DACK FAYDEN posted:lmao at the gold event being +1 literal coin and +1 unrest because the crowd is flummoxed lol that the coin weighs 1 pound and was delivered to the treasury
|
|
#
?
Dec 31, 2019 17:37
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 23, 2024 19:36 |
|
|
Ramc posted:lol that the coin weighs 1 pound That's why it was impressive.
|
|
#
?
Dec 31, 2019 22:32
|
|
|
The Lone Badger posted:That's why it was impressive. The coin was impressive? What about the EAR? How long to do you have to work a crowd to find a guy with ears that big?
|
|
#
?
Jan 1, 2020 13:39
|
|
|
That's why it was an impressive trick.
|
|
#
?
Jan 1, 2020 19:41
|
|
|
hey, that coin can buy you like 15 gems at the flea market. Don't knock it.
|
|
#
?
Jan 2, 2020 03:29
|
|
|
Turn 17 Quite a few events this turn! We got 7 pearls and 8 nature gems from them, a real nice chunk. Wraiths claimed the Iron Throne, which must be the one just north of us. It lets you recruit Adepts of the Iron Order, E2S2 + 1xFAES, who are great especially if you don't have any earth like we don't. These guys forge dwarven hammers, earth boosters, astral boosters, and more. If you're a nation without astral or earth then these are 100% worth going to war over.  We finished construction 2 and alteration 1 this turn, next up will be conjuration 3 for better elementals and the in-battle boosters like phoenix power, summon earth power (not that I have any earth mages), and power of the spheres which boost fire/earth/all paths respectively. With the construction our main use will be turning our air gems into research with Air Quills - since we have a 12 research clown making them they pay themselves back in research after just 2 turns and we will continue making these for pretty much the entire game. Hopefully this will get us back into the research game after starting far behind.  Finally in his 4th search our incredibly expensive Ancient Clown actually found a site! 1 pearl per turn is certainly not nothing but I am kind of wishing that I'd kept the gold or just had him researching instead. Anyway he moves on to the next province. In diplomacy news, I had a long chat with Anglia and we agreed to kill Fennoscandia. However I insisted that I wanted to nip over and quickly kill Karanaac first with U, which I said wouldn't take long at all. Anglia was unhappy with this delay so I said to go ahead without me and I'd join in when I could. I, of course, then immediately warned Fennoscandia that Anglia was about to attack them and got this response: quote:[12:08 PM] PurpleXVI: I just want you to know that if Anglia dunks me, I'll send you all my stuff if you promise to kick their rear end. Also my notes from the time are: quote:I agreed with Anglia to attack Fenno and am moving a large force there. However that large force is going to nip to karanaac. That war will be over by christmas and then I'll nip back to take Fenno's cap. That's 100% how it will go. Accordingly my troops are all moving south east over to the candle transport system. The UW indies are even going with them since I need every troop I can get. We're just 2 turns from being in Karanaac lands!  This will leave me pretty defenseless against U and Eljudnir but the former isn't really a threat right now (and they have lots of forces in Karanaac regardless, apparently just killed the new prophet rock), and the latter has agreed peace with me. Plus I have been encouraging Iram and Chasos about how much their fire/lighting will gently caress up the wraiths (and telling the wraiths the same) so I hope there'll be some war dividends there. One troop that you'll never see me recruit are the circus monkeys. I don't really have need of chaff with my kick-rear end sacreds but a surprise force of these (well, more likely the knife throwers) with flaming arrows could be a pretty funny play against the wraiths with their flaming poop. One for the back pocket. 
gonadic io fucked around with this message at 18:54 on Jan 2, 2020 |
|
#
?
Jan 2, 2020 14:53
|
|
|
I really, really want to see an army of monkeys throwing flaming poop. At least once, you have to make this happen. It won't even be that expensive because the monkeys are super cheap! EDIT: I mean, what, 50 monkeys is 250 gold? And whatever mage to cast flaming arrows is probably only another 250 gold, so you're looking at only 500 gold for comedy amazingness. DO IT. Arcturas fucked around with this message at 17:42 on Jan 2, 2020 |
|
#
?
Jan 2, 2020 17:40
|
|
|
Arcturas posted:I really, really want to see an army of monkeys throwing flaming poop. At least once, you have to make this happen. It won't even be that expensive because the monkeys are super cheap! You don't need to be clowns to do it, there's monkey nations with fire access in vanilla! E: broke my own policy, removed spoiler gonadic io fucked around with this message at 19:38 on Jan 2, 2020 |
|
#
?
Jan 2, 2020 18:35
|
|
|
gonadic io posted:*Monkey Business* I am annoyed there is no bite attack that the monkeys have. Especially with that unit description.
|
|
#
?
Jan 2, 2020 19:39
|
|
|
gonadic io posted:there's monkey nations with fire access in vanilla!
|
|
#
?
Jan 2, 2020 20:59
|
|
|
Ramc posted:lol that the coin weighs 1 pound and was delivered to the treasury I am the disc, 5.5cm in diameter and 1cm in depth, that a magician found behind a person's ear
|
|
#
?
Jan 3, 2020 16:14
|
|
|
Turn 18 Anglia's invasion of Fennoscandia started this turn, they have a large force sitting on a fort in the cap circle. 40 units might not seem like a lot but 40 units in which the gun teams outnumber the infantry certainly is. Apparently they're also launching an invasion through the east side of the caves. Fennoscandia informs me also that they're tussling with the mantises in the west side of the caves (south of Karanaac) and re-affirms that they'll give me all their stuff if they die.  As I promised to Fennoscandia, my force on their borders moves off to take the large candle so we can reach Fennoscandia. You'll notice, however, a second large force moving up to Fennoscandia borders and those guys I did not make any promises about. I'm worried that Fenno is going to instantly fold to Anglia and mantises and I'm keen to snap up a few provinces.  This is the candle province that we're moving into. 40 cave trolls would be pretty scary to a human sized force but I'm confident that my clowns will walk all over them. This province has a lot of connections to Karanaac, the cave system, and the other candles so it's a very important crossroads.  Our forces are 33 enormous clowns, 29 regular clowns, 3 first clowns, 1 thirteenth clown, and 1 armless woman. I don't really have too much magic at this point so the scripting is almost all buffing the troops who will wait a few turns and then charge in. After that the mages will go off script and spam the evocation 1 spells and the armless woman might make a few skeletons. In particular I made sure to take some of the astral 2 mages so I could potentially magic duel the rocks but I don't have the research or the pearls so that's probably not going to happen unless we get in some kind of long siege situation. This is almost all of the mages and troops I've been recruiting to date - I'm not taking any chances with Karanaac.   In the north west, U took the throne that I passed over. I guess they have probably stopped sending troops to Karanaac now? That doesn't bode well, and nor do the absolute hellscales that U apparently has. They must have had an incarnate portion to the bless in addition to just 10 strength, I wonder what it was? Quickness would be pretty funny, blood vengeance would be hilarious. U's pretender is awake and it's worth noting that this is the pretender (and late game summon also) whose gimmick is that he blesses every friendly unit in a fight, even non sacreds. I don't know of any other such effect in the game that does this, and it turns the feet from comical jokes to pretty painful ones.  Finally let's go to the next of the circus animals that I never recruit, the noble elephant. Elephant strategy is actually pretty complicated and several dominions youtubers, including our own Monkee, have done videos on the topic. In short they can walk all over (literally) most indies and are great expanders but they have terrible morale and you have to plan their inevitable retreat such that they don't walk all over your troops too. However I have hellblessed giant clowns and so don't need them to expand. 
gonadic io fucked around with this message at 15:04 on Jan 6, 2020 |
|
#
?
Jan 6, 2020 14:37
|
|
|
What does Co-ordinate Magic Display do again? I know the Slapstick Display makes you very tough....
|
|
#
?
Jan 7, 2020 08:19
|
|
|
I love this writing so much.
|
|
#
?
Jan 7, 2020 08:49
|
|
|
The Lone Badger posted:What does Co-ordinate Magic Display do again? I know the Slapstick Display makes you very tough.... Good point, I'll go over them next turn once we see all three clown buffs in battle.
|
|
#
?
Jan 7, 2020 09:39
|
|
|
Turn 19 Wait what? What throne do they have? They took the one just south of me, how on earth did I miss this?? Also they're clearing thrones while getting attacked on two fronts? I am 100% taking this throne off them before they can build a fort on it, that gives me 3 turns to do so. The throne of water gives W3 hydromancers which are great if you have no water access (they were pretty instrumental to my Karanaac win) but are only nice-to-have for me. I move some clowns south in case they decide to use that massive force of trolls to launch a preemptive strike against me.  U also claimed a throne this turn, the silver throne. Adepts of the Silver Throne would be nice for us to have but mostly because of their 25% chance of having the astral/earth cross path - that's the main one we're missing until our god wakes up. I really wish I'd taken it a few turns ago when I had the chance.  I changed my turn order at the last minute, directing the north-most force to clear out the Chasos indies. These were the ones where the commanders had feeblemind-on-damage swords so I wanted to hit it with the overwhelming force of enormous clowns and I certainly succeeded. I made a big wall to protect my valuable prophet and mages from any chance of feeblemind. I'm not entirely convinced if we'd notice if the Emerald Impaler got hit by one though, professional jousters aren't exactly known for their smarts.   The battle on the large candle went nearly perfectly. Even the small clowns, who could be trampled, were kicking rear end too quickly to be in much trouble.  How might this go??  Oh, this is how.   We also see who this province is named after, and they're armed with a slap that permanently shrinks you. Sadly they ran off to die in the wilderness somewhere and didn't manage to hit any clowns with it despite how funny that would have been.  Since this is the first non-expansion fight we've been in (and nothing else happened this turn) I want to talk about our forces a bit. Chaos power, which gives bonuses to stats in turmoil dominion and penalties in ordered dominion, is some real poo poo. The recruitable clowns only have chaos power 1 at that, some of the summons have more. Also I'm only going to talk about clowns with the larger bless, it's less applicable without that. Okay so I've been showing and talking about mostly the enormous clowns so far, and used them pretty exclusively for expansion. However they're a whopping 80 gold compared to the small clown's 30 and if you compare damage then against targets that are size 1-2 (both deal double damage with kicks), or size 5-6 (neither deal double damage with kicks) then 2 small clowns will deal more damage than 1 big one. The big ones have slightly higher attack/defense and double hp (so the same HP per square) and are additionally funnier but against, say, rocks there's an argument to be made that I should prefer the smaller ones. One instance where the smaller ones are much worse is against earthquake but it's still reasonably early so which nation out there would have the high earth, good research, and specific turn 1 summons that cast it every combat round??? (it's rocks, rocks are that nation).   Let's also talk about the clown buffs. They were added recently after the player in the first domingler game (who took death explosion and charged bodies bless incidentally) pointed out that clowns take a huge amount of attrition in fights and especially when expanding since they only have 4-5 protection. Having, say, a regen bless doesn't help you when you get chunked for 15-20 at a time by a single heavy infantry and losing the 80 gold enormous clowns to a province of 30 militia is incredibly painful. There are three of them and they all require one priest level and one of another path. The first is the water buff, Coordinate Slapstick Display, and is my choice for expansion as previously discussed. Indies rarely have magic weapons and so this leaves clowns with effectively 20 protection - the same as heavily armoured knights. It's good.  Next Coordinate Magic Display the air spell gives mirror image. On regular troops with no magic paths it gives only 1 image but that's still a 50% chance to negate one otherwise successful attack. It's incredibly good with the Twist Fate bless to negate the first attack that would break the mirror image and that's a favorite combo of elf (or illusion) nations who also get mirror imaged troops. It's also another effect that's better for small clowns than big ones because then you get the effect twice instead of just once. This is why some of the clowns look blurred in the battle screenshot above (which also shows my spotty buff coverage). The clown mages like it even more because they get a lot more images - 2 per air path so on a thunder weapons pretender they'd have only a 1/15 or 6.7% chance of actually being hit by a melee attack.  The third spell is the astral variant Coordinate Miming Display. The protective force buff exists on a few items and on the Ice Shield spell but I'd never seen it before playing clowns. 50% chance to basically negate an attack but this time it doesn't go away after triggering once. Do note that it doesn't protect against armour-negating attacks like mirror image does but it seems better otherwise.  Even just Slapstick Display on its own turns clown expansion into god tier and with all three up then clowns are really hard to defeat in melee (in turmoil) without magic weapons at the bare minimum. The downside as you've seen is that it requires you to use your 3 commander point and 3 path mages to cart your troops around ensures that you have a pretty slow research start. Back to this game, Anglia have moved onto Fennoscandia's cap leaving behind only a token besieging force on the cap circle fort. I don't have visibility ingame but they beat the cap PD easily. They also let me know that Fennoscandia have not, in fact, rushed the spell Foul Vapours to go with their poison resist bless. Totally baffling. Fenno is going to have to really rush their throne force back to fight this off. My force moves up, I'm going to give Fenno 1-2 turns to fight off Anglia before I declare them a lost cause and take what stuff I can. I'm looking forward to the bunch of nature and death gems they might send me!  On the west side, it's finally time. Finally. Karanaac's god and 6 boar warriors are hanging out and I would love for them to either stay there or attack me but it's more likely they'll run off into the cap. That's fine I'll get them eventually. I let Karanaac's player know that I'm attacking them for the crime of playing rocks and I'll be happy to stop as soon as they give me their cap.  Karanaac get an incredible construction 6 teleport item for rocks/statues only and if my god got ahold of one of those he'd be totally unstoppable and never suffer from getting stuck on an enemy fort while unable to cast teleport to get away. That item alone is worth letting Karanaac live since without their cap they're much much less of a threat.  My black servant (yikes) also managed to scout out the lake this turn and Karanaac...haven't expanded there at all? What? They're by far the most underwater capable nation and a solid lake/island presence would be effectively impossible to root out. My amphibious indies can't kill 20 militia let alone a huge rock with astral shield.  I also had a quick chat with U who did manage use those immortal massive guys to kill a few Elder Stones, the cap only rocks that take 3 turns to recruit, so that's not nothing. Unfortunately they got repulsed again and one of those immortal 50-gem summons got soul slain by a rock so rip to him (soul slay ignores immortality and kills you stone dead which you don't come back from). Now there's a few big rocks sitting right in a chokepoint so they've basically given up. Finally Pongy failed to find any sites yet again, and we got 3 nature gems from a bush. Seriously, 550 gold just strolling around providing basically zero value. That could be (I assume) roughly 3 more enormous clowns instead! gonadic io fucked around with this message at 02:31 on Jan 8, 2020 |
|
#
?
Jan 8, 2020 00:05
|
|
|
clearing thrones while your cap is under siege is some kind of energy
|
|
|
#
?
Jan 8, 2020 01:48
|
|
|
Ramc posted:clearing thrones while your cap is under siege is some kind of energy Well firstly Anglia moved real fast, so I wasn't actually expecting them to attack me when I cleared that throne. Then when it became obvious they were on the offense, a large enough number of my frontliners were sacreds that I figured I'd grab the throne to boost them before rolling my goons back(since the Throne of Water adds I think it's +3 defense to the bless). I also didn't expect Anglia to paste me quite as hard as they did.
|
|
#
?
Jan 8, 2020 02:13
|
|
|
It was at this point that Anglia informed me that Fennoscandia had not, in fact, been rushing foul vapours to go with their poison resist bless.
|
|
#
?
Jan 8, 2020 02:24
|
|
|
gonadic io posted:Finally Pongy failed to find any sites yet again, and we got 3 nature gems from a bush. Seriously, 550 gold just strolling around providing basically zero value. That could be (I assume) roughly 3 more enormous clowns instead! When you think about it, that's actually pretty comical.
|
|
#
?
Jan 8, 2020 11:35
|
|
|
PurpleXVI posted:Well firstly Anglia moved real fast, so I wasn't actually expecting them to attack me when I cleared that throne. Then when it became obvious they were on the offense, a large enough number of my frontliners were sacreds that I figured I'd grab the throne to boost them before rolling my goons back(since the Throne of Water adds I think it's +3 defense to the bless). Yeah turns out we're in the peak of Anglia's power right now in game. If I'd known this was the case and wasn't playing Anglia for the first time I would have played things after Fennoscandia a lot differently and more successfully than I end up doing.
|
|
#
?
Jan 8, 2020 21:44
|
|
|
 Kirkostaculis, you have your new unique unit.
|
|
#
?
Jan 10, 2020 13:43
|
|
|
The Lone Badger posted:
A 737 commander with fire and earth crosspaths?
|
|
#
?
Jan 10, 2020 13:47
|
|
|
Probably a bad moment to mention that my language's pronounciation of the company Boeing happens to sound the same as our onomatopoeia for metal bouncing off a rock.
|
|
#
?
Jan 10, 2020 14:27
|
|
|
Turn 20 Our first act of aggression against the rocks begins! We sweep into the south-most province of the rocks, that their god was occupying last turn. Not sure which province he was going to move to bu-  WAIT the god stayed put? With just like 5 troops, plus province defense, against a force of 60+ clowns? I'll take it. They must have not seen the candle province getting taken, and been site searching or something. As before, the clowns buff up and surge forward although this time I had the foresight to place a squad of bodyguards right at the back.  Burning Man buffs a bit himself including with flight and jumps to our backlines - perfectly running into the bodyguard squad.  Looking at his stats however he's actually not that much better than a single giant clown! More HP and protection sure, but less strength, same attack rating, and less defence rating. How embarrassing.  He does actually manage to kill 2 giant clowns before the others return from pasting the meager rock troops and, well, it doesn't look good for him.  A few seconds later Burning Man has had enough and flies off, ending the battle. Commanders with flying retreat pretty easily so it can be quite hard to actually kill them. Before he fled though we inflicted a chest wound and took out both his eyes. If this was vanilla that pretender would be out of the game but with the Pretenders Enhanced mod it gets recuperation (and the temporary gems you may have seen earlier) for free and so after a few turns will be good as new. Those few turns might be all we need though!   A victory for the good guys! We go directly onto Karanaac's cap this turn, I can taste the +6 pearl income already! Rocks have exactly one turn to prevent me from sitting on their cap forever so I'm expecting a pretty big attack next turn. If they have the gems they'll fire off a world shard, which earthquakes (with half AOE) every turn. The larger bless is one of the best tools against that though because it's in play turn 1 and boosts my mages up to ~25 hp each putting them mostly out of the danger range of a single pre-buff earthquake. You can see also in the far west that, firstly, Karanaac has built a fort on a border with an enemy - absolutely not what you want to do. It's much more preferable to put them in a really safe place like, say, an island nobody else can get to. Secondly Mantises are not pressuring them at all despite implying in chat that they were. If I hadn't been here to save the day it looks a lot like Karanaac would have been able to fight off U and get established properly thus probably dooming the game to a slow death by rocks.  What's this other battle? We were attacked by wraiths? If the rocks have convinced them to backstab me this could spell trouble. I reach out and they say that this was an accidental click and they'll move off and let me take it back. Hmm, where have I heard this before?  I move a small force up to retake it, assuming they're being honest, and I won't move any large force back until I know for sure that they're attacking. Plus as I've said before clowns are much better at fighting defensive wars in their hot and chaotic dominion instead of in the cold and death-ful wraith one.  We do at least get to see the incarnate part of the wraith bless and it was undead regen after all. I don't think this is a great choice since wraiths don't generally have massive amount of sacred troops or even high HP commanders but they probably wanted a high death pretender and it's not the worst.  Speaking of potential backstabs there's a mantis pretender hanging out in the caves. Hopefully they're there to take the throne or some cave provinces from Fenno instead of trying to make trouble for me and protect the rocks.  For the third potential backstab of the turn, Fennoscandia's troops have rushed off to protect the cap leaving behind just 2 mages who presumably are building stuff. That fort will not go up.  Fenno have a large force of (presumably) mercenaries and trolls who are probably going to try and bust the cap siege this turn. I don't know how long they've got since Anglia's artillery gets large amounts of siege strength but the cave force would probably not have had time to get back yet. If they lose this fight and their cap gets taken then they're just dead, and I'm charging in for scraps.  Our events are great this turn, 600 gold and 20 gems! Forget my previous complaining I love luck scales. This is going to be spend on finally, after 20 turns, starting to produce some lizard shamans and break into nature magic. I move a clown mage up to build a lab next turn. With the gems I arrange to buy a Smasher, an anti-rock melee weapon, from the ants. We might not need it for the big siege but it'll let lone thugs clean up the rocks much more easily without needing a few thousand gold worth of giant clown troops with them. We also hit conjuration 3 this turn and so script some elemental summons on the mages moving to Karanaac. Next we queue enchantment 2 for, uh, I forget. Flight maybe for clown thugs that we don't have the other stuff for? Seems doubtful. The last of the circus animals that we'll never see in game are lions. Two decently strong attacks and 13 attack skill makes them generally better than human troops especially if there were buffed with a Slapstick routine. I'm not entirely sure what lions performing slapstick comedy looks like but it certainly knocks 'em dead. 
gonadic io fucked around with this message at 14:22 on Nov 17, 2020 |
|
#
?
Jan 10, 2020 19:28
|
|
|
Being a god and getting beaten up by clowns has to be extra embarrassing Going to go ahead and assume he was blinded by a 3 Stooges eye poke.
|
|
|
#
?
Jan 11, 2020 20:17
|
|
|
Ramc posted:Being a god and getting beaten up by clowns has to be extra embarrassing he's just got custard in his eyes and doesn't know how to clean it out
|
|
#
?
Jan 11, 2020 21:06
|
|
|
in my mind, the clowns actually never (or very rarely) kill anyone in a fight, they just so thoroughly humiliate their opponents that they give up, go home, and reevaluate the path they took in life that led to them being blinded by a barrage of ballistic pies before being tap-danced on by a 20-foot-tall clown e: this includes rival gods; the resummon period for them would instead be a bunch of priests trying to convince them to return to god-ding and stop drinking themselves stupid while muttering about "the honking... the honking..." President Ark fucked around with this message at 01:38 on Jan 12, 2020 |
|
#
?
Jan 12, 2020 01:35
|
|
|
Chest wound and double eye-loss? Sounds like he was laughing so hard he couldn't see through the tears.
|
|
#
?
Jan 12, 2020 02:00
|
|
President Ark posted:in my mind, the clowns actually never (or very rarely) kill anyone in a fight, they just so thoroughly humiliate their opponents that they give up, go home, and reevaluate the path they took in life that led to them being blinded by a barrage of ballistic pies before being tap-danced on by a 20-foot-tall clown this is now also my personal canon
|
|
|
#
?
Jan 12, 2020 02:23
|
|
|
Turn 21 One thing to note about the turn order is that battles that result from teleporting happen before site searching and way before regular battles. You usually only see this thing pretty late into the game but in this case Karanaac are dumping some rocks onto our head. But which rock? It's this rock! The 30 earth gem summon. World Shar  World Shards are even beefier than your average rock with 350 hp and 25 protection. A poor militia man's fist will do absolutely nothing against one. E3N3 is a great caster but it's worth bearing in mind that as a teleport attack spell there's been no opportunity to script them or give them any gems. However this doesn't really matter because of the world shard's heart. Every single round the heart casts tremor, which is earthquake that only affects 50% of the battlefield. Every. Single. Round. If you are a militia man you will be dead long before you get remotely close to it. Earthquake also does nothing against fliers (except in caves) which leads to some pretty funny situations like in the first mods game where the clowns paid a wasp removal service to remove a world shard from on top of Kirkostaculis itself. Earthquake can be negated by high armour (which we don't have) or just defense (which I believe represents you jumping just before the earthquake hits?). We're in turmoil 3 here so have a nice and high 15-17 defense. Finally tremor specifically deals extra damage to inanimates so that the shard will eventually kill itself.   In our case we are neither flying nor small so it won't be a complete wipeout one way or the other, plus our invulnerability buffs help once they go up. The first earthquake isn't too bad, hitting only a few clowns and the indie commander leading them.  Before too long though we get the surround on the world shard and well, that sure is a lot of numbers on it. 25 protection is high but 30 strength is higher.  Let's tally up the casualties! The humans all died as I would expect but the clowns, even the ones that are "only" size 3 have double the hp pool so should mostly be okay. Oh wait, of course the 13th Clown decided to play the fool.  Let's all remember Febrile and Wiry in his prime, and not crippled on the ground with two broken calf bones shouting something about having legs to stand on. He never made it into the hall of fame.  And with that we move onto the cap, brushing aside the tiny amount of defense left after U took it the first time. The eagle eyed amongst you might notice that most of the small clowns have been left back in Academic Eremitage because they were being led by either the indie commander, the armless woman, or Febrile and Wiry himself. With their leader dead they got confused or were holding a wake or something.  Faced with the choice of leaving them to possibly die or leaving the safety of the fort to go back for them I, of course, send all my forces back to the province we just left. Left behind on the cap is only a single clown mage with 5 admittedly enormous bodyguards. I gamble that Karanaac's crippled god won't break siege into this huge force and will instead sit at home healing. Honestly even if he does, 5 enormous clowns sitting at the back waiting for him to fly in might well just be able to kill him there and then. Also looking at the map over here you can see that Karanaac has another temple up in Fallen of Coax and U has a 200-strong force on the borders in Jb's Jaunt. They've lost an incredible amount in this war between the cap storming attempt and the soul slays meanwhile I've lost 2 mages and 3 troops. I do hope they don't decide that now's the time to jump in and take the spoils from me after I did all the hard work for them.   Elsewhere: chaosos claimed the throne of life (reducing aging for all units), we find a small handful of gems, and we get a villain attack. Villains are no big deal, often being turned away by even pretty moderate amounts of PD. However since I'm so short on gold and have maxed out luck scales I've only been buying a single point. Even worse, the villains prevent me from reaching the province that the wraiths said they'd give back. It is pretty lucky that they did not waylay any commander. Faced with my fading claim on those lands I quickly recruit an indie commander next door in Razor's Reach and also start preparing a small force to send north. At long, long last a lab is being build on Greevil's Bog the lizard province.  In other news Anglia kicked Fennoscandia's rear end in the battle for their capital. Fenno now have few troops and all their forts under siege. I let Purple know that I'm invoking the contingency clause of our agreement and nabbing some provinces myself to "fight Anglia". Sadly they informed me that they'd changed their mind about giving all their gems and items to me too. There's two big clowns squads, one on the cave throne and one by the lake, and even the force of amphibious indies (yet to get enter the water) get in on the action. 
gonadic io fucked around with this message at 02:43 on Jan 14, 2020 |
|
#
?
Jan 14, 2020 00:07
|
|
|
At this point I tried to calculate how I could do the most damage. I had a decent stash of gems and I thought: "Who would, with these gems be the biggest pain in the rear end?" I'd heard nasty things about U. Gonadic was doing pretty well with the Clowns, but I felt slightly manipulated and that's why I backed out of the deal to give him all my gems. Also because at this point I have a strict minimum of one betrayal per game, and this was my last chance to get one in here. Karanaac was already dead on the ground. Anglia was a no-sell for obvious reasons. And then I saw Eljudnir: "Hmmmm, I thought. They look like Buff Ermor. Everyone hates Ermor. Ermor ruins everyone's day. HEY, ELJUDNIR, WANT MY GEMS? RUIN SOMEONE'S DAY. THANKS."
|
|
#
?
Jan 14, 2020 00:28
|
|
|
I double-checked my discord history and Anglia sent me this screenshot: edit: also Purple, that explains this conversation quote:[5:10 AM] PurpleXVI: Is Eljudnir store brand MA Ermor in this one? gonadic io fucked around with this message at 00:39 on Jan 14, 2020 |
|
#
?
Jan 14, 2020 00:35
|
|
|
gonadic io posted:Turn 21
|
|
#
?
Jan 14, 2020 01:40
|
|
|
quote:Let's all remember Febrile and Wiry in his prime, and not crippled on the ground with two broken calf bones shouting something about having legs to stand on. He never made it into the hall of fame. 
|
|
#
?
Jan 14, 2020 01:41
|
|
|
President Ark posted:in my mind, the clowns actually never (or very rarely) kill anyone in a fight, they just so thoroughly humiliate their opponents that they give up, go home, and reevaluate the path they took in life that led to them being blinded by a barrage of ballistic pies before being tap-danced on by a 20-foot-tall clown The one exception is that Eljudnir grimdark hero, dude got comically large-kicked over the treetops
|
|
#
?
Jan 14, 2020 01:46
|
|
|
Fearless_Decoy posted:A funeral procession for a clown must be a magical thing to see. The Cirque du Soleil performance "Corteo" is about the death of a clown and his funeral procession. He dreams about it before he dies, so while everyone is mourning and performing he watches from atop his hospital bed. It really is quite a good one of their shows. You can find a trailer here. Donkringel fucked around with this message at 05:40 on Jan 14, 2020 |
|
#
?
Jan 14, 2020 05:35
|
|
Hey everyone MA CASSIA is ready for download! Here is a link to the relevant post!
|
|
|
#
?
Jan 16, 2020 01:25
|
|
|
Donkringel posted:The Cirque du Soleil performance "Corteo" is about the death of a clown and his funeral procession. He dreams about it before he dies, so while everyone is mourning and performing he watches from atop his hospital bed. This better not be tragic clowning
|
|
#
?
Jan 16, 2020 02:25
|
|
|
|
| # ? Apr 23, 2024 19:36 |
|
|
Turn 22 Our anti-rock smasher arrived from Myrmecos! I'm not sure exactly when I'll have the opportunity to get it to my guys sitting in enemy lands, or if I'll even need it, but it's good to have one. Bashes up those rocks real good and also works against e.g. elementals and undead too should that ever come up.  Pokey, sitting innocently on top of Karanaac's cap, got hit by a seeking arrow! This was 100% fired by Karanaac's pretender since it's their only mage with air and I mean, what else is it going to do this turn if it's waiting for its eyes to grow back? Seeking Arrow is an enchantment spell and Karanaac absolutely have to get enchantment research early so that confirms it.  Luckily not only is Pokey a clown, who are tougher than humans, he's a giant size 3 clown. Not many blesses and certainly none of the other HP blesses keep their effect outside of battle - larger is basically the only bless that protects sacreds against ritual magic like this, Note that prophets, pretenders (in dominion), and people with the holy water or blessed shroud items are actually blessed at all times and so do get regular bless benefits on the world map. Pokey shrugs off the arrow.  Our troops move back to Academic Eremitage to pick up the stragglers and I absolutely triple check that I do order them to move. It would be real embarrassing if they missed the bus a second time. Karanaac also get a second chance to teleport some more stuff onto me but since I brought basically my whole force back I'm not too worried about it. U took the province to the east, Ernigrad, this turn making me glad I left stuff on the cap. Although I suppose U is pretty unlikely to try to contest me for it. Also note that due to how this map's provinces are laid out U can't move around Karanaac's cap it's a complete choke point. There's no more provinces they can take except going via me or via mantises in the caves.  Our two battles against Fennoscandia go reasonably well, taking out some PD and 600g of mages for no losses. We also got in right before the fort went up.   Angla had actually left Fenno's cap to take the fort down in the caves, so we can't gain any more ground here. They actually offer me the cap and I gladly accept. I'm not entirely sure why they don't want it but maybe they're not eager to battle through 50 armoured trolls? They're probably just worried I might turn on them next which, you know, I might.  We could go onto the cap this turn but since there's another 15 enormous clown reinforcements coming I decide to delay it 1 turn. The squad led by the Emerald Impaler instead go east to Hagrid's Forest and then the two squads will go onto the cap together. Our 50 strong force of UW indies will take one of the edge provinces too, little chance of there being much PD there.  Up north we take back that province that Eljudnir accidentally took from us. Since we've seen no sign of any attacks from them I guess it really was just an accident. They must have been pretty tempted to own the mistake and roll with it. We can also see that Iram (the fire djinn nation, summary coming shortly) has taken one of their cap circle provinces so they're pretty unlikely to want to start a new war while under attack. What kind of crazy OP nation would take on two neighbours at once and win??  Finally we get to see ants...fail to take one of the candle provinces? I have no idea why Kitfox is using the shittiest of the ant troops, the ones with only 6 protection - that's only just more than a clown suit!  Just look at all these numbers.  This was happening right in the top left candle. I see there's already a fort on one of them and all the candles are wastes so maybe this a force recruited only from the neighbouring province which can't produce any armour? I'm really not sure.  We can't quite afford to build a temple to go with our lab on the lizard shaman province without cutting back on clown college so we'll do that next turn. Yet another unit we've not see much of are Buffoons. If you had non-clowns their morales of 9-13 then it'd be 100% worth putting a Buffoon in every squad. Clowns however have a morale of 15, plus another 2 from our bless, which is high enough that I can't really be bothered to spend the gold, the clicks, or the map move to keep buffoons around. 
|
|
#
?
Jan 16, 2020 22:57
|
|