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Pollyanna posted:I'm still dumbfounded that so many people liked this piece of poo poo. Yeah, we get it by now.
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Jan 5, 2020 00:54
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That ice planet was also right next to the Vulcan planet so Spock could watch Vulcan be destroyed in glorious super HD
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Jan 5, 2020 00:56
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SuperMechagodzilla posted:-It’s worth pointing out that ROS does have the best gunfight scene in Star Wars, when they run through the hallways after rescuing Chewb. It’s brief, but solid. Nah, that scene was kinetic for sure but our boys were too OP, it felt like it was trying to capture TFA escape/Finn-naming scene energy but instead of being character driven it was just 'these guys can beat Resident Evil Lightgun Arcade even while running!' SuperMechagodzilla posted:-It’s actually amazing and ballsy that the entire Star War is won offscreen, as a deus ex machina, and the Rebellion had nothing to do with it. It reminds me of how, in the recent Joker, the protagonist is just some loser, while the titular Joker is actually an amorphous crowd occasionally glimpsed at the margins of the film. Yeah the plot was absolute dogshit. They even had a C3PO death scene, just have him die to broadcast his translation skill over the same magic network Palpatine was using to scare people and bam, that's a good narrative, but no they had to make everything be pointless and empty instead.
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Jan 5, 2020 01:09
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The entirety of the sequel trilogy can be skipped and just edited down into like 20 minutes of fun. Rey in the downed star destroyer. Poe admiring the jacket on Finn. Luke squeezing monster teats. Luke being crotchety. Babu Frick. And of course, "I'M THE SPY!!!!!!!!!"
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Jan 5, 2020 01:13
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Straight White Shark posted:TLJ had a decent take on Luke that caused some hilarious meltdowns, ergo it was the best of the trilogy. not that that says much Second group I see.
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Jan 5, 2020 01:58
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I'm part of the 4th group - I consider Caravan of Courage and The Battle for Endor to be the REAL episodes 7 and 8 and wait in vain for god's true sequel trilogy to be completed.
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Jan 5, 2020 02:07
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I'm watching it again on IMAX tonight. Yes, yes, I know.
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Jan 5, 2020 02:38
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Halloween Jack posted:I'm watching it again on IMAX tonight. Yes, yes, I know. If anything, you'll get to enjoy that Tenet prologue again.
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Jan 5, 2020 02:39
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Pollyanna posted:I'm still dumbfounded that so many people liked this piece of poo poo. It got pretty bad reviews and so far the financials seem to be mediocre so I'm not sure that many people did?
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Jan 5, 2020 02:54
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Yeah I don't really see any support for it; ticket sales are in line with the previous trilogies but still bad, reviews were not kind, fan reaction at best is "it looks cool".
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Jan 5, 2020 03:08
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i honestly don't know if it's possible to make a film that the hardcore star wars fans wouldn't like i guess if it had zero tiny aliens to make into funko pops
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Jan 5, 2020 03:22
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So the guy who gives the keynote speech at the First Order nazi rally on the day they blow up the Republic is the guy who turned spy hmmm
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Jan 5, 2020 03:33
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Unoriginal Name posted:So the guy who gives the keynote speech at the First Order nazi rally on the day they blow up the Republic is the guy who turned spy He has no ideals, just hate. And he hates Kylo Ren. Makes sense to me.
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Jan 5, 2020 03:35
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Pollyanna posted:I'm still dumbfounded that so many people liked this piece of poo poo. they didn't. not really. give people a few months and they'll turn on it. the few people i know who've seen tros basically all posted the same thing: 'it was a fun ride.' followed by multiple paragraphs of stuff they hated.
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Jan 5, 2020 03:36
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feedmyleg posted:I remember reading a Kevin J Anderson book in the 90s that totally agrees with you. The Courtship of Princess Leia, I think. So that's the caliber of idea we're talking about, here. I remember reading the book but not much about it. Something about witches and a Moff, nothing really specific. That said: quote:"Well, the Force is what gives a Jedi his power. It's an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us; it binds the galaxy together." So, this energy field created by all living beings can be used to lift/throw things, control minds, crush tracheas and shoot lightning out of your rear end/hands. But it can't be used to heal other living beings? It never really occurred to me either, but shouldn't basic healing techniques be Jedi 101. Like, "Okay, Padawans, here's how to share your strength through the Force to help stabilize someone in trauma so they they don't bleed out or die of shock before you can apply a loving medpac."
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Jan 5, 2020 03:37
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Jedi believed in four humors theory before the sequels.
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Jan 5, 2020 03:38
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Horizon Burning posted:they didn't. not really. give people a few months and they'll turn on it. the few people i know who've seen tros basically all posted the same thing: 'it was a fun ride.' followed by multiple paragraphs of stuff they hated. Even my friends who loved eps vii and viii and were excited about ix beforehand had zero interest in seeing it again
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Jan 5, 2020 03:43
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Unoriginal Name posted:So the guy who gives the keynote speech at the First Order nazi rally on the day they blow up the Republic is the guy who turned spy Didn't a bunch of fervent Nazis try and assassinate Hitler?
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Jan 5, 2020 04:01
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force healing has existed in the past, but only in media where a very old conception of 'hit points' was in effect. (the modern conception of 'hit points' is more like what chirrut does in rogue one)
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Jan 5, 2020 04:16
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Unoriginal Name posted:So the guy who gives the keynote speech at the First Order nazi rally on the day they blow up the Republic is the guy who turned spy The rebels are no threat to the First Order, but if he feeds them information maybe they can get Kylo out of the way for him. Then he can get his army back and crush the rebels!
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Jan 5, 2020 05:32
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ungulateman posted:force healing has existed in the past, but only in media where a very old conception of 'hit points' was in effect. (the modern conception of 'hit points' is more like what chirrut does in rogue one) The obvious conclusion is that half assed Jedi Kyle Katarn is way more powerful than Obi Wan, Anakin, and Luke. Which is good because Kyle owns.
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Jan 5, 2020 05:53
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LionArcher posted:Just about everything? Light saber fight looks good. Palp being back makes sense. Ray training so everyone in this thread who complained she was just “too good” can shut up. The scope. The imagery. A new John Williams score. After seeing this movie opening weekend this thread has been my busy box during the holidays as I travel and weather out visits among friends and acquaintances and you are definitely the most correct and sane person in this thread. Seeing people spend literal years of their lives falling for obvious fakes and spinning lovely fanfiction that is objectively worse than the actual movie we got all while despite their incessant doom and gloom still saw the movie as soon as it hit theaters, knowing they would hate it, feels legitimately unsettling and depraved. I hope they all are finally free of whatever brain problems made them feel obligated to dedicate themselves to hate the new Star Wars movies, but I know they're just going to keep posting up a storm about the franchise for years to come.
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Jan 5, 2020 06:46
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feedmyleg posted:Would love for you to open that kettle of fish. Well this is going to take a while to unpack, because boy howdy is it ever a clusterfuck. First Question: Which ST? As we all know now, Lucas’ films have a very clear and simple - but very nuanced - story structure. We have two trilogies, OT and PT. The plot is laid out in numerical order, but the actual story is achronological. 4 - 5 - 6 - 1 - 2 - 3 Although there is no literal time-travel in Star Wars, the story is about a time loop. The eternal return of the same. Prophecy. Things are doomed to happen again, and again. The only good Disney film, Rogue One, is the void at the center of the ring. Despite fitting into the plot between 3 and 4, Rogue One is extimate to Lucas’ narrative. Picture a circle with an ‘R’ in the middle. Everything circulates around it, but it never connects. For Lucas’ satire to function, the leftism of Rogue’s worldview must be pointedly excluded - even if it’s at the core of what Lucas was expressing. 4 - 5 - 6 |....R....| 3 - 2 - 1 So, that’s the groundwork out of the way. Now, how is the ST structured? This is where things get extremely complex. Barudak posted:I really loathe these films as a standalone trilogy because a ton of it is confusing as hell without the previous films To understand the ST, you need to confront this confusion. Unlearn what you have learned. There are so many bad takes because people cannot separate one film from another, and from some “meta” cultural experience: “Luke saw the prequels!” No, he didn’t. “Kylo’s a Star Wars cosplayer!” No, he isn’t. The Disney films do obviously follow Lucas’ plot (to some extent), and they do correctly identify Episode 3 as the end of the Lucas narrative. But, ultimately, they scrap what Lucas established. They’re a new thing. It’s what we call a ‘soft reboot’, subtly easing you into an altogether different narrative. Here’s proof: in the ST’s backstory, there is only one Death Star. There was only ever one Death Star. There is never any mention of a second Death Star. When Rey walks up to the Death Star wreckage near Endor, she says “it’s the Death Star!” - not “it’s Death Star 2, the Emperor’s personal Death Star, built to replace the first Death Star after it was destroyed near Yavin”. The “ST” films are set in the aftermath of a big war, but it is not the same war we see in the Lucas films. It’s a remixed version. For lack of a better term, it’s the Stupid Version. There were some mean ol’ baddies who were angry for no reason, and killed one trillion people with a Death Star, but Luke The Jedi inspired Leia’s Rebels to eradicate them all in a blinding rainbow Light of Hope. The Emperor of the baddies was killed by Luke, his Death Star was blown up, and as long as people retained their faith in the Light of liberalism, the baddies couldn’t return.... There is no mention of slavery and racism in the Republic in this stupid version. The Kessel Run isn’t an obvious lie. The fact that the Rebels failed, and Darth Vader (with the Ewoks) ultimately defeated the Emperor, is erased. Instead of being complicit in the rise of the Empire, the Jedi were merely too weak to stop it. Instead of just being a dude with legitimate grievances, Darth Maul is now an evil alien from planet Exogal, who literally all wear black robes. Etc. So, while TFA seems to follow from Lucas’ films - jumping off from Episode 3 while retaining the same numerical system - it’s a trap. Once you’re in, the door closes behind you. Lucas’ films are replaced with Solo: A Star Wars story, Rogue One, and the yet-unreleased Obiwan film (now a miniseries). Why? Because Solo is an origin story for Han, Rogue One is a (stealth) origin for Leia, and Obiwan will inevitably end on a young Luke. Each of these characters gets a film where they die, and so each gets an origin story. (Additionally, each midquel re-introduces a key faction: smugglers, Rebels, Jedis). This is why Disney developed a ‘midquel trilogy’ in the first place. The goal is to generate a new six-film continuity to replace Lucas’, without technically remaking anything. Who’s this old guy in Episode 9? Watch Solo to find out. Who is Darth Vader? Watch Rogue One to find out. What the gently caress is a Jedi anyways? Watch the new Obiwan series. (This planned structure is likely why Solo was desperately reshot to be unfunny). Of course, the Disneyverse is in constant flux due to market forces. Although we can think of the Disney films as two trilogies, Solo was also likely meant to start an Expanded Universe of Solo films, which were aborted. Obiwan is now a TV show alongside Mandalorian and a new Rogue One prequel. Meanwhile, even Episode 8 was rendered narratively irrelevant and quietly shuffled away like the Lucas films, to be fodder for references. Basically, that’s a long way of saying that the Disney films are designed in such a way that you can selectively acknowledge or ignore whatever you want. And that means things can change dramatically, depending on each viewer. Currently, the closest thing we have to an “ST” is Solo, 7, and 9 - a ‘Millenium Falcon’ trilogy, focussed on the ownership of the Falcon (and, to a lesser extent, the Solo family). Anyone reading the films this way, though, will reach vastly different conclusions from anyone following that the ‘official’ (but less coherent) numbered trilogy of 7, 8, and 9. SuperMechagodzilla fucked around with this message at 08:21 on Jan 5, 2020 |
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Jan 5, 2020 06:52
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Sleeveless posted:After seeing this movie opening weekend this thread has been my busy box during the holidays as I travel and weather out visits among friends and acquaintances and you are definitely the most correct and sane person in this thread. Seeing people spend literal years of their lives falling for obvious fakes and spinning lovely fanfiction that is objectively worse than the actual movie we got all while despite their incessant doom and gloom still saw the movie as soon as it hit theaters, knowing they would hate it, feels legitimately unsettling and depraved. wow, a guy mann post that's all about being a smug weirdo who's smarter than all the other goons that's devoid of any interest in talking about what the thread is even about
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Jan 5, 2020 07:00
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Sleeveless posted:After seeing this movie opening weekend this thread has been my busy box during the holidays as I travel and weather out visits among friends and acquaintances and you are definitely the most correct and sane person in this thread. Seeing people spend literal years of their lives falling for obvious fakes and spinning lovely fanfiction that is objectively worse than the actual movie we got all while despite their incessant doom and gloom still saw the movie as soon as it hit theaters, knowing they would hate it, feels legitimately unsettling and depraved. headed to movie jail for the crime of disliking a sci-fi movie for kids "you went into the theater wanting to hate it!" was played out like 13 years ago
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Jan 5, 2020 07:32
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Low Desert Punk posted:"you went into the theater wanting to hate it!" was played out like 13 years ago I wish I wanted to hate it.  The Last Jedi already crushed my hopes of Finn getting any screentime outside of terrible sidequests, so if anything I was primed to be won over.
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Jan 5, 2020 07:34
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it's pretty bold to assume that people these days have both the disposable income and free time to bother spending movie ticket prices and 3 hours on something they came in expecting to dislike
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Jan 5, 2020 07:37
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Low Desert Punk posted:i honestly don't know if it's possible to make a film that the hardcore star wars fans wouldn't like
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Jan 5, 2020 07:46
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SuperMechagodzilla posted:Here’s proof: in the ST’s backstory, there is only one Death Star. There was only ever one Death Star. There is never any mention of a second Death Star. When Rey walks up to the Death Star wreckage near Endor, she says “it’s the Death Star!” - not “it’s Death Star 2, the Emperor’s personal Death Star, built to replace the first Death Star after it was destroyed near Yavin”. another entry under the weird column titled 'the ST tries to ignore return of the jedi entirely'
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Jan 5, 2020 07:53
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Sleeveless posted:After seeing this movie opening weekend this thread has been my busy box during the holidays as I travel and weather out visits among friends and acquaintances and you are definitely the most correct and sane person in this thread. Seeing people spend literal years of their lives falling for obvious fakes and spinning lovely fanfiction that is objectively worse than the actual movie we got all while despite their incessant doom and gloom still saw the movie as soon as it hit theaters, knowing they would hate it, feels legitimately unsettling and depraved. You’ve made this same post in a dozen threads over the course of the holidays. Is everything okay at home? If you have to “weather” the company of those supposedly close to you in real life, maybe you should take a break from the internet, friend. ruddiger fucked around with this message at 07:58 on Jan 5, 2020 |
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Jan 5, 2020 07:55
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SuperMechagodzilla posted:This is why Disney developed a ‘midquel trilogy’ in the first place. The goal is to generate a new six-film continuity to replace Lucas’, without technically remaking anything. Holy gently caress. I can completely and utterly believe this to be true. It really sounds like something Disney would do.
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Jan 5, 2020 07:56
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teagone posted:I spent my Friday night photoshopping what "Punished Solo" might look like because I'm a turbonerd. That "wandering ronin" type a goon mentioned influenced the concept. That's really cool and you're a good artist  You've also sold me on the idea of that kind of movie starring Ben as he just wanders (a series would probably be better, though) silently and tries to do good and redeem himself would be entertaining, like a cross between those wandering ronin movies and old Eastwood westerns. They could have had times he slips because he's still struggling and ends up having to flee whatever planet he's on because of it, as well as still killing him at the end but have it be something better than RoS.
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Jan 5, 2020 07:56
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SuperMechagodzilla posted:There is no mention of slavery and racism in the Republic in this stupid version. The female stormtroopers in the ST felt like someone saw the “we need more female prison guards” meme and thought it was earnest. And the fact that TLJ revealed that the financial backers of the Resistance is the same as the First Order, but it’s a good thing in ROS, felt like a twisted version of what’s going on in the new Watchmen series on HBO (which deals heavily with systemic racism in this country and is pretty fantastic, by the way). ruddiger fucked around with this message at 08:13 on Jan 5, 2020 |
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Jan 5, 2020 08:03
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LionArcher posted:Just about everything? Light saber fight looks good. Palp being back makes sense. Ray training so everyone in this thread who complained she was just “too good” can shut up. The scope. The imagery. A new John Williams score. Shh, you're undoing years of therapy.
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Jan 5, 2020 09:00
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Second Question: Exogol???? We need to talk about Exogal. I’m honestly surprised that fans aren’t absolutely furious about this. Undead Palpatine gets all the attention, because everyone loves the prequels, but the actual massive twist in ROS is that literally every conflict in Star Wars was the work of the Exogolians from planet Exogol. Who’s that weird guy at the end of Solo? In the context of the ST, he’s an Exogolian, wearing the telltale robes of his culture. Exogalians are behind organized crime. Who’s that guy at the end of Rogue One? That’s the Exogolian known as Darth Vader. (According to Wookieepedia, the Exogolian relic from the start of ROS was Vader’s personal “wayfinder”). Who is the “Darth Sidious” Luke’s talking about? Another Exogolian - he destroyed the Jedi. Palpatine is obviously an Exogolian. Rey’s parents were, of course, killed by an Exogolian. Exogolians are the ‘midichlorian’ twist times a billion, in terms of their devastating impact on the Star Wars narrative(s). But where the midichlorian twist was specifically laser-targeted at New Age horseshit interpretations of The Force, the Exogolian twist is just aimlessly moronic. But it’s in the film. You can’t avoid it. Sorry. Exogal is a seemingly-barren planet, home a relatively small (but nonetheless sizeable) population of Sith. Sith is the national religion of the Exogolians, who are otherwise notably multiracial. (The ‘rule of two’ is evidently out, or non-applicable here.) So, when Palpatine says that he is “all the Sith”, he clearly means that he wields the collective psychic power of all the Exogolians in the arena. But, who’s not an Exogolian? Kylo Ren!!(And probably Dooku). Kylo is now officially confirmed to be not a sith, for what it’s worth. For a more philosophical-type question: did Snoke know he was being controlled? Anyway, the Exogalians’ sole major industry is Starship production. Note that the stormy, hidden planet and stony arena imagery are a mix of Kamino, Geonosis, and the mining planet from Solo. Implicitly, the Exogolians are the arms dealers ‘selling to both sides’, from TLJ. Call it a plot hole, but the Exogolians don’t employ droid or clone slaves for some reason. But then, they ask for no money either. They want nothing but manpower. The economics of it are baffling. Who’s building all this? Anyways, Exogol is a thing now.
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Jan 5, 2020 10:31
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'planet that inexplicably has a billion star destroyers' somehow makes me less angry than 'planet whose population inexplicably produces star destroyers'
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Jan 5, 2020 10:42
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Sleeveless posted:After seeing this movie opening weekend this thread has been my busy box during the holidays as I travel and weather out visits among friends and acquaintances and you are definitely the most correct and sane person in this thread. Seeing people spend literal years of their lives falling for obvious fakes and spinning lovely fanfiction that is objectively worse than the actual movie we got all while despite their incessant doom and gloom still saw the movie as soon as it hit theaters, knowing they would hate it, feels legitimately unsettling and depraved. Why are you trying to smug goon using a gimmick post from 200 pages back? You doing okay there?
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Jan 5, 2020 10:48
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SuperMechagodzilla posted:There is no mention of slavery and racism in the Republic in this stupid version. The Kessel Run isn’t an obvious lie. The fact that the Rebels failed, and Darth Vader (with the Ewoks) ultimately defeated the Emperor, is erased. Instead of being complicit in the rise of the Empire, the Jedi were merely too weak to stop it. Instead of just being a dude with legitimate grievances, Darth Maul is now an evil alien from planet Exogal, who literally all wear black robes. Etc. The weirdness of the whole thing is that the closest to acknowledging the idiocy of the Jedi was TLJ. Sure, it was a flawed movie (I liked what it tried to do anyway, I'm dumb) but it did seem to want to go back and actually acknowledge the cycle Lucas set up. Yoda and Luke agree the Jedi are bad. Kylo's motivation is to attempt to unsuccessfully break the cycle and he deludes himself into thinking he can use the tools of the cycle to somehow break it. The movie is a big setup for a metaphorical rebirth of the resistance and something new. Then we the TROS conclusion, which is that Rey and Ben are determined to continue the cycle for eternity. It's presented as a heroic victory but it should really be a loss, because in 20 years when Disney inevitably makes Episode 10 some bad dude is going to go to Exogol to learn how to make red lightsabers and shoot lightning. Forget slotting the sequel trilogy into the greater whole, it negates itself. SuperMechagodzilla posted:Exogal is a seemingly-barren planet, home a relatively small (but nonetheless sizeable) population of Sith. Sith is the national religion of the Exogolians, who are otherwise notably multiracial. (The "rule of two" is evidently out, or non-applicable here.) So, when Palpatine says that he is “all the Sith”, he clearly means that he wields the collective psychic power of all the Exogolians in the arena. This part is also confusing, as everything we've seen of the Sith religion is that it's thinly veiled egotism. The Sith religion is explicitly rejecting harmony with the universe and others in favor of promoting yourself and removing your own inhibitions. This is not very conducive to forming a giant team to cheerlead an old man in a wacky space chair. Then again, Palpatine in the film seems to have found space Jesus (yelling about "protecting his faithful" when before he didn't care) so what do I know? SuperMechagodzilla posted:Anyway, the Exogalians’ sole major industry is Starship production. Note that the stormy, hidden planet and stony arena imagery are a mix of Kamino, Geonosis, and the mining planet from Solo. Implicitly, the Exogolians are the arms dealers ‘selling to both sides’, from TLJ. I thought Palpatine was literally conjuring them with his evil sorcerous ways? The arms dealers from TLJ in the casino seem very intent on flaunting their wealth in gaudy ways, while the Sith cultists have more of the stone and metal aesthetic you mentioned.
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Jan 5, 2020 10:59
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teagone posted:I spent my Friday night photoshopping what "Punished Solo" might look like because I'm a turbonerd. That "wandering ronin" type a goon mentioned influenced the concept. It's a bit much. Maybe lose the hoodie, the fingerless gloves, a couple of the belts and definitely the man bun.
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Jan 5, 2020 11:12
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the "rule of two" is just Republic immigration quotas for Exogolians
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Jan 5, 2020 12:37
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