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Field Elves, surely? Now that I've said that, I'd like to pitch you my new film Dobby Unchained
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Aug 18, 2020 13:08
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Aug 18, 2020 16:29
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HE NEVER SCORED
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Aug 18, 2020 16:38
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Computer, show me "Dobby Hardcore". Disable safety protocols.
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Aug 18, 2020 16:43
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Sydin posted:dumbass move on Dumbledore's part, everybody knows you gotta switch succession types to primogeniture or at least elective, gavelkind just fucks everything up when you die smdh I, too, play Crusader Kings.
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Aug 18, 2020 19:04
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JethroMcB posted:HE NEVER SCORED He scored with winky.
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Aug 18, 2020 19:48
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Yestermoment posted:Computer, show me "Dobby Hardcore". Disable safety protocols. Is there any way to generate a nude Snape?
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Aug 18, 2020 22:04
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Man with Hat posted:Fleur is stuck up and acts like she's better than Molly's entire family in a really bratty way and keeps talking about how pretty Charlie is instead of any of his qualities that's not, you know, he's hot. Everyone finds her annoying as hell because for the longest time she's acting like a shallow annoying douche and she's not good enough for Molly's son at that point. You made me curious about this so I checked the section and Fleur is...actually all right. She welcomes Harry to the Burrow with breakfast in bed, talks about the wedding plans with Molly and mentions that she specifically picked a color for the bridesmaid dress that would look good on Ginny, and tries bringing up how her school had a better way of handling exams than Hogwarts (which, considering how Hogwarts is run, is extremely fair). She comes across as someone who's trying her best to connect with her fiancee's family, while trying not to feel too lonely as the others rebuff her attempts.
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Aug 19, 2020 07:42
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Harry Potter: Magic fucks with technology to the point where there are zero electronics at Hogwarts. Also Harry Potter: "Oh hey Harry I brought my radio so we can tune into to the underground resistance station! You know, the one you can only hear if you tap the radio with your wand and say the magic words?"
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Aug 19, 2020 07:51
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Do any post-book materials mention if wizards have magic-proofed televisions or computers or phones? I imagine Hogwarts would have had better inter-school unity if they had movie nights or something. Wizard twitter would still be a complete trashfire, though.
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Aug 19, 2020 08:38
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amigolupus posted:You made me curious about this so I checked the section and Fleur is...actually all right. She welcomes Harry to the Burrow with breakfast in bed, talks about the wedding plans with Molly and mentions that she specifically picked a color for the bridesmaid dress that would look good on Ginny, and tries bringing up how her school had a better way of handling exams than Hogwarts (which, considering how Hogwarts is run, is extremely fair). She comes across as someone who's trying her best to connect with her fiancee's family, while trying not to feel too lonely as the others rebuff her attempts. I remembered her being more complainy but I also apparently forgot who she was engaged to so shows what I know. But she complains a lot about the Burrow and stuff IIRC. She's super nice to Harry, though, since he "saved" her sister. She's definitely not a bad person but it's not just Molly being racist towards french people, it's most of the family finding her snobby.
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Aug 19, 2020 08:48
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amigolupus posted:Do any post-book materials mention if wizards have magic-proofed televisions or computers or phones? I imagine Hogwarts would have had better inter-school unity if they had movie nights or something. There's this thing which mentions that some wizards tried to start up a magic tv station like how there's a radio station, but the government shut it down because they thought muggles would accidentally watch it and realise magic is real. Muggles accidentally listening to the wizard radio is fine though because radio listeners will assume they just misheard whatever wizard thing they hear about, whereas tv watchers will of course assume everything they see on tv is real.
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Aug 19, 2020 09:14
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Wearing my black armband for Aragog today.
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Aug 19, 2020 09:36
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Man with Hat posted:I remembered her being more complainy but I also apparently forgot who she was engaged to so shows what I know. But she complains a lot about the Burrow and stuff IIRC. She's super nice to Harry, though, since he "saved" her sister. She's definitely not a bad person but it's not just Molly being racist towards french people, it's most of the family finding her snobby. in my experience that's exactly how any british person meeting a french person goes.
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Aug 19, 2020 09:36
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Sydin posted:Harry Potter: Magic fucks with technology to the point where there are zero electronics at Hogwarts. Wizards explicitly use 'wireless' iirc, ie a technology that's like 70 years out of date. In general most of their technology is adapted from muggle stuff long after muggles have stopped using it for the most part. In theory, Arthur Weasley's job is supposed to be stopping wizards from enchanting stuff that's too modern or suspicious. (And the entire joke from day one is that he's terrible at it and the worst offender)
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Aug 19, 2020 09:54
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Man with Hat posted:I remembered her being more complainy but I also apparently forgot who she was engaged to so shows what I know. But she complains a lot about the Burrow and stuff IIRC. She's super nice to Harry, though, since he "saved" her sister. She's definitely not a bad person but it's not just Molly being racist towards french people, it's most of the family finding her snobby. That's the thing; Molly, Hermione and Ginny all say she's a snob and she's the worst, but Fleur doesn't complain about the Burrow or anyone. At most, she makes an idle observation that it's a shame that Tonks has let herself go because of depression. She was pretty much a model house guest. It's just that whenever Fleur tries to strike up a conversation, she either gets interrupted or ignored completely. This is on top of Molly's attempts to invite Tonks to dinner in hopes that Bill would break off his engagement and get together with Tonks instead. Note that one of the reasons Molly was against Fleur was because she thinks Bill's an honest down-to-earth guy and Fleur's his complete opposite, which should have also disqualified the loud and flashy Tonks. dordreff posted:There's this thing which mentions that some wizards tried to start up a magic tv station like how there's a radio station, but the government shut it down because they thought muggles would accidentally watch it and realise magic is real. Muggles accidentally listening to the wizard radio is fine though because radio listeners will assume they just misheard whatever wizard thing they hear about, whereas tv watchers will of course assume everything they see on tv is real. They're really just going to ignore technology because it's "cultural". Wizards are so loving stupid and lacking in innovation that they should've died out already.
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Aug 19, 2020 10:24
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so a pretty accurate depiction of the (british) upper class hp basically promised millennials that they were special, and they would be granted entry into a magical secret world which would appreciate our uniqueness, unlike the dingy and unworthy mundane world this is no longer a plausible premise for young adult fiction, unlike more grounded concepts such as wizards also anime and manga are easily available now, and frankly naturo is at least 1000x more honest and useful to a kid as a take on a vaguely similar premise and near identical target audience
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Aug 19, 2020 11:05
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amigolupus posted:That's the thing; Molly, Hermione and Ginny all say she's a snob and she's the worst, but Fleur doesn't complain about the Burrow or anyone. At most, she makes an idle observation that it's a shame that Tonks has let herself go because of depression. She was pretty much a model house guest. Yeah, you're right. I did a quick look through the book because I was sure there was a scene where she complained a bunch about the house and stuff but I can't find it. Dunno where I got that idea but yeah, Fleur gets a lot more poo poo than she deserves and she deserves it much less than I remember. Ghost Leviathan posted:(And the entire joke from day one is that he's terrible at it and the worst offender) He's actually really good at it! He just breaks the law in his free time. He's like a really good DA agent who does coke.
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Aug 19, 2020 12:00
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Man with Hat posted:He's actually really good at it! He just breaks the law in his free time. He's like a really good DA agent who does coke. Nonsense, everything he does in his spare time is entirely legal and above the board (because he wrote a loophole into the law to let him get away with it).
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Aug 19, 2020 13:06
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Hodgepodge posted:so a pretty accurate depiction of the (british) upper class Should say something that the following YA fiction trend (that weren't romanticising sexual predators) was struggling as part of the underclass in a ludicrously stratified and arbitrarily divided society pitted against each other for the entertainment of the morally bankrupt wealthy
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Aug 19, 2020 13:13
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amigolupus posted:They're really just going to ignore technology because it's "cultural". Wizards are so loving stupid and lacking in innovation that they should've died out already. Their society is kept purposefully archaic by the people at the very top: the author who wanted them to seem all old-timey, possibly out of nostalgia for her own youth, in the way that so many makers of content for children tend to depict their own childhood. And of course, most of wizarding society that we know about is just about school, sports, and a couple parents' houses, because the work really wasn't made with that much depth to the world beyond school. Harry doesn't have a point where he has to consider college or entering the actual workforce, or anything a real teen ready to graduate has to deal with. Instead of figuring out what the real world after school would really be like, he goes off to live in the woods.
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Aug 19, 2020 18:29
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SlothfulCobra posted:Their society is kept purposefully archaic by the people at the very top: the author who wanted them to seem all old-timey, possibly out of nostalgia for her own youth, in the way that so many makers of content for children tend to depict their own childhood. to be honest that makes me envy harry now
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Aug 19, 2020 18:31
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Ghost Leviathan posted:Should say something that the following YA fiction trend (that weren't romanticising sexual predators) was struggling as part of the underclass in a ludicrously stratified and arbitrarily divided society pitted against each other for the entertainment of the morally bankrupt wealthy I just wanna say that in my senior year of high school english class, we read loving Hunger Games
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Aug 19, 2020 18:45
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SlothfulCobra posted:And of course, most of wizarding society that we know about is just about school, sports, and a couple parents' houses, because the work really wasn't made with that much depth to the world beyond school. Harry doesn't have a point where he has to consider college or entering the actual workforce, or anything a real teen ready to graduate has to deal with. Instead of figuring out what the real world after school would really be like, he goes off to live in the woods. The books seemed to imply that there's zero secondary schooling for wizards, it's seven years primary schooling and then you jump straight into the workforce. There are also apparently zero remedial options, since Harry gets told if he wants to be a Wizard FBI Agent he needs to get into advanced classes that require him to ace a bunch of his year five finals, and if he fails to do this then his dream is dead. It's like how when you're 15 you get constantly yelled at that your grades matter and if you slack off you won't get into a good college and then your future will be ruined, except in the Wizarding world that's actually the legitimate case vs just being hot air to try and motivate 15 year old hormonal dipshit teens.
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Aug 19, 2020 19:06
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Sydin posted:The books seemed to imply that there's zero secondary schooling for wizards, it's seven years primary schooling and then you jump straight into the workforce. There are also apparently zero remedial options, since Harry gets told if he wants to be a Wizard FBI Agent he needs to get into advanced classes that require him to ace a bunch of his year five finals, and if he fails to do this then his dream is dead. It's like how when you're 15 you get constantly yelled at that your grades matter and if you slack off you won't get into a good college and then your future will be ruined, except in the Wizarding world that's actually the legitimate case vs just being hot air to try and motivate 15 year old hormonal dipshit teens. The books barely even tap into it, but being expelled is like a death sentence if you're poor or muggleborn. Your wand's an extension of yourself, and the government snaps it in front of your eyes. You can't get anything other than menial jobs because everything requires you to have passed certain tests. It's even worse as a muggleborn since Hogwarts never teaches muggle math or science, so even if you do transfer back to a muggle school, you're completely lost and unable to keep up with the lessons. It says a lot that the Dursleys of all people thought that wizards being considered adults by the age of 17 was dumb as gently caress.
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Aug 20, 2020 05:01
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Makes me wonder if theres a black market for wands. We know other regions get their wands from different dudes than the one man everyone in Britain goes to. You could make a pretty
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Aug 20, 2020 11:03
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The twins do drop out and open a joke novelty shop, though with Harry giving them a pile of cash for it.
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Aug 20, 2020 12:40
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amigolupus posted:That's the thing; Molly, Hermione and Ginny all say she's a snob and she's the worst, but Fleur doesn't complain about the Burrow or anyone. At most, she makes an idle observation that it's a shame that Tonks has let herself go because of depression. She was pretty much a model house guest. I literally just read this because quarantine has gotten me to start reading these books for the first time, and she seems mostly like a snob who doesn't realize it but is still a nice person with zero intended malice, like hermione in the first book. Molly hates her marrying her son, but I got the feeling that hermione and ginny hate her because ron wants to bang her, so missed social cues are just excuses for them to justify having a grudge. The idle observation was starring at her own reflection in a spoon while saying "tonks really let herself go. I think that was a mistake" which does not imply the same compassion as what you said but that's about as bad as it gets; the only other thing I can think of was saying "I'm picking out bridemaids dresses, I think gold would be good because ginny's hair would look horrible in pink" which is completely innocuous by itself, but close enough for someone who already hates you to take it the worst way possible. I mean, these are characters who will snap at fellow students when they say they prefer a magic animal teacher who actually teaches them stuff because "how dare you imply that the dangerous idiot shouldn't still be teaching a class that we're going to drop the first chance we get." No poo poo they're going to get mad that you said "we do things better where I'm from." Now will someone please explain how the invisibility cloak can fit in Harry's pocket but is big enough for three teenagers to hide under and walk together, and for Harry to parkour up into a train luggage rack. Like that thing would have to be the size of 4 bedsheets sewn together Friend fucked around with this message at 16:26 on Aug 20, 2020 |
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Aug 20, 2020 16:21
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They teach Math(s) at Hogwarts. They just call it Arithmancy.
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Aug 20, 2020 16:38
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Friend posted:Now will someone please explain how the invisibility cloak can fit in Harry's pocket but is big enough for three teenagers to hide under and walk together, and for Harry to parkour up into a train luggage rack. Like that thing would have to be the size of 4 bedsheets sewn together Well, literal magic and all, but I think it also makes sense that it turned out to be a unique magic artifact without equal. Wasn't the worst retcon to say that it's the best of its kind, and the reason you don't have everyone use invisibility cloaks but not be too surprised at that one is because they're a known thing but most have downsides. Doesn't seem a stretch to have one of its qualities be that it folds up small enough to fit in any pocket but also unravels enough to cover anyone.
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Aug 20, 2020 16:51
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Its very thin like an emergency blanket
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Aug 20, 2020 17:09
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Ghost Leviathan posted:The twins do drop out and open a joke novelty shop, though with Harry giving them a pile of cash for it. You only get your wand snapped if you get expelled or try to duck out early. IIRC only the first five (six?) years of schooling are compulsory, and then you can drop out. There's an ongoing C plot in book five where the twins are ready to gently caress off and start their shop, but Molly insists on them finishing their schooling first which is part of the reason she keeps trying to sabotage their budding business.
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Aug 20, 2020 19:13
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That's British schooling, up till you're 16 is compulsory then 17-18 is optional. They changed it since the books come out so that you have to stay in some sort of education till you're 18 but it's woolly as gently caress.
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Aug 20, 2020 19:23
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PeterWeller posted:They teach Math(s) at Hogwarts. They just call it Arithmancy. Its taught by this guy and its just normal math but he keeps having to make wizard puns and pretending that the pythagorean theorem is actually a spell or dumbledore fires him 
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Aug 20, 2020 19:34
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PeterWeller posted:They teach Math(s) at Hogwarts. They just call it Arithmancy. Or as we call it in the real world, "Corporate Accounting"
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Aug 20, 2020 19:50
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BIG FLUFFY DOG posted:Its taught by this guy and its just normal math but he keeps having to make wizard puns and pretending that the pythagorean theorem is actually a spell or dumbledore fires him I took it as a joke to indicate that Hogwarts students learn a lot of mundane material as well. They just do so under silly magic names. Like they take a Scribing course that's just regular Composition with scrolls and feather pens instead of word processors.
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Aug 20, 2020 20:59
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According to google Arithmancy is just divination, but with math instead of the stereotypical fortune teller poo poo. It must really suck though because literally nobody uses it ever over the course of the entire series and the only reason we know it exists is because Hermione took it as an elective. You know, so she could never use it.
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Aug 20, 2020 21:07
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Kinda funny to imagine that Hermione is getting super into numerology in the background of the series
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Aug 20, 2020 21:11
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The list of classes at Hogwarts is kind of insane Potions Transfiguration Charms Defense Against the Dark Arts Herbology Astronomy History of Magic Flying (which seems to just be a one and done first year course? Just teaching a bunch of 11 year olds to fly on a broom once. Its literally never mentioned again after the Remembrall scene in book 1) Then the electives are Care of Magical Creatures Divination Arithmancy Muggle Studies Ancient Runes Apparition (again a like three week course when you're 17 akin to Driver's ed but with fewer standards and a ridiculous amount of bodily injury) ... That's it, that's literally all the classes offered at Hogwarts. Hermione got the ability to travel through time to take three extra classes.
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Aug 20, 2020 21:14
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Kind of seems like arithmancy and muggle studies should be mandatory idk
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Aug 20, 2020 21:30
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