I'm gonna torch my junk

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vanisher

it really hurts why does everyone keep saying this is supposed to feel nice

# ? Nov 21, 2020 05:34

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# ? Apr 24, 2024 11:04

vanisher

my junk is just charcoal at this point

_{Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext}

# ? Nov 21, 2020 05:34

City of Glompton

*nods knowingly* it's difficult, being from middle america

thank you PSP for the beautiful spring sig

# ? Nov 21, 2020 05:36

Horrible Butts

The biggest erogenous zone? The brain.

https://giant.gfycat.com/sillyremorsefuldipper.webm
_{Thank you Prof. Crocodile for the fun festive winter sig!

Arcane gob born of Khanstant's goblin gumball machine!}

# ? Nov 21, 2020 05:36

vanisher

some priest: "well that doesn't sound good either"

_{Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext}

# ? Nov 21, 2020 05:37

vanisher

some dare cop: "you know i'll bet you kids think torching is cool and hip" (spins chair around and sits on it backwards) "but listen up jokers- it's not only bad for you, but you'll totally wreck your sack." (little sock puppet that kinda looks like a lump of charcoal pops its head up from behind the chair and begins to rap)

_{Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext}

# ? Nov 21, 2020 05:41

Horrible Butts

Well I'm a burnt pair of balls and I'm here to rap
About never ever ever ever burnin' your sack
Take it from me I been around the block
I toasted both of my nuts and most of my cock

https://giant.gfycat.com/sillyremorsefuldipper.webm
_{Thank you Prof. Crocodile for the fun festive winter sig!

Arcane gob born of Khanstant's goblin gumball machine!}

# ? Nov 21, 2020 05:54

Macnult

City of Glompton posted:

*nods knowingly* it's difficult, being from middle america

# ? Nov 21, 2020 05:57

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

torching ur junk is fine op. but when u start talking about touching it, I'm outta here

# ? Nov 21, 2020 06:04

Buttchocks: No, I like my hat, thanks.

I can't feel this at all. It's just wasting the flashlight batteries.

# ? Nov 21, 2020 07:56

Moo Cowabunga: [Office Worker.

It will be a most illuminating endeavour.

Platinum User Pot Smoke Phoenix!

VANISHER

HEATHER PAPPS

https://giant.gfycat.com/WellgroomedImperfectHaddock.webm the vanisher

# ? Nov 21, 2020 08:13

Ass-penny

City of Glompton posted:

*nods knowingly* it's difficult, being from middle america

# ? Nov 21, 2020 10:20

pecan

Horrible Butts posted:

The biggest erogenous zone? The brain.

ya i guess its made a lot of mistakes

# ? Nov 21, 2020 13:08

Barking Gecko: Mahoro says, "Naughty things are bad."

vanisher posted:

my junk is just charcoal at this point

# ? Nov 21, 2020 15:39

Prof. Crocodile

Horrible Butts posted:

Well I'm a burnt pair of balls and I'm here to rap
About never ever ever ever burnin' your sack
Take it from me I been around the block
I toasted both of my nuts and most of my cock

# ? Nov 21, 2020 16:07

vanisher

Buttchocks posted:

I can't feel this at all. It's just wasting the flashlight batteries.

look son, over there in the woods. What's that glowing over there?

# ? Nov 21, 2020 16:08

google THIS

Wincing in painful memory whenever I hear the part of "Sleigh Ride" where they sing about watching the chestnuts pop

# ? Nov 21, 2020 18:10

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

look I'm not gonna kinkshame but people who AREN'T into torching their junk are the real sickos

# ? Nov 21, 2020 19:16

Slush Garbo: FALSE SLACK
is
BETTER
than
NO SLACK

sure a trimmer works, cost you like 20 bucks for one

2 dollar Bic lighter? lasts for yeeeears

# ? Nov 21, 2020 19:46

Iron Chef Ramen: HA HA! YOU HAVE CHOSEN POORLY!

i cut hole into my smoker so I can gently roast my junk. its much healthier

# ? Nov 21, 2020 20:36

vanisher

Aficionado goon lighting up with a cigar torch

# ? Nov 21, 2020 20:41

The Voice of Labor

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQ5uOz8x4cA

your junk is fine

as a chalk outline

# ? Nov 21, 2020 22:03

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

I had mine steam cured, dried and shellacked.

# ? Nov 22, 2020 01:18

more falafel please: forums poster

I'm gonna torch my junk
only got 20 dollars in my pocket

thanks Saoshyant and nesamdoom for the sigs!

# ? Nov 22, 2020 05:42

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

setting up an onlyfans where people pay me to talk them out of torching their junk :evilbuddy:

# ? Nov 22, 2020 05:45

more falafel please: forums poster

Kief Richards posted:

setting up an onlyfans where people pay me to talk them out of torching their junk

junkoff discouragement

thanks Saoshyant and nesamdoom for the sigs!

# ? Nov 22, 2020 05:50

Macnult

horny for a plasma cutter

# ? Nov 22, 2020 08:46

GODSPEED JOHN GLENN: I put my thumb up my bum and shut one eye, and my thumb blotted out the planet Earth.

You know what they say, one man's junk is another man's campfire

# ? Nov 22, 2020 11:25

pecan

Macnult posted:

horny for a plasma cutter

the medical students gathered around the table in the morgue

"And then what happened, doctor?"

"By the time he was done, all that was down there was dead space"

# ? Nov 22, 2020 13:35

SIDS Vicious

cooking my junk sous vide, so i have an excuse to sit in the tub all day

# ? Nov 22, 2020 20:24

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

posting the link to my gofundme to pay for a tank for my acetylene torch

# ? Nov 22, 2020 20:45

vanisher

"This year at the olympics the torch runner shall go empty handed to honor the defenseless who lost their lives in the world's wars."

"Wait how will they carry the flame"

# ? Nov 22, 2020 21:10

Heather Papps: hello friend

"gently caress i make one typo while sexting and now i'm buying a butane torch at a gas station. this better work"

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Nov 22, 2020 23:42

Heather Papps: hello friend

"i don't want anybody else, when i think about you i torch myself i torch myyysseeeeelf" begins playing over the radio in the store

Heather Papps posted:

"gently caress i make one typo while sexting and now i'm buying a butane torch at a gas station. this better work"

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Nov 22, 2020 23:43

alexandriao

City of Glompton posted:

*nods knowingly* it's difficult, being from middle america

well someone's gotta carry the torch

# ? Nov 23, 2020 04:37

Stoner Sloth

HOT girls in your area want to torch your junk now!

sigs by the awesome Manifisto, Vanisher, City of Glompton, Pot Smoke Phoenix, Nut, Heather Papps,Prof Crocodile, knuthgrush, Ohtori Akio, Teapot, Saosyhant, Dumb Sex Parrot, w4ddl3d33, and nesamdoom!! - ty friends!

# ? Nov 23, 2020 07:56

Stoner Sloth

using the workplace urinal and getting knowing smiles from the other men at my screams of agony and the clouds of steam rising up from my blackened junk. "looks like someone had a big weekend!" they later say as they walk past, giving me an approving pat on the back.

can't let them know that it was just a terrible and somewhat inexplicable BBQ accident

# ? Nov 23, 2020 07:59

Escape From Noise

Stoner Sloth posted:

using the workplace urinal and getting knowing smiles from the other men at my screams of agony and the clouds of steam rising up from my blackened junk. "looks like someone had a big weekend!" they later say as they walk past, giving me an approving pat on the back.

can't let them know that it was just a terrible and somewhat inexplicable BBQ accident

# ? Nov 23, 2020 16:55

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# ? Apr 24, 2024 11:04

Ass-penny

You know what they say...
A junk to the torch
Is worth two on the porch.

# ? Nov 24, 2020 07:05

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > I'm gonna torch my junk

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