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Dance Officer
May 4, 2017

It would be awesome if we could dance!
I might watch She-Ra, then.

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turd in my singlet
Jul 5, 2008

DO ALL DA WORK

WIT YA NECK

*heavy metal music playing*
Nap Ghost
i know parks and rec kind of sucks but the Ben Wyatt character actually came across to me as being a fairly realistic "high functioning" autistic person, though i'm not sure if he was specifically written as such

A Worrying Warlock
Sep 21, 2009
I always thought Ryan Gosling's character in Drive was on the spectrum, but that might just be my reading of it.

Also, for the goons in this thread that are nervous about diagnosis, it's not that scary. My therapists brought the suggestion up multiple times but I always disregarded it because autists don't display a lot of empathy, right? And I have lots of empathy!

Long story short, that general view of autism is wrong a poo poo. Also, the diagnosis wasn't scary or bad. It doesn't change anything about who you are or how you look at yourself, it just helps as a small guide in situations that you find troublesome. Like, and this is a silly example, but I can't remember people's faces for poo poo, felt incredibly uncomfortable participating with crowds and when confronted with a negative situation, I will immediately worry more about the consequences (things that can be changed) rather than show emotion about the thing that just happened (it's in the past, can't be changed). I worried why I appeared to be "antisocial", "cold" or "not caring", when I clearly did care but not in the same way as people around me. Recognizing that these traits have a cause has allowed me to view them differently and make peace with what feels okay to me, while simultaneously better understanding my environment.

Tl;dr : being diagnosed does not diminish you in any way, it just gives you more data to understand yourself and a clear view of what traits to accept and sometimes what behaviors to change.

Pixelante
Mar 16, 2006

You people will by God act like a team, or at least like people who know each other, or I'll incinerate the bunch of you here and now.

Camrath posted:

WRT fictional autistic characters, I’m frankly embarrassed to admit it but the only one I’ve seen in vaguely current media that totally nails is is Entrapta, a character in the recent She-Ra cartoon. Apparently she’s specifically and consciously coded as autistic, and it’s a pretty good portrayal of it, without it being the only aspect of her personality or being made into either a ‘devil’ or ‘angel’- she’s a complex character with her own motivations.

Binging my way through season 1, and Entrapta is clearly the best and most adorable princess.

Monstaland
Sep 23, 2003

I think Abed from Community is a decent aspie character. Also Saga Noren in Bron/Broen, the original Swedish version of The Bridge.

Monstaland fucked around with this message at 19:26 on Sep 19, 2020

credburn
Jun 22, 2016

Long before I was diagnosed, I was kind of a little obsessed with Punch Drunk Love because I'd never felt a character more relatable to me than uh... Adam Sandler's character, whose name I can't recall. He probably wasn't written to be autistic, but for years when people saw it for the first time they would tell me it was like he was just playing me.

gandlethorpe
Aug 16, 2008

:gowron::m10:
I just watched "Love on the Spectrum" on Netflix and found it very heartwarming. OP, any thoughts?

Grouchio
Aug 31, 2014

Glad to see there's a thread for this. I'll have to input my experiences dealing with high functioning autism soon.

mrfart
May 26, 2004

Dear diary, today I
became a captain.
A lot of familiar sounding stuff for me too. I was diagnosed very late. Probably because I’m a ‘light’ case. I’ll try to do an effort post on it later on. I was wondering if you ever used any medication that actually worked OP?

whydirt
Apr 18, 2001


Gaz Posting Brigade :c00lbert:
Our 2 1/2yo is still 100% non-verbal and it seems like the earliest openings for ABA therapy in the area aren't for another couple months. He would be getting early intervention services from school, but lol COVID means we just get an hour of video call coaching. Also, lol at the autism books for parents suggesting we use our network of friends and family to get relief right now.

He is at least using his visual PECS tokens from speech therapy to request certain snacks and toys, so he definitely has the desire to communicate. I just want to hear his little voice. :unsmith:

cinnamon rollout
Jun 12, 2001

The early bird gets the worm

whydirt posted:

Our 2 1/2yo is still 100% non-verbal and it seems like the earliest openings for ABA therapy in the area aren't for another couple months. He would be getting early intervention services from school, but lol COVID means we just get an hour of video call coaching. Also, lol at the autism books for parents suggesting we use our network of friends and family to get relief right now.

He is at least using his visual PECS tokens from speech therapy to request certain snacks and toys, so he definitely has the desire to communicate. I just want to hear his little voice. :unsmith:

Good luck, we have a non verbal three year old and so far we have had the only ABA provider in the area tell us they don't feel like taking our insurance because apparently BCBS federal is too much of a hassle to process, we filed a complaint with our insurance for all the use that is, and we are currently fighting with the school system to get our son a whole hour of speech therapy, while they repeatedly try to blow us off.
I know services are really location dependant, I hope you live somewhere better than we do!

whydirt
Apr 18, 2001


Gaz Posting Brigade :c00lbert:
Haha we literally have BCBS federal from my wife’s job at the VA.

cinnamon rollout
Jun 12, 2001

The early bird gets the worm

whydirt posted:

Haha we literally have BCBS federal from my wife’s job at the VA.

It's good insurance, I think I just happen to live in a very terrible area.

whydirt
Apr 18, 2001


Gaz Posting Brigade :c00lbert:
That’s fair. We live between Detroit and Ann Arbor so we luckily have lots of options. Good luck to you and your kid!

mrfart
May 26, 2004

Dear diary, today I
became a captain.
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/oct/20/at-47-i-discovered-i-am-autistic-suddenly-so-many-things-made-sense

Article in the guardian of somebody who found out they were autistic at 47, through the diagnosis of their kid.

Narmer
Dec 11, 2011

whydirt posted:

Our 2 1/2yo is still 100% non-verbal and it seems like the earliest openings for ABA therapy in the area aren't for another couple months. He would be getting early intervention services from school, but lol COVID means we just get an hour of video call coaching. Also, lol at the autism books for parents suggesting we use our network of friends and family to get relief right now.

He is at least using his visual PECS tokens from speech therapy to request certain snacks and toys, so he definitely has the desire to communicate. I just want to hear his little voice. :unsmith:


cinnamon rollout posted:

Good luck, we have a non verbal three year old and so far we have had the only ABA provider in the area tell us they don't feel like taking our insurance because apparently BCBS federal is too much of a hassle to process, we filed a complaint with our insurance for all the use that is, and we are currently fighting with the school system to get our son a whole hour of speech therapy, while they repeatedly try to blow us off.
I know services are really location dependant, I hope you live somewhere better than we do!

Please be aware that ABA therapy is enormously controversial in the autistic community. There are many people who feel they were abused and traumatized by their experiences with ABA. Even some former ABA practitioners have repudiated it. I would strongly recommend you research ABA very thoroughly before enrolling a child in it. Here is a link to a good list of introductory resources on this: https://stopabasupportautistics.home.blog/2019/08/11/the-great-big-aba-opposition-resource-list/

whydirt
Apr 18, 2001


Gaz Posting Brigade :c00lbert:
I’ve seen that it is controversial. My understanding is that much of the bad experiences come from negative reinforcement techniques used to stop stimming/repetitive behaviors and that most current ABA instead focuses on positive reinforcement and doesn’t use those older techniques any more. And at least for toddlers it’s more like individualized preschool than anything else.

Regardless, I plan on being engaged with his therapy providers and I won’t force our kid to do it if he ends up stressed by it. I don’t want him to try to be “fixed” or “cured” or other nonsense; I love him the way he is. I just want some help getting him to talk and learning some basic skills like teeth brushing, toilet training, etc.

whydirt fucked around with this message at 02:38 on Oct 20, 2020

Turpitude II
Nov 10, 2014
to officially diagnosed people: what should one expect from an assessment? and what type of professional did yours? i'm on a waitlist to have an asd+adhd assessment, but i have no idea what the actual process is and what they're actually going to do. and it's going to be at a clinic that trains and supervises provisional psychologists, because it was cheaper (and the only thing i could reasonably afford). i'm hoping that means there'll be both people with experience, and people being taught with more recent information and studies. i feel like i have pretty typical presentation, but i don't know. any situation where i have to interact with other people is difficult enough, even when i'm able to "prepare" for it beforehand and know what's supposed to happen. and i'm semi-verbal when under stress, i guess i'm worried that i'm going to have a shutdown if i don't think things are going well. which i guess would help my case, but... i don't know. what if they think i'm being too difficult.

very sorry about rambling, feel free to only read/answer the actual questions.

credburn
Jun 22, 2016

Turpitude II posted:

to officially diagnosed people: what should one expect from an assessment? and what type of professional did yours? i'm on a waitlist to have an asd+adhd assessment, but i have no idea what the actual process is and what they're actually going to do. and it's going to be at a clinic that trains and supervises provisional psychologists, because it was cheaper (and the only thing i could reasonably afford). i'm hoping that means there'll be both people with experience, and people being taught with more recent information and studies. i feel like i have pretty typical presentation, but i don't know. any situation where i have to interact with other people is difficult enough, even when i'm able to "prepare" for it beforehand and know what's supposed to happen. and i'm semi-verbal when under stress, i guess i'm worried that i'm going to have a shutdown if i don't think things are going well. which i guess would help my case, but... i don't know. what if they think i'm being too difficult.

very sorry about rambling, feel free to only read/answer the actual questions.

I should imagine that if it's a place where they diagnose autistic people, they regularly deal with more 'difficult' people than you will be on a daily basis.

To answer your question, I have observed that the diagnosis experience seems to be very different from one person to the other. I went to see a neuropsychologist for both my ASD and ADD diagnoses. The autism one only took a few visits, but I have a friend who had to go maybe six times. She's female, and as I understand it women tend not to present as strongly as men in these autistic tells. For me, I mostly answered questions, did a bunch of IQ tests or tests that felt very similar to IQ tests. I had to spend a half hour looking at like 500 pictures of eyes, and using nothing but that I was to guess what emotion they were feeling.

But really, I get why you are nervous, and I sure don't know for sure what your experience will be like, but I am reasonably confident that they'll understand how to work with you.

Gantolandon
Aug 19, 2012

Turpitude II posted:

to officially diagnosed people: what should one expect from an assessment? and what type of professional did yours? i'm on a waitlist to have an asd+adhd assessment, but i have no idea what the actual process is and what they're actually going to do. and it's going to be at a clinic that trains and supervises provisional psychologists, because it was cheaper (and the only thing i could reasonably afford). i'm hoping that means there'll be both people with experience, and people being taught with more recent information and studies. i feel like i have pretty typical presentation, but i don't know. any situation where i have to interact with other people is difficult enough, even when i'm able to "prepare" for it beforehand and know what's supposed to happen. and i'm semi-verbal when under stress, i guess i'm worried that i'm going to have a shutdown if i don't think things are going well. which i guess would help my case, but... i don't know. what if they think i'm being too difficult.

very sorry about rambling, feel free to only read/answer the actual questions.

I got a lot of tests (scenes where I had to tell what the person on the picture is feeling, pictures illustrating some phrases, etc.) and a bunch of questions (do I like or dislike phone calls, is there food I don't eat and why, etc.). In the second room, someone talked to my parents, asking them about my childhood).

Turpitude II
Nov 10, 2014

credburn posted:

I should imagine that if it's a place where they diagnose autistic people, they regularly deal with more 'difficult' people than you will be on a daily basis.

To answer your question, I have observed that the diagnosis experience seems to be very different from one person to the other. I went to see a neuropsychologist for both my ASD and ADD diagnoses. The autism one only took a few visits, but I have a friend who had to go maybe six times. She's female, and as I understand it women tend not to present as strongly as men in these autistic tells. For me, I mostly answered questions, did a bunch of IQ tests or tests that felt very similar to IQ tests. I had to spend a half hour looking at like 500 pictures of eyes, and using nothing but that I was to guess what emotion they were feeling.

But really, I get why you are nervous, and I sure don't know for sure what your experience will be like, but I am reasonably confident that they'll understand how to work with you.

yeah, i'm a trans man and i was diagnosed with depression and anxiety when i was 13, which i kinda resent, as i'm pretty sure if i were amab they might have looked closer at what i was actually experiencing instead of filing it under that and brushing everything else off. i've been through a lot of treatment for that which never worked because it never addressed my real problems, and as a result i'm kind of used to people saying, well, you didn't respond to the depression and anxiety treatment, so we can't really help you. i'm 30 now and i'm thoroughly transitioned, so i'm hoping that won't be a factor, but there's still that residual concern that any attempt at reaching out again is going to be wasted time and effort.

but you're right, they are likely to have the resources to help people much worse off than i am, and i included that information in my intake form, so they'll know that about me and work around it. thank you for the reassurance.

Gantolandon posted:

I got a lot of tests (scenes where I had to tell what the person on the picture is feeling, pictures illustrating some phrases, etc.) and a bunch of questions (do I like or dislike phone calls, is there food I don't eat and why, etc.). In the second room, someone talked to my parents, asking them about my childhood).

this one is a worry though because i test well :v: (but even then i usually need a lot of clarification was to what the test is asking me to do, or how i should answer, because i find the way people ask things confusing or imprecise, or i need to explain why i'm answering a certain way... and i absolutely can't do things that require organisation or anything on my own. for example, i could never do homework or essays for executive dysfunction reasons.)

Monstaland
Sep 23, 2003

Turpitude II posted:

to officially diagnosed people: what should one expect from an assessment?



Well, I am still a bit baffled by the speed I was diagnosed with (mild) autism. Or to be more specific Autism Spectrum Disorder. I am not sure if that has to do with me being very clearly a case of autism (which I doubt) or because they're just lazy and struggling with waiting lists. I can't get away from the idea that this could be a part of the case.

Anyway, in answer to your question; after about 8 months I received a telephone call that they're going to examine me in about two months and that I had to fill in a couple of rather lengthy questionairres which where pretty much the same as you could find online if you pick out the useful ones out of the trash. They told me I was about to be reviewed by a single psychologist but when I arrived there was another one taking notes and observing. She apologized for this because it was communicated to me that there would be only one psychologist at the first meeting. Somehow I got the sense that this wasn't an accident and that they wanted to see my reaction for that sudden change of plan. Also, when I was waiting outside before it was my turn there was someone also waiting for an appointment of which I strongly got the feeling was part of the observation. This idea was reinforced by the way we exchanged hi's, it felt way too much if he was part of the staff than just another cliënt. The way the first psychologist apologized for the sudden presence of a second psychologist triggered me in the same way. On the other hand, I have problems believing these professionals use such simplistic and gaudy observation techniques and I might just be paranoid. Still I strongly believe that was not the case because I am often correct in such sitations. They say autistics have very keen eye for details and I seem to have that keen eye specifically in social situations, the way people speak, how they sound and especially compared to how the speak and sound in other situations. And not as much in visual stuff compared to other autistics. Regarding that, things just didn't match up. Yes, I might be projecting myself into some Sherlock Holmes fantasy but I get these situations a lot and I was almost always right. My best friend 'suicided' but I figured out after a 15 seconds conversation with the police investigators he actually died to autoerotic asphyxiation. Which was confirmed later by his parents when I straightly asked them when they told me he just suicided. They didn't want me or anyone else to know the truth. Sorry for the derail.

To get back to the first meeting. I was speaking to the first psychologist with the second taking notes and such. Lot's of questions where asked about my life. About my social situations. How I cope with situations at work, in marriage, my son etc. I explained why I can't bring my mother as a witness of my early youth which they found plausible. I think it took about 2,5 hours. Later that day I had another meeting, this time a videoconference in which my wife also participated. As expected a lot of questions where asked to my wife about my behaviour and such. Both psychologists where again present and this time the second one also asked questions. This took about 2 hours. They told us that all data will be analysed and I will hear from then in some weeks (they might have given an exact date but i am not sure).

In about 3 weeks I received a phonecall from a third psychologist who happend to be the casemanager or something like that explaining me that they have enough data to diagnose me. Much to my surprise he told me they are sure I have a mild form of Autism Spectrum Disorder. I asked him, would you describe me as being an aspie if that was still an official diagnose which he confirmed. I wasn't too suprised this is the conclusion but the speed of it all really surprised me. I was expecting to get a phone call telling me what the next steps where going to be. I mean, I expected some more meetings, some tests like an intelligence test to see if I have a disharmonious intelligence profile (which I suspect and is often the case with aspergers). He told me it seems I don't really need support or anything as I seem to have it al lfigured out myself, found ways of coping and dealing with difficult situations, which is rather right. We got offered some kind of support group for me and my wife to meet other likewise couples. My wife and I agreed this could be useful and interesting and we are still waiting for an invitation for this so called course exsisting of 6 meetings guided by a psychologist. i am also still waiting for the formal diagnosis, they told me it will be send to me within 4 - 8 weeks. I am already waiting for 7 weeks.

I still don't know what to think of this. These people really came over as very professional. The non private institution is specialised in autism so who am I to doubt them but it's still psychology and there's still a voice inside me whispering psychology isn't a loving real science

edit - engrish is hard

Monstaland fucked around with this message at 09:56 on Oct 20, 2020

Gantolandon
Aug 19, 2012

Turpitude II posted:


this one is a worry though because i test well :v: (but even then i usually need a lot of clarification was to what the test is asking me to do, or how i should answer, because i find the way people ask things confusing or imprecise, or i need to explain why i'm answering a certain way... and i absolutely can't do things that require organisation or anything on my own. for example, i could never do homework or essays for executive dysfunction reasons.)

Don't worry about it. I was convinced I smashed the tests and didn't expect a positive diagnosis until they told me.

Dance Officer
May 4, 2017

It would be awesome if we could dance!

Klaaz posted:

I still don't know what to think of this. These people really came over as very professional. The non private institution is specialised in autism so who am I to doubt them but it's still psychology and there's still a voice inside me whispering psychology isn't a loving real science

edit - engrish is hard

If you have any doubts, you can probably have them explain to you what they base their diagnosis on.

I was shocked that I got my diagnosis, and I thought I would be an edge case or something. But no, I was definitely autistic and hearing the evidence being presented wasn't pleasant but it did help.

And as to your age, my parents were both diagnosed in their sixties after my diagnosis. Looking back, especially my father was a very obvious case.

Dance Officer fucked around with this message at 18:23 on Oct 20, 2020

Monstaland
Sep 23, 2003

Dance Officer posted:

If you have any doubts, you can probably have them explain to you what they base their diagnosis on.

I was shocked that I got my diagnosis, and I thought I would be an edge case or something. But no, I was definitely autistic and hearing the evidence being presented wasn't pleasant but it did help.



Yeah well, i am still awaiting the formal diagnosis on paper. I might do that after I've received it. It's not that I am so shocked by the outcome - it was exactly what I was expecting. It's more that it really feels like I've diagnosed myself and they found it plausible and thus agreed with it. On the other hand, now that I am diagnosed i notice around me ( i mean on THE INTERNET) quite a lot of people who were diagnosed in a surprisingly short period of time too so I am not too sure what to think of it but yeah I will probably ask about it when i have the official report.

Powered Descent
Jul 13, 2008

We haven't had that spirit here since 1969.

Regarding diagnosischat, what does an official diagnosis actually do for you?

Using myself as an example, I figure I might qualify as a mildly autistic (or I might just be an introvert with a few personality quirks). But I've never seen any reason to go through the hassle of a full evaluation just to get an official yea or nay. Whatever the answer might be, I don't see what practical difference it would actually make to get it.

Dance Officer
May 4, 2017

It would be awesome if we could dance!

Powered Descent posted:

Regarding diagnosischat, what does an official diagnosis actually do for you?

Using myself as an example, I figure I might qualify as a mildly autistic (or I might just be an introvert with a few personality quirks). But I've never seen any reason to go through the hassle of a full evaluation just to get an official yea or nay. Whatever the answer might be, I don't see what practical difference it would actually make to get it.

For a number of posters in this thread(me not (yet) included), the diagnosis solved a puzzle they'd been struggling with all their lives. For me, it also caused a big perspective change in what I'm good and bad at.

Second, and this might not apply to Americans, it opened doors for treatment for me that would have otherwise been closed. I and other people here have 'quirks' in their sensory inputs. In my case, my hearing functions much like a microphone and I experience all sound conciously, and I'm now taking a low dose of an antipsychotic drug to counterbalance that. A lot of autistic people have difficulties in social contact that a normal social skills training doesn't cover, the diagnosis opens that door. Finally, cognitive therapy and EMDR worked for me when I did them without anyone knowing I'm autistic, but now work much better with someone who specializes in doing these forms with autistic people.

Quaint Quail Quilt
Jun 19, 2006


Ask me about that time I told people mixing bleach and vinegar is okay

Dance Officer posted:

I and other people here have 'quirks' in their sensory inputs. In my case, my hearing functions much like a microphone and I experience all sound conciously, and I'm now taking a low dose of an antipsychotic drug to counterbalance that.
What do you mean by this? I have a really hard time ignoring things without white noise, but can follow several things/conversations at once, it just makes it almost impossible to sleep with like a tv on or the like. I can go to sleep to music, though depending on what it is it can be difficult.

Using my rudimentary meditation training helps me let things like this "pass over me" when I intentionally use it to block unwanted things, but it has a limit.

Dance Officer
May 4, 2017

It would be awesome if we could dance!

Quaint Quail Quilt posted:

What do you mean by this? I have a really hard time ignoring things without white noise, but can follow several things/conversations at once, it just makes it almost impossible to sleep with like a tv on or the like. I can go to sleep to music, though depending on what it is it can be difficult.

Using my rudimentary meditation training helps me let things like this "pass over me" when I intentionally use it to block unwanted things, but it has a limit.

I'll give a few examples. If I'm outside I hear the noise of cars in the distance, I hear the wind, and if you've ever tried to record something with a bare microphone in public, you'll know what I mean.

Mamkute
Sep 2, 2018
Have you ever gotten drunk, or otherwise inebriated? :catdrugs:

A Festivus Miracle
Dec 19, 2012

I have come to discourse on the profound inequities of the American political system.

Whistling drives me loving wild, holy poo poo my ears can pick up a dude whistling at a gas pump three hundreds yards away. It's a fun and blood-pressure raising 'quirk' alright.

ProperGanderPusher
Jan 13, 2012




I’ve always struggled with reading people unless their body language is super obvious. I’ve “compensated” for this by always assuming the worst in social situations. They crossed their arms across their chest? I must’ve said something cringe! Turns out they’re just cold. Dead air during a conversation? I must be boring them to death or I can’t communicate worth poo poo! Oh God, they must think I’m an idiot.

Took me years to relax and realize people aren’t this complicated.

Monstaland
Sep 23, 2003

Yeah I overanalyse that stuff too. Also, or especially tone of voice, changes in speaking patterns, volume changes during speech and choice of words.

22 Eargesplitten
Oct 10, 2010



Dance Officer posted:

I'll give a few examples. If I'm outside I hear the noise of cars in the distance, I hear the wind, and if you've ever tried to record something with a bare microphone in public, you'll know what I mean.

I'm somewhat different, I don't notice all the background noise but it ends up putting me somewhat on edge in a way I don't realize until it's gone. I think that's why I feel so much better in small towns and the wilderness, less background noise. I'm hoping to move up into the mountains soon since I got permission to WFH permanently, being up there does wonders for my mental health overall.

I missed this thread because I don't tend to read A/T, but I was diagnosed at 25, after just barely not being diagnosed at 8 or so. I just barely got diagnosed, I remembered a couple symptoms that I sent to the doctor that was doing my assessment and that tipped it over from negative to positive. Some therapists have said that my symptoms seem more PTSD than autism, and it's hard to tell at that age whether I have PTSD from being the bullied weird kid in school or if I was the bullied weird kid in school because I have autism. I do struggle with eye contact, I tend to look at someone's mouth or nose which also helps me pay attention to what they're saying and is close enough to the eyes that nobody notices (I think).

One of the biggest struggles I have found is the lack of support resources beyond talk therapy for adults with autism. There was one website, wrongplanet.com, which was recommended to me but it's one of the most toxic places I have ever seen. I hate to use the world "hugbox" because it's a pretty gross word given the context, so maybe echo chamber. A bunch of incels telling each other that there's nothing wrong with them and it's the world that needs to change to accommodate all of their lovely behaviors. Meanwhile they run all of the autistic women off the site by being gross incels. It's like there's more resources for support for the family of autistic people than the autistic people themselves once they are adults. I've had insurance that would cover special treatment for autistic children, but not the employee if they had autism. I don't know, maybe if I had challenged its legality on the grounds of ageism I could have gotten it covered, but I don't know what resources there even are even if they were covered.

One question I have for other people in this thread, I know a lot of autistic people have to wear "masks" or code-switch to fit in with the people around them, have any of you found that so ingrained that you don't know how not to wear a mask anymore? It's like the only time I can relax fully is when I'm completely alone, but I still feel like I don't know who I am behind all the masks. I know I can be me by myself, but I couldn't describe me, if that makes sense.

turd in my singlet
Jul 5, 2008

DO ALL DA WORK

WIT YA NECK

*heavy metal music playing*
Nap Ghost
There are better autistic communities out there than that shithole you described. #actuallyautistic is a good starting place for social media (IG, Twitter, tiktok... is Tumblr still a thing?). There are also tons of groups and pages on facebook, though they vary wildly of course.

Masking and "unmasking" are pretty common topics of discussion in those communities (as is just about everything you brought up in your post). It's not really something I feel I struggle with personally though

22 Eargesplitten
Oct 10, 2010



Ugh, I might have to get back on Facebook then :negative:

I quit months ago and have been better for it, maybe I need to do a purge of the stuff I follow and figure out how to un-follow politics, although I'm pretty sure Facebook will do everything in its power to prevent that.

alexandriao
Jul 20, 2019


Klaaz posted:

I think Abed from Community is a decent aspie character. Also Saga Noren in Bron/Broen, the original Swedish version of The Bridge.

iirc dan harmon talked about how he read up a bunch on autism (mostly stuff written by autistic people) for the character abed as soon as people said Abed is autistic. And while originally the author insert was Jeff, as he read he started realising he related to the stuff he was reading very deeply, and realised the actual author insert was Abed :kimchi:

alexandriao
Jul 20, 2019


whydirt posted:

I’ve seen that it is controversial. My understanding is that much of the bad experiences come from negative reinforcement techniques used to stop stimming/repetitive behaviors and that most current ABA instead focuses on positive reinforcement and doesn’t use those older techniques any more. And at least for toddlers it’s more like individualized preschool than anything else.

Regardless, I plan on being engaged with his therapy providers and I won’t force our kid to do it if he ends up stressed by it. I don’t want him to try to be “fixed” or “cured” or other nonsense; I love him the way he is. I just want some help getting him to talk and learning some basic skills like teeth brushing, toilet training, etc.

You might already know this, but I just want to add that stimming should really only be prevented if it is actively harmful.

Fundamentally it is a way to cope with too much sensory input, by creating an input that can be focused on to help ground the person, like getting a signal through all the noise. At least, that's how it works for me (I rock when I'm sitting on my bed, I used to vibrate my legs constantly for the same reason) and a few diagnosed autistic people I know. Stopping all stimming is bad because it means that the person no longer has a way to cope with being overloaded, meaning it's a straight jump from being overloaded to melting down.

Removing stimming is just removing the symptoms of being overloaded, and removing a useful mechanism for the person to cope with being overloaded.

It's loosely analogous to how you don't teach a dog not to growl, because growling is the dog communicating that it is stressed, and is a useful warning sign* to the owner to help them notice and improve the situation. Without growling the dog goes from being stressed to biting, which is obviously a really bad thing. Instead you teach biting hibition, and you keep note of what stresses the dog and what they're trying to communicate, and remove them from situations that stress them out to that degree.

* - one of many, but people don't tend to notice the glances and side-eyes, and other kinds of body language that dogs use to communicate.

(I realised while writing that analogy that one reading of it probably implies I am comparing autistic children to dogs :yikes:. That's... not the take away I intended nor the comparison I wanted to draw, so I have tried to edit it to make it not have the same implications, but, they might still remain. I'm sorry if they do.)

Violet_Sky
Dec 5, 2011



Fun Shoe
I think I may be autistic. I'm a cis woman who was diagnosed with NVLD back when I was 7 or so. My parents and other adults noticed something was strange about me from the time I was around 3. I could read all kids' names on their cubbies but had trouble recognizing faces. I eventually learned to read at age 3 but couldn't put my thoughts on paper due to some kind of mental block I eventually overcame. (I don't know how.) Like many posters I struggle with eye contact (except for people who I know really well) and preferred to ignore other kids playing by myself in my own little world. I was constantly being tested over and over in school and eventually sent to a psychiatrist. I got placed under the NVLD label due to the fact I looked into my mom's eyes when I spoke. This was in 2000 so I don't know if the autism spectrum was a thing yet. Reading this thread and other videos explaining autism have got me wondering about my own diagnosis. Maybe I'm just borderline.

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turd in my singlet
Jul 5, 2008

DO ALL DA WORK

WIT YA NECK

*heavy metal music playing*
Nap Ghost
it's v common for people who don't act exactly like the stereotype of autism to not get diagnosed

i didn't get diagnosed until i was like 27 even though i'm obviously autistic???????

women and minorities especially have this problem from my understanding

This is an interesting article written by a late diagnosed woman:

https://howilostallmyfs.medium.com/when-youre-autistic-but-don-t-seem-like-it-1430209b92d1

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