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National spell to awaken the crab sleeping inside the colossal stone head.
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Feb 3, 2020 14:27
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 05:09 |
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Being an enormous crab, there is nothing left to attain but godhood.
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Feb 3, 2020 15:12
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The God-shelled One was the previous Pantokrator's pet hermit crab and merely large, until the previous Pantokrator Ascended, allowing the God-shelled One to use the Pantokrator's skull as his home.
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Feb 3, 2020 15:19
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Turn 28 With the trap now sprung, the mantis pretender jumped all the way to the west of Kirkostaculis, on our border with U. Unfortunately this means, if they weren't already aware, then U now knows that we're being quite successfully raided by the mantises. I didn't bother recording a new gif, if you want you can go back and rewatch the old ones for the same effect.  Speaking of U, they make an attempt to capture that one roadblock province between their lands and Karanaac bringing along one leg thug and three shatter Sophotatos. Shatter deals a large amount of damage against rocks and these three mages auto cast it every turn so should they get into range of a rock unmolested they stand a really good chance of killing it. Also about a hundred feet and a handful of leg sacreds.  However there was one thing that Karanaac brought along that U could not consider, the ultimate counter to unbuffed feet: like 20 PD of really lovely troops.  Shatter has a really short range and so it can be quite challenging to get your mages to walk up to rocks to cast it. In this case the mages, who also are E1H1 mages, walk forward until they are in range of the Ichtyids and NOT the rocks and then stop to cast random garbage.  Meanwhile the feet themselves to manage to run forward to the rocks and...do absolutely no damage while dying in droves to poison cloud.  The leg thug with its 3x24 strength attacks does at least manage to get a little bit of damage in but soon eats a smite to the face. Being mindless it's immune to astral shield and soul slay but NOT the holy spells.  Meanwhile the U mages suffer from the classic ermor/sceleria problem: the only units left on the battlefield with minds are the commanders. So astral mages spamming paralyse and soul slay can only target them. They get stunlocked to oblivion and the lovely PD clean them up at leisure. They never once get close to being in range.  Oof, this is pretty indicative of why rocks really suck to fight. Heavy amounts of them just sitting there and your troops totally failing to do anything to them. Still I'm happy though, that'll keep U from pressuring Karanaac lands for a while.  Now that we have thunder strike up and running I'm feeling a lot more confident about taking those lizards on. We take about 20 enormous clowns, 2 air mages, and Pongy who cast Coordinate Slapstick Display and then default to thunder striking. Even if the mantis pretender turns up again, and thinks to buff lightning resistance, she will probably get one shot by a thunder strike if it hits. It is a Good Spell (tm).  We also go to retake the province that she just captured. Now this is a smaller squad and probably won't be able to take her on in a fight but I'm betting that the mantises don't have another 800 gold to waste like that again and are pretty unlikely to think that I'd be so stupid as to fall for the same trick twice. Unfortunately for them, I'm willing to risk it.  Talking of being stupid, I don't exactly remember why my forces decided to sit next to Karanaac for another turn instead of breaking the siege. Maybe I just wanted to let them bring more reinforcements for me to crush, maybe I wanted to patrol down the clown-boosting unrest here to make it a fair fight? The best answer I can come up with is that I was hoping that, fresh from their victory, the mantises would come fight me in this very unruly province. Looking back that seems really dumb and I should have just gone right back to Karanaac.  With no sign of aggression from Anglia and with the fort just finished, our big clown force over here can start moving towards the mantises through the cave system.  Anglia themselves are now sitting comfortably on Fennocandia's cap and I'm pretty confident that this is the end for them. Would have been real nice if I'd had gotten it but them's the breaks. 
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Feb 3, 2020 16:05
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gonadic io posted:
here you go: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MBX8eRScFvk&t=153s
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Feb 4, 2020 04:52
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...the mountains dont give back what they take...
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Feb 5, 2020 15:00
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Turn 29 Karanaac have a prophet announcement even though they probably only have about 3 commanders left in total. Of course the AI doesn't follow the naming gimmick, I really ought to finish it off before too long.  Once again we clear up the mantis' mess in our provinces. There was indeed no repeat of the PD trap and so our 20 normal clowns clean up a handful (looks like 6) of defence with ease.  The lizard province proves to be no trouble either once we had brought along an actual force and additionally our new (not remotely secret) weapon, thunderstrike! Sadly in this battle it mostly misses but in alternate timelines it could have easily killed a minimum of 3 lizards per cast.  Our force moving through the caves also runs into little opposition although it is unfortunate that an Armless Woman got sniped by a single lone arrow. That's what you get for not being a real clown I suppose.  The mantises retake the central candle but we've just finished moving through it so it's not a huge deal for now. Given its importance though you'd think I'd give it more protection.  Finally we get to see which of our undefended provinces the mantis queen has jumped to this time (I strongly encourage you to watch the whole gif before continuing to scroll).  Wow. It was a stroke of absolute genius to leave those forces next to Karanaac instead of breaking the siege. I'm so incredibly smart with my great plays that are indistinguishable from cowardly indecisiveness!  quote:[9:03 PM] gonadic io: I killed the mantis pretender, now they lost all of their incarnate blesses...oh To further top it off we get to see the ants lose a massive army taking a throne this turn! I've been trying to encourage Anglia to fight them (and them to fight Anglia) but haven't really had much luck, maybe this will help. Kitfox is incredibly unfortunate here since they assembled a very hefty force of armoured tramplers and then it turns out the throne defenders were a flaming arrow caster and 150 horse archers!  The fire cuts right through the beetle shells and then despite some good trampling, the water elementals finished them off. Ouch. That is also the worst and least armoured of the ant troops I have no idea why they're using those.   As for our movement we've taken back all our raided provinces and are moving forward triumphantly! In the caves:  In our own lands (ignore the fruitless site searching going on):  And onto Karanaac itself, despite all the mantis reinforcements. I mean we just killed their god how could they possibly beat us now? Sadly we don't have gems so can't thunderstrike but our 60 enormous clowns and lots of (not thunderous) lightning/arcane bolts are surely going to be good enough!  Taking a quick peek at the undead we see that Chasos managed to take the fort completely and are presumably marching on the cap again. 
gonadic io fucked around with this message at 00:32 on Feb 6, 2020 |
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Feb 5, 2020 22:35
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Because different dominions patches show different versions of the battle, here's what it looks like in an alternate timeline where my clowns don't miss their thunderstrikes:
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Feb 5, 2020 22:37
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Gods dying to clowns in single combat never gets old.
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Feb 5, 2020 22:48
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I do enjoy seeing the lone Sage Grimm fucked around with this message at 00:43 on Feb 6, 2020 |
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Feb 6, 2020 00:41
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Sage Grimm posted:I do enjoy seeing the lone FROM THE TOP ROPE!
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Feb 6, 2020 00:54
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Only in embracing Comedy and making a hilarious error could the clowns find victory over the Hell Mantis.
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Feb 6, 2020 00:57
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gonadic io posted:Finally we get to see which of our undefended provinces the mantis queen has jumped to this time (I strongly encourage you to watch the whole gif before continuing to scroll). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5LD9Jlspyo&t=408s imagine that sam is fighting a clown instead of an objectivist Sage Grimm posted:I do enjoy seeing the lone oh you just know he's never going to shut up about that in every pre-match interview President Ark fucked around with this message at 01:19 on Feb 6, 2020 |
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Feb 6, 2020 01:09
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Sage Grimm posted:I do enjoy seeing the lone Ramc posted:FROM THE TOP ROPE! 
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Feb 6, 2020 01:22
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The Emerald Impaler was actually extremely close to getting the kill but was just a point or two short, before he tagged in one of the enormous clowns to take the last blow.
gonadic io fucked around with this message at 01:32 on Feb 6, 2020 |
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Feb 6, 2020 01:30
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gonadic io posted:The Emerald Impaler was actually extremely close to getting the kill but was just a point or two short, before he tagged in one of the enormous clowns to take the last blow. Emerald Impaler knows that he doesn't need the win and instead chooses to get one of the up and coming midcard guys over. What a legend.
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Feb 6, 2020 01:54
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Cerebral Bore posted:Emerald Impaler knows that he doesn't need the win and instead chooses to get one of the up and coming midcard guys over. What a legend. so true fukken cryin here
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Feb 6, 2020 01:55
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Man, I forget just how great glamour is for shenanigans, it's so hard figure out what my armies are doing exactly as Chasos, I think I baited out two different armies of the undead with that priest and then ganked them both because I was actually hiding massive forces in the swamp, then straight onto the mostly empty throne fort! I did not take notes. Can you tell? Very helpful for LP where the main player can't even see my troop movements.
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Feb 6, 2020 13:12
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Kitfox's renown for massive amounts of PD and being fully defensive played against gonadic here; trying to convince someone to attack the most irritatingly tough target that also isn't in any position to win the game is a hard sell
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Feb 6, 2020 18:06
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Also trying to convince Kitfox themselves to attack anybody is a hard sell. The game reallife had the most involved Kitfox I've ever seen before or since.
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Feb 6, 2020 18:11
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so, uh, has kitfox ever won a game
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Feb 6, 2020 18:17
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V. Illych L. posted:so, uh, has kitfox ever won a game Dominions is about making your own goals, and kitfox wants to make the tower of babel out of PD. Who are we to judge?
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Feb 6, 2020 18:25
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Didn't he kill a game by PD buffer overflow? That's basically winning.
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Feb 6, 2020 18:59
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goatface posted:Didn't he kill a game by PD buffer overflow? That's basically winning. My understanding here is 'yes he did'
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Feb 6, 2020 22:32
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The second best thing to winning is making sure that nobody else can win either.
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Feb 8, 2020 10:42
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Turn 30 Flush with our victory after killing Fennoscandia's god last turn, we ran right into the large force on Karanaac. Our forces were, as usual, 40 enormous clowns, some mages, the Emerald Impaler, and we even have the last dozen jugglers and the last unicyclist from our starting army.  We're against about the same number of good mantises, then the same number again of chaff mantises. The good ones have 14 attack and 20 defence versus our clowns' 15 attack and 17 defence. That throne really makes a difference! The mantises also have 2 small air/fire thugmages, 1 death, and 1 big one.   Both sides rush forwards while their respective mages unleash thunder strikes. The difference however is that mantises have only 20 hp on their good troops, whereas this enormous clown with his 67 just shrugged off a direct hit to the face.  The clowns and mantises engage and you can see a few of the clowns have been hit with a Coordinate Magic Display to allow them to dodge a mantis hit. Our formation is also slightly flatter so we get a small temporary surround on the very first mantis troops  The mantis' death mage also helps us out with a few shadowblast casts.  The mantis mages wisely do not jump into the enormous clown bodyguards, preferring to sit back and cast. The smaller ones, not able to cast thunder strike, instead waste their time summoning illusions. Against normal giants they'd be an okay roadblock but against clowns with 3 magic weapon attacks a round they just disappear instantly. Honestly this bodes well for a future war against Chasos.  Before long it's just over. The mantis mages all fly off and we win the day with surprisingly few losses! This really is just a DPS race, these battles finish very quickly.  With that out of the way our other force is also moving up through the caves.  Our events are pretty good this turn, 800 gold and a Lore Master. These guys are cool but also it's paths we already have so he's going straight to the cap and is going to join Esteban and Diana in the library. That room must be hell.  One more event this turn, looks like we lost the game. Sorry everybody, LP over, time to go home.  Nah it's just a bug that the defeated message now mentions your god every time regardless of who actually dies. What actually happened was that Anglia successfully stormed Fennoscandia's cap. There's only about 70 troops remaining so either it was a costly battle or Anglia's other army didn't bother to turn up and it was not at all a costly battle. One of the two. You can see that Fennoscandia would actually still have a province left except it got hit by one of the Chasos indie attacks.  On that side we have another clown force (the one that took the lizard province) continuing to move down to the candle and/or our Anglian border. They've got a lot of land, good scales, and Kitfox is not a remotely threatening neighbour so I'm definitely starting to get concerned. I've now switched to recruiting Bearded Ladies instead of Armless Women mostly just because of the reduced gold cost. One of the water randoms is making some rings of water breathing for me so we can try a second strategy to get underwater - it can hardly go worse than the first.  Our two huge clown forces charge into mantis lands. We'll take the mantis cave fort, then swing back around to take their throne. Given our outstanding performance in Karanaac I'm confident that my biggest force has got this.  I also reach out to the mantis player this turn, offering peace for their only throne. I would really like not to be in a hellwar for the next 20 turns when I have more threatening neighbours I'd like to deal with. I got this reply: quote:[3:51 PM] gonadic io: I don't really have much reason to fight you, you attacked me! Sigh. 20 turns of fighting an AI that doesn't understand peace deals it is. I just hope nobody backstabs me while I'm doing it! In our research we hit evocation 5 this turn, the main prize being Storm. The anti-flyers and anti-missile effects are nice don't get me wrong but the main reason we want to cast this is that it enables the other spell Summon Storm Power, enabling every one of our First Clowns (and also the Clowns Paramount and Ancient Clowns of course) to cast Thunder Strike.  Evocation 5 also gives us Orb Lightning, a nice thing for lower level air mages to do when I'm not going all out with Storm, Shadow Blast for Armless Women, and Stellar Cascades/Astral Geyser for generic astral damage spells. They're all good, but not thunder-strike-in-a-storm good. Next research is to go up enchantment to level 4 for reasons I won't go into just yet.  Another unit we'll never see in game is the Sideshow. We're just far too poor to ever spend any gold on things that aren't our main attractions: clowns or clown accessories (for example research). 
gonadic io fucked around with this message at 19:16 on Feb 9, 2020 |
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Feb 9, 2020 17:16
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Mercifully the wrong 'whoops you died' message has since been fixed in the current version. also lol the sideshow
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Feb 9, 2020 18:08
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gonadic io posted:[3:51 PM] gonadic io: I don't really have much reason to fight you, you attacked me! Finally, a Let's Play that captures the true essence of Dominions
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Feb 10, 2020 03:02
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Feb 10, 2020 10:35
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colossal stone clown head pretender when
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Feb 10, 2020 16:07
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It's just a giant stone cone that spins. After all, all clowns congregate underneath a big top. 
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Feb 10, 2020 18:28
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Sage Grimm posted:It's just a giant stone cone that spins. After all, all clowns congregate underneath a big top. 
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Feb 10, 2020 20:14
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jesus christ esteban
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Feb 10, 2020 22:44
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Inexplicable Humblebrag posted:colossal stone clown head pretender when Pinned discord images has you covered it seems 
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Feb 11, 2020 03:41
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Turn 31 Ssaon'raha have indeed gone AI, but the war isn't won quite yet. The AI is pretty stupid but one thing they are good at is massing a large number of troops and run them into your lines. There's a few tricks you can do like herding their movement by buying PD but we'll see them as they happen. First off we're jumping on top of one of their forts in the caves, it had 100 mantises on last turn but they're not actually here now. It's worth noting that this force still has 15 enormous clowns acting as bodyguards so the vast majority of fighting was done by small clowns instead - they're really good!   Next we're continuing to push into Karanaac's old lands that the mantises are in now. 40 enormous clowns and some commanders are facing the remnants from the battle last turn. Seems like the AI (or Giacomo when they went AI) did not bother to move them so we hopefully get to clean up some unprotected mages!   I didn't bother setting up thunder strike this turn so we mostly just get lightning bolts which are still good but take two hit to kill the big mantises (this is not 111 damage, this is 11 from the spell and 1 from the stun).  Still though our clowns kill off the few remaining mantis troops pretty quickly then it's just the mages at the back left.  I mean these smaller mantis mages are still pretty good with great stats, 3 good attacks, and fire shield 10. With our bless though clowns don't care too much about that and there's only a few non-clowns on our side that might be vulnerable.  This battle is a cakewalk really, only a matter of seeing if we lose an enormous clown or make it through the fight without any losses. But wait what's this?  The Emerald Impaler, despite his orders to stay at the back and be a good leader, has decided that he's had enough of spinning his wheel idly and is going to get a piece of the action. He zooms past the bodyguards, past the fighting forces too.  He runs past opposing phantasmal warriors, aiming for a real target.  Ladies and gentleclowns we've just lost picture! We can't see what's going on! I'm hearing now that we've got the feed back, let's go live to the floor. The Emerald Impaler has just stepped into their limo for a moment before the post-match interview he'll be back in a seco--  No... no say it's not true! It's just a bit right? He'll be back next season won't he?  The Emerald Impaler will live on in our hearts. He never made it into the hall of fame despite being heroically strong for about 20 turns at this point (still nowhere near as strong as a clown of course).  We get an uprising in that very same province - Mother Gaia herself is in uproar.  From those two battles one clown, Blood-Curdling, gains the soul butchering ability. Just what is going on in there? He now causes fear and also makes death gems when he fights.   The mantises send some more troops our way over the top of the Karanaac fort again.  So we are going to jump on them, they're just lovely little ones and we'll get a free lovely fort out of the deal too.  Speaking of forts we didn't quite break the walls of this one so we have one more turn hanging around.  Our reinforcements are on their way to retake the candle. Also pictured here is a massive Anglian force that, according to Xanrick, had nothing better to do than kill the Chasos indies that were there and then back off leaving the province to me with 0 PD??? Extremely suspicious. This clown force are absolutely ready to turn around at a moment's notice.  Up north in the lizard province we discover that while she was there the mantis queen actually tore the lab down! How very rude. Goewin here built the temple last turn so will build the lab this turn with all our event money we got. Then, maybe, we'll finally get one single lizard shaman that survives a whole turn - unless there's another Chasos indie attack of course.  We finally have a smallish force of clowns to go retake that peninsula province that was taken from us by said Chasos indies. Also the undead seem to be putting up a pretty good fight! This is mostly because U have backstabbed Iram up there having given up on doing anything in Karanaac's lands, thus taking the pressure off of the undead a bit. I, of course, immediately tell Iram that I'm open to backstabbing U. Speaking of, U still haven't managed to get one of those xpshape giants up to mason level and upgrade all their forts.  What's really nice about using the Bearded Ladies for researchers is that they have fortune teller. Hopefully the few bad events that make it through our scales will get stopped if I have enough Bearded Ladies there. I'll only really be massing them in Kirkostaculis itself but I'll be recruiting a few from every fort.  What's one step up from a Sideshow? That's right it's an Idiot! These guys are slightly below average humans. That's it. I will never recruit any and would not even if I was playing a scales build. 
gonadic io fucked around with this message at 09:22 on Feb 13, 2020 |
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Feb 12, 2020 22:14
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Emerald Impaler no!
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Feb 12, 2020 22:20
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Two things. 1) Soul Eater Heroic Perk? WTF? Is that modded in? I have literally never seen that perk my entire time playing Dominions. 2) Do idiots have an XP Shape? The flavor text implies they become buffoons?
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Feb 12, 2020 22:27
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Soul Butcher is just a really rare heroic ability. I’ve only seen it a few times.
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Feb 12, 2020 22:30
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XP promotion has an icon, so no they don't.
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Feb 12, 2020 22:36
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 05:09 |
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If he'd lived until I'd gotten construction 4 (or I'd prioritised it) then I could have put a shroud on him which would enlarge, give more hp, and also make him pretty resistant to the fire shield. Even now I could have given him a ring of fire resistance if I'd thought about it.
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Feb 13, 2020 01:06
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