2019 17:34
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Picnic Princess posted:"I made sacrifices and you should be grateful!" It sounds like she's just projecting her own behavior and motivations onto you.
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Nov 3, 2019 02:17
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Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:I, I, I, me. I, I, I, me. I, I, I? Me. Me, me, me. I! Even with the odd notation, I'd recognize the No Visitors At the Nursing Home Blues anywhere.
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Nov 3, 2019 04:41
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Picnic Princess posted:"I made sacrifices and you should be grateful!" I know you meant sweety but calling them sweaty is really good
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Nov 3, 2019 06:03
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underage at the vape shop posted:I know you meant sweety but calling them sweaty is really good It’s a meme
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Nov 3, 2019 06:36
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oh?
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Nov 3, 2019 06:39
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Drag artists develop all the cool new words and uses of old crap words into cool new bitchy words.
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Nov 3, 2019 07:19
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Clitch posted:No Visitors At the Nursing Home Blues Am I able to edit the title as OP? Because it needs to happen.
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Nov 3, 2019 07:39
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teen witch posted:Am I able to edit the title as OP? Because it needs to happen. Not directly but you can ask a moderator to change it.
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Nov 3, 2019 14:38
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quote:I just recently found out ED told a person that her dad was abusive and that I watched it happen. When this person asked her to clarify what she meant by “abuse”, she didn’t give a reply but ended up blocking the person on social media instead. It is true there were two physical altercations between husband and ED as a teenager. One time after she slapped him in the face and told him to “F— off” and the other time she was being extremely disrespectful to me and he lost it with her. Both times she was physically pinned down and told she had to apologize before let loose. She claims he was choking her. Though his arm was over her neck, he had her in a controlled restraint in which he is well trained due to his occupation. Not that it was right by any means and he immediately apologized a hundred times over. My husband is the most gentle kind hearted man who would never intentionally do anything to hurt anyone much less his daughter. We had been dealing with so many challenging behaviors already with her and a lot of disrespect and this was an unfortunate result of both of us being extremely worn down. We had a counseling appointment right after the second incident and the counselor spoke to us and daughter separately to assess what had happened. After hearing both sides she did not feel the situation warranted being reported. As a mandated reported her license would have been on the line if she had heard anything from daughter that was suspicious of actual abuse. The counselor in fact still commended us as being good parents as she knew all the challenges we had been facing, how hard we were trying and how much we loved our daughter. quote:I can understand your wanting to get your side of the story told to your daughter’s partner. We all want to be heard, to be able to defend ourselves against false accusations that destroy our characters. It is so hard to be silent when lies are being thrown out about us to everyone we know. quote:Well it was sunday and I had permission to have gd so I went to es house to pick her up she was dressed up to go but she shared she wanted to play dolls at her house . Although my son said hello I event got a half hug from him but not gd who is 7 i didnt feel welcome and gd insisted we stay she had gone to the fair with my ex the day before so no matter what i suggested she wanted to play in her room , so we played my dil appeared from shopping and they began cooking a feast I saw it was getting late i said well i am gonna go and my son invited me to stay for dinner then he and my dil laughed and said my es aunt was coming to dinner the woman who has done everything to keep us apart ,continues to tell lies about me to family . I declined and my gd was very upset es and dil advised me it was time for me to get over it have a drink and join them I thanked them and left with gd crying ..what would you have done
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Nov 5, 2019 02:12
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One of the worst things about getting out of an abusive home is looking back and seeing how many people knew, but just didn't give a gently caress. Or they're annoyed at you for bringing it up, because denial is easier. It's way too common.quote:
She is suffering so much because she's forced to play with her granddaughter for an afternoon. I wonder what exciting activities she had planned for her granddaughter. I imagine a kid waiting alone in the car or sitting on a bench while grandma gets her shopping done. That little girl is pretty smart for refusing to go out alone with this harpy and insisting on staying home, in a safe space with her parents a room away.
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Nov 5, 2019 02:41
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My seven-year-old granddaughter isn't doing enough to make ME feel welcome!!
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I'm also fond of "my estranged son and his family invited me into their home and asked me to stay for dinner, but my hated sister(-in-law?) was coming, so I refused. WHY ARE THESE CHILDREN SO CRUEL TO ME?" Obviously she has the right to choose not to attend family dinner with someone she dislikes, but Christ, own your choices.
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Nov 5, 2019 03:50
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trickybiscuits posted:Well it was sunday and I had permission to have gd so I went to es house to pick her up she was dressed up to go but she shared she wanted to play dolls at her house . Although my son said hello I event got a half hug from him but not gd who is 7 i didnt feel welcome and gd insisted we stay she had gone to the fair with my ex the day before so no matter what i suggested she wanted to play in her room , so we played my dil appeared from shopping and they began cooking a feast I saw it was getting late i said well i am gonna go and my son invited me to stay for dinner then he and my dil laughed and said my es aunt was coming to dinner the woman who has done everything to keep us apart ,continues to tell lies about me to family . I declined and my gd was very upset es and dil advised me it was time for me to get over it have a drink and join them I thanked them and left with gd crying ..what would you have done Amazing. She goes over to their house, plays with their kid, they invite her to stay for dinner, and she's still complaining and still calls her son estranged? Good lord, what more does this woman want?
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Nov 5, 2019 03:51
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AuntBuck posted:She is suffering so much because she's forced to play with her granddaughter for an afternoon. I wonder what exciting activities she had planned for her granddaughter. I imagine a kid waiting alone in the car or sitting on a bench while grandma gets her shopping done. That little girl is pretty smart for refusing to go out alone with this harpy and insisting on staying home, in a safe space with her parents a room away. I think you are misreading it. As I read it, the crazy woman is annoyed that her daughter, son-in-law, and granddaughter, (who all seem to act civil, and polite, and welcoming to her), didn't want to hang out with her enough for her liking, AND have the temerity to also be hanging out with another relative, (somebody's aunt?), that the crazy lady blames for tearing this family apart. And that is a terrible crime that causes crazy lady much pain. Although I could be the one misreading it. It is horribly garbled.
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Nov 5, 2019 04:01
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teen witch posted:Am I able to edit the title as OP? Because it needs to happen. mods?! Thanks?!
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Nov 5, 2019 04:05
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BrigadierSensible posted:I think you are misreading it. As I read it, the crazy woman is annoyed that her daughter, son-in-law, and granddaughter, (who all seem to act civil, and polite, and welcoming to her), didn't want to hang out with her enough for her liking, AND have the temerity to also be hanging out with another relative, (somebody's aunt?), that the crazy lady blames for tearing this family apart. And that is a terrible crime that causes crazy lady much pain. I think we're both right, in a way. It's difficult to parse these narcissistic monologues. You're talking about the end of her post and I'm talking about the beginning. She's annoyed she can't control the entire day. In the first sentence, she talks about the granddaughter being dressed to go out. I got the impression granny wanted to take the girl out for the day, but ended up staying at her kids' house. Crazy grandma's also suggesting doing things other than playing in the grandkid's room, and granddaughter doesn't want to do them, because she's a seven-year-old girl. This old lady expects her granddaughter to follow her script, and I'm really enjoying that she's not. And she manages to shoehorn in a complaint about her ex who is not involved in any of this. So much boomer stink in one paragraph.
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Nov 5, 2019 05:01
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trickybiscuits posted:She claims he was choking her. Though his arm was over her neck, he had her in a controlled restraint in which he is well trained due to his occupation. Not that it was right by any means and he immediately apologized a hundred times over. My husband is the most gentle kind hearted man who would never intentionally do anything to hurt anyone much less his daughter. how DARE you accuse my husband who committed domestic violence in front of me twice of committing domestic violence furthermore, acab
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Nov 5, 2019 05:12
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02-6611-0142-1 posted:how DARE you accuse my husband who committed domestic violence in front of me twice of committing domestic violence Join the police! Learn how to physically abuse your daughter WITHOUT leaving a bruise, (unlike her cousin/husband).
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Nov 5, 2019 05:22
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How does that one lady have a nephew who could also be her daughter's partner? Close family I guess.
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Nov 5, 2019 05:28
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LyonsLions posted:Amazing. She goes over to their house, plays with their kid, they invite her to stay for dinner, and she's still complaining and still calls her son estranged? Good lord, what more does this woman want? She wants to be her son's wife
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Nov 5, 2019 05:53
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LyonsLions posted:Amazing. She goes over to their house, plays with their kid, they invite her to stay for dinner, and she's still complaining and still calls her son estranged? Good lord, what more does this woman want? These are all from the same human train wreck. quote:I was never able to admit to my bad behaviors because I was so young and ignorant. For me, it was drinking. SO socially acceptable and almost required if you wanted to be in the Game. quote:It has been several years and I have HAD IT with my fantasies of being a family again, of being recognized as a human that deserves Forgiveness For What I Lived Wrong. quote:The postings stunned me. Posters and handlers of the sites were hateful, arrogant and self-righteous. They HATE! Their lives are filled with gut wrenching HATE. I made mistakes, never intentional or maliciously. I have regrets but not the HATE these people (kids) wallow in!
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Nov 6, 2019 22:32
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quote:Then, many months into our estrangement, my EDs partner (who is also my nephew) called me one day and told me ED had left him and was accusing him of abusing her. Mormon, or just rural that she was loving (or being forced to gently caress) her cousin?
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Nov 6, 2019 23:17
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Cythereal posted:Mormon, or just rural that she was loving (or being forced to gently caress) her cousin? Maybe it's her in-law's blood relation? Still weird, though, not gonna lie.
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Nov 6, 2019 23:31
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trickybiscuits posted:This happens so much- the family/person gives SO MUCH and is so nice and accommodating and it's just never enough. There's always something they've done wrong or failed at. Are these people just bottomless holes of need and insecurity who only ever see what hasn't been done for them?
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Nov 7, 2019 00:37
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Admiralty Flag posted:Making a bold prediction...if she goes to AA, Martyr Mom is one of those people -- always talking, never listening -- who thinks that making amends requires the person receiving amends to unconditionally forgive the AAer on the spot with no consideration of their history together, and in fact doesn't understand that amends are not meant as a get out of jail free card for a lifetime of disrupting others' health, finances, sanity, and trust. Will hound you like a loan shark because they have an apology to make, and it trumps your boundaries, wants, needs, and mental health like everything else they've shoved down your throat for your entire life. "What kind of disgusting monster won't even listen to an apology?! I did not raise them to be so rude and ungrateful!"
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Nov 7, 2019 01:20
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quote:Drinking and using was bad??? In, ‘70s and ’80s it was just what most did. loving hell no. This era was huge for alcoholism awareness and treatment, and anti-drunk driving efforts ramped up, etc. Like many addicts, she just surrounded herself with other alcoholics.
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Nov 7, 2019 01:21
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AuntBuck posted:loving hell no. This era was huge for alcoholism awareness and treatment, and anti-drunk driving efforts ramped up, etc. Like many addicts, she just surrounded herself with other alcoholics. That generation is awful for being drunks. It’s so socially acceptable for them to drink every night after work and get completely wasted at events. Drug use seems more common in older people too. I’m in the UK and there has been a lot of articles recently about older middle class people taking coke. By contrast, the early-20s people I work with tend to be into clean living, vegan-y poo poo and rarely go to pubs or nightclubs. Maybe because they’re full of embarrassing older people? I had to laugh at her assertion that in 2019 people use more alcohol and drugs than ever.
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Nov 7, 2019 09:33
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SEX BURRITO posted:That generation is awful for being drunks. It’s so socially acceptable for them to drink every night after work and get completely wasted at events. Drug use seems more common in older people too. I’m in the UK and there has been a lot of articles recently about older middle class people taking coke. By contrast, the early-20s people I work with tend to be into clean living, vegan-y poo poo and rarely go to pubs or nightclubs. Maybe because they’re full of embarrassing older people? I had to laugh at her assertion that in 2019 people use more alcohol and drugs than ever. Probably as much because younger people have less money to go out and buy drugs and grew up in isolated suburban hell so they don't have any idea where to even buy drugs. Though I'd wager it's like the alcohol statistics where 10% of the people consume 90% of the substances.
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Nov 7, 2019 11:26
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Most of us can’t afford it, tbh.
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Nov 7, 2019 11:29
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Ghost Leviathan posted:Probably as much because younger people have less money to go out and buy drugs and grew up in isolated suburban hell so they don't have any idea where to even buy drugs. I dunno, I think isolated suburbs have their own drug problems. I think a lot of it is defensiveness, especially in a time when marijuana is becoming more and more socially acceptable but excessive drinking is recognized as a serious problem. It's easy to point at dispensaries and vape pens as evidence of an epidemic, and it distracts from the wine in your coffee cup at 11 AM.
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Nov 7, 2019 16:29
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trickybiscuits posted:When my 26 yr old Marine Corp son killed himself…his hand written letters to me were full of regret for disappointing ME! He apologized for asking me to help pay for his truck, for not being there for Me when my 20 yr relationship was falling apart, when my business partner embezzled, when his adult sister refused to talk… This is the most hosed up thing. Your son killed himself while apologizing to you and you take that as proof that you were right? And not that "poo poo my son thought I was unhappy with him! Maybe my expectations were wrong, or too high or something!" Nothing gets through to these people, does it?
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Nov 7, 2019 18:32
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