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I curse you to forget occasionally forget how to say... uh... that thing, it's blue I think? Goes in circles? Really popular right now. Agh, god, it's on the tip of my tongue, poo poo. |
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Jun 4, 2020 13:41
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| # ? Apr 20, 2024 00:22 |
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thy shoelaces will untie themselves once more per day than they would through normal wear!
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Jun 4, 2020 14:10
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i curse you with the inability to find whatever condiment you most need at the moment *spooky voice* even if it is UNDER YOUR VERY NOSE!
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Jun 4, 2020 14:54
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You are cursed with a song playing in the background every time you try to remember that other song you heard that you liked
https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
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Jun 4, 2020 15:30
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Jun 4, 2020 16:06
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oOoOo your first born son might submit their tax return incorrectly sometimes oOoOo
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Jun 4, 2020 16:21
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Your checkout line will always be the slowest. |
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Jun 4, 2020 16:57
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Barking Gecko posted:Your checkout line will always be the slowest. This actually terrifies me
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Jun 4, 2020 17:16
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Beware, for from now on any pen you try to write with will magically not do anything for at least the first 5 seconds of scribbling!!
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Jun 4, 2020 17:25
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you are cursed to accidentally spill three drinks onto clothes that aren't your best clothes but are still kinda high on the list
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Jun 4, 2020 20:20
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you are cursed with very bad duck, every egg u hatch will be a mean ol duck for 7 years |
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Jun 4, 2020 20:37
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you are cursed to open bananas from the other end
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Jun 4, 2020 20:42
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you don't know jack. worse still, you will never know jack.
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Jun 4, 2020 20:44
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There will always be a weird sound coming from your car and it is not harmful and will never get worse but despite your sincerest efforts you will never find out what it is and always have to worry it might be bad.
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Jun 4, 2020 20:52
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Goons Are Great posted:There will always be a weird sound coming from your car and it is not harmful and will never get worse but despite your sincerest efforts you will never find out what it is and always have to worry it might be bad. and whenever you take it to the mechanic it stops making the sound so you try and make the noise yourself. Then the car makes a sound that you haven't heard before and it's totally different to the noise you just made, so you look like a fool.
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Jun 4, 2020 21:03
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your internet will go out for like 2 minutes once a month or so, and by the time you pull up the service map to see if it's an outage it'll be bakc
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Jun 4, 2020 21:25
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May the dog always be outside when you need to blame it for a fart |
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Jun 4, 2020 21:33
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When you go to use mustard, the liquid stuff will always pour out and get the bread soggy no matter how much you shake the bottle first |
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Jun 4, 2020 22:18
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you'll have that fart where you think it's gonna come out quiet but it's actually really loud when you let it go
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Jun 4, 2020 22:36
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May your bread always be on exactly that age where it is too hard to enjoy regularly and too soft to make it through the toaster without ruining it entirely!
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Jun 4, 2020 22:51
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Khanstant posted:When you go to use mustard, the liquid stuff will always pour out and get the bread soggy no matter how much you shake the bottle first The counterspell for this is squeezing the musquirt into the sink before you squeeze it over the sammich https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
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Jun 4, 2020 22:58
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Pot Smoke Phoenix posted:The counterspell for this is squeezing the musquirt into the sink before you squeeze it over the sammich Curse that stops you using this counterspell
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Jun 4, 2020 23:08
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Curse for when someone tries to get rid of the evidence on the highway out of the back of their truck https://twitter.com/tw_kotsujiko/status/1268058576532025344?s=20 https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4 |
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Jun 5, 2020 00:04
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more falafel please posted:your internet will go out for like 2 minutes once a month or so, and by the time you pull up the service map to see if it's an outage it'll be bakc I’d be happy if mine only went out once a day.
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Jun 5, 2020 00:39
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Good things will happen to people around you who are obviously better off than you are.
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Jun 5, 2020 00:41
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one out of every three times you smile at a baby it will burst into an uncontrollable fit of weeping until you leave
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Jun 5, 2020 00:53
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May your girlfriend permanently change to a more practical hairstyle that is a little bit less sexy May your boyfriend stubbornly refuse to believe that he looks better without his inexplicable moustache |
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Jun 5, 2020 00:58
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newt’s arse
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Jun 5, 2020 01:12
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i used nightshade from concentrate so instead of turning into a tree that idiot just enjoys sunshine WAY more now
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Jun 5, 2020 01:28
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a pox on thee! thy week will be no better than "okay, i guess"!
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Jun 5, 2020 02:09
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A parking spot close to the store entrance will open up as you are trudging in from the distant reaches of the parking lot, having given up on finding anything closer. |
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Jun 5, 2020 02:25
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may your socks almost match, but not quite |
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Jun 5, 2020 03:49
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You will henceforth be unable to eat salsa, hummus, or yogurt without getting some on your shirt! |
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Jun 5, 2020 04:01
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Things you buy will go on sale soon after you buy them but not soon enough to still be in the refund window.
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Jun 5, 2020 04:53
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You will hear fake spoilers that sound reasonable enough to be real and will spend the entire movie wondering if they’ll actually happen.
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Jun 5, 2020 04:56
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you go to the bathroom and do a number two, but there's no bidet so you have it wipe your rear end with your hand and paper lol |
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Jun 5, 2020 05:58
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Automated motion sensing doors at stores will take 5 seconds to recognize you so any time you try to enter anywhere you get confused and look up for a bit and then it opens. |
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Jun 5, 2020 12:01
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Every time you microwave a burrito no matter how much paper towel you wrap it in or how many times you flip it there's always one bite where it's still a little cold. All of your expected wait times to speak to an agent on all customer service calls for the rest of your life are extended by one minute. caleb fucked around with this message at 12:30 on Jun 5, 2020 |
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Jun 5, 2020 12:16
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that thing where tape sticks from one hand to the other trying to get it off will last three times as long
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Jun 5, 2020 14:15
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| # ? Apr 20, 2024 00:22 |
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You will always either tie your shoes badly resulting in open shoes during your every day life or will make them so neat that you can need up to five minutes per shoe to open them up again
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Jun 5, 2020 15:41
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