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Haptical Sales Slut
Mar 15, 2010

Age 18 to 49

Zippy the Bummer posted:

semi-solid

smells like burned hair

pro-tip: leaning to the left while on the can, and massaging the area directly above your left hip, helps the poo and fart movements because that is where your colon turns the corner on the way to your rear end

I’m gonna try this ty for the shitsqueeze technique

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Zippy the Bummer
Dec 14, 2008

Silent Majority
The Don
LORD COMMANDER OF THE UKRAINIAN ARMED FORCES
i remembered i had another case of natty in the bed of the pickup so it's nice and cold now, i'm playing aoe1

just built a storage pit

Nuts and Gum posted:

I’m gonna try this ty for the shitsqueeze technique

welcome good luck

The Protagonist
Jun 29, 2009

The average is 5.5? I thought it was 4. This is very unsettling.

Eldercain posted:

I'm drunk as poo poo and my ex showed up at the bar trying to make me mad and ..

your ex probably showed up w/o any respect to you and your belief it was to make you feel something probably only reveals your own narcissism

Feline Mind Meld
Jun 14, 2007

I'm pretty creeped out

The Protagonist posted:

your ex probably showed up w/o any respect to you and your belief it was to make you feel something probably only reveals your own narcissism

Nah I'm a regular here and she knows that and hasn't been here in a month at least

I appreciate you looking out but this is her flavor of petty poo poo and she was trying real hard

The Protagonist
Jun 29, 2009

The average is 5.5? I thought it was 4. This is very unsettling.
uhhh maybe she thought a month was an adequate amount of time for you to get over your poo poo and you don't have predetermined indefinite exclusive rights to patronize hangouts in your town just because you go there more??

Zippy the Bummer
Dec 14, 2008

Silent Majority
The Don
LORD COMMANDER OF THE UKRAINIAN ARMED FORCES
who gets drunk in bars? just stay home it's way cheaper and easier

The Protagonist
Jun 29, 2009

The average is 5.5? I thought it was 4. This is very unsettling.

Zippy the Bummer posted:

who gets drunk in bars? just stay home it's way cheaper and easier

idiots who wanna get their dick wet in the old fashioned waythe dumbest way possible

Linux Pirate
Apr 21, 2012


Zippy the Bummer posted:

who gets drunk in bars? just stay home it's way cheaper and easier

Yes.

But at the same time I can't poo poo talk getting wasted at bars/clubs with some good buds. At least pre-game.

Feline Mind Meld
Jun 14, 2007

I'm pretty creeped out
Man I dunno driving 45 minutes to go to a bar you never drink at and I'm 2 minutes from because you know I'm there through a mutual friend to be passive aggressive all night seems pretty intentional

I could just be extremely drunk tho it is this thread

Resting Lich Face
Feb 21, 2019


This case of an intraperitoneal zucchini is unusual, and does raise questions as to how hard one has to push a blunt vegetable to perforate the rectum.
:beerpal:

Except with a mostly empty bottle of liquor that was mostly full earlier

Zippy the Bummer
Dec 14, 2008

Silent Majority
The Don
LORD COMMANDER OF THE UKRAINIAN ARMED FORCES
my probos are all bottled and stored

and in great shape thanks to zone theory

Zippy the Bummer
Dec 14, 2008

Silent Majority
The Don
LORD COMMANDER OF THE UKRAINIAN ARMED FORCES

Resting Lich Face posted:

:beerpal:

Except with a mostly empty bottle of liquor that was mostly full earlier

GET MORE

Resting Lich Face
Feb 21, 2019


This case of an intraperitoneal zucchini is unusual, and does raise questions as to how hard one has to push a blunt vegetable to perforate the rectum.
I like when drunk me takes a shot and then pours another that I forget about so the next time I want a shot I find an already poured shot ready to go.

Ugly In The Morning
Jul 1, 2010
Pillbug

Resting Lich Face posted:

I like when drunk me takes a shot and then pours another that I forget about so the next time I want a shot I find an already poured shot ready to go.

I do that but with cracking beers. It works well when I’m playing multiplayer games and can’t stop to open another one, at least.

Resting Lich Face
Feb 21, 2019


This case of an intraperitoneal zucchini is unusual, and does raise questions as to how hard one has to push a blunt vegetable to perforate the rectum.
OH fuckin poo poo I just did it again. 15 minute ago drunk me is awesome!

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

not going to drink tonight and tomorrow and get really drunk on saturday

Resting Lich Face
Feb 21, 2019


This case of an intraperitoneal zucchini is unusual, and does raise questions as to how hard one has to push a blunt vegetable to perforate the rectum.

numberoneposter posted:

not going to drink tonight and tomorrow and get really drunk on saturday

Look at Mr. Functional over here.

I'm gonna get really drunk saturday too. But also tonight and probably tomorrow too.

E: whoooooa there ffs let's dail it back

Resting Lich Face fucked around with this message at 07:18 on Dec 6, 2019

Zippy the Bummer
Dec 14, 2008

Silent Majority
The Don
LORD COMMANDER OF THE UKRAINIAN ARMED FORCES
I often forget that I already have a beer open and crack open another, at which point I'm just like "well gotta pound this other beer fast"

Feline Mind Meld
Jun 14, 2007

I'm pretty creeped out
Oops I lost my job and got stuck and high

Send help gbs

LifeSunDeath
Jan 4, 2007

still gay rights and smoke weed every day
Had bunch of vodka last night, hosed up sleep, today's gonna suck. Can't wait to do it again tonight! :D

Icochet
Mar 18, 2008

I have a very small TV. Don't make fun of it! Please don't shame it like that~

Grimey Drawer
I'm hitting the cabernet sauvignon pretty hard rn

Lil Swamp Booger Baby
Aug 1, 1981

Icochet posted:

I'm hitting the cabernet sauvignon pretty hard rn

You're sucking down some Carlo Rossi don't lie

LifeSunDeath
Jan 4, 2007

still gay rights and smoke weed every day

Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:

You're sucking down some Carlo Rossi don't lie

Bota Box wines are way too good for their asking price, I'll die believing this.

Icochet
Mar 18, 2008

I have a very small TV. Don't make fun of it! Please don't shame it like that~

Grimey Drawer

Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:

You're sucking down some Carlo Rossi don't lie

Nah.

The wine came in a cardboard box though so it's hella prole

Feline Mind Meld
Jun 14, 2007

I'm pretty creeped out

Lil Swamp Booger Baby posted:

You're sucking down some Carlo Rossi don't lie

Don't doxx my parents

LifeSunDeath
Jan 4, 2007

still gay rights and smoke weed every day

Zeluth
May 12, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eqHRd9HoljA

drunk mutt
Jul 5, 2011

I just think they're neat
Does it count that I started drinking before my BAC went back down to 0.00?

There is an almost full 12 pack in the fridge that I suspect will be completed in a few hours.

Colonel Cancer
Sep 26, 2015

Tune into the fireplace channel, you absolute buffoon
Had an 11 dollar beer at a show last night :cheerdoge:

Iron Crowned
May 6, 2003

by Hand Knit

Colonel Cancer posted:

Had an 11 dollar beer at a show last night :cheerdoge:

SHould have made it 11 $1 beers

LifeSunDeath
Jan 4, 2007

still gay rights and smoke weed every day

Colonel Cancer posted:

Had an 11 dollar beer at a show last night :cheerdoge:

go bankrupt before you even catch a buzz. that's almost as bad as rennfair beer prices.

numberoneposter
Feb 19, 2014

How much do I cum? The answer might surprise you!

luv 2 chug lemon bubbly water

drunk mutt
Jul 5, 2011

I just think they're neat
Rockin a 0.323

I think it has begun

Lambert
Apr 15, 2018

by Fluffdaddy
Fallen Rib

Zippy the Bummer posted:

who gets drunk in bars? just stay home it's way cheaper and easier

& you can play World of Warcraft while getting drunk!

zaepg
Dec 25, 2008

by sebmojo
Always drink water before you sleep it off! :psyduck:

Dick Bastardly
Aug 22, 2012

Muttley is SKYNET!!!
oh poo poo i totally forgot about this thread

hi

um


im on acid

Dick Bastardly
Aug 22, 2012

Muttley is SKYNET!!!
*acid beer

Feline Mind Meld
Jun 14, 2007

I'm pretty creeped out

That sounds like its gonna be a bitch to piss

Dick Bastardly
Aug 22, 2012

Muttley is SKYNET!!!

Eldercain posted:

That sounds like its gonna be a bitch to piss

um... yeah, actually pissing has been pretty alright so far..

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Dick Bastardly
Aug 22, 2012

Muttley is SKYNET!!!
all in the toilet, none on the rim ;)

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