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Cross posting this but I thought you'd appreciate. https://i.imgur.com/u8vcYfr.png?1
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Aug 15, 2020 03:42
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honda whisperer posted:Cross posting this but I thought you'd appreciate. Is the pawn store most of these are going to end up at next door, or is there a payday loan place between them?
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Aug 15, 2020 03:58
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It's beside a strip club lmao
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Aug 15, 2020 05:01
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hello sweet friend
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Aug 15, 2020 05:05
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drat orig site is a crypto scam now
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Aug 15, 2020 05:37
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Milo and POTUS posted:It's beside a strip club lmao Lol my kids were distracting me and almost got goatse'd. They don't know how lucky they are I opened it in a background tab.
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Aug 15, 2020 15:31
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Flexin' with $220. He can buy groceries for a family of 4 now. Edit: also, its totally tasteless to call tattoos of a bad t-shirt like that Hibakusha tattoos after the survivors of Hiroshima and Nagasaki that had clothing patterns burned into their skin, right? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hibakusha stealie72 fucked around with this message at 15:50 on Aug 15, 2020 |
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Aug 15, 2020 15:45
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He needs to head back to supply and get issued a goddamn chin.
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Aug 15, 2020 16:15
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not caring here posted:He needs to head back to supply and get issued a goddamn chin. the loving master race 
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Aug 15, 2020 16:32
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Memento posted:the loving master race we've streamlined this evergreen post's process fyi 
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Aug 15, 2020 16:42
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It'll be cool to skeet all over that tat while he's deployed
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Aug 15, 2020 16:47
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TK-42-1 posted:It'll be cool to skeet all over that tat while he's deployed I was just thinking you could make a game of crossing out words with jizz on a tattoo like that.
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Aug 15, 2020 18:23
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Midjack posted:I was just thinking you could make a game of crossing out words with jizz on a tattoo like that. The only way that back could be more perfect is if she added "Hello my name is..." right below the stupid wife poo poo.
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Aug 15, 2020 20:37
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Looking in the job listings, one popped up for "Data Entry Specialist". I click on it and "-REQUIRES ENLISTMENT IN THE ARMY OR ARMY RESERVES -BECOME A MEMBER OF THE ELITE SQUAD!!!!!!" Anyone here in the ELITE SQUAD of Excel Commandos?
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Aug 15, 2020 21:15
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I think that's the 2/123rd Keyboard Battalion - "The Fighting Fingers".
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Aug 15, 2020 23:00
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Milo and POTUS posted:It's beside a strip club lmao Well loving played. 
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Aug 15, 2020 23:01
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Vengarr posted:Looking in the job listings, one popped up for "Data Entry Specialist". I click on it and Literally this guy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPzqRpsbrGk
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Aug 16, 2020 05:53
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The correct term is Intermilitary Administrator https://youtu.be/JpgPD5M9AJs
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Aug 16, 2020 13:14
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When Dad was stationed over in Iranistan at Fort Dust, he was the only Navy guy in the middle of an almost completely Army base. However, outside of repeatedly explaining that counter-IED systems were not infallible magic, he had very little to do, so he happened to tag along for room inspections from time to time. This usually resulted in the usual "embarrassing but amusing discovery" stories - suction-cup dildos, unsecured lockers stuffed full of gay porn by thoughtful friends, maybe a turd or two for the particularly enterprising. This is not one of those stories. Today's protagonist is Cpl Louis. Louis was of average height and build and, despite working a motor pool in the Middle East, had somehow managed to maintain a shockingly pale complexion. According to those familiar with him, he spoke little and had almost no sense of humor - not that he was overly serious, but instead that he didn't really find anything funny. He was semi-popular because he was "allergic to loving around", but nobody really knew him because trying to chat with him was like explaining pornography to a mannequin. Cpl Louis typically passed room inspection with flying colors - mostly because his room had nothing in it. He had no posters, no memorabilia, no books, no games - just the standard issue: a desk, a chair, a bed, and a locker. His room was always spotless, his trashcans empty, and his uniforms clean. It had gotten to the point where Louis's room was only given a brief glance; there was never anything to find and plenty of lockers to dump and dipshits to smoke, so nobody really bothered looking. Until they found the miniature guillotine underneath his locker. In a stunning display of emotion, Cpl Louis was embarrassed by the discovery and clearly nervous. He claimed that it was a novelty cigar cutter, but it was pointed out that nobody had ever witnessed Louis smoke. He then said that he had bought it in advance to attempt to motivate him to get into the hobby, but the guillotine had no obvious manufacturing marks and was clearly hand-made. Further excuses encouraged a detailed search that revealed the back wall of his locker was merely cardboard, and meticulously hand-painted to avoid detection. Upon removing the wall, two narrow cubbies were discovered. The first, smaller cubby was full of art supplies - paints, brushes, fabrics, and so on. The second, larger cubby was full of Barbie and Ken dolls in neat stacks. Aside from a handful of obvious works-in-progress, they had all been repainted and refinished to a very realistic quality to resemble current or previous occupants of Fort Dust. The vast majority of them were also decapitated. Cpl Louis bolted instead of answering questions. He made a full-on death sprint across the base towards the closest gate, where he was unceremoniously stopped by the gate guard with a clothesline. I'm not privy to the questioning he underwent - or the answers he gave - but I do know that he was no longer stationed at Fort Dust within the week. Kith fucked around with this message at 18:08 on Aug 16, 2020 |
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Aug 16, 2020 14:42
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Welp the forever wars have been going on long enough that we now have dad stories from the war.
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Aug 16, 2020 15:41
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Based on this thread, If the guy had just said “it’s a guillotine, I’m going to use it for a prank” nobody would have bothered him or thought twice.
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Aug 16, 2020 16:20
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Headin’ down to bx to pick up my weekly bulk order of Barbies and warham paint kits.
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Aug 16, 2020 16:35
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Vengarr posted:Based on this thread, If the guy had just said “it’s a guillotine, I’m going to use it for a prank” nobody would have bothered him or thought twice. "Gonna wake up my battle buddy by cutting off his dick, it's gonna be an epic prank" - "Alright, carry on"
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Aug 16, 2020 17:10
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It's a homemade briss, I'm helping cut down on the base VD rates by offering barracks circumcision!
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Aug 16, 2020 17:43
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MA-Horus posted:It's a homemade briss, I'm helping cut down on the base VD rates by offering barracks circumcision! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4v8BVKlAfM&t=94s
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Aug 16, 2020 18:06
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50 Foot Ant’s GWOT stories just aren’t as good as his Cold War ones
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Aug 16, 2020 18:26
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Now this is a forums relic I want a foia on
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Aug 17, 2020 02:26
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Internet Wizard posted:50 Foot Ant’s GWOT stories just aren’t as good as his Cold War ones after GUILLOTINE ANT (also known as CPL ANTOINE LOUIS) returned to the states, he was re-stationed at a FORMER TALIBAN FORTRESS HOLLOWED OUT OF A MOUNTAIN. there he obtained a HOT VAGUELY ETHNIC GIRLFRIEND by FIGHTING TALIBAN GHOSTS and BREAKDANCING ON A NUCLEAR WARHEAD. he had LOTS OF SEX and was also VERY GOOD AT FIGHTING and forged EVERLASTING BONDS OF FRIENDSHIP with his LARGE FRIEND by surviving the wrath of an ORNERY SNOWMAN together. his dad was VERY COOL AND POWERFUL AND INFLUENTIAL despite being part of a WEIRD SEX CULT. every woman who met GUILLOTINE ANT wanted to have LOTS OF SEX, except the ones who didn't who were OBVIOUSLY LESBIANS OR HUGE BITCHES. GUILLOTINE ANT had a VERY LONG AND LUCRATIVE CAREER doing SUPER SECRET WAR THINGS and frequently enjoyed CHICKEN A LA KING. also, ALCOHOLISM IS FAKE. even if it was real, IT WOULD BE GOOD FOR YOU.
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Aug 17, 2020 03:17
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God dammit Ringo No!
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Aug 17, 2020 06:26
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Oh god I’m the idiot I’m reading the Ringo series Black Tide Rising. It’s so terrible across the board I have serious questions on why my non-mil buddy sent it to me. He thought a zombie apocalypse at sea would be good reading material for my time underway during covid days. 13yr old zombie fighter described as “jailbait”, “anime waifu” and “slit”. Terrible gun descriptions. Just so much garbage. Questionable science. However the “zombies” are actually fairly realistic. Scant praise for a festering pile of trash.
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Aug 17, 2020 09:45
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I also read that series. The zombies are good and that's pretty much it.
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Aug 17, 2020 09:51
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LingcodKilla posted:13yr old zombie fighter described as “jailbait”, “anime waifu” and “slit”. 
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Aug 17, 2020 10:17
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I know its ringo but how did he make something more unsettling than a main character with a progresdive motor nuerological disease who fantasies about rape and then the guys he fell in with egging him on to try it with his female friend's mom. Also he had a crush on that friend too because why not
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Aug 17, 2020 10:21
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LingcodKilla posted:“jailbait” what LingcodKilla posted:“anime waifu” the LingcodKilla posted:“slit” gently caress
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Aug 17, 2020 10:21
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Wibla posted:I also read that series. The zombies are good and that's pretty much it. Yeah it would almost be passable if they cut out the two teenage daughters.
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Aug 17, 2020 11:10
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We all know that the teenage daughters are the whole point
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Aug 17, 2020 12:18
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Kith posted:what You do not want to know any more about John Ringo. Trust me on this.
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Aug 17, 2020 12:40
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Vincent Van Goatse posted:You do not want to know any more about John Ringo. Trust me on this. Not an empty quote
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Aug 17, 2020 12:50
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Vincent Van Goatse posted:You do not want to know any more about John Ringo. Trust me on this. But the thread is great. https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3385144
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Aug 17, 2020 13:09
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Vincent Van Goatse posted:You do not want to know any more about John Ringo. Trust me on this. I don't read as often as I used to, but I've got a buddy that I bother for author recommendations every now and then when I feel like picking up a good story or two. After seeing your post, I texted him: "I saw someone reading a book authored by one John Ringo." Almost immediately, he responded with "That's because they're an rear end in a top hat. Do not read ANYTHING by John Ringo." ashnjack posted:But the thread is great. and yet the temptation is so great...............
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Aug 17, 2020 13:19
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