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Stupid_Sexy_Flander posted:And unfortunately now I know what Philip K Dick meant by "The milk is thoroughly pizzled". fo shizzle my pizzle
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# ? May 13, 2020 09:41 |
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# ? Apr 17, 2024 23:26 |
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Does anyone have the actual quote of the Cuck Tales song?
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# ? May 13, 2020 09:55 |
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barbecue at the folks posted:I was sure that could not have been a thing, a wikipedia trip later I stand corrected. Here's a nugget of information about how lion peepees can be serious business in Sweden:
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# ? May 13, 2020 11:17 |
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Splicer posted:Seems a straightforward swap, give dicks to the dicks Why give people incentive to commit treason
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# ? May 13, 2020 11:22 |
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Ghost Leviathan posted:I want to hear more about the emus. I am Australian, so it just sounds extra emusing.
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# ? May 13, 2020 13:34 |
If you want to hear more about the Ostrich and Emu bubble of the late 80s/early 90s I started a decent derail about it in this very thread starting here:D-Pad posted:I grew up on an ostrich farm. My parents started raising them very early on in the ostrich bubble that happened in the US in the late 80s and 90s because our neighbor was an exotic animal guy and was part of the original group that started the "industry" back then. It sounds like John Lee's pappy got sucked into the market at the end.
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# ? May 13, 2020 14:51 |
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Ahh, that one. Also this thread produces its own content:Ariong posted:That’s crazy.
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# ? May 13, 2020 16:55 |
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oldpainless posted:“Bless your heart”’is mostly said to girls with poppin hot booties Now this I can get behind. All yankees, take note: 'bless your heart' is used to mean exclusively 'drat you sexy,' any other explanations you hear are deliberate misinformation. And yeah, my elder relative got suckered into the emu-buying craze, then he got fed up and ate them. Pretty good in tacos!
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# ? May 13, 2020 17:53 |
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John Lee posted:And yeah, my elder relative got suckered into the emu-buying craze, then he got fed up and ate them. Pretty good in tacos! That isn't what they meant when they said you have a chance at eating your investment.
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# ? May 13, 2020 17:57 |
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Oh my god, the emu thing was actually a thing? This explains some things from my childhood
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# ? May 13, 2020 18:35 |
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To clarify: before my parents split, while they were still deep in the mutual fantasy world of religious extremism, we all lived in a small house in the backwoods of southeast Texas on an acre of poorly utilized land, where the five of us “homeschooled” kids ran around unsupervised all day eating clover and pretending to be animals. We had some cats and some dogs, and no actual friends. No public school, no neighborhood kids... We went to church and homeschool meetings intermittently because my parents’ mental health didn’t really lend itself to getting five feral children into a van, fully dressed, on time. Sometimes my mother taught piano lessons to other homeschoolers, and sometimes those kids were allowed to play with us for a half hour afterward. We were also horribly awkward, socially inept little fucks with our own burgeoning mental health and trauma problems, and we weren’t popular even with the few kids we did see sometimes. So we were quite isolated and constantly dreamed of finding magical portals to populated areas, psychic unicorns that would have conversations with us, secret populations of forest orphans, whatever. We were fairly desperate for friends of any kind. One day an emu walked into our yard. My mom absolutely panicked and locked us all in the house and called Animal Control, which was almost thirty miles away in Tomball and frankly didn’t seem to believe her. She knew it was an emu, but why an emu? Was this some kind of spiritual warfare? Was Satan sending this weird haystack with a blue neck to curse us all with rabies? To my sister and I, this was nothing short of the miracle we had always wanted. Sure, not exactly a unicorn, but fuckin look at the thing, it has to be magical somehow. This thing was definitely from Narnia. It looked just the right size to carry kids around on its back, and it was FAST. We lured it to the bedroom window with sandwich bread and hung out with it for a while. It seemed to like us, and while it couldn’t psychically communicate yet, that would probably develop with the deep emotional heart bond that would someday connect us as we ran through the forest together, seeking the portal to its mystical fairyland home. My mom walked in to find my sister hugging its neck, and me trying my goddamnedest to establish a psychic link by staring into its goblin eyes. She screamed and screamed, and Animal Control (who had just arrived) raced around the corner of the house to find my sister and me weeping and clinging to this garbage reject ostrich, begging to keep it forever. Animal Control did a great job of not taking the bird. They convinced my mom that there was a big market for exotic birds right now, that they laid huge eggs, that they ate cheap chicken feed and fire ants, and that they were in fact an ideal yard animal for a single-acre family of religious lunatics in the forest. We named her Tin Lizzie and kept her for almost six months before she had finished destroying the entire front half of the acre, run away six times, beat up the neighbor’s malamute, and utterly failed to establish any kind of psychic heart bond with any of us. Eventually my mom called some guy one of her piano students knew, and he picked the bird up and took her away, and we went back to cats and dogs and imaginary half-fairy half-mermaid friends. Up until literally just now I had no idea why an emu might have been wandering free in the woods of southeast Texas, and there have been times I wonder if I somehow dreamed it. Now I guess Tin Lizzie was just a cast-off victim of the emu boom. She never did lay any eggs.
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# ? May 13, 2020 18:57 |
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Antivehicular posted:I believe it was the n-word I thought the n word was "grandmas"
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# ? May 13, 2020 19:07 |
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This is an amazing post. Thank you
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# ? May 13, 2020 19:35 |
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elise the great posted:To clarify: before my parents split, while they were still deep in the mutual fantasy world of religious extremism, we all lived in a small house in the backwoods of southeast Texas on an acre of poorly utilized land, where the five of us “homeschooled” kids ran around unsupervised all day eating clover and pretending to be animals. We had some cats and some dogs, and no actual friends. No public school, no neighborhood kids... for the quote thread
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# ? May 13, 2020 19:53 |
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3D Megadoodoo posted:I was out drinking with a group of people and the conversation touched on prostitution so one guy volunteers that he had hired a prostitute once, in Amsterdam, when he was there with his mate. Then he checks himself and tells his common-law wife sitting beside him "oh that was before I met you, honey!" and she replies "you've only been to Amsterdam once and I drove you two to the airport".
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# ? May 13, 2020 20:54 |
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barbecue at the folks posted:This is an amazing post. Thank you They’re coming from inside the thread. Elise, you are a treasure.
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# ? May 13, 2020 22:08 |
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Dixville posted:I thought the n word was "grandmas" It was both, at different points in time Amazing story elise btw
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# ? May 14, 2020 01:35 |
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My experience as an Australian with emus is mostly that they are extremely silly looking and take massive, disgusting shits. They also apparently eat pretty much anything to a goatlike degree, including money left unattended.
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# ? May 14, 2020 08:44 |
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Ghost Leviathan posted:My experience as an Australian with emus is mostly that they are extremely silly looking and take massive, disgusting shits. They also apparently eat pretty much anything to a goatlike degree, including money left unattended. Are you sure that was an emu and not just an Australian?
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# ? May 14, 2020 08:57 |
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Ghost Leviathan posted:My experience as an Australian with emus is mostly that they are extremely silly looking and take massive, disgusting shits. They also apparently eat pretty much anything to a goatlike degree, including money left unattended. I thought the Australian experience with emus was humiliating military defeat.
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# ? May 14, 2020 13:51 |
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Random Stranger posted:I thought the Australian experience with emus was humiliating military defeat. Well yeah, if them eating our money and making GBS threads all over the place didn't suggest that.
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# ? May 14, 2020 13:59 |
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The king of the hill episode where buck strickland says "You gots to get rid of my emus hank" and hands the men a shotgun and sends them off in some field with a bunch of emus and bill feeds them and the credit sequence where theres a bunch of emus standing around where they usually stand around drinking beer but for funny forums quotes
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# ? May 14, 2020 14:17 |
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EorayMel posted:The king of the hill episode where buck strickland says "You gots to get rid of my emus hank" and hands the men a shotgun and sends them off in some field with a bunch of emus and bill feeds them and the credit sequence where theres a bunch of emus standing around where they usually stand around drinking beer but for funny forums quotes That's the episode where I just can't get over how funny the way they say 'emu' is.
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# ? May 14, 2020 14:18 |
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Ghost Leviathan posted:That's the episode where I just can't get over how funny the way they say 'emu' is. How do they pronounce it?
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# ? May 14, 2020 14:27 |
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Solice Kirsk posted:How do they pronounce it? 'emu'
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# ? May 14, 2020 14:32 |
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Captain Monkey posted:'emu' No way, that's wild.
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# ? May 14, 2020 14:34 |
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Huh. That is funny!
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# ? May 14, 2020 14:44 |
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Inceltown posted:Are you sure that was an emu and not just an Australian? All emus are Australian but not all Australians are emus.
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# ? May 14, 2020 15:16 |
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Ghost Leviathan posted:My experience as an Australian with emus is mostly that they are extremely silly looking and take massive, disgusting shits. They also apparently eat pretty much anything to a goatlike degree, including money left unattended. Collateral Damage has a new favorite as of 22:34 on May 14, 2020 |
# ? May 14, 2020 15:17 |
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Collateral Damage posted:As a European, this is my experience with the Australians as well.
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# ? May 14, 2020 17:00 |
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Solice Kirsk posted:Huh. That is funny! Very emusing!
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# ? May 14, 2020 17:06 |
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Knight posted:Subject: Your family member (SS# 123-45-6789) has died
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# ? May 15, 2020 00:43 |
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Unrealistic. Tracking updates skip a bunch of steps these days. You just get like “label printed” and and maybe “it’s in your town now”.
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# ? May 15, 2020 01:00 |
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A "neat" spin on an old joke...Grevling posted:Of course not, everyone knows religion is bull but mediums have been known to be correct sometimes. RandomFerret posted:I see... a man. Mid 30s, overweight, large beard that would be impressive if it was groomed better... he's sitting alone... the room he's in is messy but there are expensive items in it, mostly electronics... he has enough money to live comfortably but he isn't happy, and the fact that he isn't happy makes him feel worse... he thinks he should have taken that opportunity to move to the coast ten years ago... he hates who he is but he's terrified of making any big changes, so he just lives in a gay baby jail of his own making Lysistrata has a new favorite as of 01:50 on May 15, 2020 |
# ? May 15, 2020 01:35 |
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Context is unnecessary.Paladinus posted:Piss > poo poo. Lobok posted:Actually, one is less than two.
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# ? May 15, 2020 01:42 |
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Baron von Eevl posted:Pee > poop quote This is actually dependent on the endianness of your architecture.
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# ? May 15, 2020 03:14 |
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Solice Kirsk posted:How do they pronounce it? Americans say "ee-moo". It's actually pronounced "eem-yoo".
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# ? May 15, 2020 06:28 |
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Tiggum posted:Americans say "ee-moo". It's actually pronounced "eem-yoo". If that’s where your bar is for something to be so funny that you can’t get over it, I can’t imagine what happens when you hear a joke.
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# ? May 15, 2020 06:40 |
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its tiggum, my dude
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# ? May 15, 2020 07:10 |
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# ? Apr 17, 2024 23:26 |
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Google tells me "emu" comes from the Portuguese word for "ostrich." This is deeply upsetting. It's as bad as working out that "Nullarbor" is actually Latin and "echidna" is greek. Probably "kangaroo" will turn out to be French-Canadian or something next.
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# ? May 15, 2020 07:33 |