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jerk irl posted:Do you guys think that this pandemic thing will delay to SC's release? I am kind of worried. no crobs has developed a highly advanced remote system so they can log in from home and forge jpgs. It requires spectrum internet tho, but they're looking at licensing out the tools to speed production even further. Really now is the time to buy in even more.
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Mar 30, 2020 10:46
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Coming in Q2 2020! That's just right around the corner!  I just honestly can't believe that these are things on their important development map that actually need mentioning. These are features that just get patched in randomly in a real game.
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Mar 30, 2020 17:43
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We can’t move on from death animations until it’s PERFECT *finished product looks like complete dogshit anyway*
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Mar 30, 2020 18:45
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This game is still in production? I’m legitimately surprised they still have money left isn’t one of their offices in Santa Monica, they’re just living high on the hog paying themselves out salaries, guaranteed this will end with them running out of money going welp, we tried! And they’ll all retire comfortably
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Mar 31, 2020 02:27
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Define "production."
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Mar 31, 2020 02:40
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Production = perpetual state of taking money and producing very little.
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Mar 31, 2020 02:50
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Ok then yes.
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Mar 31, 2020 02:51
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A lot of people don't have any idea what game development actually looks like, but it explains a lot that Chris Roberts evidently is one of them. Have there been any insider stories/postmortems on Duke Nukem Forever's development?
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Mar 31, 2020 05:31
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Synecdoche, New York was a documentary
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Mar 31, 2020 05:59
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https://clips.twitch.tv/CuteCuriousWasabiPicoMause this guy spent 3 hours escaping prison in star citizen
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Apr 23, 2020 16:36
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Apr 23, 2020 18:03
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odd they would need advice in this area. i would think they are already the industry experts
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Apr 23, 2020 18:42
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Of course I see they're too cheap to spring for the summoning circle I presume is standard for filling these roles.
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Apr 23, 2020 18:43
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throw to first drat IT posted:https://clips.twitch.tv/CuteCuriousWasabiPicoMause Do not take the stairs as this will result in death
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Apr 23, 2020 19:39
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Pennywise the Frown posted:Coming in Q2 2020! That's just right around the corner! I find the first one funny since it is a feature BF5 was stated to include and afaik still not in the game. It was commonly used as a criticism on how the game was unfinished and not what the developers promised.
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Apr 23, 2020 20:47
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Pennywise the Frown posted:Coming in Q2 2020! That's just right around the corner! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1kpd9K8_bA
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Apr 23, 2020 21:15
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Do it ironically posted:This game is still in production? I’m legitimately surprised they still have money left isn’t one of their offices in Santa Monica, they’re just living high on the hog paying themselves out salaries, guaranteed this will end with them running out of money going welp, we tried! And they’ll all retire comfortably They spent the quarter billion people gave them and have been getting tens of millions in loans from banks and stuff to keep going for the last year or two. Nobody knows exactly how much they keep getting/have/need. I'd expect a second great depression will eventually start hitting their bottom line since their entire business model involves providing nothing to people too stupid to use their disposable income for anything else. You aren't going to make those people smarter but you can deprive them of disposable income.
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Apr 23, 2020 21:57
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This grift isn't even funny anymore, hopefully the idiot cash flow dries up and this thing finally dies like it should.
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Apr 23, 2020 22:05
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Rectal Death Adept posted:
You’d think so, but their made up funding tracker shows them on course to break records and deliver a bumper year of pledges in the worst economic downturn in history.
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Apr 23, 2020 23:05
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I doubt their numbers are real, but if they were I wonder if shame would ever set in and they'd be like "ok listen people are starving the streets maybe give that money to a food bank or something"
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Apr 24, 2020 00:19
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No way those numbers are real. They have never gone an hour, in seven years, without selling something. You can't tell me that in the middle of the night on a random tuesday, six months since their last patch and who knows how long to the next they were still selling $1,000 worth of ships every hour. They would go radio silent and have more than a year between major updates. Still $1,000+ every hour without fail. They either are lying outright or are folding in outside investment or something. Like the loan they got translates to +25,000$ a day in "sales" for over a year or something. When they need positive press and to make the game look healthy and interesting they report a $500,000 sale day for all those record breaking self-reported sales figures to make headlines, almost ten years into development of an obviously dead MMO.
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Apr 24, 2020 00:46
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good point, rectal death adept. you'll make rectal death journeyman anyday.
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Apr 24, 2020 01:29
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Cyks posted:I find the first one funny since it is a feature BF5 was stated to include and afaik still not in the game. It was commonly used as a criticism on how the game was unfinished and not what the developers promised. And it never will be since DICE announced today that their next patch is the last one of the game. It'll still be an unfinished disaster where even Hardline has more content.
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Apr 24, 2020 01:32
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Rectal Death Adept posted:No way those numbers are real. They have never gone an hour, in seven years, without selling something. One of the worst down turns in economic history (worldwide) and they keep making that money! Makes sense!
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Apr 24, 2020 06:11
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I got it guys. Trump needs to get Croberts on his economic recovery team. They can send us jpegs of covid-19 tests. Problem solved.
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Apr 24, 2020 18:39
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0/4 tasks completed! We did it guys!
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Apr 24, 2020 19:06
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Pennywise the Frown posted:Coming in Q2 2020! That's just right around the corner! Because having a large variation of death animations is the #1 requested feature by Star Shitizens. Well, actually, right behind various sexual fetishes involving CPAP equipment
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Apr 24, 2020 19:29
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When is the next hot dog and pretzel buffet for platinum elite donors
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Apr 24, 2020 20:06
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Combining animation with physical ragdoll simulation, in 4 easy steps  This is a great example of the many problems of Star Citizen distilled into one: 1. wasting time on the most inconsequential features 2. treating features that are products of the game's internal structure as add-ons 3. doing everything out of order resulting in work having to be constantly redone 4. charting progress disingenuously to minimize the importance of what they haven't done and overemphasize the importance of what little has been achieved Beyond the lack of actual progress on the game, the most egregious offence is that nothing about the drama has manifested or changed in years. It's become a boring saga to follow since they basically stopped having a public face or doing disastrous live play events. This could have surpassed Zybourne Clock, Doobie's Dog House or even Samadhi Village in the laugh department but now it's just mental illness on display with regards to the people still invested in the game, and I'm a firm believer in punch up not down so I don't think there's anything funny in that. Still hoping for the AMD letter to surface because just the story about the letter is funny as gently caress. Imagine running a scam game development company and a serious microprocessor/semiconductor company is reaching out to you repeatedly in collaboration and your Mickey Mouse operation can't even get a demo reel together for the biggest trade show of the year for your industry- and you feel so insulted in your coked-up stupor that you pen a letter to the vice presidents and everyone high up telling them just how insulted you are and how dare they. I want to know what he was thinking. I want to understand his process. I want to see The Letter.
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Apr 24, 2020 22:11
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Owlbear Camus posted:Hey speaking of infectious diseases, can they add a feature where microbial life is simulated and you can like do a blood draw and see various bacteria and viruses and stuff under a microscope in your ship? You could also simulate all the white blood cells in each players body and give them buffable stats if you take special immunoboosters. I want to play as one germ among many in a bacterial infection taking over the body of another player, like maybe an important faction leader. We can coordinate our efforts to disable them during vital inter-faction negotiations or strategic battles
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Apr 24, 2020 22:25
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Vim Fuego posted:I want to play as one germ among many in a bacterial infection taking over the body of another player, like maybe an important faction leader. We can coordinate our efforts to disable them during vital inter-faction negotiations or strategic battles hell yes, wanna infect the High Emperor of the Stimpire and make him poo poo himself inside out at the exact moment he’s commanding his supersoldiers to land planetside and commence the slaughter just trying to finish his deathly serious “worst kind of electricity” evil badfella speech and being brought to his knees as he’s slammed by wave after improbably large wave of diarrhea
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Apr 24, 2020 22:48
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Excellent train glitch timecoded https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=URQmwnwoxjk&t=80s
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May 1, 2020 01:28
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LifeSunDeath posted:Excellent train glitch timecoded The Great Train Robbery
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May 1, 2020 01:54
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Amethyst posted:thanks a lot now I get to read hilarious posts such as this No problem
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May 15, 2020 16:42
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Star Citizen is more sad than funny, and I got equally bad vibes from the megathread itself last time I checked it out. As far as I can tell, there had not been any more hilarious conventions or live streaming events for a while before covid so there really isn’t new content being generated for us to mock. It’s the same stuff they keep doing, from steps out of order to outright fakery. They haven’t innovated the grift and the same questions are unanswered so where’s the fun? The fact that I see the same posters post the same things they did 3 years ago makes me QCS/FYAD concern troll style worry about the mental health of some of the posters in that thread. If you don’t have money in the game there’s nothing to really be animated about at this point.
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May 15, 2020 18:04
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You clearly missed the Bag Man appearance at last CitizenCon. It was the highlight of the show. Beyond that, that's it yeah, it's really quite dead and the only thing to look forward to in the short to mid-term is the backers' reactions to the Unreal Engine 5 demo that just came out... ie. "Star Citizen's graphics look about 15 years older than this demo but please let me take the floor for about 55 minutes as I elaborate why I feel it's a smart move to invest in a yet-to-be-3d-modelled space ship for this yet-to-be-conceptualized video game to be released in a yet-to-be-envisioned century."
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May 15, 2020 20:06
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The obvious solution will be to do another engine switch, necessitating a couple more years of development.
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May 15, 2020 20:40
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Kung Food posted:The obvious solution will be to do another engine switch, necessitating a couple more years of ... allowing for a couple more years of dollars.
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May 15, 2020 20:42
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COMPAGNIE TOMMY posted:Star Citizen is more sad than funny, and I got equally bad vibes from the megathread itself last time I checked it out. As far as I can tell, there had not been any more hilarious conventions or live streaming events for a while before covid so there really isn’t new content being generated for us to mock. It’s the same stuff they keep doing, from steps out of order to outright fakery. They haven’t innovated the grift and the same questions are unanswered so where’s the fun? The fact that I see the same posters post the same things they did 3 years ago makes me QCS/FYAD concern troll style worry about the mental health of some of the posters in that thread. If you don’t have money in the game there’s nothing to really be animated about at this point. Lol yeah I can’t imagine why people wouldn’t be still interested in the largest and ongoing grifts in gaming history. Why won’t people just let it go???
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May 15, 2020 23:08
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There's an oddly large amount of people who come in here saying  geez give it up this is so lame now. Or only post when something funny and new happens.Like, why bother posting that? You're backers aren't you? For real. For you to care about people making fun of a video game you have to have some sort of investment in it otherwise you'd just ignore the thread.
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May 15, 2020 23:39
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